Auntie Anxiety

This was my second episode and, just like the first one I watched, it made me roar with laughter. I live alone and watch tv alone so this show validates all my thought bubbles. And I simply love the idea of watching people watching television....it's so meta! The Zenos always have the best snacks.

Just saw my first episode and it has instantly become my new favorite show. I was laughing my ass off. And I definitely have to get one of those neck pillows like the boys in the bed watching with their parents use. I want to move in with the Zenos.

I'm hoping this pisses off Judge Salas even more. But that's just because I'm so mean-spirited.

Dear Jac, I'm just not that into you. Sincerely, Tre

That Kober lady looked like Tara Reid's lost identical twin. Even down to the wrinkled knees. Not a good look.

I'm still watching but it is becoming difficult to stay focused. I keep seeing clowns and ice cream cones and pumpkins while I'm watching because it is so stupid and over the top. Elsbeth goes from legal savant to idiot because she sees a magazine cover and the AUSA. Kalinda's magical vagina which gets everything it wishes for but can't seem to come to terms with its sexual orientation. Eli has morphed from a reasonably believable character into a caricature of a Nervous Nellie. Cary Agos has become a footnote at his own firm. And what happened to Robyn? Remember her? Did I miss the episode where she left? Possibly I slept through it.

Breezy, you beat me to it. The only worthwhile part of the show was when they were hanging with the Great Danes and the bulldog. Andy, please let's put this show out of its misery.

The babysitter shouldn't have been surprised, nor should she take it personally. The Guidices have a talent for not paying anyone for services, regardless of who you are--a babysitter, a fertility doctor, a contractor, the government. They are equal opportunity grifters. Leisawoo, I too am sorry to hear about your sister. My ex-husband's father died from ALS and I saw the struggles my former FIL and the family encountered.

And then Melissa will follows suit, because, you know....... I have no doubt that the four beautiful daughters are going to end up making spectacles of themselves.

I hope she'll remember to bring the extra long twin sheets. Perhaps we should send her an "off to college" checklist from Bed Bath and Beyond.

I'm worried about their dogs! I care more about that than Joe's and Teresa's welfare.

If there's another season, I'll watch. Was sorry to see Bunnie (from The Wire) being a bad guy. If nothing else, the show moves quickly, which gives it a 24 vibe. I like the ride. Sean Bean is an added bonus.

If nothing else, the four beautiful daughters will do all their reading assignments because they'll be afraid of going to prison if they don't.

Not sure exactly why, but suddenly my inner voice said, "Uh oh. Better call Saul."

Coming soon to a Dollar Store near you......

What with the accountants and the lawyers being the ones to blame, should we assume that Joe found them at Acme CPAs and JDs? Regarding the 4 bottles per night of wine, is Joe trying to drain the container of Fabellinis single-handedly?

Well, that was incredible, as in, unbelievable. And if looks could kill, Joe would have already felt that knife in his head? Back? Whatever the hell he said the other night. Teresa will never admit to herself that she is just as guilty as he is. And how clear was it that she has absolutely no intention whatsoever to allow Melissa or Joe Gorga to spend time with HER daughters. As if now is the time for her self-righteous attitude.

And I'm thinking that Joe will start getting "lonely" (read horny and in need of someone to make him feel better about his plight) right around the holidays, will impregnate another woman/his mistress/brainless bimbo/one of Teresa's mortal enemies and the baby won't be due until after Teresa is out. Joe won't tell her about it, but the baby momma and Teresa will end up crossing paths at Club Fed visiting day. Then Teresa will run back in to the prison and force Joe to have sex with her, a la the vineyard debacle.

If Joe were a drug addict, would the judge have allowed him to be home with the kids by himself? Drugs, alcohol, whatever it is, it makes no sense to me. Just one more thing that their four beautiful daughters can be humiliated about.

Funny, because I've gone in the opposite direction. I almost never tune into Bravo anymore. My last show there of interest is Top Chef, but after Padma's gratuitous prancing in a fringed bikini last season(?), I have pretty much had enough. I'll tune in this season because it was filmed in Boston, my hometown. Of course I watched the Joe and Teresa Stupidity Tour on Monday and will watch the second half tonight, but the lame ass conflicts and the manufactured drama in all the franchises drove me back to scripted tv, which can be quite good, now that networks like AMC and TNT realized audiences can handle more complex story lines and darker plots.

Let me get this straight: Alicia is planning to run for SA and have all of her dirty laundry aired to the public because it wasn't enough for the kids to have to live through that whole episode with their father? How loving and protective of her. This show is bordering on the ridiculous. I'm sort of not caring about anyone on the show. Eli is being written like a caricature of himself, the entire takeover of FA by Diane and the others from LG is implausible, and it is becoming clearer and clearer that Will was the heart of the show. By the way, I don't think it was mentioned that the detective on the stand played Artie (the restaurant owner) on The Sopranos. The best part of the show for me is recognizing familiar faces.

Wait....what? I thought I heard her say in a voice-over in the latest episode of RHONJ that Joe was so romantic. You know, like at the table in the restaurant when Joe said he had a boner just looking at her. Who wouldn't swoon at that?

It sort of reminded me of when I'm walking my dog, she pees where another dog just peed to show mark her territory and then the first dog will re-mark it. I wish I could come up with a word worse than "pathetic" to describe Teresa's behavior in the vineyard.. Such a good role model for her four beautiful daughters.

The banks and sub-prime lenders were throwing money at anyone who had a pulse, as opposed to 2009, when I tried to get a mortgage to buy my current house before I unloaded my old house which was FULLY paid for. I had no debt, a great credit rating, a lot of money in assets (including stocks, bonds, cash, in addition to the house) and I had to jump through hoops ad infinitum. I had a Certificate of Deposit come due, I cashed it in and took out $200 of that to use, and the bank wanted to know where that $200 was. Umm, I spent it on groceries? Thus, I get bullshit when I hear about people using their refinancing as an ATM machine.

A few pages back, right after watching the horror show of denial and victimhood, I mentioned that not only is Gia being made to parent the younger beautiful daughters, but she is also being made to parent her own mother. What a shitty thing to do to your kid. I would have told Gia that all she needs to do is concentrate on herself, get good grades, try not to let this situation determine her own future and that no matter how bad things are, they are all going to live to see another day. Since Teresa has absolute no level of sophistication, that would have been far beyond her ability, not to mention having to put three words together in a comprehensible sentence. I also remarked about the humiliation and how scarring this will end up being for the four beautiful daughters. I remember telling my ex, when we were separated and he was losing his license to practice law, that if I wanted to be humiliated, I could do that all by myself without his help, thank you very much. Thank you, Baby Jesus. I was wondering if Teresa applied to college via early decision.