Maharincess

Thank you for this. One of the main reasons I escaped that relationship is because I didn't want my daughter to grow up thinking that being abused was normal in relationships and I didn't want my son to grow up to be an abuser. My son is a wonderful partner to his girlfriend of almost 10 years but I know he would have been complicated different if I'd stayed. He's told me everything he is today is because of his dad (we refer to their biological father by his initials whenever we mention him). Thanks again everyone. I appreciate the advice so much.

Thank you both. @SweetieDarling, it goes without saying that we wouldn't tell her about the meth lab, she doesn't need to know that. @SPLAIN, what you said is pretty much how we are planning to tell her. That I was married to a man who hurt me and then I found her grandpa who loves me and our family and couldn't love us more if he did share blood with them. She adores her grandpa, I have pictures of him, a 6 foot 4 inch truck driving Teamster crammed into a tiny pink chair having a tea party with her and her dolls. He's also had his nails painted multiple times and once he let her color in his tattoos with pink permanent marker.

Ok, this is petty as hell but as a lifelong Bay Area resident I have to clear something up. Vallejo, where Ashley and Bar live is NOT a part of the Bay Area. It's 707, Solano county and that's not the Bay Area. I don't know why they keep showing the Golden Gate and different shots from San Francisco every time they show Ashley's segments. They should show the Benicia bridge which separates Vallejo from the actual Bay Area and is much closer to Vallejo. And Vallejo is about 85 percent scary neighborhoods, lots of crime and ghettos. Bar's mom fits right in, that should tell you all you need to know. Ok, glad I got to vent that. Lol. I lived in Vallejo for a very short time and ran away as soon as I could.

I need some advice my friends. A little back story first. My kids biological father was abusive and I left him when my daughter was 2 years old and my son was about 4 months. He stalked and harassed me for about a year, then disappeared and next I heard of him, detectives were at my door to tell me he had died in a meth lab explosion and needed my help to identify the body. In the meantime I had met Luke when my kids were 5 and 3 and he's been their daddy ever since and he's the best dad. He's also a fantastic grandpa and our grandkids adore him. Luke and I celebrate 29 years together in May. My 9 year old granddaughter has been asking a lot of questions lately, like how come my daughter and son don't have their daddy's name like she and her brother do. My kids half brother has also contacted them and wants to reconnect. My granddaughter doesn't understand how he is her uncle and her mom's brother but not my son. My daughter and I know it's time to sit her down and explain our family. Neither of us has ever been in a situation like this and have no clue where to start. We're of course going to do the "family doesn't have to be blood and grandpa doesn't love you any less because you don't share blood" but other than that we're stumped. How do you tell a little girl that her grandpa isn't her "real" grandpa. He is her real grandpa in every single way that's important, but you know what I mean. Did we do her wrong by waiting so long? Should this have always been a part of conversation so she understood from the start? We're both feeling guilty about it. Any advice???

Apparently this was on Reddit. I don't go to Reddit but I copied it from another site. Any guesses as to who this may be? @Lantern7, if anybody has the scoop I figured it would be you. A reader writes: I’m currently on a hiring committee for a newly established role in my division. It’s designed for someone with a marketing background, but involves a lot of direct interaction with clients on projects. This person will manage a team within our marketing department, and it’s a relatively senior position. We’ve had our first set of interviews, and one candidate stood out particularly in terms of her experience, practical skills, and overall demeanor. Although I can’t say that she’s unequivocally qualified over the others, it seemed pretty clear that she should be brought back for a second round. After her first interview, she received very positive feedback and seemed like an obvious choice to return. Yesterday, however, one member of the committee mentioned that a quick Google search of her name brought up that she had been a cast member on a reality show about a decade ago.Admittedly, the show is not one remembered for its tastefulness (think along the lines of The Real World or Jersey Shore). This news seems to have soured most of the committee on her, and it doesn’t look like she’ll be brought back. They’re arguing that someone who will serve in a public and managerial role should not have this type of history, and that her atypical first name means that a client or coworker will likely remember her from the show. I’m unconvinced. I think that her qualifications are such that she should be considered, and that a qualified applicant should not be blacklisted indefinitely because they were on MTV once in their twenties. A few are also unhappy that she left this off of her resume and didn’t bring it up to us in the first interview, which I find a bit ridiculous. It isn’t related to her professional experience, and she shouldn’t be tasked with casually bringing it up each time she’s in the running for a job. That being said, I’m easily the most junior member of the hiring committee, so I don’t know if this is something I should spend capital on, but I feel like rejecting this candidate outright for a years-old action would be unfair to her. At the very least, she deserves to be brought back in and be asked about this part of her past. How can I advocate for her, or should I bother? Any help would be greatly appreciated!

To me, it looks like Maryssa is trying to figure out the easiest way to snap her neck. Poor little Kaden, he's probably seen these people a handful of times in his life and now he's going to be thrown in the kid pile for whole weekends. He doesn't know these people and he's only 4! I feel so bad for him. I agree that Jenelle will be jealous of any attention that is given to Kaden. That poor baby is going to go through he'll in that house.

I wouldn't care even if it was shot 2 hours ago. I can't imagine why anyone would care about anything from them.

Doing nothing is the solution. When a kid does that night after night, whining and calling out that they want a story or a drink of water or whatever, doing nothing and ignoring them is the solution. Debra was just giving in to Ali's demands. @deaja, I totally agree.

She only wants a girl because Vee and Jo have one and Jo is not allowed to have something she doesn't have. It's just simply not allowed. I remember her saying once after Lincoln was born that she doesn't want a girl and is happy to be a boy mom. Now Jo has ViVi and now Karl wants a girl.

Oh, ok. I get what you mean now. I think the kids who will be the most affected and plain old fucked up from growing up on camera are the Gosselin kids. One of them has already been sent away for "mental problems" which of course his mother got on national television and told the world about. Those poor kids had permanent stage lighting and cameras in their bedrooms from the time they were born. We should probably take this to Small Talk.

Whoa, I must disagree with this. I think molesting 4 of one's sisters, one of which was only 5 years old to be pretty damn off the rails. That entire family is off the rails and leading the train wreck in so many ways.

@Bridget, I'm recovering from surgery and am also doped up. I guess the pain medicine affects you the same as it does me, it doesn't make me sleepy it wires me up and I can't sleep. This was my 8th surgery and was minor compared to my others. I hope you're feeling better soon!! ?

I just saw an episode where I'd label Debra a shrew, It was the Family Bed episode. Debra kept giving in to Ali's whining every night that she wanted a story/was hungry etc. Debra always gave in and let Ali sleep in their bed and Ray wanted it to stop. He rightfully told Debra to ignore her and go to sleep but once again Debra had a fit and went to sleep with Ali in her bed. The next morning she's bitching and complaining that she didn't get any sleep, which if she hasn't ignored Ray's advice again she'd have gotten some sleep. The way Debra kept insisting that Ali HAD to be in bed with one of them or she couldn't sleep reminds me of so many lazy parents who'd rather give in to their kids whining instead of actual parenting them.

I do the same thing if someone thinks I work at a store, I'll still tell them where it can be found because I know my regular grocery store like the back of my hand. I'm also a magnet for people when I'm out, especially elderly people. I can't tell you how many times I've stood in a store listening to an older person's life story. They always seem so lonely that if I have time, I'll stay and listen as long as they need to talk. One elderly woman asked for my email about 2 years ago and we still email each other to this day. It happens a lot at my pharmacy and the grocery store. They've always been drawn to me for some reason, even when I was young. My kids always called me the "old people magnet". I like kids and elderly people so I don't mind a bit when either approaches me. Kids are fascinated by my wheelchair and walker so I've spent a lot of time talking to them about it.

She may be the most mature but she's not very smart if she thinks that Kyle will start acting like an adult all of a sudden now that he's 35. She seems to think that there's a magical switch that will change him the minute the switch hits 35. I agree with those who have no sympathy for Stephen. I'm also an atheist and thought his eye rolling during the prayer was so disrespectful. When I'm in that situation I just sit quietly until the prayers are over. Stephen is just such a smug little asshole that it's hard for me to feel bad for him. I doubt he feels sympathy for anyone else.

I have never worked retail but I can imagine how hard it must be to deal with asshole customers. I never want to add on to their bad day by bitching and complaining about something that isn't their fault. My daughter works at a high end hotel and she gets treated so horribly. One time a doctor showed up 4 and a half hours before check in time and demanded to be let into his room early. My daughter tried over and over to explain that the room isn't ready and reminded him of check in time. She even offered him a voucher to the hotel restaurant to use while he was waiting. He refused and kept yelling at her. 2 days later this rich, asshole doctor wrote a horrible note to her bosses about how rude and unprofessional she was. He didn't get his way so he tried to mess with her job. I like to think that I'm a nice person in general. If I do happen to act like an ass, I end up feeling so bad about it that I end up with physical stomach pains. I have never been nice to a retail person hoping I would get a discount or some type of deal from them. I'm nice because if they're dealing with mean customers or are just having a bad day, maybe a smile and some nice words will make their day better.

I'm not a nice person because I'm trying to get something from people, I'm just nice to everyone because that's how I am. I'm not an asshole, I'm a friendly person. When I say it pays to be nice, I don't mean pays in terms of me getting something material back, it pays to be a nice person in general because if you're a nice person, that's what you get back in life. If you're an asshole, that's what you get back.

Out of the 3 dogs the only one who hates the vacuum is Granny and she can't hear it. She only freaks out about it if she sees it moving so I try to get it done when she's on the other floor of the house. Murphy is my husband's road dog so he's used to the big, loud truck engines and Bunny seems to think that the vacuum signals feeding time.

We actually had very different skin tones. I stand by my comment that it pays to be nice and friendly. No matter the situation.

My car Trixie doesn't mind the vacuum at all. When it gets pulled out she goes halfway up the stairs and sticks her head through the rail to watch it. Kaylee always tried to herd it.

We loved that show. We always call closed eyes pictures "an Earl Hickey". I don't think it's unfair at all for people to get deals or coupons because they asked. If the other people don't know to ask, that's on them. I went to the craft store once and just about bought out their purple yarn section. I was joking with the cashier and making her laugh. I went to the car and decided to go back in for a new yarn carrier thing. It cost 60 dollars but she scanned a half off coupon for me without me asking. It pays to be nice and friendly sometimes. I'm not a haggler and I never ask for a deal or anything, (except at the flea market)but I don't think it's wrong when people do it.

LOL. I think she's just nutso. Sometimes she'll sit and just stare at me for the longest time, I'm talking like half an hour or more. She doesn't move a muscle, just sits and looks at me. I watch her out of the corner of my eye, it gets a little creepy sometimes.

You've seen pictures of me. I look like an alien when I smile in pictures.

Those are the only things I wear a dress for, weddings and funerals. I have 2 summer wedding/funeral dresses and shoes and I have the same for winter. I refuse to wear hose with them though. @Wiendish Fitch, I am so with you. I HATE having my picture taken and I'm pretty sure I am the least photogenic person ever born. There is only one picture taken of me in my entire life that I like, just one and I was 16. I did relent and let my daughter take pictures of me and the grandkids because she convinced me that the kids would want them one day. I let her take a few pictures of us once a year and I try my damndest to hide behind the kids as much as I can.

Do any of you with bird feeders have issues with rats eating the stuff that falls on the ground? I used to have a seed feeder and a hummingbird feeder outside my living room window and I loved watching them and it was great cat TV for my brat. My cat was going nuts at the window one day and there was a rat on the ground eating the seeds. I kicked at the wall and he just looked up at me and kept eating. My seed feeders came down that day and I haven't put them back. If you do have that problem how do you deal with it? I loved watching the birds and I know the cat I have now would love it too but I can't handle the rats. Living in the hills I have to deal with them enough. Bunny, my new rescue baby has some weird quirks. Every single time the vacuum is used, she runs to her bowl and eats. Every damn time. It's so funny. When the vacuum is turned on, she runs to the doorway between the kitchen and living room and waits, as soon as the vacuum starts moving she runs in the kitchen and eats. She does other weird things but that one is the weirdest. She's such a cutie.