We usually do a big family thing at my uncle's (though it's been smaller in recent years; a few years ago it was only 9 of us, plus my cousin's elderly cat who couldn't be left overnight, and his son who slept through dinner). My mom told him over a month ago that we wouldn't be coming. My parents are making dinner, and my brother and I will go, and we will eat in the living room where we can be further apart, and wear masks when we're not eating (same as we did for my dad's birthday last week). I assume Christmas will be the same. And I usually go to my friend's for New Year's Eve, and it's mostly just us and her husband and 2 kids, but I think I will probably stay home this year.
According to the map here, all but one county in NJ is red. Most of the country is red.