Uncle Benzene

Oh, for the love of...

I'd actually throw down a few bucks for this calendar: January: RAAAAW chicken! February: Lobster risotto, sans lobster March: Gray, med-well Wellies April: Non-seared scallops May: Trash bin full of wasted pasta (with someone reaching in to pull some back out) June: Blindfolded contestant tasting peanut butter, guessing horseradish July: Jean-Philippe sheepishly bringing a plate back to the pass August: Gordo going full-on apeshit all up in some donkey's face (preferably Van's or Robert's) September: Montage of various VIP celeb guests with bemused/nonplussed looks on their faces October: (Halloween Special) Offal Smoothie! The Official Lunch of Hell's Kitchen November: Pitifully mangled lamb chops of varying doneness and mass, meat drooping limply from bone December: "Now fuck off out of here." It'd be big fun to hang it on my foyer wall and eventually set fire to it.

That would have been my bet initially. Ramsay goes pre-emptively apoplectic because Joy chose to do something she's never done before, so of course it's gonna suck out loud. Then... they... *pause for commercial* actually taste it and... it's... *pause for commercial*... stunning! Well done well done well done. Joy, I'm absolutely amazed. But to me, the previews suggest that Joy will either win barely, or possibly tie Rochelle, and with the top score being only 13 out of 20 (or maybe 14 if Joy wins) Ramsay will decide that none of them were worthy of inclusion in the most amazing Hell's Kitchen calendar and/or a black jacket. So he'll strongly admonish them all to wake up/step up, and he'll *pause for commercial* declare a do-over. Starting... right now! (Didn't the previews show Roc/Paul/Dana still there as the contestants were all back running around in the kitchen?) Yep. I'm calling do-over for the first half of next week, then the Minnie Driver service.

Pamela is the absolute worst. Most of the time. But every now and then, she has a fleeting moment where she's the absolute best. And I can see how Louie is a total sucker for those fleeting moments. It's probably how he sees himself. Lately, watching this show is an awful lot like that stroll through the art gallery though. Way too much like that.

Chloe's Potato Face vs. Heller's Turtle Face: Who ya got?

Oh, for the love of fuck. I don't even know what the hell I'm watching anymore. Suddenly this show, run by arguably the funniest man on the planet, has become the most morose, depressing... For crying out loud, Louis. I can respect and appreciate it for what it is, but the bait & switch factor is just off the charts at this point. Surely it's not my fault that when I tune in to watch Louis CK, I'm expecting to laugh my ass off? Or, at the very least, expecting just a few goddamn yuks? One or two? Is that too much to ask? Is that no longer what you do? Since when did this show turn into Six Feet Under? Jesus, CK. Throw me a fuckin' bone over here. This is not what I signed up for. At all.

Because it's hilarious?

I could be wrong, but I don't think Louis is really making any kind of "statement" about race per se. A long time ago, I read an interview in which he explained that she just happened to be their favorite actress among those who auditioned for the role. Nothing more, nothing less. And that they decided not to let racial continuity stand in the way of casting her. In my opinion Louis and crew deserve credit for that, and for not shying away from the inevitable questions the casting choice would raise (both in terms of the show and in terms of race in general) but I don't think making a point about race was part of the decision, just a side-effect. Similarly, I'm not sure Louis really set out to explore (let alone make a statement about) what does and does not constitute sexual assault/rape with the Amia and Pamela situations. Again, I could be wrong because I haven't read any recent interviews, but I certainly don't think Louis set out to paint Louie as a creep at best and a sexual predator at worst. I'm sure he wasn't blind to the kind of reactions it would certainly generate, and again didn't shy away from that. But, again, I think it's more of a side-effect of the storytelling choices he's made, as opposed to the point of them.

DirecTV's Audience Network started running 24 (hopefully in its entirety) a few weeks ago, 3 episodes per week (Tue/Wed/Thu.) Day 2 just started this week. I've been DVRing them and re-watching for the first time since they originally aired. I'm surprised by how much I had forgotten. With the exception of big things I know are coming, it's very much like I'm watching it (again) for the first time. Still so, so much crazy-ass fun. Posting some random observations for my own amusement... --I'd forgotten how much I absolutely loved George Mason. Xander Berkeley rocked the shit out of that role. George and Mike Novick were my favorite characters in the early days, and on re-watch, they still are. --Can't wait for Sexy Evil Nina to surface. --Bearded Jack(!) looked even more badass/deadly than usual in S2 E1. I had a sad when he shaved. Bearded George was a good choice as well. I'm also grateful that, unlike Day 1, Kiefer no longer looks like he just stepped off the set of The Lost Boys. --Speaking of Day 1, man, for as much crap as Kim (rightfully) took/takes for being so incredibly annoying, I don't think she held/holds a candle to Teri on the annoyance scale. I don't know if anybody comes lose to Teri. Ugh. Thanks, Nina! --Had forgotten that on Day 2, Eric Balfour was out and Sara Gilbert was in. Odd choice. --Holy guest/recurring HITG on Day 2! Most of whom I wasn't familiar with at the time, but came to love later, and now my mind is being blown regularly on re-watch as they appear. Billy Burke! Tracy Middendorf! Michelle Forbes! John freakin' Terry! Alan freakin' Dale! Daniel Dae Kim! Kevin Dillon! Anyway, after all these years, I still just can't get enough of this damn show. I might have to (finally) get the DVDs, because it has reeled me right back in and one L.A.D. + three from the early days per week is juuuust enough to make me all twitchy that there isn't just a little bit more. Grrrr. Dammit, Chloe! (Err... Paula!)

Mike Novick!

Please don't cave, Louie. Please. Do not cave.

Depends on your definition, I guess. By my own, I'd say "not very." He's a Philly guy who has worked in NOLA on and off for a few years. Here's a short bio on the web site of the NOLA place where he currently works: http://www.atchafalayarestaurant.com/about/ I have no doubt that he can cook (his current place gets really good reviews, and putting in 6 years at Emeril's flagship is nothing to scoff at) and I'm pulling for him, but he REALLY stumbled out of the gate here. Between what you mentioned, and making a "boudin ball" out of rice, pork loin and andouille (which I'm sure was tasty, it just was in no way a "boudin ball"... boudin balls are made out of boudin, a sausage, not andouille, which is a whole different kind of sausage) it was not at all a good first impression from an "authenticity" standpoint. On the other hand, I suspect that nobody (judges included) has a single fuck to give about actual authenticity. Just the illusion of it. Furthermore, I'm not even sure anybody (judges included) even knew enough to have picked up on either of those faux pas in the first place.

Late to the party here, just now realizing there's a forum for this show. Nice. Hi everybody. Just chiming in on Kronberg here. Couldn't agree more with all the criticisms of his opening bit, especially in context of this particular show, with such a small amount of time to "get over." Truly ill-advised, not a particularly strong joke either. In his defense (such as it is) by its nature it's a bit you can only do at the beginning of a set. Clearly he should have chosen a different bit though for this show. I also though Roseanne was a little over the top with her disdain. Anyway, with Comedy Central's The Half Hour set to premiere shortly, last season's episodes are currently available On Demand (via DirecTV in my case) and being as I didn't watch last season, I DVR'd them all yesterday. Kronberg was one of them. I didn't even make the connection until he started his set with the same silent bit. It went over a whole lot better that time (which might have been part of why he thought it'd go over well on LCS too) and I thoroughly enjoyed the rest of his half-hour set. After watching that, I'd assert that Kronberg's main problem was that he stepped into a big steaming pile of "Do Not Piss Roseanne Off"

I kept waiting/hoping for Louie to erupt into something along the lines of "For fuck's sake, quit manipulating me already. I understand what you're saying, but you can't guilt someone into being attracted to you." She deserved every bit of the "No, you're not laying this on me, figure it out" treatment that Louie gave Doug Stanhope.

Heh. It's extremely "flustrating." A little less so ever since Beth was eliminated and I no longer have to try to figure out whether Kashia is referring to Bev or "Beff." And now that Bev's gone too, all the better. Small victories. Still flustrating though. Ugly-Cry Lady can fuck off out of here at her earliest convenience as well.

Ha! You missed the best part, chessiegal. Katie's offering was (I kid you not) day-old donuts reheated on a panini press with a dollop of Nutella for dipping. They swooned. Edited to add: I think my favorite part of the show is catching Geoffrey Zakarian's (frequent) eye-rolls at stuff like that.

I'm just glad my own Machine is smart enough to keep track of which week in a given month a new PoI episode will be airing, and sends me the number. Sheesh.

Ah, Holli and Blue Jay. *shudder* That's season 7, iamdog.

I suppose I shouldn't be surprised that the contestants don't know the difference between a croque monsieur and a croque madame, but I was STUNNED by the SHOCKING revelation that Ramsay apparently doesn't know the difference either.

"Nice upgrade there, bro. And I know just the perfect way to test its capabilities. Hold on a sec... Joffrey! Oh Joffrey! Could we have a word?" EXTREME JOFFREY-SLAPPIN'!

Sterling Archer Ben Linus Alec Hardison JR Ewing Rosa Diaz

Back during the (seemingly interminable) winter hiatus, I got myself polar vortexed. Didn't even put on pants for like 5 days. High five! Fortunately, all my utilities came through it like a champ, but the ole DVR was empty and nothing much new was airing. To the Netflix! I've never been a zombie guy, a horror flick guy, definitely not a comics guy. So I never had the slightest interest in watching The Walking Dead, despite several signs that I probably ought to go ahead and give it a shot. Namely: 1. As mentioned by Dougal, AMC has built up an awful lot of cred with me via Breaking Bad and Rubicon. (Edited to add: I also greatly enjoyed the much-maligned Low Winter Sun. Lennie James, bitches!) 2. At this point, if Chris Hardwick is hosting an aftershow, that's pretty much automatic POINTS!!! in the show's favor. 3. A couple of friends had mentioned that "It's not what you'd expect from zombie fare. There's a significant LOST element to what they've got going on." Which always piques my interest and causes me to reflexively raise my left eyebrow, even though usually when people say that, they're so very wrong. In this case though, I came to understand what they meant by that, and I agree. I was hooked about 10 minutes into the pilot, and never looked back. As is so often the case, I feel fortunate to have been able to binge watch the first time through. I suspect it helped greatly. Having followed along with the episode threads over at TWoP (and the TWD thread at a non-TV message board I frequent) as I watched, I found myself being far less annoyed by some of the slower parts and other things that apparently annoyed the living crap out of legions of people who were watching as it originally aired. I credit binge watching for that, because in reading the comments, I frequently found myself saying "Yeah, that would have bothered me too if I'd had to wait a week (or 6-8 months) to move on from it, and I know that's true because LOST." Got myself all caught up over those 5 days, and now I'm experiencing all the angst and frustration and excruciating anticipation of the rest of the as-it-airs crew. Fortunately for me, I'm living vicariously through a couple friends I convinced to follow in my footsteps, and are currently early in season 2. With it all still relatively fresh in my mind due to my only having walked that path just a few weeks ago, their emails and texts and the face to face conversations are especially gratifying. "So you guys finally met Herschel, eh? How about THAT guy?" Good times. Good times.

Agreed. I've always been fascinated by Rick and Carl's relationship. They seem to be perpetually in different places mentally/emotionally, there's this everpresent wall between them, and no matter how hard they try to chip away at it, it never really comes down. They have their moments every now and then, a good example from this episode would be the farming bits in the flashbacks. But just as they're "getting there" the Gov comes along and screws that all up. I've always thought that, at the root of it, is that Carl "has a whole lot of Shane in him." I think Carl's brain just works a lot more like Shane's than Rick's. And of course there's the typical dad/son stuff, zombie apocalypse or no. Rick (quite rightly) considers it his fatherly duty to, as best he can, allow Carl to have something resembling a childhood. To "keep him innocent" and whatnot. Herschel reminded Rick of that in the flashbacks, and Rick heeded the advice. But, initially anyway, Carl was having none of it. Screw Legos, what do you mean put down the gun, etc. Kids usually tend to want to "grow up" a hell of a lot faster than their parents want them to anyway, and the "realities" of the ZA only exacerbate that, especially for Carl specifically. Add in Shane's influence, his encouragement/mentoring re: Carl's "manning up" which is like crack to a little boy, etc. And presently, we've got Rick thinking he's failing Carl, and that Carl's disappointed in (or even disgusted by) him after all the savagery he just experienced. Meanwhile Carl's thinking he's failing Rick by not being that innocent little boy Rick wants him to be. They clearly love each other, and nobody's "at fault" really. But as hard as they both try, that disconnect between them just won't go away (at least not completely, and not for long.) They just can't ever seem to get themselves on the same page.

Line of the night, for me, goes to Darryl. "I knew they were bad. But they had a code. It was stupid." I chuckled.

I wish I could hate this show. I really do. I know I should. I've known that from day one. I feel like I ought to take a shower after every episode. There's really nothing much left to see here anyway. It's the same thing season after season, episode after episode - hell, segment after segment. Awful people being awful at life. Alas, I just can't help myself from being endlessly amused by Gordon Ramsay just being a dick. That's all this show is, all it's ever been, for me. And I'll be damned if that alone isn't enough to keep me thoroughly entertained, despite everything.