RealReality

I think Sheree brought it up first...which I thought was pretty low. I agree with you about Kenya being in denial. But I think its very sad, and I think its that sort of reasoning.....this idea that a woman is somehow "at fault" for an abusive relationship...that will keep her from telling anyone when he does hit her. Society does tend to judge women for staying in these relationships, even if our judgment is with their best interest at heart. And while I don't agree with Kenya's methods, these shows are all a powder keg of women fighting and bickering. Almost every trip ends up with some sort of conflict. Many of which get super heated. I don't think its the way normal people operate, but there it is. Production is busy creating situations and hoping for that powder keg explosion that justifies spending money on the trip. I would probably want to know that if such a heated conflict does arise that there won't be someone there that is going to react violently.....no matter how mean, heated and angry the words are. I also think that the conversation got off to a terrible start because Phaedra told Kenya that Porsha wanted to tell them all about anger management. And never relayed that back to Porsha. Frankly, I don't know why it was such a giant secret since at least one of her "sessions" was filmed for the show. But either way, Porsha's insistence that she was in the right for her violent behavior isn't a sign that she has made any progress or change. I don't even think Kenya initially came at her that hard, because as far as she knew Porsha wanted to talk about it. Furthermore, Porsha may want to consider who the fake friend really is. Phaedra told Kenya Porsha's business, knowing that they don't get along. She also pretty much set Porsha up to be ambushed since she told Kenya that Porsha wanted to tell "all the girls" about it.

I'm sorry for her :( I imagine it will all be tied up in trust until he is of age.

So much in this episode 1. I think Todd was straight up fired/laid off, whatever. As stupid as Porsha is, she should know better than to fall for that line of BS. He just randomly quit his job because it was "her or me?" 2. I'd also like to see the receipts for Todd's "lobbyist job," I've always found it suspicious. You're a high powered DC lobbyist, working behind the scenes, and you thought it would be a good idea to be on a trashy reality show? You are raking in all this dough as a DC lobbyist, but you don't have your own apartment in the city? You can't even rent an airbnb? You are working for a Trump supporter, and you didn't realize he might have a problem with you being on a reality TV show? 3. I like Phaedra when she is being real. And, even if she is somehow scamming money from her foundation, I'm still happy that she is bringing recognition to the continued plight of those involved in the Flint water crisis. Its easy to forget about the victims. 4. The irony of Porsha having a physical problem because there isn't enough blood going to her brain. Its just too rich. even though, I have my questions about how burned out she really was with a face full of makeup on. At least do a natural makeup job and not 4 pounds of eyeshadow if you want me to buy it. 5. I'm not sure if Kenya is scared or not, but she got one thing right -- Porsha still has a problem if she thinks that her responding with physical violence at the reunion was okay. And she clearly does. So I guess that "anger management coach" was all for show. She has the exact same problems she ever had, and she will continue to have them, because she is violent. 5b. The problem with Porsha's position is that anything, any argument, any disagreement can be construed as "provocation" for a violent person. This is why there needs to be a line in the sand that you don't respond to words with violence, not even being pointed at. No one should have to walk around eggshells with low IQ Porsha because she doesn't understand how to use her words. 6. I think Sheree was the first person to say that Kenya "provoked" Matt into kicking in her garage, and Kenya came back with "well we all provoke people and you do too Sheree" and pointed out the abusive relationship. Which Sheree didn't deny. 7. As much as I'm a fan of Kenya, she lost me with "at least he doesn't hit me!" Girl, he hasn't hit you....yet....maybe....but he'll get there, and you're not a hero just because a violent man hasn't put his hands on your yet. 8. I also wasn't down with Kenya running after Porsha, I have no idea why she did it...likely to be part of the storyline, or maybe to see if Porsha had changed. Newsflash, Porsha has not changed. 9. I noticed that Porsha wasn't about to play those games with Kandi, she just got right up and left. And honestly, maybe its in Porsha's best interest to just do Dish Nation, and pursue other career paths and leave RHOA. If she gets involved in another violent incident, it could end up affecting other career opportunities she may have.

I dont think that guy was a server. I thought he was working the dishes/cleaning.

So much this!! Although there was no excuse, IMO for that slow clap. John was clearly at the end of his role when he said "fine if that's how you want to win" and so it was just another instance of katsuji kicking someone when they are down. It's just uneccesssary, spiteful and mean. I don't think there is any noble, competitive intention behind it because he does it with people he doesn't really need to do it with. You dont need to "knock Emily off her game" she sucks. You dont need to "knock John tesar off his game", the challenge is over and one of you is going home. If you want to knock someone off their game, they have to have game first. So why isn't he trying this shit with Brooke or Casey or Sylvia when they have been in the bottom?

yeah, the profit margin for jub balls seems sky high :P

I thought it was extra precious, as he shittalked JT for being a 1970's chef that didn't do much work, but wanted to ride on the effort of his team for success.....when that was pretty much what Katsuji wanted to do.

I can't figure out if Julie is trying to grow a backbone or become more reality TV friendly. I don't know how Juliet could ever make a good group of friends anywhere. Her idea of friendship seems to be to be second in command to the queen bee, which isn't a real friendship since its just based on her sucking up. Any shot she might have at a real friendship gets messed up because she is willing to throw any "friend" under the bus to secure her place as runner up queen bee. She seems like the worst, and I don't blame Marissa one bit for separating herself from Juliet. Bad news for Juliet -- when Caroline S leaves she probably won't have any friends or get invited anywhere. Good news for Juliet -- in the unlikely event this show gets a 4th season, Juliet will likely be cast as queen bee over a bunch of Bravo rented friends and will go up against Julie or Caroline F.

I think so. If they win, hero Katsuji with three dishes can take all the credit (even though the other chefs had to do a lot of his work) If they lose either FOH or EC goes home. Katsuji gets spared because he took on so much work doing three dishes while everyone else was just being a lazy asshole.

Have the chefs ever gotten booted out of the kitchen once they get to black jackets? How did everyone fail running the pass. Kimberly seems like a nice enough woman, but no way was she going to win. Well,.at least paulie is free to pursue a love affair with Andrew in his free time.

I think Katsuji felt like he was the team leader as well, since I believe he said he "gave" John the EC position because he had so much experience. It wasn't "the team decided that John should be EC for reasons x, y, and z"

I was a little curious about what made the benches so much more acceptable at the second place.

This is true. I sort of just wish they had let her stick to her dish. I think I understand why they didn't, but it would have been nice to see her get a few "wins"

And this would be my problem with Yandy. Everytime she gets on her high horse and sticks that ring in their face and acts like she is superior because she is "the wife," I get annoyed. Girl, marrying a man who has two other baby mommas is no great accomplishment. You didn't discover the cure for cancer, hell, you didn't even come up with a new condom flavor. All you did was marry a criminal who had other kids. You want a fucking pat on the back for that? I've seen Prison Wives, and you do not need to be a 10 to get into that club boo. And....you're not even married to the man, so wtf?

I would think that perhaps she signed a contract to be on the show before she learned how difficult her pregnancy would be, or that her hot dog shop was going to go belly up. The show would have been good exposure for the hot dog shop, the same way it is good exposure for Mapperton (but much, much better exposure for Scottish castles!)

Such a classic move. If Katsuji's dishes went well, he could take all the credit for his dishes, and not give any credit to anyone for helping him, even though he clearly needed a lot of help. Trust and believe, had they won and those dishes were executed well, you wouldn't have heard a peep from Katsuji about how much help the other chefs gave him. But in the event of a loss, Katsuji could blame everyone else for not helping him enough and hope that he got credit for taking on three dishes. Its funny, Katsuji kept insisting that he wanted Mexican food, and was upset when they didn't go with Mexican.....and then proceeded to do two Mexican dishes anyways. I think it would have been much, MUCH easier if they had just planned to serve every dish to every table family style. I'm not sure if they could do that, but to me, it would just make life much, much easier. This! I felt the same way, it was very offputting, but I couldn't really figure out why In the words of Rose Nylund "I can't put my finger on it, but if I could, my finger would stink!" I didn't mind Emily's mini fit. She was in a pretty tough spot, constantly in the bottom, and Jaime just gave up elimination so she could stay. I know she wanted to prove something, and that has to be harder if you're making a dish you don't really know versus one that you know you can execute successfully. I was happy that she just rolled with it, even if the dish came out sort of shitty.

I don't think I've ever hoped for a double elimination as much as I did this episode. I don't like John Tesar, and I don't think he has changed as much as he thinks he has. He is still a manipulative shit. From what I could see, he wanted the ego boost of being EC, he wasn't doing Katsuji any favors. "Sheldon has won RW, and I've never done a RW.....but I should be EC for this challenge" I don't like Katsuji either, and his "head games" just sounded like an excuse to be a raging asshole to people. There was no need to play headgames with Emily the night after elimination. And while I can't stand JT, either engage him or let him be. Sarcastic handclapping when someone is sincerely frustrated is just mean spirited. Unpopular opinion....but I don't hate Emily. And I was really happy that the judges had something nice to say about something that she made. It must be hard to be on the bottom all the time, and still have the drive to try to make good food. I'm glad Sheldon was able to avoid elimination, any other day he would have been on the block, because his dish was mushy. But seriously....pimento cheese and crab? It doesn't sound terrible, it just doesn't sound very high end at all. I don't know why John thought that was a good idea and why he only did one dish.

She is also defending him on television and minimizing his behavior. These are things people in abusive relationships do and its part of not calling the cops or getting a restraining order. ESPECIALLY if he is busy telling you that you are responsible for his violent outbursts. I mean, if you just change, he is gonna be so much better, so no need for cops and a restraining order. If dinner was just hot when he got home.... Im almost certain this is why he refused to talk to her with the crew there. He didnt want anyone else to hear the guilt trip he was gonna lay on her and how she is really responsible for his violence.

This is true. But you had said that if kenta really didnt want matt there she coukd have told production. However we dont know that she didnt tell production. Yeah, i think any level of violence is a different story. In a toxic relationship you may have two people using the same weapons on an even playing field. Violence changes that, most often it is not only abusive, but its intimidation and fear. So, to me, its not on the same level. And violence on an object is still violence, especially in this situation where it is done to cause fear and intimidation. And yeah, if youre a person who doesnt know how to use your words you need to learn to walk away. And that goes for men and women. Not try to argue that its not your fault because someone was using really mean words.

Julie's "toast" would have been so much more effective had she said something to the effect of: "Caroline, life has thrown so many challenges at you this year, but you've handled it all with such grace and dignity. I know that after all you've faced this year, the next chapter of your life in Dubai will be a joyful success, and that the strength I so admire will come in handy when dealing with all their rules. And I hope if I ever have to deal with the trials and tribulations you've dealt with this year I can do so with the strength and confidence that you have shown."

His flight was cancelled and no one made arrangements to buy him another ticket. Not production, not peter. To me, it gets no clearer than that. I have no idea if he was really contractually obligated to be there. And if he breaks that contract than what? He simply doesnt get paid for that appearance. Nothing more would happen than that. And he wouldnt be walking right into the "set up" he complains about. Kenya cancelled the ticket, she told peter she didnt want him there, she may have also told production but they couldnt stop him. There is no evidence that production bought him a ticket or anything else to ensure his attendance. If production didnt arrange his trip they may not have known he was going to show up. Im not sure that she secretly wanted him there given that she not only cancelled his ticket, but told peter she didnt want him there. And thats just what we saw, she may have also told production. I do not think they are equally at fault here. I dont think she could have been any more clear in trying to get him to stay away. As for her other actions/behavior i dont think any of it justifies or is on the same level as violence.

Would agree that there is a part of kenya that thrives on attention and drama. But she cancelled his flight and didnt want him there. I cant see how she brought that one on herself. If he knew he was angry, he had every chance to stay away since his flight was cancelled.

I draw a hard line in there being a difference between physical abuse and other forms of unhealthy behavior. Especially in relationships, because the physical abuse is both physical and mental. In toxic/codependent relationships both parties DO play a role in maintaining the unhealthy relationship. So, if was just a toxic relationship, yes, they would both be equally at fault. But whoever escalates up to violence is on a different level. I also think a hard denial by matt is very meaningful in this situation. But playing coy and trying to imply that he was manipulated for a story line just sounds like an abuser hoping to avoid blame. The charge against kenya is that matt didnt do this. If he didnt do this, or he was specifically told to do this he needs to come out and say it. He certainly wasnt social media shy when it came to placing blame for his behavior. So if he didnt do it, if this was a production set up he needs to come out and say it plainly.

I suspect thar at first juliet was a "breath of fresh air." A frank american, keeping it real, telling everyone how it is. Unfortunately i think that gets very old, very quick. And there was probably a kid in the picture before he realized he made a mistake. Im sure he relishes his travels, and it wouldnt surprise me if he had a piece on the side. As for Marissa, it sounds like la is the right move. I think she will love it when she gets out there. I would bet money they end up in santa monica. Someplace that is high end and easy to walk.

I think the crew probably knew about the cameras since they werent hidden. I also dont know how you could blame a deer for shattering three window panes and then shattering your car window. Im sure we have read some of the same literature. And both have observed people in abusive relationships. I have a friend right now, and it just doesnt matter what this guy does, she is quick to minimize it. I try not to be harsh with her, because i dont want her to shut me out when this guy finally hits her. And sadly, i know thats where its headed. So, we both understand minimizing the abusive behavior and how different an abused woman will treat an abuser versus anyone else on the street. Im very, very sorry that you went through that. And im happy that you were able to break free from your abuser. I know that takes a strength that is hard.