Drogo

Did I follow right, were these like his prison sugar mamas who kept him in ramen packs and fresh Fruit of the Loom? Maybe Taylurr should encourage these relationships to keep the lights on.

We went to a “sprinkle” (2nd kid shower) with the build-her-library theme. Six Goodnight Moons. I’m partial to an illustrated children’s dictionary.

Andddddd more fakes. It might be time to part ways with this clunker show.

This, and her eternal RBF. She looks so irritated when the guys gravitate towards girls who actually appear interested.

I just kept thinking about how fucking pungent his feet must have smelled, barefoot in leather loafers. Tool.

Remember when Park and Morgan were on this show? I miss them.

Ciara seems annoyed that Sam isn’t respecting a Kory boundary that was never discussed with her.

Carl: “Go into the girls rooms and take something you think they’ll need.” Chris: *grabs iridescent orange boots* Gabby is trying to make fetch happen. Ciara just doesn’t like her. Exhibit A: the hug she gives Sam when she arrives for the western party vs the bullshit hug she gives Gabby Immediately after. Sam needs to stop getting on the kitchen counter with her outside shoes. So gross. Otherwise, she’s my favorite new person in a while. Spitting truths about supporting partners battling demons and the best part: “If Danielle’s friendships need alcohol to survive, that says something else about her friendships.” It’s actually kind of sad to see how Danielle just falls for the sudden and likely temporary attention she’s getting from Paige and Amanda. “I go to bat so hard, I’m such a good friend!” Gretchen Weiners type shit. They don’t like you, they don’t think your jokes are funny, your real friend hasn’t abandoned you, just stop. Amanda repeating what Paige said about “Danielle’s light shining” as if it came out of Danielle’s mouth instead, annoying. Paige: “I can’t WAIT to tell Craig everything that happened this weekend!” They’re all 14. Someone tell me how Kory thought he was driving 100 miles in 20 minutes.

Kamie is beautiful, charming and witty. Nev is… Nev.

Wendy Pepper was my favorite on S1 (and RIP) but— It’s actually Wendy Peppercorn, like Wendy Peffercorn (The Sandlot dreamgirl/lifeguard.) https://youtu.be/Idk6yzGt4DE

When she laughs, Nicole’s mouth puckers up like a little old lady. Hee.

I think all the women in their family do.

Exactly. Talk when you’ve calmed down, you two toddlers.

I hope these two brought a lot of makeup.

The advice is solid. Talking while you’re angry (and as dumb as these two) won’t accomplish anything.

But, he really thought he was gonna win!

Big Ma comin’ through with the Big Wisdom. And five hundy.

“Sister Mary Clarence comes to us from a somewhat progressive convent.”

$15-18. Not bad.

Kris looking at luxurious plate of local delicacies: “OMG eww so gross I’m not putting that in my mouth nuh uh no way” Jeymi honey… The best people I’ve met in this world have one thing in common: they will put almost anything in their mouths. Run, baby girl.

Also they probably hadn’t anticipated the namesakes being dragged through the mudsakes. If I go to a restaurant and they give me five and a half French fries with my $50 steak, I’m burning the fucking place down.

And it didn’t start here. This isn’t the first time we’re seeing the blatant disdain for what seems to be a perfectly healthy and happy relationship. Even at the beginning, it was “oh but what day in October were they officially together” and bla bla bla “Austin’s dick.” So… It has nothing to do with drinking or lack thereof, or how fast they’re moving, or her losing herself, none of it. Personally I think it has something to do with Carl being widely acknowledged (by several of them, and others) that Carl is the best (ahem) “kisser.” Suddenly he’s never looked better, has his shit together, isn’t raging every weekend, is still the best in bed (probably even more so now since the only vice he’s held onto is sex) and stupid selfish Lindsay scooped him up. How very dare she. Petty and salty. Palty? This show would benefit so much from The Real World format of “every season, brand new cast.”

Major difference being: someone is offering to give Katie her money back.

Because she’s not serious about converting. She said she had never heard him pray before and his beautiful voice during prayer was another way he’s full of surprises. HE PRAYS FIVE TIMES A DAY, NICOLE. THIS IS NOT A SURPRISE, GIRLYPOP. She also seems to think every bulletpoint on the religious code of conduct is a targeted attack against her and that if her husband just loved her enough these things would stop mattering to all of Islam. How dare he not want to answer her 500th ridiculous question of the day which he’s probably answered a thousand times before.

Sham and Phillip- that was the fakest shit that’s ever faked. No Academy Awards will be handed out tonight.