Yours Truly

I've said it before Ben is NOT cute. He has the attributes but they have come together in a weird creepy way. I really don't understand what "HOTNESS" factor has these chicks stuck on stupid.

Yep! I do have to agree that there is a noticably absent amount of help for the chef this season. Enough that it does stand out a bit. I mean there have been numerous seasons where, maybe not every charter, but a number of charters, where you see the chief stew request assistance from the deck crew to wash dishes, serve and there have been times where you have had standing instructions to check in with chef if possible to see if he may need extra hands in the kitchen during dinner prep and/or service. Granted it isn't an official duty but over the seasons and franchises it's been something that's been offered depending on what's been happening with the chef, or the stews in the galley during demanding charters. It is a thing. Enough of a thing that when we as viewers see the chef struggling we automatically wonder how the crew is going to chip in to help (at least I do) so seeing it not happen in this instance does raise a bit of an eyebrow.

You point out what I think is most relevant and you make it pretty easy to understand.

Maybe, but I'm sure most of it was from getting her head slammed against a table. But you know, being able to throw verbal blows is all worth it. Am I right??? LOL.

And I find that weird. This whole completely blameless angle is intriguing to me. I think if you participate in ANY way you're making a stupid decision. On BOTH sides. To each their own.

Its crazy how hard some want to make this a myth or something. I mean stay blessed I guess cause I've never lived a day in my life thinking I could get into some verbal altercation with someone without at least considering the possibility of it escalating to something physical. I mean interactions and altercations DO escalate or am I missing something?? LOL. It's not some folk tale from some far off place and yet it does constantly get described as such. SMH

I mean everyone has the right to take foolish chances. There seems to be this huge focus on the blame side of the aftermath where my points are centered on the true tramatic side of the aftermath. The injury, the harm, the pain and long term effects. Knowing the person is going to jail for 5 minutes isn't enough to sooth the stitches, the bruises, the cuts, the nightmares, the PTSD. At least not for me. Plus the ugly behavior I'm trying to give myself permission for isn't exactly worth the outcome. Hmmmmm, being a rude, childish bitch with a slick mouth is so important to me that the chances of me getting roughed up is absolutely worth it. That's the non logic that has me stratching my head. Also, Rlb8031 last couple of posts sums everything up so nicely and perfectly. It's about understanding just how unpredictable people can be so it is also in someone's self interest to keep that in mind before deciding that being verbally abusive isn't always the best option.

Again with the laws. It's more about the gravity of the consequence for not taking care. I know that it's in my best interest to be mindful and careful when crossing the street even though I would expect a driver to do everything in their power to not hit pedestrians. My point is that I also have a responsibility to MY OWN safety and throwing myself in front of oncoming traffic without first seeing if its clear is a dumb and reckless thing to do. Same way a person should be mindful of what sort of atmosphere there are creating for themselves when engaging is distasteful behavior among others. Basically there's 50/50 chance shit won't go your way. Right or wrong its still boils down to it being a Roll of the dice. I personally think it's a stupid risk to take. But that's just me.

"well they'll go to jail" "being physical vs. verbal will get you in more trouble" What people seem to forget is that people lose it. No rhyme or reason. That high horse isn't going to keep a person out of the hospital. Erratic behavior isn't some rare compulsion. It's a real and common thing. I mean road rage happens and it's the most bizarre thing you can witness but it's not unheard of or some once in a blue thing. That right there shows us that people can just have sparatic episodes of emotional distress where reason and good judgement go out the window. It's better to be safe than sorry and going around wanting to test random people on their emotional discipline for shits and giggles is just such a mindboggling pass time to me. Just sayin'.

LOOOOOVVVEEE THIS!! Yeah, I grew up in the Bronx so I don't see my take on things as defending or justifying it but more like a public service announcement. LOL. I mean, its crazy to me how people really do simplify these matters. Yes, it's wrong to lay hands, OBVIOUSLY but I mean people still will depending on the circumstances and to ignore that detail when choosing how to interact is just plain ole foolish. People want to be "right" so bad, but to me it ain't really about right and wrong it's about smarts and playing it safe. I get that it's wrong but I'm also going to be mindful about the fact that people do wrong shit all the time so I can't COUNT on someone NOT reacting a certain way so it makes sense to just not engage in childish verbal assaults.

Well I EXPECT a car not to hit me as I'm crossing the road because well hello, pedestrian right of way and all that plus it's not cool to kill someone with you car but that doesn't mean I don't TAKE CAUTION when crossing the road. There is a certain amount of responsibility that a person has to NOT be careless and just toss themselves into oncoming traffic. A certain responsibility to want to AVOID hazardous situations that have the potential to cause harm. To be reckless in a sense that you are purposely engaging in questionable behavior DESIGNED to create a volatile atmosphere is what I find fault with. We can wax poetic all day long about how "it's never okay, yada yada, yada" but its not some well hidden secret that some people will get physical for behavior like that. So why take the chance? Chastising it doesn't change it and I for one am not going to wade in dangerous waters just because technically I can and people who do throw caution to the wind and take such gambles don't get much sympathy from me cause the same way it's supposed to be so easy to keep hands to oneself its even easier to choose ones words carefully. To put it simply. Don't start none, won't be none.

I still think it's crazy how people STILL want to push the narrative that being antagonized, belittled, disrespected in a confrontational and combative manner (cause some of Candiance interactions have been rather nasty and aggressive) is some no biggie, pish posh, shrug away type of moment. YES, the text book response it to be "above it all" but emotions DO have a play in these matters and as "behaved" as everyone EXPECTS people to be that just ain't realistic. People stay stuck on the right and wrong side of it but I personally would rather be on the side that won't have me knocked upside my head because I pushed the wrong button that day. All that righteous support Imma have from people saying that person was wrong to lay hands on me ain't gonna change the fact that now I'm dealing with the pain and humiliation of a huge ugly knot on my head. Like come on now. Lol. My thing is, why are we advocating so hard for people to be aggressively, intimidating and calculating with no remorse or consequence? I can easily say, in the same breath that X was wrong for putting hands and A was wrong for antagonzing. I don't know about anyone else but I feel like the people that go so hard about physical retailiation are those that want to be rude, nasty and mean to people but don't want to have to worry about someone acting out on them cause you know, "I'm only using my words to cut and hurt you." I just can't stand the defense of ugly people, whether they are physical or verbal abusers. Abusers are abusers and I hate the safe haven that is created for verbal abusers when only one side gets the stigma. It's ridiculous all the way around.

I'm honestly glad that Candaice is off the show. I really am not fond of that woman but at the same time I can't stand GEB. Ashley isn't that bad cause her role is as obvious as a costume and to be honest she really doesn't "put her chest" into any of it. Her participation really is superficial and as damaging as some of her pot stirring is I'm never that bothered with her involvement. Now don't get me wrong, she's gotten on the nerves and her indifference to causing trouble is annoying and rude but at the same time since it's par for the course on these reality shows I just can't get myself too worked up about what basically boils down to her doing her job. But yeah, I think one of the main reasons why Candaice gets soooooo much heat from the cast, the viewers, etc. is because she's ALWAYS at a 9. I can't stand Robyn or Gizelle but Candiace and Wendy get on my nerves for other reasons as well. There never seems to EVER be any lighthearted moments with Candiace or Wendy. Even when they are in neutral mode and getting their filming in they OOOOOOZEEE disdain. Not saying they don't have reason to feel how they feel but I mean if you can't even get through filming without sitting their stank faced, pressed and bothered then why even bother? Not saying that the GEB don't have their moments either but this is a show. They are forced to be in the same room on multiple occassions and throughout the season you can FEEL IT through the screen how disgusted Wendy and Candiace are AT ALL TIMES. Candiace doesn't win supporters because she taunts too much. I sorry to say, as valid as her complaints are with regards to the cast it just ain't entertaining TV to see a smirking, taunting, fake unbothered chick, but hella pressed in any segement you tune in to cast member. I'm not saying she should have to play nice all the time but unfortunately if you're choosing to CONTINUE with this toxic set up then it would behoove you to take a sip of the fake keke kool aide in order to get through at least SOME of the filming schedule without it always being about how you're the victim. Now I know it'll probably be said that SHE HAS "played nice" but not really cause in those instances she is constantly making it clear, with her body language, facial expressions, tone and delivery that everything coming out of her pores is pure repulsion for having to be in the same camera shot as the others. It's the air that she's above the show as a whole and it really shows how much she feels above the others (with good reason). It's just not good for the show because it's annoying. If you don't like it that much then girl bye. Which Candiace finally decided to do. Thankfully. Candaice presence is straight condescention for the others and Candiace makes it a point to have that front and center at all times and all it's done is create this heavy atmosphere in every scene. Again, Candiace has EVERY reason to bring that energy cause they deserve it but when it sucks the life out of every filmed scene then it really does drag down the viewing experience. Unfortunately Gizelle manages pretty regularly to have light moments and enjoyable banter throughout the show so it's not always doom, gloom and anger. I do understand that Candiance can't be as lighthearted because she has so much aimed at her regularly but her fake bounce back and fake, lets film face isn't convincing and just doesn't work. I dislike that that's the recipes for these shows but there you have it. Candiace has recognized that she can't play that game effectively and has parted ways as she should.

EXACTLY! Chris was addressing it in a nutshell. He. Has. Never. Met. The. Women. Period! I took that to mean that he has had nothing to do with her. Nothing more needs to be said. Chris wasn't going to customize his response to whatever new drivel Robyn was spouting cause it's all just a bunch of bullshit to begin with so no Chris doesn't need to tailor his responses exactly and specifically to any and all iterations of the rumor Robyn is speaking on. The whole rumor has been thrown away and the GEB haven't gotten the memo. Plain and simple.

I mean the straight audacity of Robyn piping up like that had my jaw on the floor. No this brainless twit did not gleefully try and legitamize the ramblings of some random crackpot who lied, retracted and then claims to have lied about the retraction. This woman has not one iota of sense rolling around in that head of hers. Add the next part where they made it clear that the woman claimed profusely that Gizelle was not involved KEPT my jaw on the floor. Oh, okay she's credible in those parts put not the parts where she retracts her initial allegations. It's the confidence in their attempts that has me all the way dumbfounded. Lord take the wheel!

I found it hella crazy how Robyn and Gizelle took bites out of that ridiculous allegation towards Chris. Robyn pointedly asking Chris about a "photoshopped screenshot" and when Chris shut it down quick because AHEM, Andy's card started AND ended the accusation in one reading because the last sentence mentions the accuser admitting that it was all a lie" the next move was for Robyn and Gizelle to then state the accuser THEN took that back as well as if that meant ANYTHING. But then it gets better when Gizelle says the accuser then goes on to vindicate Gizelle in stating that Gizelle has nothing to do with it. Oh okay so the accuser is believable when absolving Gizelle and retracking her retractment regarding the accusation against Chris but not believable when she admits to lying about the original accusation?? Lord make it make sense!! Sounds to me the accuser just a cray-cray or a plant. Either way the level of weight Gizelle and Robyn try and through on that piece of nonsense information is all kinds of disturbing, distasteful and repulsive. They are just both trash human beings. Period!

Imma sound cold but I truly think that a big chunk of Cat's MO was to play the hurt little bird card as her "in". Cat's a pretty attractive girl and I was actually surprised that she didn't get more attention from the men however this cast has been filled with some rather attractive crew which isn't always the case on this franchise. There is usually a modge podge of "attractive". Maybe one or two "traditionally" attractive then a couple of "eye of the beholder" and then another set of "questionable, depending on the lighting" types. Not this crew. For the most part they are all attractive in a very strong way (although I personally find Ben completely unattractive). I get that he has features that are supposed to be "hot" but he just looks like the wish version of a what's supposed to be a "hot guy". It's like he possesses what is considered attractive traits, but i don't know, It's like each part came from a different "type" of hot guy and then they tried to put it all together and you get word salad but in human form. Anyway, I think Cat was expecting to get some male attention and her quite, shy angle has always worked for her but on this type of boat with such outgoing personalities who are willing to throw themselves into the mix and are up to be the life of the party with no prompting ain't nobody got time to go LOOK for you to hit on when there are three beautiful women already willing and able to party with no prompting. She seemed to remove herself at every outing and every trip to the hot tub. To me it looked like she was waiting for people (most likely the guys) to notice her and make the effort to pull her into the festivities thus making THEM work to include her. Now granted this is definitely a trait that is unfortunate and I'm not taking away how it eventually affected her mental health. I do believe that was real however I do question where it's rooted. I do believe it's made up of insecurities and of course her childhood, don't get me wrong, but there is also an element of manipulation that was completely evident in how she portrayed herself.. Let's put it this way, she had no problem coming out of her shell and trying to check Barbie during that one sit down. That's when I noticed that this chick can turn it on when desired. So, while I do believe that the final product of her being in a poor mental state at the end was authentic I also believe some of it was as a result of not being able to win more attention and interest from the crew (male and female). She kept throwing out SOS's wanting allies and admirers and bff's but found herself the least interesting in a pool of outgoing people and decided that not being pulled into a friend group without really trying was enough to cause her mental distress. Personally, I find that to be a bit much and at risk of sounding could I feel like she did it to herself. I can't help but to feel like some of her episodes came across more like "antics" and little bit like pouting wanting a specific outcome. Anyway I'm glad she's gone cause a reality show isn't the place for someone that needy for attention but then not outgoing enough to garner said craved attention. Bye!

The altercation itself happened between Deborah and K person so the fact that the conversation still swayed over into the famous: "to beat or not beat (Candace), that is the question......" shouldn't have even began but alas...... Anyhoo, I wonder if there will be any more light shed on what has happened in their regard, (Sesame Street and K person), you know like who pressed what charges from what hospital bed and what appointments will be made for all injured parties moving forward. It's going to be interesting who will be the one that had the upper ground in that situation. Not that it matters since it's a whole hot mess all the way around. I guess we will just wait and see.

And some people are willing to take that chance. May seem stupid to some but I sure as hell know not to test the waters when there are so many possible outcomes. It's pretty silly to lean into the text book result being the only result possible when participating in bad behavior. Yeah, sure the right and wrong of it remain the same but the motivating factors carry that much more weight that disrupt the ratio of the RIGHT result being what actually transpires. I love how "pressing charges" is such a battle cry. Okay sure. Press charges from that recovery room while scheduling that follow up appointment and therapy sessions for the trauma. Go right ahead, I guess. LOL The same way the Right and Wrong position thinks it's absolutely foolish to physically retaliate and risk jail and bad publicity The opposite sees the foolishness in risking personal harm and bodily injury for the sake of being meanspirited and hateful using "just" your words. Two sides of the same coin. Ugly behavior is ugly behavior and no one wins.

Well my dislike for Candace is that she also has a very violent nature in these instances that gets overlooked. I can understand and accept the words vs. physical argument. It's when it's used as a cut and dry argument in SOME not ALL of Candace's altercations. I think it's fair NOT to condone the very meanspirited, hurtfulness and downright threatening and aggressive behaviors Candace's has displayed while still pointing out physical violence is not okay. It's the glossing over Candace's very harmful ways that's always stuck in my craw. It is absolutely possible to condemn Candace at the same time as any other party who has behaved badly and the constant acceptance of Candace's nasty hatefulness in the name of "keep your hands to yourself" movement just seems absolutely bizarre to me. Yup, don't put your hands on anyone, but I need the next verse to be and it's also unacceptable to inflict emotional abuse upon others as well. It's the diminishment of importance to one unacceptable act in order to condemn the other is what's always got me baffled. It falls hollow to me. Let's condemn ALL the bad behavior or none at all. I don't think popping Candace in the mouth for the slick shit she says is an acceptable response but in the same token I'm really not going to be broken up about it when it happens. Grown folk can make grown decisions and the aggressor who choose to get physical will deal with their consequences the same way Candace will deal with the consequences of her decisions. Seems fair to me. I mean it is what it is and playing with fire is a saying for a reason.

Thing is, it may sound completely out of the ordinary because lets be honest it is. It really doesn't matter if I still live by the "Talk Shit, Get Hit" mantra cause most people ain't coming across with this trifling ass behavior at this scale on the regular. We aren't encountering these grossly inappropriate and outrageous violations of personal space in the average day. So for those swearing up and done that there are a lot of us making bail on the regular, sorry to bust that bubble. LOL But I will say that it is pretty humorous how often this sentiment creeps up. Some of us express our boundaries and what would be an absolute not in any of these situations. Some of us are also much more honest about it and not trying to present some moral high ground for no reason. Most people will not accept someone in their personal space that its advancing or constantly crossing physical lines during a confrontation. There will be some form of boundary restricting body language which could be in the form of a raised hand in front that can make contact. That's all it takes for a confrontation to turn physical. After that then we're off to the races. Most of these altercations don't just start with an uppercut to the jaw so simplifying it to some random barbaric act on one persons part is just very naive and purposefully obtuse. It's usually a build up of inappropriate behavior all around that includes unacceptable body language and invading personal space with the potential of harm for both parties. My position is that once you involve yourself in a combative confrontation and exhibit aggression and intention to become physical then you are not more innocent than which ever party makes first contact. Point. Blank. Period.

Understood but what I'm talking about is the narrative that Candace ONLY uses her words and that she is NOT physically aggressive because SHE IS. Chris has had to physically restrain her how many times??? Again just because she has never managed to make actual contact in these altercations she's had, doesn't mean she's any better than the one's that do. She's TRIED to so, for me that negates this whole narrative that Candace is a different animal than the ones that actually manage to put hands on. Candace BARELY avoids contact and on more than one occasion has also resorted to physical behavior. She just CAN'T follow through on the act cause either she's getting her ass beat cause they beat her to the punch (literally) or someone has restrained her. The only reason we ain't got pound for pound examples of physical violence to hurl at her is because she just isn't capable of actually following through on her aggression, usually because outside factors have gotten in her way. It's the defense that Candace is above because she uses her words and her words only and she actually doesn't. She's advanced on people and has gone for weapons in the past so I'm just challenging the idea that Candace is NOT violent in any way shape or form. Let's stop pretending that this woman hasn't gotten gully and been down to throw down on more than one ocassion.

It cracks me up on how people want to be all it's just words, words, words like verbal abuse and bullying ISN'T a thing. Look I think that altercation was wack a dack and as much as I can't stand Candiace I have to admit that in that instance she really wasn't engaging at all so that whole pop off was ridiculous on everyone's part. Violence is not okay but the obtuseness that people gravitate to when la-la-la'ing about "it's just words" really do make my eyes roll. And let's be clear, that was CANDACE grabbing a bottle with intention or nah???? Candace isn't a beacon of peace and I'm tired of the one sided criticism. It's okay to take the WHOLE situation into account when sharing an opinion like, for example, i can acknowledging that Candace really didn't do all that much for it to escalate into a physical altercation however I do believe this was really about misjudging how much personal space you fixin' to invade tryna DE-escalate something. That's securities job and Ms. K---- ? can't remember her name was a bit too cavalier in her attempt and ended up the one in the brawl. In this case I don't believe anything truly falls on Candace but lets not pretend Candace does not also position herself as an aggressor as well. The only difference is that because Candace is such a punk ass keyboard warrior and shit talker her aggressive side pales to those who retaliate. So just because Candace didn't make contact with anyone using that bottle she grabbed it's all good? Candace never actually gets a chance to deliver her brand of violence cause she just can't not that she doesn't want to. So all this defense of how Candace just uses her words just amazes me because her actual violent side gets completely ignored. And to be clear I think verbal assualt and verbal attacks are not any better than physical violence. Anything aimed to hurt and harm should be frowned upon. Nasty and meanspirited shouldn't be given a pass just because it "never got physical". A co-worker sending unsolicited nudes isn't physical but is still a violation that is absolutely traumatic and unacceptable so lets stop giving Candace all these breaks just because she never manages to make solid physical contact with her targets.

It's done exactly what Kyle wanted it to do. Just the hint of an accusation and now it's an official speculation that just might have some weight behind it. It's absolutely incredible how this type of thing works. Kinda like the Mandela Effect. That's exactly what these housewife shows thrive on. The Mandela Effect. I've finally got the perfect description of this nasty, hateful tactic used by the worse of the worse on these shows. YUCK!!

Not to say that I wouldn't be interested in NEW drama and NEW developments but if it's always going to circle back to House of HIlton, Big Kathy and the villianization of all three when in reality KYLE is the only one actively on the show then that's where I get a bit tuned out and burnt out. I get speaking on the past in some detail whenever they pop up but it's when it circles all the way back to the beginning with the whole big Kathy, childhood drama and dynamic that I start hearing white noise. I enjoy ragging on Kyle in the here and now. I enjoy ragging on Kyle for all the current bullshit she introduces into the show while she herself is filming. I enjoy focusing on whatever drama creeps up during filming. It really isn't necessary to circle ALL THE WAY back to Big Kathy on the way back when machine just to comment or discuss the current dilemmas we see unfold in the here and now. Yeah sure the past contributes and all that jazz but I mean sometimes the real reason behind Kyle and what happened last episode or last season or season one is that Kyle is a hateful person. Full stop. Yeah, I'm really not a Kyle fan. LOL