butterbody

Emo vampire has got to end up coming out as transgender before the season is done. I can't see any other reason they'd focus so much on him.

I'd love to watch a whole show of Leah's meltdown, but I'm not sure I'm prepared to see poor Jace again. I'm watching the scene where Jenelle is crying in the car, and that poor baby tried to comfort her. She says, "he's so mean to me and I didn't do nuthin' wrong" and instead of saying welcome to my world, lady, he starts singing about how the world is a rainbow. I imagine him singing it to himself when he tries to tune out the crazy around him, and my heart hurts. Makes me want to sneak in my sons room and watch him sleep and smell his head. How Jenelle can be so completely void of one shred of maternal instinct, just blows my mind.

Edited because I think I think I'm funnier than I think I am....

Yesterday I took my kid to buy a beta fish. They're so frilly and colorful, but the Petco guy told us they get like that because they're always ready to fight. They put them in separate bowls next to each other and they puff themselves up and try to be intimidating. They live their lives on the defense, ready to brawl to the death. Then Dr.Panda addressed Farrah, and she'd take a deep breath and straighten her posture, and I thought my god, Farrah's a beta!

I really loved the first episode, but last night just felt so contrived. His friends all look like they were plucked from a 90's teen angst movie. The incredibly gorgeous girl who dates a total nerd and has a vampire for a brother are just too much. And annoying sister with the mammoth ears, where in holy hell did you register? Was that some sort of antique shop?

Donald won me over with the best line of the night about how Connor being bullied by society isn't as bad as the bullying he endures at home. Connors dad needed a smackdown of truth, and it was glorious.

Let's not forget him jumping up and standing on the prep table at the end of iron chef. He's a douche.

This is the doucebag who made an entire show out of finding small business owner chef/bakers, and challenging them to a cookoff of their own product. He makes me ill.

I didn't know who Kerri was but her self righteousness made me hate her immediately. "People still drink soda?" "Heart attack on a plate!" Her kids were having a blast eating pizza and playing video games, and as they laughed and cheered, dad is bitching that they're off schedule. What I found curious about Kerri was regardless of her diligence about what goes in her body, her face looks like the 'after' picture on a meth poster. Once they put her in the cheap wig, I thought someone had given a makeover to teen mom April.

What was the pattern on Violet's first dress? I thought I saw boobs or eyeballs, and horizontal bones, and I need someone to explain it to me.

Blargh!!! I just saw the most heinous commercial yet for bryers ice cream. Total silence. Deafening silence, while people eat ice cream. And amidst the silence, a quiet licking/ slurping sound. It goes on forever. It is torture.

Yeah something about some card that earns you points when shopping elsewhere. I kind of missed what they were saying cause I was busy shouting 'bitch'! This wasn't one of those, 'husband turns into a big baby when he's sick' clichés. The dude was toe up. And then at the end he asks if she's wearing new jeans but she can't hear him because she's also wearing her new headphones.

I just saw a commercial for rite aid, where this sickly husband is on the couch and the wife says she'll go get him some medicine. Then this bitch pulls into Macy's and proceeds to try on jeans & buy headphones while her husband is dying back at home.

Heinz was a douche. He was all too happy to admit he lives his life to keep up appearances.

Oh come on, everyone buys a house before seeing it in the daylight, right? Was it me, or did creepy Matt seem annoyed when Leah started to feel better? Like he had planned on making her a little sick bed on the floor to pass out in, while he got Amber's money's worth at the sex hotel? Sofia...nothing that hasn't been said already. At one point she was ripping around the dining room table doing this tooth bearing, panting thing, and I caught myself shuddering and looking away, feeling exactly as I used to when watching the gross eating challenges on fear factor. #freesimon Whomever above said that T&C act as though Carly is merely out on loan was spot on. And because it cannot be said enough- eat a dick, Tyler.

Uuuhhh, guys? Have we had a chance to discuss the giant AMBER tattoo on Matt's forearm?

Is that real world Leroy on the table?

Taylor: She's so excited. She's so... scared.

That was a PAX Vaporizer used for marijuana. There are several vaporizers on the market but pax is the best. I work in a medical marijuana dispensary and we sell them for $250. They are healthier than smoking & give off very little smell. They're awesome!

Such a horrible way to end a fabulous episode! I have a hard time separating these queens from their real life stank personalities. Loved Ginger in the beginning but now she's either "woah is me, I can't sew, I go home each night and cry", or being a catty old bitch with Kennedy. Ugh, enough. And Ru, I beg of you enough with the LA Guardia, O'Hare, Kennedy schtick. Enough! Note to self, if I ever have to lip sync for my life, have a seizure. RIP Katya. You were a great sport and a true talent. Finally: I am a straight woman and yet- I want to have all kinds of sex with violet. I'm so confused....

I thought Nadia's memorial was appropriate as well. I know one of the police consultants on the show. He has been in CPD intelligence in real life for 20 plus years, as was his father before him who was killed in the line of duty. His fathers name was William Luce & his plaque was above Nadia's with his actual end of watch date. It was a beautiful tribute to a true hero, and shows how much respect the show has for the real Chicago PD

I may be confused, and I already deleted from the DVR, but wasn't there a scene where they did try to tell Amelia but she was in surgery, and someone said something about how its protocol that you can't interrupt them during surgery with news like that?

Thanks, I don't know why but I immediately thought, "goes ape shit" and my monthly hormones would go through the roof if I had to endure another of her soliloquies.

What in the holy hell just happened? My DVR cut off at the shot of the cake on the ground. I came here to see what i missed in the final minute only to learn that I missed two additional hours?? I don't watch those other shows! Grrrr. So now I have to on demand Cf & SVU...Can someone tell me in which order they aired?

I am officially old as well, because the hashtags were driving me nuts! Particularly #GrantsRant- BEFORE HE EVEN STARTED RANTING.