HappyDancex2

The best Dean can muster up is "I hate myself." That's it?! Don't worry Dean, we hate you too. Way to make it all about you and your need for chaos and constant affirmation. Please Eff Off. Kristina for Bachlorette!

Ladies like Kristina confuse me and I don't think it's the editing. You and Dean are having sex. Yet you say you are ok with him keeping his other options open, but don't want to watch it. Then go on an epic crying jag after a night with Dean after you see him with Danielle, who he has told you he wants to explore his options with, which you know means he would like to bang her as well and see which one of you he prefers, if any. This isn't difficult language. He says he loves talking to you and your connection but he wants to play with her big boobs and not talk to her at all. So what is the problem? You freely have given away the milk (lol) and he doesn't have to buy the cow (lol) and there was never an implication of said milk being in an exclusive relationship. IF if did, you would walk up to Danielle's boobs and tell her that you and Dean have been sleeping together and you assumed that when you started doing that you thought you were in a relationship but clearly not because he's going after you to bang you too.....so if you want a duplicitous guy like that, that's what he's doing. Then you break up up with Dean and don't look back. OR. You are free to sleep with Dean, keep YOUR options open as well, sleep with any or all of them and don't look back. The sex doesn't have to mean anything. It doesn't mean anything to him and I *thought* it didn't mean anything to you, that's why you told him it was ok to keep his options open. Either you have a problem with it or not. Why this is stretching over days is beyond me. Gads, she's a beautiful girl and she's as clueless about relationships as the rest of them. I cannot believe we have not mastered Rules of Sex 101. And I hope she didn't start sleeping with him because she thought that would keep him. Oy.

Oh this. Frankly this show hasn't made me want to eat from food trucks after seeing the cramped compartments, low ventilation, sweaty people and specific to this show, low food budgets and questionable "tasks". The road screaming is otherwise annoying and jarring. And if someone was holding a boat of food and shoving it at my face offering me a discount I would wonder what was wrong with it, how long it's been in your hand, how many times have you spit coughed sneezed on it yelling at passersby. LOL!!! Snicker

His attitude is so dismissive. I'm not why we are supposed to embrace an annoying young male who wears makeup and is a self proclaimed diva as a charming culinary expert or more likely media personality. Be humble. Top Shot!!!! Thank you! That slo mo of stirred caramel actual made me laugh. I suspect empanada discs are regionally common at sams or costco. I think when you commit to it in your name and go on a tv show you might want to know how to make the dough, source the dough around the country or don't put it in your name. This show has routinely gone to podunk-ville....you can't seriously have expected to find premade dough. Calling a local authentic mexican grocer or restaurant for it would also be an option but time consuming and also risky.

Lacey transcended needy tonight. Her date with Diggy was uncomfortable to watch...she doesn't even have any real conversation skills. Her constant "well I don't know if you like me but..." "well I don't know if you are having a good time but...." type conversations are so juvenile. And she lacks so much self awareness that she thinks her date went great when it really was a giant pity date!!! And then instant tears? Gads. Is she going to marry the first guy that shows her any attention? Of course Taylor has so far found affection so even a blind squirrel finds a nut. Or in this case a deaf squirrel because any man who can put up with her nasally vocal fry and uptalking every damn sentence is a saint.

Many speculated Dean was this flaky kid who wasn't ready to settle down when he was on Rachel's season. Rachel dodged a bullet there. RUN KRISTINA RUN!!

No one should allow themselves to continue to be called "D.Lo." Her voice grates so much like I cannot like stand listening to her like choice of like words like either. She was insufferable with Nick with the giggle talking. And when she kissed Dean, he smiled (of course) and she kissed his teeth and got lipstick all over them. Barf.

I hope the Southern Frenchie truck gets eliminated next week. I was really hoping for this episode! If they are giving that girl with the horrible nasally vocal fry all of the talking heads, voice overs and tv time for their truck then this will be the shortest season ever for me. Her voice literally made me cringe. Stabby. I agree with the other posters on the tired euphemisms being puked out of this show. And Lord Honey it's only been a week since somebody's momma or granmomma got slapped with a biscuit. Hiya durn?! ::ducks::

Bobby tipped off Cory's boot by starting to razz him about being on social media talking so much about beating bobby flay...but then immediately giving him props for it being well deserved and cooking great food all season. It was the total consolation take away speech for the public to reinforce how competent he is as a chef. The odd thing is that with proper editing, I can totally see how Cory could fit in at FN. It's all about editing. They managed to make alex, anne, amanda, geoffrey, katie, sunny, etc. into food personalities with lots of exposure and proper editing.

That took 7 minutes on DVR. Which was nice. I'm ok with the outcome. Jason will make good talking heads, guest judging and FN live appearances. They are just crowning him for what they were going to have him do anyway. Lord Honey I was happy to zap the entire thing off the DVR.

I hope this doesn't come off as naive and I'll try to articulate my question as this is my first season of the Bachlorette. I'm just going to assume that she didn't sleep with Eric and she did sleep with both Peter and Bryan. And considering she is going to get engaged to one of them, she should sleep with them...it appeared she had a very strong connection with them etc. Had this been prior to the season starting she could have slept with any number of guys and it's just a number in the past. However my question is still the premise of the final 2 or 3 guys looking at each other knowing they just banged their hopeful "fiancee" is just hella weird to me. And it has nothing to do with her being a woman...this question stands when it's the guy at the end and the girl who is most likely to be chosen is looking around knowing he banged the others too. In previous seasons was the fantasy suite not offered to some or did it not imply sex? Or I guess when it's shown that the lead has at least 2 or 3 strong candidates at the end, is the navigation of this absurd situation left up to the lead person? Have the final 2 or 3 men or women ever gotten into a major fight about it? Nick's season was my first season of the Bachelor and I had the same thoughts...it was clear that Vanessa was the frontrunner and it would be odd if he had sex with Raven a few days before he proposed. I guess I am having trouble reconciling this whole fairy tale love thing when the final week comes down to potentially sex with multiple suitors in a short period of time, one leading to a breakup and another leading to an ENGAGEMENT for marriage. I just can't. So. Awkward????????

Penny Davidi version 2.0 was horrible to watch. You just knew her name was in that bag twice. I cannot believe she didn't improve one iota after she was eliminated and then bumbled around the kitchen so poorly even editing couldn't save her. I was surprised Matthew got the boot. I guess if we are at pilots then his job is done though...no sense in investing time in a pilot that they know won't come to fruition. Rusty isn't even a logical threat though...they really should have edited him in the "improvement" zone instead of stuttering, stopping, mumbling and staring. I was a bit torn on who would be the winner. Lord Honey seemed like the obvious choice if they want a talking head...Cory is tempting since he is a "real" chef....that would be nice on the FOOD network.....but ya know....

Highway Inn for local food. And any of the shrimp trucks. and shave ice....with adzuki and mochi topper with cream. Find some chocolate covered cuttlefish. Or chocolate covered mochi.

It occurred to me it would make more sense for Amy to be dressed with cleavage and parading around and Giada be the one to cover up a bit...there is something incongruent about the whole thing. I really can't put my finger on what seems out of place....is it a Time and Place thing with Giada? I mean who cares what she wears and if she shows boobage? But for some reason she just seems like a walking boob each week. We barely even notice her giant freak head and shark teeth anymore. Are we being trolled? Her level of disdain to try that corn dog was annoying AF. I'm sure she's had worse and greasier in her mouth....she didn't have to be so dramatic. It's a battered weiner. Deal with it Jadda. And they did show her taking a small bite of her half of a deviled egg...which she promptly put down and then picked up a fork to finish moving it around her plate. Guess that whole massive deviled egg is just too calorically dense? Yikes. It also occurred to me that this isn't even a show to find a food network star anymore. They trotted on that Hart girl from the internet and gave her a show and then the Cousins lobster guy is trotted on here as a host/guest judge...they weren't asked to compete on this clown show. Glad Amy is finally gone. She was wearing a horrible tied up tshirt in the first segment, a non descript sleeveless rag that looked like something you sleep in for the middle TV segment and a long floral dress in the last one. Her style is as confused as her presentations. Did Matthew make a mistake on the TV show segment? When he was talking about Rusty's presentation didn't he say "loaded mashed potatoes?" I will say that this week is as likeable as we've seen him. He did a nice job on both presentations. Smirky.

What I got out of this episode was that I'd like to book a trip to Rioja, Spain. Rachel gets to the end of the show and she shouldn't choose any of these 3. Nice job.

LOL Hula-la I posted the same thing after you! Wasn't that horrifying? I did enjoy the second segment of the live stream and then Alex cooking along side of them remotely. That was entertaining to watch.

What kind of Food Network authority doesn't automatically wash their hands after handling chicken? That feeling and smell after you handle any raw meat is just an automatic thing. Would you eat at her house? She's got blinders available to her...maybe it comes from cleaning up after pooping and puking kids in the 2-4 age range? She says she washes at home but now I don't believe her!!!! And they kept her for another week of buffoonery.

Boobs. Matthew "I'm grating so much cheese right now I"m thinking I don't need to go to the gym later because this is making me sore." Eye roll If I don't hear the word "hack" for a year it will be too soon. Gigantic food is gross. Boobs. Amy "PINK FROSTING AND RAINBOW SPRINKLES HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE!!!!" Eye roll. And can she stop shoving food in her mouth at the end and laughing and thinking she's cute? Boobs. Corey has meatball stutters. Not good. Boobs. I think they got exactly what they wanted out of this episode. That was beyond distracting.

OK that made me laugh. HARD. Poor Dean. He didn't have to even try to have the conversation with his dad but he tried. It looked like his dad was almost going to say something meaningful to Rachel but remembered he was on camera and it was a TV show so he decided to not give them the "moment." He basically said if she chose Dean he'd give her the time of day but he wasn't investing anymore into the show. Thanks Dad!! I learned why Bryan is single at his age. I thought it was going to be him and his Miyyammmii lifestyle. Nope. It's mamma.

I think this is our best snark thread so far. Well done. Carry on.

"Jadda likes to see me...sweat." Ugh. Get a room. Who's David?! He was decidedly unmemorable...which is bad for a FN personality. Matthew is memorable...thus cook cockroach will continue to show up on FN shows as the antagonist. amy needs to go like yesterday....she's awkward, let's move on.

Amy's hair is also ridiculous. Why does she take a section of it and knot it on the top of her head like a teletubby? If she doesn't want to style it or wants to keep it out of her face while cooking then just put it in a nice ponytail. The dye job is not being kept up during filming....I have no clue what she/they are thinking. If they can keep Anne Burrell's hair from showing roots, then it CAN be done. She has the most high maintenance dye job ever.

Anne's top came from the tin man collection. And it did make her chest look like it was in a weird place. Jadda was painfully covered up so she released all the buttons down to her navel. Good times. OK they tried to trick everyone but Matthew is a horrible actor and they went too far. Not a chance in blazing ass HELL that he didn't know what Coq au vin was....and then the corny mispronunciation of it over and over? Child please.

Dies.

This show has been great. Despite the lunacy of the contestants I've picked up 2 dishes. I've been making pickle brined chicken for weeks...I dust in sorghum and bake it and it's like healthy fried chicken. You can just use apple cider vinegar and stevia and garlic or dried onions for the brine. I also have been adding fresh dill. It's great. and Bye Addie...thanks for the heads up on "hammies" or what I googled were Kings Hawaiian sliders. Made them tonight and they were great. Who knew? Husband couldn't eat them cuz he's a celiac but the rest of us indulged in those tasty fatty messes. Delish for a party, which I hosted. yaHERD?