Maximona

What kind of dreadful parent forces their kids to listen to the Daddy-&-I-have-grown-apart speech in front of Bravo's creepy production team with the cameras rolling? I mean, granted the girls probably knew all about it. But even so. This was in really, really bad taste.

Like I say, somewhere above, I just finished reading a couple of Capote biographies for reasons completely unconnected to the airing of this show. Capote was very witty in real life, and he had that gift—which some people have & is better experienced than described—of giving his entire attention to you when he was talking to you. He also had that thing that children of alcoholics so often develop, a kind of hypervigilance that allowed him to track people, remember salient details about them. Capote could also be extraordinarily generous—as witness his practically becoming a foster father to Kate Harrington. That's just one example of his generosity among other. I think what this show misses entirely is that Capote was as much a victim of these brittle, shallow women's values as they were victims of his malicious tongue. He was short, weird-looking, weird-sounding, gay—the consummate outsider, in fact, and his way of dealing with that was to armor himself as a consummate insider. But, of course, beneath the armor, he was very insecure. And above all else, Capote was a writer. An excellent writer at times. The swans didn't understand that, and Capote couldn't understand why they didn''t understand that. “What did they expect?” he lamented to one friend. “I’m a writer, and I use everything. Did all those people think I was there just to entertain them?” And that is basically true! To a real writer, everything is material. 😀

Huh! That'll teach me to only look at the big umbrella. 😀 The direction is actually pretty deft. And I think Hollander is doing a fabulous job in the title role. But the script is weak. Kinda like the screenwriter was writing a scripted version of The Dead Housewives of New York City. Plus, Babe Paley as a Perry Como fan? I don't think so. 😀

There's a YouTube documentary you can watch for free called The Capote Tapes that's partly narrated by Kate Harrington. After O'Shea's wife divorced him, and the O'Shea family teetered on the brink of destitution, Harrington—then age 12 & called Kerry O'Shea—came to Capote and said, Can you help me figure out a way to make some money? My family is starving. Capote used his contacts to help her establish a lucrative modeling career, and she lived on and off with Capote for the rest of his life. When he was very sick & obviously dying, she helped care for him. See, that's one of the reasons why you can't write Capote off entirely as a shallow, opportunistic parvenu: He did some incredibly kind things from time to time that he never sought publicity for. And at his best, Capote was a truly remarkable writer—though I kinda think he may have had that idiot savant thing going on with that one 'cause I never got the impression he was very smart. I didn't like Episode 4 very much. Jack Dunphy deserves better than this bor-r-r-r-ing characterization. (Fun factoid: Dunphy, at one time, was a Broadway hoofer and the former husband of one of Bob Fosse's wives.) Also, there is no evidence whatsoever that Slim Keith had an affair with Bill Paley. And I don't see what injecting this "affair" into the narrative does to advance the narrative except to make it more sensationalized and incestuous, which, I suppose, is typical Ryan Murphy fare—and why Ryan Murphy is rich, and I'm not. 😀

Plus, she looks astoundingly like Erika, no? I mean, that therapist could be Erika's body double! 😀 And I don't know if I'll ever get used to people who've been Botoxed crying. They look just like department store dummies whose faces have been sprayed with pickle juice or something. That was a Western saddle on Santos, right? 'Cause Sutton didn't look like she was posting. Other than that, a boring episode.

Yes!!!!!! Exactly!!! For reasons completely unrelated to this show, I was on a Truman Capote biography reading binge these past two weeks. Gerald Clarke's excellent Capote: A Biography and George Plimpton's oral biography. Truman vs. The Swans is very entertaining, but the way it positions Capote's downfall seems off the mark to me. In Cold Blood is a pretty terrific book; moreover, it invented a whole new literary genre. By all accounts, it was extremely difficult to write because while writing it, Capote formed a very strange relationship with Perry Smith, one of the murderers, Perry Smith. They became emotionally very close; some people even thought they had somehow contrived to become lovers. Capote was very insistent that the book couldn't be completed unless the two murderers were executed. In fact, he insisted he had to watch the executions. (He did watch Hickcock's execution, but he couldn't bring himself to watch Perry Smith's.) There's considerable weirdness behind needing someone you are emotionally attached to be executed—by hanging, no less!—while you watch because you need to finish your book. It's kinda the ultimate betrayal of love. The boozing and the drug-taking began then. Good writing is hard. And you can't do it very well if you're perpetually drunk or drugged. Since he could no longer write well, Capote fell into writing gossip. The chapters of Answered Prayers that exist are really execrably written. Just really, really, really bad. PageSix on LSD-levels of bad. In his mind, Capote was writing a 20th Century À la recherche du temps perdu—Proust's novel was also a Big Scandal when he published it. The difference is that À la recherche was well-written, and Answered Prayers was not. Anyway, this explanation would have been too sophisticated for Ryan Murphy. Far easier to see it as a socialite Mean Girls—plus socialite Mean Girls attracts more viewers, too! 😀 I do hope Gore Vidal gets to make an appearance somewhere on this show. When Capote's liver finally gave out, and he died, Gore Vidal quipped, A wise career move. Of course, Gore Vidal died as a pathetic old drunk, too. There must be some sort of moral there. 😀

Oh, I think Aspen is very much a place where "friends" care about living a specific lifestyle. 😀

Huh. So, I guess Sutton is not a fan of Coen Brothers' films. (The Merce blowback was straight out of The Big Lebowski.) And let's see... Kyle is a compulsive shopper, and she wonders why her husband is so obsessed with making money. 😀 I've actually gotta give Erika some props for resisting the kumbaya vibe. Sutton is one of my faves, but honestly? That whole "letting go" thing was highly performative.

She does! Probably as much as Wendy hates her children. Waking a kid up at 4:30 am on their birthday??? Anybody have a number for Potomac Child Protective Services?

I was distracted this entire episode by how flabby Alexia's arms are. Why am I suddenly noticing this for the first time? Is this the first time she's ever worn really short sleeves? Or did Alexia's arms just suddenly get flabby? These Ho'Wives did something I thought was impossible: They made Mexico City feel boring.

My head exploded when I found out Sutton has Merce Cunningham's ashes. (I am still picking up the pieces. 😀 ) He was/is a very, very Big Deal in the world of contemporary dance. I had no idea Sutton was once a dancer. We now know Kyle journals!!! (Quick shot of her with open notebook on the plane.) That oughta hit The New York Times bestseller list circa 2026. And day-em, AnneMarie! Way to buzzkill the party! Couldn't you have waited until the apres-dinner drunken hilarity—I believe this is an actual Bravo Ho'Wife contract stipulation: At dinner, you will all get drunk, and after dinner, you must character-assassinate one another—to begin the Crystal dissing? Viz Crystal: Don't we all (secretly or not so secretly) want other people to think we're exceptional (i.e. better than the rest?) Isn't that why AnneMarie is constantly trotting out her CRNA credential? It is true that Crystal is one of the only two non-exhibitionists amidst the current crop of Ho'Wives. Does this make her "boring"? (Well, to be honest... a little.) Garcelle would be the other non-exhibitionist. But Garcelle doesn't need to be an exhibitionist; she's naturally charismatic.

Robyn is digging in her heels. But she divorced him once already, & the first time's the hardest! 😀 I think Robyn's one of those people who takes it stoically till it reaches a certain point (whatever "it" is) and then does a 180. We shall see!

I loved the interactions between Nneka & her sister, Karen & Rayvin at the tattoo parlor, Karen, Gizelle, Rayvin, & Grace at breakfast. Candiace's Mother's Day brunch was, indeed, fabulous. Peonies are such lovely flowers. (What a contrast to the hideous Mother's Day event on RHOM!) I love the idea of a perfume party!!! Candiace is no Dinah Washington, but I didn't even mind her singing (as much as I usually do.) The only boring stuff was Robyn & her family about whom I couldn't care less at this point. Robyn is totally in concrete bunker mode about her marriage. I think the divorce announcement is maybe eight months off. Maybe. (Wouldn't be surprised if it came a lot sooner.)

Homeless Not Toothless is absolutely the worst name for a philanthropic organization I've ever heard. So humiliating to the charity's recipients. A not-so-subliminal message: We're privileged; you're pathetic. Honestly, the name makes me angry. Erica looked as good at the gala as I've ever seen her. I liked Sutton's dress, too, that gradation of blush to a more vivid shade of rose. But Taylor Dayne's dress was beyond hideous: Her boobs looked like they were each in their own little microwaveable Saran Wrap sac. She needed a better bra. Or something. AnneMarie is just...off. I wanted to like her—us RNs gotta stick together, and yes, if she's got a DNP degree (Doctor of Nursing Practice), then technically she is a "Doctor" (the same way a PhD is technically a "Doctor"—but she is really abrasive, unattuned to the subtleties. Kinda reminds me of those contestants back when I used to watch Survivor who would go in with all guns firing on Episode 1.

Those Botox-suppressed frown lines gotta go somewhere! 😀 My WTF??? moment in this episode came when Kyle merrily confessed that she buys something every day. I mean, so do I, but my purchases are generally things like a pack of gum, a dozen eggs, a quart of milk, a few gallons of gas. Nothing you'd need a 2,000 square-foot closet for. I see nothing but calculation in Morgan Wade's eyes when she looks at Kyle. Like, How far can this beayatch take me on the Road to Fame? And I don't like her voice at all! Very nasal & I don't hear any evidence of range. I have been warming up to PK a bit recently. True, he's kind of boorish, but his "high maintenance" takedown of Dorit was right on target. What does he do on all those London trips anyway?

Well, I know the Miami Ho'wives were puttin' on a show at Nicole's par-tay because that (after all) is what Bravo's paying them to do. It's all fake & scripted. Still. When you watch it, you get pulled in. And in the spirit of that, I could not believe what horrible manners these women have! If someone has gone to as much trouble as Nicole did to plan a special occasion, how could you possibly behave the way Alexia, Marisol, & Lisa behaved? Though I did have to laugh as Alexia & Marisol swept out the door the first time with their party swag jackets under their arms! 😀 And what was up with Alexia's hideous lipstick color choice? Lisa is beyond horrifying. All my sympathy is with Lenny, frankly. How could anyone put up with that brainless, vapid, entitled be-yatch for more than 10 seconds? And she's so grotesque! With those over-sized duck lips, those creepy little eyes, the rest of that weird pinched face, and those Jessica-Rabbit-sized baz-ooooms! If this is Dr. Lenny's work in action, I guess the moral of the story is that Dr. Frankenstein should never marry his monster. I keep wondering why Julia & Nicole are on this show. They seem so comparatively normal.

I personally like Kim's artwork. Walls may or may not be the appropriate place for that artwork—depending on what room those walls are a part of. But certainly, it's easy enough to have those walls repainted when Kim moves out. Anne Marie was not technically wrong in anything she was saying to Sutton (full disclosure: I'm an ER nurse) but I had to wonder, why was she saying it? Nobody asked her. Sounds like Sutton has esophageal stenosis not esophageal stricture. Esophageal stenosis is like a fixed narrowing, and it can be congenital. Esophageal strictures generally are a reaction to some underlying illness, and yes, alcohol can exacerbate the smooth muscle contractions that are causing the stricture. But I would never, ever interject a medical opinion in a social setting with lots of people around. It's just rude, one of those social gambits designed to extort attention—Look at how much I know! Quite obnoxious behavior. (I will venture medical opinions in smaller groups of people if I'm specifically asked. But I always preface everything I say with, "Obviously, I don't know all the facts of your situation," and I end everything I say, "If you're really worried, you should see your primary healthcare provider.") People drink alcohol and take antidepressants & gabapentin all the time, true. But it's not recommended. In the former case, because after its initially stimulating effect, alcohol is a depressant; in the latter, because both have sedating effects.

California is a full practice state for advanced practice RNs. APRNs can practice to the full extent of their training and education—which certainly extends to giving medical advice.

I was willing to cut Annemarie some slack on this one because I was so tickled she was honest when asked about her weight. ("One-hundred and sixty!") She's a nurse anesthetist, which means she knows a lot about the respiratory and circulatory systems but maybe not so much about the digestive system. Denise was wayyyyy smashed on something at the weed dinner, but I figure I would have been, too, had I had to encounter the Ho'wives again after all the ways they tried to humiliate her. Erika was a particular bitch. It's very bizarre to me how the Ho'wives think the beginning of a new season wipes memories clean. Kim looked great. I was very pleased that the triangulation dynamic among the three sisters seemed to be working on her behalf for once. And I thought her artwork was really interesting visually in addition to being pretty.\

I came away with the feeling that Kyle has an enormous girl crush on Morgan. But I did not get the feeling that Morgan has an enormous girl crush on Kyle. In fact, I got the distinct impression that Morgan does not particularly like Kyle & is stringing her along—not in any malicious way but not with any great enthusiasm either—to see how much PR she can reap from the situation. And I didn't get a gay vibe from Morgan at all. I didn't think Denise Richards looked that bad, either. Though she was clearly very drunk. Who wouldn't be having to walk back into that particular vipers' den? I think the Bravo production crew was determined to make Denise look as awful as possible, so they kept shooting her from unflattering camera angles, in unflattering light that played up her marionette lines, etc, etc, etc. Gotta say I just ❤️LUV❤️ that Denise & Camille Grammar are on plus one terms. I also think that Sutton is still totin' a half-lit torch for her X, and that's the reason why she can't find a new man. Sutton's always struck me as a tru-luv-unto-death kinda gal. And wow! That dinner party was EVERYTHING!!!!!! Swoon, swoon, swoon, swoon, swoon!!!!! More dinner parties, Andy!!! Less Magic Mike!!! I beg you!!!

Totally! And if Sutton hadn't been bombed when Kyle "dropped by," Bravo producers would have figured out some other way to edit her as a complete loser because Sutton is indeed this season's target. I'm kinda wondering to what extent Sutton has picked up on this. I mean, she's as neurotic as hell, but she's also one of the smarter and more observant of the Ho'wives. Of course, this would imply that the Bravo higher-ups pick the target & redemption arcs fairly early in the Ho'wives seasons, & I dunno (and can't prove) that's the case. Sutton has very thin skin, so if she is aware she's a target, she's gonna act battier and battier. Honestly, I cannot figure out why she is on this show. She doesn't need it.

He seems eager to be a regular - I think they worked up this act of Crazy Boss/Patient Butler together. That was my hit, too. Like Avi really wants screen time, but the only way he & Sutton can make it happen is by Sutton playing weird, demented boss.

Hmmm. See, I don't think she did "ruin the night for everyone." She wasn't having a good time; she left. The cameras followed her because that's the camera operators' job. Garcelle may have followed her because it's just possible that Sutton & Garcelle are what non-Ho'wives call "friends," but Kyle followed her for more camera time, and more camera time is Kyle's idea of The Big Fun. Always remember: These are not normal women enjoying each others' company! They are employees doing a job! They welcome snits! It gives them something to fill up their camera time!

I find Sutton engaging precisely because she is so socially awkward & that is such a mismatch with being so obscenely rich! 😀 And I kinda got what was happening to her at Magic Mike. She got herself all revved up over something as part of a pack and then crashed because that something was kinda awful. This happens so often for me in my particular girl-pack of long-term pals that we've actually invented a term for it: "Uh-oh! Maximona is having one of her hollow mirror flashes again!" I mean, presumably, she decided to become a Real Ho'wife to give her boutique a much-needed shot in the arm. (Otherwise, in Beverly Hills' current economic landscape, it would have long since closed.) She's contractually obligated to go along with the high jinx, but on this (as on so many other occasions), she no can do. By failing, Sutton provides some of the rare, non-producer-scripted moments on RHOBH. So, I say: What's not to ❤️LUV❤️ 😀

I guess I'm sitting at a table for one at The Bear restaurant because while I liked Season 1 a lot, I really disliked Season 2. Why? Because while Season 1 is over the top, it’s still grounded in realism. Some magical realism, true. But realism. While for me, Season 2 just reeks of post-modern sentimentality. Case in point: “Yes, Chef.” In Season 1, “Yes, Chef,” is a refreshing instigation of basic civility in a hostile environment. In Season 2, it’s like the verbal prompt by which members of a secret cult recognize one another—as best exemplified by that awful episode in which Richie gets sent off to the Finest Restaurant in the World for a week, where he polishes forks, visits with QEII (who knew she moonlighted as a chef, right?) and learns the true meaning of humility and service. Richie is the most gratuitous character ever. I am totally UNinterested in Richie’s redemption arc. I just want him to slither out of my Hulu browser and crawl far, far away from me. Even worse, though, was that awful Christmas episode where Jamie Lee Curtis trotted out her best histrionics in a bid to add the next crown to her EGOT press. (I suppose next she’ll star in a musical production of Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf and sing on the original cast recording.) I guess this is what they would call a “pet peeve,” what with me being Southern Italian and all. But I am really sick of TV and movie representations of Southern Italian dysfunctionality. Now, I know there are Southern Italian families that scream at each other. Just like I know there are Black people who enjoy eating watermelon. But you can bet you’d never get away these days with having a Black character eat watermelon on television just to wring an Ain't It Awful laugh from the viewing audience.