Oldernowiser

Weed out the hate watchers, scandal rubberneckers, and those who are stunningly bored and channel surfing through a December Sunday night...is the remaining number sustainable for a series? Especially given how few paid advertisers they have? I'd be surprised. I had a job not too long ago where agencies used to pitch media buys to me for consideration...and unless the product I'm selling is faux gold copies of the Gothard bible, I wouldn't touch this with a ten-foot pole.

Not to get too far afield, but Paris is a HILTON. In the upper upper upper class, 1% stratosphere. Her family's money and her engineered looks gave her whatever freakshow of a semi-career that B list celebrity passes for these days. A bunch of infamous uber religious rubes from Nowhere, Arkansas, have nothing within a million miles similar in terms of money, looks, or power.

It's my belief that if the AM hack hadn't outed Josh to the media, the family would have buried this even deeper than Josh's sister fondling. Much deeper. They just would have quietly tightened his choke chain, told him to knock up the little woman ASAP, and gone on with the Duggars Are Wonderful Show.

Okay, so I actually looked at a still..good grief. WTF, he let JimBob operate? I have no use for any of them but that looks BAD. I hope it doesn't feel as painful as it looks?

If they cry, people feel sorry for them. If enough people feel sorry for them, maybe they'll be supportive of Duggarfuck 2.0 and TLC has some of their franchise back. It's all about the benjamins...

I feel certain that it's been said before, but if you take the colon out of the episode title and add "because God forbid we might have to actually work for a living," it's dead on. Also it occurs to me that if we here had come up with "Spurgeon" as a nickname for the baby there would be posts accusing us of meanness and possibly mod action. Ain't it like, ironic, y'all.

Okay, so who's going to run the betting pool on how fast Josh cheats again? I've got three months for the actual cheating and six for when the story hits the media. Because whar consequences have there been? He's spending six months away from any of those icky responsibilities like parenting, working, or household chores and just focusing on Josh. That's spa time for this creep.

Well, in all fairness, that's a "just wait until you see what I'm putting in my diaper right now" expression if I ever smelled, er, saw one.

Sibling rivalry being normal...sure. But when each of these children has eighteen of them and was their mother's most precious special blessing ever...until he/she turned six months old and was promptly dumped off into the buddy system...that's taking it to a whole different level. We're talking Lord of the Flies, family-style. It's kind of amazing none of them hasn't tried to off a few and my money would have been on Jessa if she hadn't had the pretty thing making her "special." There's a latent Mean Girl glint in her eyes.

THERE ARE THREE OF THESE???? Not sure how I missed this reality...probably blocked it out because No My God. Exactly how much time can baby pictures, Biblical misquoting, wedding flashbacks, and fake tears fill up?

"Oops I Did It Again"?

As the introvert's introvert, I can't imagine how horribly uncomfortable I would be growing up in that chaos. Between the clingy little "buddies," the constant forced marches in public, the lockdown dorm sleeping arrangements...there is no place or time to be alone. Oh, wait, there's always the prayer closet...

What an arrogant putz.

And...now the transformation to Friends 2.0 is complete. Just another three couple romcom. Yawn. Show, you were great once. Thanks for the memories.

I get what you're saying but in defense of rural America, I've had far more attentive and expert care in one ambulance ride and two ER visits here in Nowhere, Maine, than I ever did in NYC, Seattle, or metro Detroit ERs. Sometimes being in a low population area works for you instead of against you.

You're probably right about People misrepresenting the circumstances and cast members...but if in fact there was anyone with any medical training or credentials present at Jessa's labor, why the hell weren't they on the call to 911 instead of Grandma Clueless Fuckwit? A real medical professional gets on the phone because he/she speaks the language and knows which facts to communicate and in what order to facilitate both the triage that the dispatcher needs to do and to prepare the EMT team for what to expect and how best to treat the patient quickly once they arrive. I wouldn't rely on Michelle to call AAA if I had a flat tire, so WTF with her phoning in a potentially life threatening delivery complication??? I call bullshit.

The French even do scathing better than anyone...bravo.

And a condom. (just me? Sorry...)

"Or I'll fucking kill you."

It's all so stupid. Casual channel flippers won't care and hate watchers and leg humpers already know.

"I felt those contractions with you!" Um, no you really didn't. You were sitting in a wicker chair with a Fundie Mojito and grinding your teeth that your birthing fame was being stepped on. And why do they have to make their messages public? My sister and I text most days but I would be horrified if anyone saw it. Of course, there ain't a whole lot of precious blessedness involved. I would so contribute to a gofundme when little Spurgeon files to have his name legally changed. I hope he changes it to John Smith. Or Satan Beelzebub.

Oh, sweetie. Bless your gentle heart. I'll just say that given the right circumstances they'd sell themselves out for a bucket of extra crispy with extra sides.

Okay, so I can ALMOST excuse Jessa because clearly it was a difficult delivery for her. Although I note she can be in full makeup and hair done for the Atrocity Announcement a week later. But WTF did Ben do that requires catching up on his sleep? Did he push a ten-pound baby out of his nethers? No? Then suck it up and take care of your child. Guys your age can stay up for three nights in a row playing freaking video games...you can damned well watch a sleeping baby and change a diaper a few times.

Catholic transgender.

See, now Zevon Seewald is awesome. I'm going to call him that.