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You Know You're Obsessed With Slop When...

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You know you're obsessed with SLOP when…I have a few buddhas around the house…and every time…when somebody asks about them I finish wit: "My Buddha, She's Faux…"

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YKYOwSW... while driving home from family reunion in Texas, I saw a sign for Ivars and remembered a certain reedited ep. Ithink this particular Ivars, however, was a bar.

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YKYOwSW... you're watching an obligatory "what to do with Thanksgiving leftovers?" segment on a morning news program when a chef makes milkshakes from the pumpkin pies' filling.

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I'm guessing he didn't add booze though, which I am sure SLop would do!  And topped with Cool Whip and punkin pie spice, of course.

 

YKYOWS when... An old "Facts of Life" rerun you watched on Youtube makes you think of SLop.

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YKYOWS when... I was reading an article about William's and Kate's trip to NYC. Part of the itinerary had Kate visiting a children's charity and wrapping gifts with New York's "first lady." I was horrified when I thought of Kate with SLOP, when I re-read the article, it was the first lady of NYC. Whew... Kate dodged a bullet there.

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Holy crap, grisgris, can you imagine Aunt Sandy and Duchess Kate hanging out together? And who knows what kind of crazy gift wrapping tablescape would be involved. And mocktails, since even Sandy would know not to offer a pregnant woman an alcoholic drink. (She does know that much, rIght?) What a missed opportunity!!!

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She did have a cocktail for her combined wedding/baby shower Semi-Ho episode (aka The Blinding Yellow Episode, I believe).  I'm sure the cocktail was strictly for a bridal shower though.  Right?  RIGHT?  Of course she never actually said so...

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Holy crap, grisgris, can you imagine Aunt Sandy and Duchess Kate hanging out together? And who knows what kind of crazy gift wrapping tablescape would be involved. And mocktails, since even Sandy would know not to offer a pregnant woman an alcoholic drink. (She does know that much, rIght?) What a missed opportunity!!!

I'd be more concerned about SLoP trying to make or recreate British food or whatever the royal palace is famous for serving.

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I'd be more concerned about SLoP trying to make or recreate British food or whatever the royal palace is famous for serving.

 

Already done.  Didn't she have that Semi-Ho episode with the British theme?  I don't remember much about it, except I think that was the one where she used this product called Steam 'n' Mash or something like that, and put a horse bridle on the table for her 'scape.

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Didn't she have that Semi-Ho episode with the British theme?

She did! It was called English Feast and featured a steamed pudding made of cereal and cooked in a slow cooker. That Sandy, what a trip.

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I think Sandy would show up to greet Kate dressed in a long white fur (hopefully fake) coat (picture Liberace) and some type of gaudy white fascinator with lots of feathers and completed with white elbow-length gloves and white Stevie Nicks platform boots.

 

She'd probably break royal protocol (ala LeBron James) and give Kate a huge bear hug.

 

The drink would be a mocktail with some kind of cheapo insta-brew tea and vanilla yogurt (nice and runny and lumpy) whizzed up in the blender with pumpkin pie spice and garnished with Cool Whip and a huge white feathered plume (think the fairy queen cocktails from Halloweens past. Of course, Sandy would liberally spike hers with vanella vodka.

 

Tea sammiches with Wonder Bread (sans crusts) filled with cheddar cheese soup and shredded pepper jack cheese. SH wedding treats are trotted out for the hollowed-out cucumbers with that awful faux crab meat, capers and cream cheese fillings, with dill and lemon juice from a bottle.

 

Dessert -- whack-a-dough "scones" made with instant cinnamon-raisin oatmeal and almond paste (or you could substitute ricotta cheese.)

 

The gift wrapping would be a cinch. White paper and white ribbon.

 

Wah-la!

 

(I have been watching the old SH Christmas specials on DVR and I sure miss Aunt Sandy.)

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 The first thing I thought when I heard that William and Kate were coming to New York was that somewhere, Sandra dropped a bottle of vanilla vodka in dramatic fashion and began working on her tablescape because her career as a social climber was going to reach it's climax, she was going to meet actual royalty. I bet she was threatening Andrew's life while trying to make it happen and is pissed that it didn't.

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YKYOwSL...

 

I just opened up an email for an estate sale and was thrilled by this guy's collection of nutcrackers. He even had a 6 ft. Bjorn wannabee!

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YKYOwSW you're doing a marketing survey for a "pre-made" frosting concept and think "Well, this would be one less step for SLoP's frosting-in-a-Glad-baggie trick".

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YKYOWSW....you happen to be standing next to the seasoning packets at your regular groshry store and start feeling very heavy Sandy vibes.

 

I am not kidding...it's like she was there in spirit or something.

Edited by ragstoriches
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YKNYOWSW:

 

I was watching the finale of "Holiday Baking Championship," and the camera zoomed in on a plastic container of, you guessed it, MARSCAPONE.

 

Seriously, the container was labeled that way (obviously by FN monkeys, but still...) for a PROFESSIONAL BAKING COMPETITION????

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YKNYOWSW:

 

I was watching the finale of "Holiday Baking Championship," and the camera zoomed in on a plastic container of, you guessed it, MARSCAPONE.

 

Seriously, the container was labeled that way (obviously by FN monkeys, but still...) for a PROFESSIONAL BAKING COMPETITION????

Where's Giada when you need her?

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Mars Capone? Is he any relation to Al Capone?  (Old SLop / TWOP joke. Merry Christmas, all!)

He's Vinny Garette's colleague, isn't he? Happy X-mas, my fellow shrikes.

Edited by jcbrown
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I was watching that hipster douchbag's Food Network show in the waiting room this morning and he was visiting a rib place whose owner boils his ribs and couldn't help but remember the time SLop boiled pork ribs in roiling chicken stock for several hours.

 

Oh yeah, he still think doing things like shoving his face into a bowl of sour cream after eating something super spicy is funny beyond words. Ugh.

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That reminds me of asking my husband (born and raised in Alabama) if his family had New Year's Day food traditions. I'm from Pennsylvania, and we always had pork chops. He said they always had pork of some sort too, but one year his mother decided to make pork ribs in a pressure cooker - and they were absolutely inedible.

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I was watching that hipster douchbag's Food Network show in the waiting room this morning and he was visiting a rib place whose owner boils his ribs and couldn't help but remember the time SLop boiled pork ribs in roiling chicken stock for several hours.

Off topic but this reminds me of a conversation my sisters had. My one sister was talking about hot dogs, my other sister asked how she makes them and she said boiled. Well, somehow things got confused and she thought she meant she boils her burgers. Sounds just as bad!

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Off topic but this reminds me of a conversation my sisters had. My one sister was talking about hot dogs, my other sister asked how she makes them and she said boiled. Well, somehow things got confused and she thought she meant she boils her burgers. Sounds just as bad!

Why do I have the strange feeling SLop did that once? ha ha

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I was at the seasoning/spices section of the groshry store (although not my reg'lar one), and what did I see?  Pumpkin pie spice!  OK, I'm sure that stuff is everywhere, but this was my first sighting.

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YKYOWSW....you make more than one attempt in a single trip to your regular groshry store to page through Sandy's latest magazine, hoping the person who is in the aisle doesn't notice, trying to get an eyeful of as much as you can without actually buying it, eye-rolling at the names of her cocktails, such as the Honey-Bunny-Tini (yes, that is real).

 

Was it ever mentioned on here before that there is a brand of margarita called Sandra Lee's Cocktail Time?  Because there is.

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YKYOWSW....you make more than one attempt in a single trip to your regular groshry store to page through Sandy's latest magazine, hoping the person who is in the aisle doesn't notice, trying to get an eyeful of as much as you can without actually buying it, eye-rolling at the names of her cocktails, such as the Honey-Bunny-Tini (yes, that is real).

 

Was it ever mentioned on here before that there is a brand of margarita called Sandra Lee's Cocktail Time?  Because there is.

 

I mentioned it somewhere a week or 2 ago, when I saw several bottles of it prominently displayed at Trader Joe's.  Yesterday, the same display had only 1 bottle left.  

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I mentioned it somewhere a week or 2 ago, when I saw several bottles of it prominently displayed at Trader Joe's. Yesterday, the same display had only 1 bottle left.

I came here to post about this!

The SAME THING happened at my local TJ's. One lonely bottle.

Anyone tried it? I dunno... I think Imma take one for the team...

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Well how bad could a margarita be, after all?  But you could probably make your own cheaper.  I did think it was a pretty bottle, though.

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Happy Saturday morning! Wasn't Aunt Snady on at 10AM Saturday mornings? Posting to remind you all to remember to remove the seeds from red sweet peppers because they're "spicy!"

Miss you all!

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