S12.E11: Surface Tension

[JMO]

I had the same impression.  The place seemed much smaller than before, and not just because there was so much more furniture crammed into it.  Reid obviously values order, else he wouldn't have asked for his friends' help in restoring it, after his grief over Maeve.  It's possible some of the additional things were Diana's, since assisted living places will usually allow you some furniture and possessions---but not that much.  So I don't know if the clutter was supposed to have been from Diana, or if someone just went overboard in decorating the set.

The apartment we've seen in the past seemed much more 'Reid' to me.  I did appreciate seeing some of the hanging artwork, and I liked that he listens to vinyl.  I haven't rewatched the episode yet, but I don't remember seeing it----was his chess set visible?

Reid is only a technophobe in every fifth episode.

[ReidFan]

no, that's the other thing that really annoyed me. In "Magnum Opus", the chess table was very clearly set up, by that bookcase next to a stained glass window that I thought was spectacularly gorgeous. No sign of stained glass this time, and I don't recall seeing the chess table either but I'm actually just home from work, and going through the ep to screencap furnishings etc again.

[Bookish Jen]

The unsub plot notwithstanding (boring) I thought this was an exceptional episode regarding Spencer and his mother, Diana. I think both Matthew and Jane should submit this episode to whomever nominates actors for the Emmy Awards. Furthermore, I appreciate your thoughts and opinions regarding the various elements of Spencer's current situation and how it may affect him in both the short and long run. Many of your thoughts and opinions mirror my very own.

However, I am refraining from commenting on this episode because so much of it cuts way to close too home for me, including when Diana slapped Spencer and it left a mark. Both my grandmothers had dementia/Alzheimer's so I can relate to what Spencer is going through all to easily. It is so difficult to see someone who was once full of life slowly turn into a shell of "nothingness." And at this moment there is no treatment or medication that can heal these two heartbreaking afflictions. 

Interesting enough I know of two documentaries that focus on dementia and Alzheimer's that are well worth your watching. One is the the PBS documentary "Alzheimer's: Every Minute Counts," which takes an informative and heartbreaking look on how both these afflictions affect both the suffering and the family members who take care of them. Also, there are wonderful facilities who have the capabilities to take care of these people, but sadly, they come at a huge price. Even someone with a good income like Spencer would find difficulty to pay for a facility but somehow he'd probably find a way; he's pretty thrifty.

Here is a link:

http://www.pbs.org/tpt/alzheimers-every-minute-counts/home/

As many as you know I belong to my church's film selection committee. Last season (2015/2016) we showed the documentary Alive Inside, which conveys how music connects with dementia/Alzheimer's and gives them a spark of vitality they  usually lack by using the music of their youth (hence, the Elvis ticket stub in Diana's scrapbook, the one element that actually made me crack a wee smile in between the teary moments). I can't recommend this movie enough. Just to see these people connect and enjoy the music they loved when they were teenagers and young adults meant so much to me, and will probably mean a lot to you if you see this documentary.

Here is a link:

http://www.aliveinside.us/#trailer

Just a hint; please have a lot of tissues on hand if you see these documentaries. You will shed plenty tears of sadness, joy and rage. Heck, I just watched the trailer of Alive Inside and I'm now crying a bit.

Edited February 4, 2017 by Bookish Jen

[normasm]

12 minutes ago, Bookish Jen said:

The unsub plot notwithstanding (boring) I thought this was an exceptional episode regarding Spencer and his mother, Diana. I think both Matthew and Jane should submit this episode to whomever nominates actors for the Emmy Awards. Furthermore, I appreciate your thoughts and opinions regarding the various elements of Spencer's current situation and how it may affect him in both the short and long run. Many of your thoughts and opinions mirror my very own.

However, I am refraining from commenting on this episode because so much of it cuts way to close to home for me, including when Diana slapped Spencer and it left a mark. Both my grandmothers had dementia/Alzheimer's so I can relate to what Spencer is going through all to easily. It is so difficult to see someone who was once full of life slowly turn into a shell of "nothingness." And at this moment there is no treatment or medication that can heal these two heartbreaking afflictions. 

Interesting enough I know of two documentaries that focus on dementia and Alzheimer's that are well worth your watching. One is the the PBS documentary "Alzheimer's: Every Minute Counts," which takes an informative and heartbreaking look on how both these afflictions affect both the suffering and the family members who take care of them. Also, there are wonderful facilities who have the capabilities to take care of these people, but sadly, they come at a huge price. Even someone with a good income like Spencer would find difficulty to pay for a facility but somehow he'd probably find a way; he's pretty thrifty.

Here is a link:

http://www.pbs.org/tpt/alzheimers-every-minute-counts/home/

As many as you know I belong to my church's film selection committee. Last season (2015/2016) we showed the documentary Alive Inside, which conveys how music connects with dementia/Alzheimer's and gives them a spark of vitality they  usually lack by using the music of their youth (hence, the Elvis ticket stub in Diana's scrapbook, the one element that actually made me crack a wee smile in between the teary moments). I can't recommend this movie enough. Just to see these people connect and enjoy the music they loved when they were teenagers and young adults meant so much to me, and will probably mean a lot to you if you see this documentary.

Here is a link:

http://www.aliveinside.us/#trailer

Just a hint; please have a lot of tissues on hand if you see these documentaries. You will shed plenty tears of sadness, joy and rage. Heck, I just watched the trailer of Alive Inside and I'm now crying a bit.

Thanks for those links, Booky. I was just thinking about the music link, how it does help dementia-affected people. I have a friend, contemporary in age, who is in the last stages of some sort of dementia (she can no longer speak or see). When this nightmare started taking her over, she clung to things like church services with the ritual prayers and songs, and she would play the piano and sing at her assisted living facility. Here was a woman who had taught deaf-blind children how to communicate, and she slowly lost her ability to speak. Her children did spot her at one point signing to herself, as if in conversation.

[ReidFan]

okay, just finished going through it again. And I rescind my complaint. The stained glass window is still there, at the very left side of his living room (as it was in Magnum Opus); that bookcase is there as well. There's a shot of what might be his chess set on the small table next to a chair behind them both in the scene where he's talking to the new caregiver on the sofa.

[senin]

I'm glad you've found the window and the bookcase. I'm not that sure that the chess set is in the second picture, I can't see it very well. And some people have mentioned that the apartment has a different feeling, and I agree. Maybe it's done on purpose, to match Spencer's state of mind and feelings. 

[ReidFan]

I *think* this is a chess set, but I couldn't blow it up better to make it more visible. It certainly isn't the same one he had in Magnum Opus, at any rate, that was a much larger table, with ornate, possibly pewter, chess pieces.

[Willowy]

KILL her? What? There's no way he would ever try to do that. There are far easier ways to kill someone than poisioning, and Reid knows them all by now. 

He would never try to kill his mother. If it ever came to a 'mercy killing' type-thing, she'd have to be far worse off than she is now, and it would be immediate. 

[SVNBob]

1 hour ago, Franky said:

KILL her? What? There's no way he would ever try to do that.

You say that, but when he was tying the scarf around her wrist at the end of the episode, I was wondering....

[Danielg342]

I'm not sure I could live with a Reid that does a mercy killing. Full stop. For someone with his kind of empathy, it just wouldn't make sense that he'd be so deceptive with his mother and pretend that he's saving her only to off her.

So I go with the drug running story. Perhaps he went to a dealer who gave him enough, and that dealer was very difficult to find- or that dealer is now dead or in jail, hence why his liquid "cannot be replaced".

[ReidFan]

4 hours ago, SVNBob said:

You say that, but when he was tying the scarf around her wrist at the end of the episode, I was wondering....

he did that so if she woke up (while he was sleeping) he would know. Dementia patients are well known for wandering off. In fact, there is a lady from my own neighbourhood missing right this moment who wandered off yesterday morning and they haven't found her yet.

I don't think the tie around her wrist is anything more than a safety feature right now.

[SVNBob]

Just now, ReidFan said:

he did that so if she woke up (while he was sleeping) he would know. Dementia patients are well known for wandering off. In fact, there is a lady from my own neighbourhood missing right this moment who wandered off yesterday morning and they haven't found her yet.

I don't think the tie around her wrist is anything more than a safety feature right now.

I realized that that was what he was doing and why as the scene continued.  But my initial reaction was what I posted above.

[normasm]

qwerty, i'm sorry, the idea that Reid would kill the one person he loves more than any other in the world, and on top of that, try to make it look like a natural death (which qualifies him for cold-blooded murderer status) is all kinds of crazy wrong.

In any scenario i can imagine with the canon Spencer Reid (as I see him), he would have to be terribly depressed to the point of suicide, and if he would kill Diana, he would follow her shortly after, by his own hand.

[JMO]

I think he is trying to cure her, but I don't think it is out of the realm of possibility that whatever he is giving her will end up causing some unintended harm.  Although that sounds like too complex a story line for the show to pull off as a 'B' story (even if I consider all Reid plotlines to be the 'A' story).

Should the day come when Diana is in a state of constant physical, mental and emotional struggle, I can see Reid helping her die.  In that circumstance, it would be an act of compassion, and not convenience.  But she's not there yet, so I don't think that is even something to be considered.

[normasm]

1 hour ago, JMO said:

Should the day come when Diana is in a state of constant physical, mental and emotional struggle, I can see Reid helping her die.  In that circumstance, it would be an act of compassion, and not convenience.  But she's not there yet, so I don't think that is even something to be considered.

Yes, I agree. He would never be trying to kill her outright, certainly not as an act of murder to get her out of his way.

I do, however, think Reid would have an awful time of deciding to help her die, though, even if she was in mental and physical agony, mostly because she can't really consent. I think the character of Reid is nothing if not ethical, but who of us really knows what we would do if confronted by the intractable pain of a loved one? I do hope the writers don't attempt to go there.

[Willowy]

I feel like they're either going to 'cure' her (because fiction), or give her a dignified death. The character is pretty important in canon and popular with the fans so I don't think they'd fridge her just for Spence's manpain like they did Maeve. At least I hope not.

My mom just died a few days ago and I was able to spend 4 days with her at her end. I can tell you that after observing her pain up close, you just want the loved one to be free. They cease to be who they were to you and kind of "go inside" themselves, if that makes sense. The hospice nurse was very thorough in explaining to us what was happening to her during each phase. It made a lot of sense and helped tremendously with the emotional part of things for us, the survivors.

In any case, if they do kill her I hope it's done with dignity. Diana deserves that, and Spencer could take comfort in that, as opposed to say her running screaming into traffic or something just as senseless.

[ReidFan]

sorry to hear about your Mom Franky.

[JMO]

I'm sorry for your loss, Franky.  Glad you could be with your mother at the end.  

[normasm]

Sorry for your loss, Franky. I'm glad your (and her) hospice experience was helpful, well-done hospice is truly a blessing.

[Droogie]

Very sorry for your loss, Franky. We always need our mamas. 

[Bookish Jen]

9 minutes ago, Franky said:

I feel like they're either going to 'cure' her (because fiction), or give her a dignified death. The character is pretty important in canon and popular with the fans so I don't think they'd fridge her just for Spence's manpain like they did Maeve. At least I hope not.

My mom just died a few days ago and I was able to spend 4 days with her at her end. I can tell you that after observing her pain up close, you just want the loved one to be free. They cease to be who they were to you and kind of "go inside" themselves, if that makes sense. The hospice nurse was very thorough in explaining to us what was happening to her during each phase. It made a lot of sense and helped tremendously with the emotional part of things for us, the survivors.

In any case, if they do kill her I hope it's done with dignity. Diana deserves that, and Spencer could take comfort in that, as opposed to say her running screaming into traffic or something just as senseless.

As I mentioned before, much love and light to you on your mother's passing.

On-topic: In a perfect world, this Spencer-related arc will be treated with decency and grace. Dramatic elements don't have to be soapy, violent or completely off the rails to be effective. One of the reasons I appreciate Matthew as an actor and director is because he is so nuanced. He doesn't chew the scenery when he acts, and when he directs he uses the elements of mystery and surprise. 

If my dreams could come true, Spencer would find taking care of Diana at his home is overwhelming and even though it breaks his heart, he puts her into a topnotch facility near home where Diana can get the best of care and Spencer can visit his mother and still take care of himself. And if Diana quickly deteriorates, Spencer puts her in a hospice where her final days are treated with compassion and care. Give Spencer, Diana and many of their fans this much...please. I am not playing.

[Willowy]

Thanks all, I do appreciate the condolences. She was a real fireball and an inspiration to the end.

@normasm, too true. It was my first experience with hospice and I really felt that the nurses cared about my mom.

@Bookish Jen, I too hope it happens that way.

[senin]

Sorry for your loss, Franky. 

[thewhiteowl]

Aww, sorry for your loss, Franky. 

[Mom x 3]

Franky, my sincere condolences on your loss.  Should you need it, I highly recommend making use of their bereavement program.  It's just a little extra something for support.  

On topic:  I really hope they don't kill Diana off at this point.  She is having symptoms of early onset Alzheimer's, but overall she is still highly functional and would not be classified as end stage by any means.  

Undercover or not, I just can't see Spencer in jail.  It better be some darned good writing to get me to buy that story.  

[ReidFan]

agreed. I hope they don't kill Diana off either. In fact, I would be surprised if they did...I would think she's quite the ratings enticement.

[Old Dog]

Sorry for your loss Franky. It's been many years since I lost my Mum but I still miss her every day and often find myself thinking "I must tell Mum about that" and then remembering she has long passed on. I'm glad your Mom had such fine care at the hospice.

Edited February 6, 2017 by Old Dog

[iRarelyWatchTV36]

9 hours ago, Franky said:

My mom just died a few days ago and I was able to spend 4 days with her at her end. I can tell you that after observing her pain up close, you just want the loved one to be free. They cease to be who they were to you and kind of "go inside" themselves, if that makes sense. The hospice nurse was very thorough in explaining to us what was happening to her during each phase. It made a lot of sense and helped tremendously with the emotional part of things for us, the survivors.

Condolences for your loss.

I have yet to actually watch this episode, and have to admit that I am dreading it (and the overall arc) a little bit because the subject matter hits very close to home, as has already been mentioned and felt by a lot of others in this thread. 

We lost my grandfather about 10 months ago after a few years' battle with dementia/early-onset alzheimers, and his mother had alzheimers and passed after a very protracted stay in a nursing home many years ago.  We lived with my grandparents for a very long time, so they ended up becoming more like (actual) parental figures.  Watching someone you love slowly lose recognition of time, place, and people - until they've all about completely forgotten things - has to be one of the absolute worst feelings a person can endure while it happens.

Between this disease and cancer, I would consider them both nearly equal among the worst of all the terminal illnesses;  cancer has claimed a few family members, including my mother & grandmother in past 33+ years.

[Old Dog]

So many people have experience of dementia/alzheimers that it is much more common than I used to think. My brother died  2 years ago at only 64 from early onset dementia and watching the man he was rapidly disappear was the most horrifying thing to endure. I only hope they can up the research and try to at least alleviate this awful thing. If I am ever diagnosed I think I would rather have an assisted and dignified death than put my family through it.

Edited February 6, 2017 by Old Dog

[Danielg342]

I'm sorry for your loss, Franky. I lost my mother to breast cancer a year and a half ago and it still stings.

What happened to my mother mirrored this episode a bit. For a while we had the cancer under control and my mother was able to lead a somewhat normal life. She was alive another four years after the diagnosis.

Then it spread to her pancreas and there was nothing we could do. My dad was especially hit, because he's the kind of guy- like Reid- who always had "an answer for everything" but there was no answer to this.

So I give Gubler and Lynch credit for bringing that hopelessness out. On a better written show, I'd be excited for what is to come. Unfortunately, I can only think CM will muck it up.

[smoker]

I'm sorry for your loss Franky.

And I'm sorry for everybody else loss too, even if it happened some time ago. Dealing with the illness and loss of someone you love is always very hard.

[SSAHotchner]

Oh, Franky, I'm so sorry about your mom. It is harder to watch them suffer than to lose them, but the loss and despair are still great. Bless you. 

[Bookish Jen]

I have to give a shout out to the person in props who made up that scrapbook. From the actual scrap book to the contents within, not one part of it rang untrue to me. And I was charmed by the pic of the tightrope walker with Spencer's face glued over the tightrope walker's face, well, actually Matthew's little boy face. So cute!

[Willowy]

1 hour ago, Bookish Jen said:

And I was charmed by the pic of the tightrope walker with Spencer's face glued over the tightrope walker's face, well, actually Matthew's little boy face. So cute!

I thought that was really cute, too. It was something a little boy would actually do. A friend of mine used to glue his face over pics of Freddie Mercury when he was a little boy. Aww.

[autumnmountains]

Sorry about your Mom, Franky. 

I liked the tightrope memory and wonder how the "message" behind it will play out.

[zannej]

I know that one of Reid's degrees was in chemistry. I wonder if he analyzed the medicine he's been giving his mother and checked to see what was in it before he gave it to her. It would seem that he might have the resources to do that.

The mention of medical marijuana reminded me that where I live, it has been legal to use marijuana since the 70s BUT it is illegal to possess marijuana. And if a person uses it, it means they at some point had possession of it.

[iRarelyWatchTV36]

Well, I got through it. 

I think the best way to sum up how the episode played out would be;  Spencer & his mom = Yes!  Team & UnSub = Big Fat No.  Although, I did appreciate (especially) JJ & Rossi, as well as Emily's, concern about Spencer and everything with his mom.

Why can't the PTB and writers just have the team take a 'timeout' and just do backed up paperwork - or something less important - so the majority of the episode can be spent where it should be, on a team member's current personal story?  Every time they switched to Florida, and every second spent there, just had me groaning and wanting Spencer's apartment back on my screen.

Speaking of Spencer and his mom, I guessed it would be, but so hard to not be emotionally affected and sympathize with him as him as he goes through this. 

Thankfully my grandfather never got physically violent, but I do remember dealing with the 'behave one way for a period of time and then some time later, not even seeming like they could ever be that way' hour-to-hour and day-to-day type of life that comes from providing in-home care for a faculties-failing loved one.  ....  And then feeling like a failure and a horrible person when having them moved into a nursing home/ALF because the strain & demands on time became too much.

Edited February 9, 2017 by iRarelyWatchTV36

[MCatry]

So I finally made some time to watch this episode.

The intro was a little bit weird. That med school doesn't look really organised...

Hugh... Too Gubler, little Reid. But at this point, who cares?

New guy: I don't dislike him as much as I dislike the new muscle of the team. Luke something. But I hate Garcia with passion. My world would be so much better without having to hear her ever again. But no. They have to have her to give you the case info. Annoying, to say the least.

Reid not telling the care giver about crazy momma? Not cool.

And I still don't like his apartment. It is always nice to see Ms Diana Reid, no matter how crazy she may be, but I wish they would stop naming her Reid. William the husband dumped her so long ago that she should use her own last name. 

Airplane scene: I think it was pretty funny how the new guys got closer to get the gossip. Apparently that is interesting. At least more than other chatting that could have been going on prior Reid's call.

And here is Garcia again. One cannot even watch Reid without seeing her right there!

JJ interview: rather odd.

The lady with crazy hair which I still can't remember the name and old Rossi at the morgue: those medical staff members are nowadays the only real contact with local law and enforcement... I wish they would cast more people to play police officers and less to play unsubs and victims.

Back to the Reid's...for a smart guy, that's a pretty obvious place to 'hide' the vials. Other than that, I liked the scene.

Prentiss and JJ working the case... Well, that is just wrong. I had a flashback of Hotch, Morgan and Reid. And now that guy I don't like. And victims shouting and being killed with high volume music background. Why can't they just find the bodies? No need to be so over the top...

Two people I couldn't care less on the crime scene. Waiting for the scene to end...

Back to the Reid's: I love Diana. 

Back to the police station without police staff around... New guy, boss and old Rossi cracking the case. Well, not really. That's Garcia's role. I wonder FBI pays so many high salaries to get the job done by one IT technician.

Reid and that lady. Nice dialogue, but then again, Gubler's reactions more than Reid's. 

And there Reid goes again, lying to the carer. Not a smart move.

The annoying muscle is now having a hunch. So he goes away to follow it, while Rossi and JJ go back at talking about Reid. The hell with the case. Well, up to when they are interrupted, because they have to work and deliver the profile.  I wonder when did they discussed it...

On a side note, Rossi's statement felt weird (eventually we become parents to our parents). Reid was parenting Diana since he was a child. Nothing new. 

Hey! Here they are! Police officers, with not a single line, not a word, and even screentime  is robbed from them because they have to show the unsub. Again. 

Interesting thing that they didn't even wait to see how the muscle's hunch would lead to...

And back to the unsub, and another stellar bad acted / directed scene. Could they be more obvious? No, they couldn't. 

So the muscle guy knows about soils. Ok. And Reid and Garcia (and of course they had to had her) working at the distance. One cannot watch Reid alone these days...

So: they think sinkholes may be of some importance? Really? I wonder what was their first clue.

Bathroom scene: finally some acting! Very intense and  well played.

Back to obvious unsub and obvious victim. Good thing it was short.

New guy seems useful. At least he walks the precinct... While the oldies remain sitting somewhere in the police station.

Scrapbook stuff: well, I find it boring, specially with the obvious insertion of Gubler's life again. But it could have been worst. 

Back to discussing the case: drawing a question mark? Really? Back in the old days they will write down characteristics of unsubs and victims and would have pictures of crime scene, instead of having nice pictures of victims looking oh-so-not natural.

And here comes Garcia, interrupting to solve the case. Again: why do we need muscle, new guy, lady with crazy hair, grandpa Rossi, JJ and new boss? According to what I know about FBI salaries, we could easily save a almost a million dollars every year by cutting them down.

Then the Reid's and another short good scene. And hen the ridiculous epiphany about sinkholes and hell and constellations and the geographical position of the next crime. That was even worse than Garcia fining the unsub picture and data. But hey: time is running, and they have to find the unsub before CM time slot is over. So. 

And of course, the victim is saved I'm the last minute and crazy unsub is stopped.

Airplane final scene: besides the 'bad feeling' stuff, which I think it was mandatory because in this show JJ is the mom with special powers to sense stuff brfore they happen, what was Rossi drinking? On a governmental vehicle?

Weird ending. But nice quote.

On the bright side, Diana. Everything else, boring as an old sinkhole. 

[MMC]

Here are the L+3 ratings for this episode. 2.1 demo and 10,186,000 viewers.

So it got a 0.8 increase in it's demo. And a 2,730,000 increase in it's overall viewership.

[ReidFan]

I've never understood the whole ratings thing. Is this a good thing?

[MMC]

27 minutes ago, ReidFan said:

I've never understood the whole ratings thing. Is this a good thing?

Yes it is. Although it'll be the L+7'S that are going to determine how much of a success it really was. I wanted to compare it to the other episodes.But it is rather time consuming to hunt down their ratings. I had planned on using the ratings thread someone had made over at the IMDb. However, for the life of me I seem unable to find that thread at the moment. If I had to guess though I would say this episode is probably on par with the other  episodes  this season.

[ReidFan]

I really wish they would promo "Spencer" more....it deserves a boost

[senin]

I just rewatched the episode, and it was even more emotional than the first time!! 

A lot of us have commented on MGG's performance, but this time I noticed just how good Jane Lynch was. Just an example. After the fight in the bathroom, the slap and everything, she goes to sleep. When she comes back she looks different, she moves in  a different way and, she speaks differently!! 

Something else: The slap was bad, but I think that some of the things she said to Reid were even worse: I hate you, this is not home, who are you, I have to do everything you want... no wonder Reid looked so sad for the whole episode. He knows it's the illness ,but listening to those things from your mother... 

[normasm]

Yes, it was really well written, this portion of the episode (I don't care at all about the rest of it). And well-acted, or else it wouldn't matter much if it was well-written.