Small Talk: Ughngnggh! Ugghhnnn!

[nachomama]

Thankfully I haven't had too much trouble with anybody stealing packages from my doorstep. Although my street numbers are all screwed up. Even and odd numbers on opposite sides of the street, If I'm 1 and across the street is 2 then the neighbor next to them went out of order and became 6 then on the far end of the street is 3 and 5. plus...one end of my street is a dead end. So if you didn't know and your gps is telling you turn right at the next road you think you're on the correct road. So I'm forever getting packages for 11000 avenue when we are 10000 avenue. (anytime there's a temporary mailperson) but if you came from the other end and turn left you're on the right street.

I did get a breast pump delivered to me one time and I got home very late so I took the package inside and was going to drop it off to the correct address in the morning. My cat, being the freakazoid that he was, chews anything cardboard. So he nibbled the box. So it's one thing to try and give packages back, then to explain, oh haha my cat tried to eat it.

Also saw a video of a lady who bought a whole shipment of "undeliverable" packages from amazon. So they've gotten screwed up somehow and amazon either refunded the money or another item got shipped so these are just sitting around in a warehouse. Brand new items, so I guess you bid and she had something like 290 packages. And it's like christmas surprise but obviously you end up with a lot of useless junk.

[OoohMaggie]

2 hours ago, Nashville said:

Yeah, but who’s stupider?  The porch pirate who exposes his vehicle’s license plates to any cameras in the vicinity and then gets the vehicle stuck in front of his would-be victim’s house - or said victim who, after calling the cops, starts trying to advise Dillinger on how to get the car unstuck?

I didn’t realise it was in Canada, I suppose It should have dawned on me when the ‘Canadian’ dude offered the shovel to help extricate the scum from the snow bank, south of the border a shovel would have been brought out to bury the body 😋  I’m only joking people!

 I do agree with AH though, I believe these thieving creatures should be hung from the closest streetlamp to the scene of the crime ☠️

Edited February 24, 2021 by OoohMaggie

[OoohMaggie]

19 hours ago, AngelaHunter said:

All Canadians know how to get out of a snow bank. Luckily this POS did not.

 

I did notice the dude seemed to have an African accent, probably not a lot of snow skills needed over there, Wow,  that homeowner was so damn polite 😱

[OoohMaggie]

22 hours ago, icemiser69 said:

I guess you just have to learn to "go with the flow".

I did think I may have gone too far, it sounded funny when I wrote it, I guess you had to be there 🙄

[nachomama]

Canadians and Hawaiians are much too polite. My roommate from college (Hawaiian) said even criminals say please and thank you. and you know Keifer Sutherland (Canadian) once bumped into a parking meter and apologized to it. (He was also drinking but he still apologized)

[AngelaHunter]

4 hours ago, OoohMaggie said:

I did notice the dude seemed to have an African accent, probably not a lot of snow skills needed over there, Wow,  that homeowner was so damn polite 😱

Yeah. I'm always amazed at anyone going to a foreign country and committing crimes. I wouldn't have the nerve to do so in my own country, never mind another one. But of course, here you can get away with just about anything, even murder. I know that during the war when German POWs were brought to Canada, they were treated so well they didn't want to leave when the war ended.

[AngelaHunter]

5 minutes ago, icemiser69 said:

A multiple choice questionnaire to determine which Star Trek alien you are.

I ended up being Balok (Clint Howard).

I'm a Talosian:

Quote

You've got the biggest brain in the galaxy and a talent for making people see what you want them to. 

😄 I wish!

[Mr. Sparkle]

2 hours ago, icemiser69 said:

A multiple choice questionnaire to determine which Star Trek alien you are.

I ended up being Balok (Clint Howard).  Ron Howard's younger brother.

You are a Talosian!

You've got the biggest brain in the galaxy and a talent for making people see what you want them to. 

On a related note, I love MeTV! The Love Boat! Buck Rogers! Star Trek TOS! 

Edited February 25, 2021 by Superclam

[nachomama]

I may have had a development! I've gotten a few calls lately from flippers interested in buying my house. Obviously low-ball figures so they can whip up a new kitchen and turn a quick profit. Yes my kitchen is old and ugly. My house was built in 1929 I think. It's kinda boring on the outside, has a couple neat things inside but your basic 2 bed 1 bath. When I bought it I certainly thought I had skills and I was gonna make a master bedroom in the attic and really make it an investment...well that didn't turn out quite as I planned. I'm lucky that I even replace floors in the kitchen and bathroom. Put in a dishwasher (even though it's busted now) I've replaced the roof, and the air conditioning. But I am not good at maintanence. I have a dangling light fixture in the bathroom because a light burned out and when I replaced the bulb I noticed the screw thing to put it back up had rusted shut...it's a bathroom light fixture? wouldn't you think it was rust-proof? it goes in a place with water/steam. My ceiling fan in my bedroom has been dead for a while. I'm too scared to try and replace it myself and too cheap to hire someone. Anywho I got an offer that wasn't chump change. I was honest, said my house was in "fair" condition. Certainly needs paint, floors spruced up but mostly everything works. Hopefully the crack in the living room that has been there since day 1 is only old age and not a structural problem. Things I've been avoiding, plumbing in the kitchen but the offer is "as is" so I'd pack just the crap I want and let them figure out the trash from there. I'm not above blaming my sister for the mess. I have furniture from college, things given to me from old roommates, nothing in good shape or worth keeping. I'd take my bed, get new mattresses, a few things here and there but I'd mostly start over and just try not to destroy everything this time. I have been working hard on getting my mortgage down, paying extra so with this offer I would have enough to try and have no mortgage. I would be keeping it very modest but obviously I can't have nice things anyway so why not? They gotta show me the money first.

[Nashville]

16 hours ago, AngelaHunter said:

I'm a Talosian:

Quote

You've got the biggest brain in the galaxy and a talent for making people see what you want them to. 

😄 I wish!

Same here - Talosian.  
Damn.  

I was hoping to be a Tribble - a short happy life of nonstop eating and fucking.  Beat that, I dare ya.

[nachomama]

Worse than a toupee is a merkin. You don't know what Captain Kirk is working with.

[Nashville]

46 minutes ago, nachomama said:

Worse than a toupee is a merkin. You don't know what Captain Kirk is working with.

So... a workin’ merkin?  

[AngelaHunter]

7 hours ago, Nashville said:

I was hoping to be a Tribble - a short happy life of nonstop eating and fucking.

Actually, I believe Dr. McCoy came to the conclusion they were "born pregnant" so you didn't miss out on much. Except the non-stop eating, which these days would make me happy.

[Mr. Sparkle]

A few times, briefly, once in junior high and again when I was like 25 or so. I never got into it. To me, it was just a dice game. 

[nachomama]

We played Call of Cthulu a couple times in college but it was the only role playing thing I ever did. Apparently they were mad when I didnt' want to do it anymore (they didn't have many takers I guess) and it was fun when we did it but yeah it seemed like 1 person's ideas and everyone else just did what they said. So it seemed like a 3rd grader making up rules.

[Nashville]

On 2/26/2021 at 7:02 PM, icemiser69 said:

Back in high school, there were a number of kids that really got into playing Dungeons & Dragons.   I didn't have a lot social interaction, so I didn't partake in that role playing game.   Did any of you ever play that game?

 

I was in a regular group for about 3 years or so in high school; kinda fell out of it once I started college and found other -ah- funner diversions. 😉 

[nachomama]

I got into very few hijinks when I was in college. Almost a complete waste of my youth. sigh. I thought I was very prepared since I had every penny I'd saved since my 9 year old self started a paper route. I signed away nearly every cent on the very first day. Quite frankly if errybody hadn't died right before I started college I wouldn't have made it through my first year. My grandma died 9 days before my mom, so what she left to my mom was given to me and my sisters. Wasn't a tremendous amount, my mother got 1/4 of grandma/granpa's "motel" money. They had owned a "Desert Sands" motel in Hobbs, New Mexico which was practically worthless because they moved the highway. It was no longer on a heavily travelled route. Watch "No Country for Old Men" and I think that one is in El Paso. I laughed my ass off when I watched that movie because in the opening scene Javier Bardem is driving a Ford Granada which was our car when I was a kid. And then Josh Brolin is staying at the Desert Sands motel. Anywho my grandparents sold it and the poor fools who ended up with it had to pay over time because they weren't making any money. But I got 1/12 of that money!

I guess since I was using my own money to pay for college I didn't fritter it away like many college kids do. I think my freshmen year of college I got drunk exactly once. And my goofy roommate from hawaii doesn't deny getting drunk but he absolutely denies eating ketchup on french fries. Kid was "no condiments"; salad was lettuce, carrots and croutons, no dressing. He didn't eat tomato sauce, thus no ketchup or spaghetti. If we ordered pizza he lifted off the cheese and scraped off all the sauce. He was truly bizarre. But we got him drunk and he ate french fries with ketchup, there were witnesses. That's the extent of our wild and crazy. At the end of the school year I was talking to a girl and apparently early on I had made a joke in the elevator about going to my room and reading my bible and they took it literal. The whole year they thought I was a bible thumper and I didn't get invited to any fun shin digs.

[Mr. Sparkle]

38 minutes ago, icemiser69 said:

If anyone is wondering where I got the idea of identical cousins from, here it is.

Anytime I see the phrase "identical cousins" that's exactly where my head goes. Even when someone says the word "cousins" I'll probably sing "identical cousins" in my head. 

[nachomama]

I don't think we ever played a board game correctly. We had "Life" but when we played at other people's houses they paid the taxes and stuff, we never paid unless we actually landed on the pay the tax but it was just something you were supposed to collect. I think we didn't even play CandyLand correctly. I don't think we were cheating cheating just making it up as we went along.

[nachomama]

We had a neighbor who had a game I just loved, loved loved loved. I think it was called "which witch"????? It was like 3 Dimensional. Sort of like a maze and some sort of ball dropped and there were traps that could slam down on you. She had "outgrown" it, she was like 14 and I was like 8 so I think her hanging out with me was some kind of punishment for her when our parents were bbqing or something. Damn I wanted that game.

https://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=https://toytales.ca/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/which-witch.jpg&imgrefurl=https://toytales.ca/which-witch-board-game/&h=650&w=1000&tbnid=vzfkixp9m5XbVM&q=which+witch+game&tbnh=181&tbnw=279&usg=AI4_-kRxj58nF_jNSXcY5Kffd3n_vWymcw&vet=1&docid=GP8YshSw_ZroZM&itg=1&client=firefox-b&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwi-xpzS95bvAhWGwVkKHW-XA8IQ9QF6BAgMEAQ#spf=1614871116460

My cousin Wesley had a shark that you had to dangle a fishing line into and grab junk out of it's mouth before it snapped shut on you. Sort of along the lines of operation where you couldn't touch the walls while performing surgery on your patient. We never had any of those. I had to rely on the kindness of strangers to play those fancy games. No lightbright, no hungry hungry hippoes

We did have the card game for "All in the Family" which was like "Old Maid" you didn't want to get stuck with the "Dingbat" card. and it had all the faces on it, Archie, Edith, Gloria and "Meathead" I obviously played this well before learning how to read because once I started to read I was saying "meeth - head" in my head. Just like I said "BEET-rice" for Beatrice from the Beezus and Ramona books. I still laugh at myself for thinking "what kind of name is BEET rice?" I was not the sharpest tool in the shed. I sure wish I still had the "All in the Family" game though, that might be worth some money. I think we had it because everybody said my dad looked like Archie Bunker and had a nasty attitude to go with it.

[madmax]

2 hours ago, icemiser69 said:

It took me a while but I finally found the board game I was looking for.  It came out in 1989, and as I said before is no longer available.

Nothing on eBay?

My dad bought me a board game once called Creature Features.  It was basically Monopoly, but the properties were horror movies.  I remember the Boardwalk/Park Place squares were King Kong and Godzilla.  I've looked for that game for years, but alas, can't find a copy.

Edited March 5, 2021 by madmax

[Iguessnot]

18 hours ago, madmax said:

Nothing on eBay?

My dad bought me a board game once called Creature Features.  It was basically Monopoly, but the properties were horror movies.  I remember the Boardwalk/Park Place squares were King Kong and Godzilla.  I've looked for that game for years, but alas, can't find a copy.

I loved watching Creature Features when I was growing up Creature Features Intro Video

[madmax]

4 hours ago, Iguessnot said:

I loved watching Creature Features when I was growing up Creature Features Intro Video

We had Chiller Theatre with "Chilly" Billy Cardille.  So cheesy, but so much fun.  

[OoohMaggie]

I hope the snacks are being prepared for that wonderful interview I’m sure you’ll all be riveted to, interview?  Why Harry Hewitt and Maniacal Meghan of course. I am hoping he’ll finally admit to knowing that his fake grandfather did conspire with British secret services to have his mother murdered. Admittedly a bit of an ask, though as long as we get a slice of dirt dished on our resident parasites I’ll be a happy 🐰

[AngelaHunter]

3 hours ago, OoohMaggie said:

I am hoping he’ll finally admit to knowing that his fake grandfather did conspire with British secret services to have his mother murdered.

He better shut his piehole, or the old gal might have him whacked too. Maybe Oprah can get them hooked up with their own sitcom or reality show? I mean, how else will they get jobs? Maybe the sitcom could revolve around the Ginger cuck and his gold digger trying to worm, smuggle, or sneak their way back into the palace. Hilarious hijinks would ensue - you know, like they'll get drenched by the sprinklers, wear funny disguises, crawl into a laundry cart and get dumped down the chute, get chased by the pack of corgis as Benny Hill music plays - stuff like that. We might need canned laughter.

I won't be watching this interview with Oprah puckering up and ass-kissing those two duds as they bitch and whine. I'd rather sit through Negan monologuing about his dick and the intricacies of the sac-tapping game.

[Mr. Sparkle]

6 hours ago, OoohMaggie said:

I hope the snacks are being prepared for that wonderful interview I’m sure you’ll all be riveted to, interview?  Why Harry Hewitt and Maniacal Meghan of course. I am hoping he’ll finally admit to knowing that his fake grandfather did conspire with British secret services to have his mother murdered. Admittedly a bit of an ask, though as long as we get a slice of dirt dished on our resident parasites I’ll be a happy 🐰

I can say with full certainty that I will NOT be watching this. I'm sure I'll hear enough about it in the next few weeks. 

[OoohMaggie]

3 hours ago, AngelaHunter said:

I won't be watching this interview with Oprah puckering up and ass-kissing those two duds as they bitch and whine

Don’t know if it’s true, but I did read somewhere that Markle the sparkle had somehow managed to piss Oprah right off by something she’d done, the thought being that as Winfrey has total editorial control, she might keep in something that would have invariably ended up on the cutting room floor. I do hope that I’m not coming across as someone in deep desperation for some shit to hit the fan, I really am a royalist 😇

[AngelaHunter]

1 hour ago, OoohMaggie said:

Don’t know if it’s true, but I did read somewhere that Markle the sparkle had somehow managed to piss Oprah right off

Better not piss off Oprah. She has more power than nearly anyone on the planet.

This had me in tears of laughter at the time, and it's not any less funny now. The thing is, you wonder if it was dubbed at all:

 

[AngelaHunter]

3 hours ago, icemiser69 said:

I don't know about that.  I have known a few people that back in the day would watch her show on a daily basis, and now when they reflect back on those days, they don't feel the same way about her.

I haven't watched her for maybe 20 years and don't even know if her show is still on. That she unleashed those two smarmy quacks, Phil and Oz, (yes, I know many people love them) on society can never be forgiven.

In those 20 years, I've watched 4 series, all of them on HBO or Showtime.  Well, except TWD which I wish had been put on one of those channels, if only to eliminate the dizzying, infuriating number of commercials.

I did just finish watching an 8-part series on the BBC, called "The Serpent", about serial killer Charles Sobhraj. It is truly a quality production, IMO.

[Nashville]

On 3/4/2021 at 6:15 PM, icemiser69 said:

It took me a while but I finally found the board game I was looking for.  It came out in 1989, and as I said before is no longer available.

Okay... so describe it to us already.

[Nashville]

 

On 3/5/2021 at 2:54 PM, Iguessnot said:

I loved watching Creature Features when I was growing up Creature Features Intro Video

I’ve seen this one before, but it’s not the Creature Feature I grew up with; that honor(?) belongs to Sir Cecil Creape.

[Mr. Sparkle]

We had this. Scared the shit outta me. 

 

[Iguessnot]

4 hours ago, Nashville said:

 

I’ve seen this one before, but it’s not the Creature Feature I grew up with; that honor(?) belongs to Sir Cecil Creape.

Goodness. He's worse than Svenghoolie. I understood what the hosts were doing but they were interrupting my movie watching pleasure. The Chicago Creature Feature intro got you in the mood for a scary movie.

[nachomama]

We just had Elvira. Or Dialing for dollars movies in the afternoon.

I hate my sister with every fiber of my being. I mentioned she's in the big Texas storm, no power, no water. I'm still getting my dead sisters electric bill, we haven't made the big switch to get it into dumbass' name. So her credit ran out from the charity that had been paying it. She owed $85 something. I let her know and she rambled about paying the cable etc etc. She doesn't talk to me for 3 months and then only tells me what she wants to and so I didnt' fully understand what she said. Instead of sending the money to the electric company, she wired it to me at Walmart. It's like western union but just Walmart to Walmart. How is this convenient for anyone?????? why the ever living fuck she did that? I have no idea, seems incredibly stupid to me. I believe you can pay your utilities at virtually every walmart and grocery store. She said "we had no mail service because of the storm" yes....but the mail would come back within a week. No one was going to fault you for being a week late because of the storm. She was also going to let them cut off her cable and I told her no, they would charge her to re-install it later and was under contract yada yada. The solution is NOT  to just let them turn it off. So I get a late notice on the electric and I say "didn't you send them the money?" She's all, no I sent it to you. She said she is debit card only and the local office is closed because of the pandemic. She won't put a banking app on her phone because it can get hacked too easily. I said people been paying their bills online for 10+ years never once been hacked. IF it's your banking app it's FDIC insured you can prove you sent it, blah blah. So now I'm the bad guy for not paying her bill and yelling at her because she's so incredibly frikkin stupid. I need to drink more.

[OoohMaggie]

19 hours ago, icemiser69 said:

That is probably not a good idea, you'd be mightily disappointed. As I said before, I found the game.

Even someone on the other side of the Atlantic, who wouldn’t recognise the game from a hole in the floor wants to know what the hell it is your talking about,  C’mon, stop messing about, what’s it called 🙄

[madmax]

Here's a question:

At what age does one stop wearing T-shirts with pictures/sayings and move into the more sedate plain ones?

Asking for a friend...

[AngelaHunter]

7 minutes ago, madmax said:

Here's a question:

At what age does one stop wearing T-shirts with pictures/sayings and move into the more sedate plain ones?

Asking for a friend...

Well, if you watch court shows (yeah, I know but it's my thing. Leave it alone) the answer would be "never".  Even a mature father of three would be proud to sport a "Beer is Fun", or "Fuck the police" T-shirt in that venue.

I might wear an old one with the name of some holiday place I've visited - I do like my "Boca Raton" shirt -  but only at home. Some things, like jeans with rips in them, super-short skirts/shorts, T-shirts with rude sayings or cartoons on them should be ditched after one reaches majority age. What looks cute on an 18-year-old just looks sloppy or pathetic on a 30+-year-old. But maybe that's just me being a fuddy-duddy.

[Mr. Sparkle]

1 hour ago, madmax said:

Here's a question:

At what age does one stop wearing T-shirts with pictures/sayings and move into the more sedate plain ones?

Asking for a friend...

I don't know for sure, but apparently 53 is not the answer. 

[madmax]

2 hours ago, Superclam said:

I don't know for sure, but apparently 53 is not the answer. 

Do you know this is EXACTLY the answer I -- uh, my friend -- was looking for.   😆

Edited March 10, 2021 by madmax

[nachomama]

I used to have a tshirt with dinosaurs in kama sutra positions, damn I loved that shirt. I'll wear whatever, I am the people of walmart.

For the life of me I cannot understand why my mother purchased us Farrah Fawcett and Bo Derek shirts when I was a kid. Wouldn't those have been for boys? My sister got Farrah with the famous hair and I got Bo Derek, I guess with equally famous hair, it was CORN ROWS! The why's just don't stop. Why the hair? Why the shirt? For the life of me I couldn't understand from that picture why Bo Derek was considered the worlds hottest woman. I didn't like it then and I don't like it now and I think the shirt tainted (I said taint) my vision of the world from that point.

[OoohMaggie]

17 hours ago, icemiser69 said:

You're already over the Harry and Meghan interview? 

To be honest I couldn’t bear watching those insufferable people, I just waited for the nauseating highlights to be shown 🤢

[Mr. Sparkle]

5 hours ago, icemiser69 said:

Before you start asking about pants, it is never a good look for anyone to wear pants that have the word "juicy" across the butt cheek part of their pants.   Juicy congers up images of someone that has the squirts.

You've never been to my neighborhood, where you're underdressed if you don't have something written across your ass. 

1 hour ago, OoohMaggie said:

To be honest I couldn’t bear watching those insufferable people, I just waited for the nauseating highlights to be shown 🤢

Me neither. I really don't know why anyone gives a f about either side. But it sure seems like a lot of people do. 

[madmax]

4 hours ago, nachomama said:

I used to have a tshirt with dinosaurs in kama sutra positions, damn I loved that shirt. I'll wear whatever, I am the people of walmart.

Sounds like a cool shirt!!

Mine are mostly zombie or Snoopy related.  None that are horribly offensive, unless you're a zombie.

[nachomama]

At the call center where I use to work, all the girls had the Victorias secret "pink" accoutrements. Sweats, sweaters, socks, tshirts. Head to toe "pink" slapped everywhere on their bodies. It was like their Sunday best outfits. Part of me wanted to have a word with the ladies....Do not pay for dis ish...this is the "man" keeping you down. On one hand it wasn't lingerie but if you buying what they sellling hook, line and sinker...they own you. No No No girl. They can do what they want with their money that just seemed like a huge waste to me. I'm wearing my $5 tshirt and you're about $300 in for the whole outfit.

[OoohMaggie]

6 hours ago, Superclam said:

Me neither. I really don't know why anyone gives a f about either side. But it sure seems like a lot of people do. 

I absolutely agree about those not living in the UK, why should they give a f either way?  But when the hard earned wages of UK citizens are taxed, and that tax is used to fund the luxurious lifestyles of generation upon generation of parasites, then we become agitated 😡

[OoohMaggie]

3 hours ago, icemiser69 said:

I don't think anyone will be offended with a Snoopy shirt unless he is pictured dragging his ass on the rug.

You had to mention it! 😋

 

Edited March 10, 2021 by OoohMaggie

[Mr. Sparkle]

14 minutes ago, OoohMaggie said:

I absolutely agree about those not living in the UK, why should they give a f either way?  But when the hard earned wages of UK citizens are taxed, and that tax is used to fund the luxurious lifestyles of generation upon generation of parasites, then we become agitated 😡

I'm sure that's true, but aren't there many people in the UK who absolutely worship them? I can't believe there aren't. 

[AngelaHunter]

1 hour ago, OoohMaggie said:

 But when the hard earned wages of UK citizens are taxed, and that tax is used to fund the luxurious lifestyles of generation upon generation of parasites, then we become agitated

We still have her pic on our money which makes me  glad I never use cash anymore. I guess it's easy to live to be 100 when never in your life - from cradle to grave -  do you ever have to take a bus, job hunt, pay for clothes (not the designer type either) or utilities, go to work in all weather, shop for groceries, scramble for childcare, pony up for a mortage, or ever have to think about how to pay bills.  I'm sure all the commoners don't mind giving most of their hard-earned wages to support this lifestyle. And poor little Meghan. My heart bleeds for her.

[Nashville]

On 3/9/2021 at 5:20 PM, Superclam said:

I don't know for sure, but apparently 53 is not the answer. 

Neither is 58, apparently.

[ParadoxLost]

10 hours ago, icemiser69 said:

I was listening to First Wave over on Sirius XM, and my gosh there is one band that gets played way too much.  And by way too much, I mean one song is way too much for me.  The Smiths,  It may just be me, but every song of theirs that I have heard pretty much sounds the same.

Girlfriend in a coma. I know.  I know.  Its serious.

Don't provoke the earworms.