S06.E08: Guitar Man

[statsgirl]

This episode was about Kevin's growth and for much of that Cassidy's story was the vehicle. What she went through, what she's still going through, showed him that what he thinks of as hardship in his life isn't really. It leads him to see how he can do good with a vet construction company, it may also have contributed to his handling the twins better at the end of the episode; as Kate told him, he just needed more confidence with them.  Kevin gets my vote as the Pearson most possible to get over himself.

It's true that Kevin couldn't do any good by staying in the hospital overnight and maybe he knew that.  I saw it as Kevin wanting to be there for Cassidy and maybe do penance after Nicky showed him how he had failed Cassidy by his anger at her and not seeing how much trouble she was in.

Cassidy's speech in the hospital was well written as well as well acted. That she wanted to end her life after a warm, happy evening can strikes true to people who have experienced the 'black dog' of depression.  To go from that happiness to the following days when the family atmosphere would be gone and her son leave her to go to his father again must have been wrenching. And hopeless.

I liked that from Cassidy's flashbacks, it appears that her PTSD is from moral injury, when one is forced to do something that they perceive as morally wrong. PTSD from moral injury doesn't get nearly enough attention.

The Big Three are all so self-involved, it's nice to see that Kevin at least can go beyond it.

[debraran]

5 hours ago, statsgirl said:

This episode was about Kevin's growth and for much of that Cassidy's story was the vehicle. What she went through, what she's still going through, showed him that what he thinks of as hardship in his life isn't really. It leads him to see how he can do good with a vet construction company, it may also have contributed to his handling the twins better at the end of the episode; as Kate told him, he just needed more confidence with them.  Kevin gets my vote as the Pearson most possible to get over himself.

It's true that Kevin couldn't do any good by staying in the hospital overnight and maybe he knew that.  I saw it as Kevin wanting to be there for Cassidy and maybe do penance after Nicky showed him how he had failed Cassidy by his anger at her and not seeing how much trouble she was in.

Cassidy's speech in the hospital was well written as well as well acted. That she wanted to end her life after a warm, happy evening can strikes true to people who have experienced the 'black dog' of depression.  To go from that happiness to the following days when the family atmosphere would be gone and her son leave her to go to his father again must have been wrenching. And hopeless.

I liked that from Cassidy's flashbacks, it appears that her PTSD is from moral injury, when one is forced to do something that they perceive as morally wrong. PTSD from moral injury doesn't get nearly enough attention.

The Big Three are all so self-involved, it's nice to see that Kevin at least can go beyond it.

When I was young, I watched a MASH episode where a soldier was in hospital with a "mental" injury more than physical. He thought he was Christ and his commander thought he was faking and weak. The psychiatrist said he broke because he didn't want to drop bombs anymore, he didn't want to hurt children and "Christ" wouldn't. I remember asking my dad why he just couldn't stop and he said it wasn't that easy especially back then. You followed orders and put in your time or faced other punishments. I don't think there is more PTSD now, but I do feel we didn't know about it then or hid it or just drank or used other coping mechanisms more.

[Scout Finch]

On 3/16/2022 at 11:25 AM, marceline said:

I agree with you on the general point but what I do appreciate about Cassidy's story is that it shows that mental illness is not a "one and done" thing. (Is PTSD considered mental illness? If not, I apologize for the mischaracterization.) As someone who has dealt with depression for most of my adult life, I could really relate to Cassidy wanting to live in that last happy memory. I also remember how my own suicidal ideation snuck up on me.

It was while I was driving. It was my evening commute. I was on the highway, it started to turn and suddenly I thought "What if I don't turn the steering wheel? What if I just drive into the barrier?" That's when I realized I needed help.  And I didn't have the added complication of military service. 

We've all pointed out the flaws in this ep but I thought that scene was well done and I hope it will help others. It helped remind me how far I've come since that day in my car.

~Hugs~ I've been in that exact situation a few times in my 58 years. My other suicidal ideation is about taking a bunch of pills; however, it almost always ends with the thought of someone finding me in time, which means that I don't really want to die but just want to get help.

This isn't going to sound like something to laugh about but I always thought that when my mother died I'd either kill myself or have a mental breakdown that I most likely would never recover from. So, in 2019, as she was dying I decided that I would kill myself when she was gone. But not right away...first, I had to handle her house and belongings. Then, I would also need to do the same with my apartment so I wouldn't leave a ton of stuff for my friends to have to take care of. Oh, and I'd also need to find a home for my two cats. Okay, so I wouldn't do it right now but I was definitely going to...just postponing it for several months until after I had taken care of all of these responsibilities.

Even as I was swearing to myself that I was definitely going to do it in the future the dark humor side of me was also aware of the absurdity! In all likelihood, by then I would have realized, hey, I survived and would no longer be in that state of mind (although I have dealt with depression most of my life). While I still miss her every single day, I think it's hilarious now that I was just too damn responsible! Which was a good thing.

Edited April 9, 2022 by Scout Finch

[KittyQ]

On 3/30/2022 at 3:30 AM, debraran said:

I don't think there is more PTSD now, but I do feel we didn't know about it then or hid it or just drank or used other coping mechanisms more.

I think you are right about this. My father fought in WWII and Korea with a brief stint in Viet Nam, and I know that he had nightmares and emotional difficulties over the years. I don't think at that time there was much treatment for anyone who wasn't completely incapacitated. 

To link back to this story, what Nicky and Cassidy remember would be so hard for anyone else to relate to, so it is not surprising that they feel alone at times.