pakalolo

Honestly, they had more chemistry than any other Teen Mom or 16 & Pregnant couple I can think of. Janelle and Kieffer are maybe the only other couple that seemed to have anything interesting going on between their nasty, unwashed sheets. It's a wonder how so many of those babies were made with such little actual attraction we see between any of them.

Since Simon looks so high every time I see him on camera I just assumed Farrah's recent personality makeover was due to her pre-camera bong hits and some eye drops.

There's no graceful arch, just perfect surprised parentheses. *Another* Teen Mom related t-shirt line? I hope he designs shirts that have pockets made out of bacon.

I really doubt she's actually playing on the slip and slide because the picture appears to be taken from inside the house.

Bronte has a math degree and is working on her doctorate but can't memorize her times tables? "Solving integrals like nobody's business" is like second year math at the most. Sounds fishy to me. Also, at the end of her interview she has something to say to all the "seminaters?" What does that mean?

So Farrah wants to be matched with a millionaire? She's not the millionaire herself, right? Farrah has gone so overboard on the fillers in that photo her face now looks like her body is obese, its gone from plumping up fine lines or filling in cheeks to just looking like straight up fat. I fully expect her to become a plastic surgery oddity similar to Jocelyn Wildenstien within a year or so.

N&J SWOLEMATES IRON KITTEN

Interesting, I just happen to be going to Seattle for a week in August and have to find ways to amuse myself during work hours...will they still be filming then?

Kinda late but here's my 2 cents on the broken wheelchair. From what we've seen Leah seems to be a messy hoarder; I have an acquaintance that should be at least using a walker or possibly even a wheelchair at this point but there is no possible way she could use either of those in her grossly overhoarded house or transport them in her hoarded vehicle, she only has room to use a cane and will probably become bed ridden soon because she refuses to let anyone remove her piles of garbage. I'm guessing the wheelchair was broken trying to maneuver around a pile of floor Cheetos and empty Lunchable boxes and since Leah doesn't want to spend time keeping wide paths clean and probably never set aside enough time in her last minute shit-show of a morning schedule to load it onto the car she was relived she didn't have to deal with it anymore and left it broken. Doesn't explain why Corey didn't try to get the wheelchair repaired though.

I was doing a few things at once so I may not have seen correctly but did Celia determine the wrong drug was given to her dog by Licking The Syringe?

I agree, but how does one go into the competition with an idea for a "modern, fresh, young, hip" baroque dress? I also fail see how baroque and "modern, fresh, young, and hip" can even be accomplished. Can anyone here Google me a proper picture of a truly "modern, fresh, young, hip" baroque dress for reference? Is it even possible? Can I also say just how sick I am of hearing them harp on about how "modern, fresh, young, and hip" everything is or isn't.

I had to pause the DVR to look at that picture and laugh. To me they appeared to have red lipstick smeared all around their mouth and were making exaggerated duck lips, one of the guys also had his tank top pulled down on one side to reveal a band aid covered nipple. I had no idea there were that many people involved in filming a single storyline though. It kills me to agree with Farrah, but that many men using my bathroom all day sounds gross and I sure wouldn't want to clean it.

It was 2:30am and she was leaving Simon at the hotel to "go to her friend's house in the Hamptons??" Who leaves their "boyfriend" at the hotel to take a cab to someone else's house at 2:30 in the morning? Sounds like something a prostitute would do, is that why Simon is still with her? Is he her pimp? That would make so much more sense.

So what was up with Ron's "son"? A grown person freaked the fuck out completely irrationally over a single caged snake to the point where he had to immediately run to his car and drive away without even being able to discuss it or anything. He never even returns to help clean and it was just kinda glossed over and forgotten about about for the rest of the episode. That's just really weird.

The best thing about that list is that it didn't make me click through and wait to load a new page for each roommate.

Her hair is so thin I don't think she can spare any for bangs and it still wouldn't change her giant lightbulb shaped head anyway. Still, she is always super thin and wears tight clothes and that's often number one in what a large portion of guys look for in a "hot" woman. I used to work with a girl that was stick thin and painted her clothes on just like Maci but had the face of Freddy Krueger and she was still the most popular topic of discussion among the young, dumb, and full-of-cum boys.

For real? I must have missed that, this was the guy she met at WalMart, right? He turned out to be a sex offender? Was that why they broke up? Was this mentioned on the show or found in online records or something?

When Farrah was hassling Debra about taking care of Sophia while she on "UK business" she said she didn't want Sophia to deal with the same "irritations" she had to while growing up. Now I know in Miss Word Salad's head irritation could be a euphemism for sexual abuse, but that's certainly not the term I would chose. I have no doubt Farrah was abused by her parents as a child but I believe it was severe mental abuse by Debra and neglect by Michael. Edit: Noticed Fozzy Bear and I pretty much typed the same thing at the same time.

There really isn't a whole lot of options for someone as large as Gary, is there? (Second word my autocorrect suggested for Gary was Fart, y'all!) I have a feeling I see that same grey t-shirt on a lot of obese men.

Yeah, I wasn't really sure how it would help, I just suggested something while the juxtaposition of funny snark and stark reality was fresh in my brain before really thinking it through. I know most of what we snark on here is really kind of sad if you think about it too hard, but the new revelation about Matt's past is just beyond my abilities to spin into light afternoon internet discussions about my guilty pleasure reality shows and I was just thinking of a way to corral it. If that makes sense.

Yup, I'm out. I can't comment on this or Amber's relationship with Matt anymore. It just stopped being fun. I'm still here to talk shit about all the other Teen Moms on other threads though, that will continue to be my daily weird indulgence of superficiality and snark. Maybe a separate thread can be made for Matt and all his icky stuff and we can keep this one for when Amber gets back to her senses and leaves this monster?

Ha, I just guessed Butch was always in prison/jail on their birthdays.

Rent-a-Center? Maybe MTV springs for it so the producers have somewhere to sit besides the floor and still stay out of the shot? Or Rent-a-Center cause they are all trashy and bad with money and do that kind of thing instead of investing in quality furnishings?

I would have an easier time believing that had she not permanently disfigured her face and body as she has, it just screams disfunction at me.

"Tyler's Uppity Bouffant" is going to be the name of my next album.