kitcloudkicker

I love Pretty Little Liars as my campy, guilty pleasure show so I had high hopes for Janel. And I still do - it was only week 1 after all, and I still think she has potential. But I figured out what it was that bugged - she comes off a little Rachel Berry-ish. It was like having Rachel Berry from Glee on Dancing With the Stars.

Honestly, probably height - she was the tallest female celeb and he was the tallest pro. For ballroom they really don't like matching a taller female with a shorter male, and that left them with pretty much only Tony or Keo as partners for her, no? And to be fair, on paper they seemed like a potentially hot couple (if they just stood next to each other, and didn't have to be in motion.)

I don't know that I see Janel and Val "showmancing," Janel seems like the kind of person who says "I love you" to everyone, and is over-the-top flirty and handsy with everyone. It doesn't read to me like they're trying to "sell" anything. (Case in point: Janel with boyfriend after the show, Janel being cutesy with a different platonic friend) That said, she's way more intense than I was hoping she'd be - I was hoping she'd be more silly/fun and I think she might want it a little too hard at the moment - she might need to dial it back a bit.

Yeah, I think Lolo was bringing up the prop issue with Betsey to say, "It was my fault I screwed up my dance, so I deserve to go home. Betsey's dance got screwed up because of forces outside of her control, so she deserves to stay. I agree with this result." She just said it in a very awkward, hard to watch way.

Eliminated pros stick around to dance bumpers and with musical guests, right? Keo needs to stick around!

I'm inclined to give people a pass on "bitchfaces," especially the ones not experienced in needing to be "ON" to read well on live camera. I know my "I'm so nervous I'm trying not to throw up" face likely looks very close to a "bitch face." Lolo came across as just a very odd, defensive person. I watched it after reading some comments and expected her to be argumentative/defensive and it more came across as defensive weirdness - she wasn't arguing the judges comments, she just wouldn't. Stop. Talking. But agreed on the painful to watch. Janel did a little worse than I expected (she might suffer from "wanting it too hard" and or "overenthusiastic theatre kid" syndrome), and Bethany did better. Pretty much agreed on all the highlights, Randy (surprising), Sadie (more enjoyable than I expected, I don't mind her sticking around a bit like she likely will), Chong (I really like him with Peta! She gets to show off her spunk). Alfonso knocked it out of the park. I really don't understand the appeal of Antonio, but I guess he's out of my demographic? I found him completely bland and forgettable. I liked Julianne when she was just giving critique, but she is kind of painful when she tries to be clever or funny.

Betsey & Tony: Also Cha Cha https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DG0rirdXGA4&list=UULOIoa2aEGcM-z1hJx4vy4w And PureDWTS has Jonathan & Allison as Jive

Oh I don't think she's "the most" anything - but she's clearly something, in a market that can no longer be written off as "just the internet." I mean, that commercial clocks her at 5 million subscribers, so if she was launched from that she already had a decent springboard. (And trust, I'm not defending her. One, this is clearly a PR move to promote her new perfume, or whatever (though really, no fault in that, that's the business). And two, she seems to have gotten her start doing haul videos, which is one of the teen internet fads that gets me sucked into Google rabbit holes of "Whaaaaaat the hell is this, I'm horrified by the vapid consumerism, but kind of get how this could spring out of teen girls sharing tips and figuring out how to be people?" And then I read way too many thinkpieces overanalyzing the whole phenomenon.) Long story short, Teen Internet and New Media is kind of fascinating to me, even when I don't really get it, it's interesting to me to see it crash into a network show, moreso than with a reality star. Even when that New Media personality is one of the blandest ones that could have picked. (That's what makes it MORE fascinating. She seems so bland! But so popular! Why are there even 10 people watching videos of her put on Neutrogena® face lotion, let alone 5 million? It reminds me of the criticism of Twilight that the main character had no personality so that all the girls reading it could picture themselves as the lead.) Anyway, I still think this season belongs to Alfonso, and I stand by that I think he & Witney and Janel & Val are going to be the most fun to watch. And I'm interested to see what Allison and Keo can do. (I'm dreading that Keo and Lolo will get a, "Will the dancer seduce the virgin?" edit, which will be profoundly irritating).

I had never heard of Bethany Mota either (and I went to her channel and it mostly made me feel very old, especially the video where it's just her wandering around her house, showing off branded product placements in the weirdest, most boring commercial ever - no seriously, how is that 5 million views worth of interesting?) but she's got the cover of Seventeen this month, and ranked higher than Leonardo DiCaprio on this Variety poll of celebs teens recognize. (Though yes, lower than Jenna Marbles, who besides the Fine Brothers and Michelle Phan were the only ones on that list I had ever come across before.) I'm kind of interested to see how she does. It's sort of the Wild West of new media, I mean, I pretty much only watch Dancing with the Stars on YouTube, dances get uploaded almost immediately, with enough time to vote even (though maybe not by phone?) I imagine the appeal of her for teens is like a relatable friend or slightly older sister who gives you advice, and if her demographic already feels like they are "friends" they might be more inclined to vote? I will say though, even though I actually have come around to liking Derek, I fear her brand of perky "cuteness" will mesh with his mugging nature and end up being a giant pile of insufferable.

I hope we'll get some breakin' and poppin'. (But fun and safe breakin' and poppin'. Not the things you shouldn't be doing. Tell Mom & Dad.)

Thoughts on spoiler-ed pairs:

I don't know if this is spoiler or speculation, but I'm going to tag it just in case.

I think it was during the Kellie season though, that I felt like I noticed him chilling out - and it seemed to be because she called him on it. I didn't notice that many moments with Amber - but I may be mis-remembering. (Or he could have gotten a favorable edit, who knows.) He seems to get the most annoyed when celebrities can't keep up with his nonstop pace, which is why I'm thinking an unathletic YouTube star might be more of a test for his patience than a track and field star. Also - given that Lolo is tall, I think she's out as a Derek partner. I'm going to speculate she goes to the new guy, Keo.

I think Derek's really Zenned out since then - Amy cried and walked out of rehearsals an awful lot and he seemed to handle it by pretty much let her get it out of her system, or giving her hugs and performing stupid cheesy "comedy" skits to distract her. He also handled NeNe pretty well. I can remember finding him kind of arrogant and twirpy in early seasons, and I have to say, he's still cheesy but it's a more Tony Robbins kind of cheesy. I mainlined through a ton of DWTS videos on YouTube last spring when I was procrastinating on my thesis and was kind of impressed with his growth. I don't doubt that some of it's media training, but there seems to be a lot of genuine sentiment behind it. That said, it might be interesting to see how he does with someone more "unlikeable." I mean, maybe I've been fooled and he could crack. I'd be more interested though in seeing what he could do with someone who's completely uncoordinated, not an athlete or a performer. I don't know anything about the YouTube girl, but if she's that, that match could be interesting.

Adrenalized Hyperreality Mona?! That'd be fun! She can use her super strength and ability to be in 15 places at once to go far on the show. (She's also super tiny - so a potential Mark pairing?)

Eh, I don't know that I buy Julianne will be tougher, but I don't buy that it's some massive advantage for him either. In her last few appearances, she's kept her remarks on the celebrity when she's judging Derek - that is something I could see her being more conscious of. I'm also still not convinced that the judges scores do a damn thing in swaying the outcome of the show. Are they going to hand out an 8, 9, or a 10, oooooh the suspense! I do wish they'd show more behind the scenes, instead of judge yapping, and not all that jazzed about the potential more time for that. But of the 4, I find Bruno by far the most annoying.

Since they seem committed to keeping contemporary in as a style - perhaps that's why - to get better contemporary. I miss the pasos too, but they seem to get the a lot of buzz off the big contemporarish numbers (Let it Go, Only Human, Max & Meryl's finale piece...) If I'm a producer it certainly seems to make sense as a strategic decision.

I'm certainly not an expert, and I wish I could remember in what interviews with what people I've heard this mentioned, but I feel like I've been hearing in a couple places that the dance world in general is trending towards more fusion/blending between styles. Personally, I love the creativity of it (DWTS only piqued my interest when they started doing more of it & I'm excited to see what Allison can do), though I get that it annoys the purists.

ESPN has the full gallery up, with two more of Amy: http://espn.go.com/espn/photos/gallery/_/id/11143740/image/44/amy-purdy-bodies-want

I think they were just trying to get to the fact that by "being herself" Riley can balance out some of Maya's "more destructive" impulses - which is a role that Cory tended to play for Shawn in the original series. (Something about a cherry bomb in a mailbox? I have vague memories of that plotline having that message.) It didn't quite square in the way it played out in the pilot. But I chalked up a lot of the clunkiness being from pilots just generally being awkward - combined with the fact that they had to square two different audiences, the old nostalgia fans and the new ones. I thought they did pretty okay, considering. I was caught off guard by how much I enjoyed seeing Cory and Topanga back together. The girl that plays Maya though - I could have sworn she looked so familiar, but I think its just that she's a dead ringer for Britt Robertson, who I know from Netflix binges of terrible teen dramas.

I took it as showing that the mom was so sensitive to racial "othering" that she was completely missing other social cues - as well as developmental issues that Suzanne was having. Basically white guilt gone overboard, well intentioned but ultimately problematic and doing no favors for Suzanne.

I saw someone else online mention Cuban, and for some reason that made a lot of sense to me based on how she was styled in her flashbacks. (Hopefully I am not horribly stereotyping Cubans. But it was in a retro-cool kind of way!)

This seems to be a pretty clear theme of Piper's storyline this season, dishonesty in all it's WASPy forms. It's even in the flashback with her Grandmother in the first episode:

I'm going to go ahead and predict Caputo is out as the one in charge (with the everyone escaping on his watch and all), which sets up a new assistant warden to be a main antagonist for the season.

But also! Maybe my favorite of all: "O'Neill! Scatter the nuns!" "RUN, NUNS, RUN!"