Grifter Lives

So, the great moral philosopher Chuck concludes Andre's corruption was necessary, because Moldova's such a poor country. Yet, Andre's father doesn't seem to be suspected of any corruption at any time in his life. Oh, and Chuck's a slumlord - he can rationalize the morality of that, too.

I think that she was already 28 or 29, I think, and really wanted to have children. I don't buy her story that they discussed losing her or their virginity to him or each other. She loves being a mother, and she babies Asuelo, too.

In the rare scenes where she's not berating, scolding and humiliating Michael, including threats of physical violence, she's inappropriately squealing and flapping her fat in delight. She did it when the florist told her to spend more money on the larger bouquet and in earlier episodes. That might have been her signature move 40 years and 100 pounds ago and she still thinks its cute or endearing. (It absolutely isn't.) Her repertoire also includes smoking and slugging Coke or alcohol.

Molly defends Jihoon's watching both children, because that was her plan for Luis. And, because nobody likes Elicia.

Will we still care by then? I bet we will, if we only have B90 Strikes Back and the Darceys in the interim.

I'm going to add it to my DVR now.

I think that this is why we're living a mid-season finale. One of the couples - the Cheesesticks or Brit & Yazan - are over. Totally my speculation.

The bitterness set in young and fast on Melyza. She's going to destroy herself. (Not that she should reconcile with Cheesestick.)

Yazan's sister was Brittany's sister's neighbor. Wouldn't having a child be the easiest lie to call out?

Jihoon suppressed his endzone dance that Elicia is gone.

Drascilla looks like a messy, demonic pilgrim in that outfit.

Speaking of deep depression/vagina, here' Deavan.

Is Jenny wearing a pajama top?

Which one was yours? Congratulations!

Ash: I'm not self-proclaimed. You're self-proclaiming myself." How is that even possible? So, I'm guessing he has no certification from Love Coach U..

Ash: Heart, Guts, whatever you might call it. He failed anatomy. I hope that's not a topic in his love-coaching curriculum.

Ash is already defensive, which is why he's manspreading. Next, he'll man-splain.

Darcy's on a romantic date, and the man with his face blurred behind them is reading a newspaper.

He played his part for the first talking heads, but then he started laughing too hard at the insults about his body, crying victimhood, and then he blatantly lied and showed his hatred for Rose. "She didn't get what she wanted. Which was good for me," with his overly smug expression.

Rose finally provided non-annoying commentary. She'll reverse herself after this scene. She lost her dignity in this spinoff.

Mothra will choke David with his tail to claim the millions in inheritance. But, suddenly, the cat disappeared in the next scene.

Michael did get a boutonneire. In white, to represent his bride, just like the $90 bouquet.

Yolanda keeps on talking about how she loves muscular guys. But, she's not their equivalent. I'm sure she's got loose skin everywhere, since she dropped 100 pounds after a sedentary life. She needs to lose her delusion and accept that David is her dating equal. I'm going to contact Dr. Smith about my commission for tonight's show, because I'm going to refer her to him for skin tightening, and she'll be upsold for a mommy makeover, earlobe repair and several facial procedures. (She's that gullible.)

I don't remember Robert's "thirsty as hell" remark, but it's true.

Yolanda and her daughter sit in the same, closed pose, hunched over.