BusyOctober

Did anyone catch the first episode? The Italian restaurant with putrid veal and ancient mystery meats in the freezer? That guy was a disaster. Screaming at everyone one minute, then crying and blubbering about how he disappointed daddy the next. As fo the NOLA ep, I felt bad for the guy, but come on! The woman he put in charge of cooking, managing front of house and general manager was way out of her depth if she couldn’t poach an egg. I am sorry she lost her job, but if he wants to succeed, she shouldn’t be involved. The other older ladies waiting tables appeared to be super lazy and attitude trouble too! Just like the dumps shown in Kitchen Nightmares, I cannot imagine ever stepping foot in these places after seeing what goes on in the food prep and storage areas. I don’t believe for a minute that these sad sack owners suddenly see the light and follow all the food safety laws they blatantly and willfully ignored for years.

For all Jerk & Odd's carrying on over her precious Christmas soup,this has to be the most amazing bowl of goodness ever put on a table. It's got to be beyond 'make you wanna slap your mamma' amazing...it must be 'make you wanna fuck for Jesus in a tree house' amazing.

Jerk is just so insufferably smug and petulant for someone with no marketable skills, no resume, no drive or ambition, severely limited verbal & written expressive language skills, very little formal education & near to no personality. Some may put his adult results on Amy & Matt, but Molly was raised in the same house. She appears to be 180-degrees opposite of Mr. Baby Man. Jacob may be a "free spirit" but he had the sense to move away and make his own life like his sister. Even Zach is a better human being than his twin. Jerk's attitude toward his mom is appalling. Zach seems happy with his wife & child and their home. His relationship with Tori looks genuinely happy and they share joyful moments. To get slightly biblical (and I an not religious), Tori is a 'helpmate' and participates in all aspects of their relationship. Odd only looks perpetually offended. Or like she's smelling bad cheese. Jerk & Odd always look so stiff and uncomfortable together when on this show. I don't see much "joy" in their interactions. They definitely enjoy camera time, but I think Instagram is their preferred method of whoredom because they can control the setup. The hair, makeup, wardrobe & backgrounds are carefully chosen to reflect the "AH-may-ZING" hipster doofus, essential oil-blessed lifestyle they have been gifted. Caryn & Matt definitely were sleeping together long before the divorce. Its the only reason why Amy would be so tense about being around her. She has her own steady relationship, so I think if Matt were dating anyone else, Amy would be OK. But having Caryn who was an employee and who slept with the boss in her face all the time must be galling. Did anyone notice when Matt & Caryn were at the nursery to get the mini trees Caryn's Freudian slip? She said "If WE ever sell the farm..." they'd have to figure out a way to take the trees with them! Really, now the farm is a "WE" enterprise?

I can't even get my thoughts gathered around Matt & Amy's property dilemmas. I am just appalled by Jerk & Zach's attitudes. "Yah, we love the farm and want our kids to have it someday..." and the unspoken "but WORK the Farm, uummmm...we'll get back to you on that!" Now that Matt & Amy are divorced and contemplating their own futures (as is their right), Zach & Jerk are in panic mode. Their easy-breezy life style they've grown accustom to could be ending. What is all the BS about J & Z having to study and research and observe how to run the farm & what it takes to do the day-to-day tasks?? You 2 idiots have LIVED THERE almost your entire lives! You don't have any idea of what your Dad and Mom have done for the past twenty-six years??? Those 2 pin heads think moving into the "DW" for a month each will give them the agricultural & business accumen to run a 100-acre farm. Oh, but wait - that genius plan hinges on pushing Amy out of HER home or Matt using community farm proceeds to build himself an LP McMansion first, then Tweedle Dim & Tweedle Dimmer will take turns in the "So You Want to be a Farmer" 30-day Intensive Lab DW. BTW- when Zach mentioned this idea to Tori, she was immediately onboard and game to try it. Odd's response after Jerk brought it up: look of abject horror....<crickets>...<crickets> "Um, I , uh...maybe?". At least Zach brought up what his contributions could be re. Tours, Office Management. What did Jerk claim as his area of expertise? <crickets> Aside from the sell the farm-keep the farm drama, my biggest "Whaaa?" of this episode was Odd & Jerk telling us that Odd hasn't made a "home cooked" meal since April! This episode took place in November I believe. Yes, they moved in and remodled the kitchen (attempt #1), but it was a functioning kitchen for a time before the baby was born, and for a bit after Ember came home. Then Leak Gate happened and remodle #2 happened, so I get that they had no kitchen for that period of time. But when did they move? Late Spring/early Summer? Didn't she have a kitchen in her previous rental home? I am confused how two grown adults haven't managed to cook a meal or 50 between April & November. Always More Stupidity with these two twits. The other thing that irked is how Jerk & Odd congratulated themselves for managing to go on an overnight trip with (gasp!) A BABY...dun dun DUN!!! They both seemed astonished that a) they managed to drive 90min with a car full of baby gear and overnight bags b) they survived taking care of their child for 24 hours while away from their house.

I have worked for giant whiney man babies like Bossy Pants Little Big Man before. They do not change. Good luck with reining in John's Napoleanic complex, Marcus. If Val & Amy are good employees maybe Marcus can give them offeres in one of his other businesses. In addition to the money for the new store, supplies, equipment, etc., I hope Marcus invest a little bit for a subscription to "ABC Mouse.com" for Mike so he can learn to spell. As a woman who's husband thinks getting dressed up means putting on a shirt without a Red Bull/NASCAR/Case/John Deere logo on it, I seldom shop in these kinds of men's "bro-tiques". So, I would never pay $40- $100 for yet another logo or graphic screen print emblazoned tee-shirt. I don't care how great the "quality" is.

My diagnosis - MunchAUJsen Syndrome

Really??? This has to be just to raise her “likes” or followers for her stupid social media pages. How hard is it to ask for info re. baby-friendly foods? Your pediatrician? Your own mom? Your friends/relatives? A local nutritionist? Mommy & Me groups? GOOGLE?? And who is baffled by what to feed her child at this stage in her baby’s life? If your baby rejects a food after several tries, it may be a bit frustrating, but there are so many foods to mash up or purée. And her plea for “easy and simple” is dumb too. Odd has all the time in the world...she is home all day. Once she wakes up, her main “jobs” seem to be: * telling Jerk his honey-do list for the day * jumping online to report to her fans how little sleep she had & post the daily Mastitis Warning Index * saying good morning to the professional photographer they apparently have living on premises * shampooing, conditioning, blow drying, straightening , curling her faux fiery tresses After all those exhausting tasks, she still has at least 6 hours in a day to prepare a bunch of batches of mashed fruits, veggies, yogurt, grains, soups, purées, etc. Pour them in ice trays to freeze or put in portion sized containers in fridge so you have stuff ready to go for a few days.

And then sell the purse. LOL First she will use the bag to raid the housekeeping cart for toiletries, towels, robes, slippers & shower caps. After she squirrels away that stash in her dirty underwear, she will refill the bag by emptying the mini bar & all the various snacks...vegan selections only of course. THEN she will attempt to return the bag.

Right! And aren’t those two hipster doofuses all about being outdoors and communing with Mother Earth? Don’t they dance barefoot around campfires while wearing Carhart work coats and beanies before getting down and dirty in treehouses? Fire up a grill or fire pit and roast some hot dogs or chicken or something! Gah! They are really so helpless. We did a mini remodel in our kitchen, and like others said here...the fridge rolled into the mostly empty dining room. We set up a couple of saw horses with a board to make a table & set up coffee maker, crockpot, microwave and toaster on it. It was kind of inconvenient, but we survived very nicely. That said, I do think their situation is double suck-filled because they don’t have a sink. That is waaaay more inconvenient. But Jerk decreed they would designate the UPstairs bathroom as the interim “kitchen” to wash dishes and bottles. Whhaaaa? if you have a downstairs bath or half bath, why wouldn’t you use that one? Who’s lugging everything up and down? And why? “Always More” back-ass logic from those two I guess.

I like T & Z, and Jackson is one of the cutest babies ever! But the nonsense that comes out of T & Z's mouths about parenting is making it hard to keep liking them sometimes. WTF with the tears over a six month old moving on to solid foods?? Did Tori think she'd have Jackson hanging off her boob until he went to college? And she can still breastfeed if she wants to supplement or keep the whole bonding thing going, right? Some moms nurse their kids until they're in pre-K (which I think is weird). She could use her breastmilk to mix in the cereal too. As for hand wringing over not knowing what Jackson will be eating...again, WTF? Organic, all natural foods exist. You know what also exists? FOOD LABELS! Read a label or 20 to educate yourself on which brands have additives or artificial ingredients. And then the 2 of them acting astonished that Jackson figured out "so quickly" how to open his mouth to eat! He must be a baby genius!! T & Z don't understand that suckling & eating, much like breathing air & flinching when startled, are primative, innate abilities all humans have? Or do they think other babies stay up late to watch YouTube videos to learn how to eat mush off a spoon? Well, the old adage of "be careful what you wish for" came back to bite me in the ass. I have been begging not to hear Odd's constant refrain of "mastitis" in every episode. So, this week's episode removed all mention of Odd's current boob status (my guess- still wrapped in cabbage leaves), but replaced it with "Arizona! Caryn! Caryn in Arizona! Me & Caryn love Arizona! Caryn may invest in property in Arizona! Snowbirding in Arizona! Love the heat, good for my bones....in Arizona!!" Now I have to get down on my knees and pray there is never any episode showing a post natal, nursing Odd visiting Matt's retirement home..."Mastitis is Mesa!" or "Achey in AZ!" would just about kill me. Jerk really showed his colors to Matt. Too bad Matt can't see that Jerk is not interested in letting Matt retire or move on to a new career because neither of those plans are inconvenient <<for Jerk>> at this juncture. That kid truly expects to go on "blogging" and spewing hipster wisdom over the internet with his wife AND being the owner of Roloff Farm. He's had 25+ years of living with his physically disabled father. He has seen the pain and difficulties Matt has lived with, yet doesn't seem to have offered more than "Hey, it's pumpkin season!" awareness to what it takes to own and run a working farm. Amy, Jerk, Zach & Matt are true fools is there hasn't been any real talk about the future. None of these people ever sat down to plan (beyond assuming) what would happen to the Farm in the event of either parent's retirement, dibilitating injury, death, or divorce & re-marriage? Especially after the divorce, there should have been financial & estate planning done with the help of professionals. All the adult kids should have been included in conversations about what they each want to do and what M & A want. I have to believe that these things actually have been discussed IRL, & all this "what will happen???" drama is drummed up for a "story". If not, the entire Roloff clan is dumber than portrayed onTV.

Um, for which “college” did Ms. Opse “teach”? She may not have used the typical egregious JJ grammar errors, but she seemed very loopy and not too bright. Was she high or drunk? She says she is on medical leave, but I think that’s code for her employer forcing her to go to rehab as a condition of probation or rehire. I also think there was some other type of “repayment” in play between the def and the litigant.

Maybe these two nimrods will improve with age, but the constant whining about how tired they are and how important it is that they “find time” to still be a couple is so pathetic. I am almost twice Odd’s age. I worked all through high school and college. I got a good job right after graduation, and after earning a couple of promotions, the company paid for me to get my MBA....while working full time. Over the years while being steadily employed, I managed to have a social life, buy a house, get married, and adopted a newborn. Since becoming a wife/mother/home owner, I cook, clean, shop, garden, do home repairs, did drop off and pick up at daycare, manage all the doctor and dentist and orthodontist appointments, volunteer as a Girl Scout leader, serve as the treasurer for the PTO, drive my child and her friends to various lessons and sports events, host Sunday dinners, holidays, b-day parties and sleepovers, plan and pack for our one week vacation, have standing monthly “date nights” with my husband. Am I tired? Fuck yes, I am! But I also know: 1) what I do day in and day out is nothing special...most of the women I know do all this shit and more 2) I am fortunate to have everything I do. Others who work just as hard or harder may not be as fortunate, and I try my best to remember that when I start bitching about my lack of sleep or a bad day at work. Odd and her jerk wad husband have no idea what the real world is like for the majority of working moms and dads out there. I wish she would remove the 5lbs of eye makeup and the multiple pairs of false lashes so she could really see how differently she livesand put it all into perspective. Audrey Roloff is not a new age hipster hero for “suffering” through natural childbirth or breastfeeding or mastitis or missing out on 10 hours of sleep. That, my dear, dumb, entitled twit is just called “being a mom”.

re. the "party" for the pumpkin people....that was a lame ass party. Pizza and a few 2-liter bottles of soda??? "Um, gee thanks for your lack luster enthusiasm and gratitude for all the labor WE provided, while your two sons whined about their complex & difficult lives all season. With all that business of Z & J being pregnant, laboring , delivering, nursing & parenting ONE child each and no other job to go to, we totally understand why they can't pitch in. We are forever in YOUR debt for providing us with a slice & warm Sprite! Can't wait to come back next year! And maybe one of us can pony up some funds for ice!" Loved Amy's disdainful, "who's gonna clean all this up?" at the end of Lame Fest 2017. Really??? First of all, YOU and your dolt ex are the figureheads & proprietors of the so-called party, so grab a trash bag and get your ass in gear. Second, your able-bodied jack ass heir apparent is loafing standing right next you, so hand him a trash bag on your way by. Finally... what's to "clean up"? She said it as if as if they just hosted Coachella or Burning Man on the property. A few pizza boxes, some cups and plates rounded up into trash/recycling bins, and re-stack the 15 chairs you so charitably offered your hard working guests. DONE!

Can someone explain to me how Odd is so fucking tired all the fucking time? She does not work any kind of part time or full time job. She doesn’t appear to do volunteer work. It doesn’t even look like she leaves the damn house often. She has Jerk running up and down stairs fetching oils and cabbage leaves (WT ever lovin’ F was that about?). I do not count her sitting in front of a computer to “write” a “blog” that is woefully full of spelling and grammatical errors as employment. I never breastfed, but I know many women who do/did. Most have other children to care for as well as a nursing baby. Some have a spouse who also works. A few are single. ALL OF THEM WORK! I know nursing is time consuming and can be difficult, but 99% of the women who choose to do it manage to do it while juggling family, career and social lives. How is it possible that millions of years of this planet’s existence have seen civilizations rise & cultures develop if breastfeeding was as hard and exhausting and draining and painful as one Mrs. Jerk-ermy Roloff keeps telling anyone who will listen? Good God, she is so self absorbed! So entitled for someone who hasn’t really put any effort into making the world a better place. Her idiot husband is just as insufferable. Never mind his ridiculous BS how he wants to inherit the Farm despite hardly doing anything close to manual labor (no, driving a ‘Gator’ or ‘mule’ or tractor around on camera doesn’t count). His judgmental attitude toward his mother is obnoxious. I wanted to reach through the screen and slap his stupid face when he made his comment about seeing Matt, Caryn, Chris and Amy together in the barn. “It’s a broken picture” “It isn’t want anybody wants” Guess what, jackass? It is exactly what your dumb-ass Daddy wanted. He slept with the help and allegedly screwed around prior to Caryn while married to your mother. He was selfish and immature and absent during their marriage, and has the emotional intelligence of a 4 year old. He is the one who asked for the divorce. Hey Matt...If that pirate ship has so many financial hopes and dreams attached to it, why the hell wasn’t it ready to go for your precious pumpkin season? Or at least by the 2nd or 3rd week of it? Why didn’t your celebrity friend know he was supposed to be in pirate costume? My guess is because you have no follow through. He likes to be the “idea man”, but without having vision, drive or commitment to see them through, he just ends up with barns and sheds and rooms full of hoarded crap and half finished projects.

How can you say this??? What about the giant orange dinosaur? Hilltop Steakhouse’s pen of “cattle” on their front lawn and the 30 foot tall cactus? A glazed donut from Kane’s is worth the trip to Saugus for cripes sake! (I grew up in Melrose...hi!)

I never want to hear the word “cuddle” ever again. It never ceases to amaze me how many men have so much money to spend on porn and escorts. I don’t know the going rate for a decent (enough) looking prostitute, but Miss Alaska is not Julia Roberts-level attractive. She isn’t exactly Pretty Woman yet she claims to pull in $10 grand for whatever service she provides?? Even if she were the best lay anyone ever had since the dawn of time, $10,000 seems excessive for sex.

EXACTLY! And if Jerk & Zach's excuse for not holding down real jobs is the show -i.e.- production constraints like getting consent to film at a company or schedule conflicts, then somewhere these 2 should make it known in their various social media outlets. Otherwise, they are making themselves look like bigger short-sighted idiots than the show already portrays them. TLC has provided a nice gig, but it ain't gonna last forever. I don't know if even a spin-off with just Z/T & J/A would pull in enough viewers to make it viable for another couple of years. What if Matt's threats of an early death come to fruition? What if he has to sell the farm? Even if he & Amy decide to will/sell the place to any of their kids, Molly & Jacob aren't coming back to take it over IMO. Zach is not physically able to do much of the manual labor, and I honestly don't think he wants to make that his life. Zach is (? was?) employed at the soccer facility, and Tori has a teaching degree, so maybe they can jump back into the job market when LPBW folds up. I don't think Jerk has any concept of the actual manual and mental labor involved in running that place. I think he thinks he will get to ride around in the golf cart and be the Master of All He Surveys. Apparently Odd never really worked for any long term employer, neither has Jerk. I don't see either of them as financial geniuses and making wise investment decisions with whatever TLC money they earn. I'm not including their Biblical advice column or snake oil "business" as future income sources b/c those markets are pretty narrow. As for acting as if being "dads" is their full time jobs. OK, great if that's what you & your partner decide. However, in the real world where the rest of us non-TV people live, that choice is usually only an option when one of the partners has a job to cover the expenses of the home in which the other partner will "stay". Saying you are the SAHD when your WIFE IS ALSO staying at home kinda cancels out your claim.

I hope for the safety of everyone watching that no one was playing a drinking game any time someone said "pumpkin" or "pirate ship" My God, enough about the damn pirate ship. He bought that thing months ago and talked about how he wanted it for the grandkids to play on like his kids did on the old one. I didn't know he meant it to be a money-making venture as well. An d if that was the plan all along, then why the Hell wasn't someone working on it during the summer? Jerk & Zach have some excuses for not being able to help due to babies, moving, etc. But there are other people that work on the farm, no? Or hire a crew back in July or August to have the damn thing prepped and ready. And all Matt's boo-hooing that it wasn't ready in time is stupid. Yes, it wasn't ready for opening day, but if he hustled, it could be done for the following weekend. Pumpkin season lasts for a few weeks right? It isn't just one weekend. I wonder what he plans to charge for people to get on the ship? I know around my neck of the woods there are farms that monetize everything during apple/pumpkin picking season. There's one farm we stopped going to because they started charging separate fees for every activity added over the years. When we started going there, they only charged for the apple bags or pumpkins by weight. The last time we went you paid an admission fee of $10, then the usual fee per apple/pumpkin picking you did.. They charge $2 per person if you want to ride the hay wagon out into the orchard or pumpkin patch vs. walking. If your kids wanted a pony ride- $5. Visit the petting zoo- $5. Feed the swans in the pond (who were very mean BTW) - $3/cup. Pet the Angora bunnies - $3. Face painting -$10-20. Run across the hay bales - $5. Go through the corn maze -$5/adult $3/kid. Take a picture on the tractor - $3/ person in photo! They also sold food/snacks that was way over priced - $8 for roasted corn cob and I think $11 for a burger!

Okay, I live in Massachusetts where both the idiot ‘responsible’ dog owner and the shady Six Flags cuz reside. Not much to say about the dog case because JJ was right. It is her fault for letting her dog stray so far away when she knew other dogs were also allowed to roam off leash. She took the risk. Wingaersheek Beach is lovely, but there are a lot of entitled pain in the asses there...we used to call them ‘Thurston & Loveys’ when we went. As for Six Flags case...never been to any of their parks. The one here in Mass has a bad rep for a lot of gang related problems such as stabbing, fights, arrests. Anyway, I too was curious about the defendant’s description of the season passes and the too good to be true meal passes. If I heard correctly, she said the $140 season pass included unlimited park entry and “3 meals a day” for every day you enter the park. Multiplied by 4 = $560. I looked up prices, and things must have changed drastically between her 2017 rates and current 2018. A basic season pass (for park entry only) is regularly $190 for unlimited days during the season.. The basic meal plan is separate, and also regularly $190. It includes lunch, dinner & a snack ea visit to the park. In my old school math, that comes to $380 pp! Times FOUR!!! That’s $1520! I know any case involving accurate calculation of who owes what on this show is as rare as finding a unicorn, but that is a big discrepancy.

I liked this ep the best so far, but that’s not full on praise for a very boring season. The story obviously is not good enough to keep me interested since my mind wanders and I find time to focus on things the (lazy) writers don’t think about. My biggest peeve (this week) was the Doctor’s big shady shake down plan for his newest recruits. “Get the ring back from the Toby jug collector!” Um, if that jug was going up for sale at an estate auction, here are a few real world facts the writers missed...1) typically the auctioneer/bank/note holder will clear the house of any antiques or pieces of value to keep themselves or sell at a better auction to get more money. At the very least, if they suspect an item has value, they would have an appraisal done so it can fetch a better price. 2) even if no one thought it was worth any money, as soon as the auction person moved it, s/he would hear the ring clanging inside. Or a potential buyer would man handle and inspect it for chips, makers marks etc. Once they peered inside or tipped it over, Ta-dah! ring falls out. My grandmother collected Toby jugs. Even the largest of them are not so cavernous that ahonking huge diamond ring would be missed. There are no secret trap doors in them either. What makes the Doctor (or anyone with an ounce of sense) think the ring is still snuggled safe and sound inside the jug? Even if He knows all that & is using this caper as a ruse, wouldn’t Maddie or Jules or Richard or Ezra ask the same question?

I watched Laverne Cox first because I am a big fan of her character on Orange is the New Black. I think she is great and I applaud all her openness about her trans experience. Her mom was adorable too! Any time this show (or Finding Your Roots) covers a guest's ancestors' slavery I get very emotional. I'm glad Ms. Cox found her politically active & former slave GGGF. I also liked that the family story she investigated all took place in her home state. It meant the episode could spend more time on her story vs. watching a travelogue of the guest flying or driving from place to place. On a very shallow note, I found her vocal fry and up-speak super annoying. In a few segments, she sounded very "on" and as if she were doing a dramatic reading versus just having a conversation with the genealogists.

Me too... so happy my doorbell rang after the 487th “I’m a Mamma Bear, OK?” statement. I missed the majority of this useless episode. The entire clan involved looked like they are missing several chromosomes. I would guess the cumulative IQ of Mamma Bear, her 2 full grown “cubs” and the interloper is hovering around 98. All 3 of the women must have taken the talk show prep course for attention seeking asshats “Speaking Louder Than Everyone Else in the Room Makes You More Righter!” What was with the sister’s incessant fake crying and whining about her miscarriage....the one she “didn’t want to talk about publicly”?? Um, maybe stop bringing it up in between each for your mother’s “I’m a Mamma Bear!!” exclamation if it’s so painful to discuss...in front of strangers...on a national TV show. Since I missed the second half, can someone let me know if Dr. Phill offered that horse-faced sister any dental help? That was a lot of teeth and/or jaw bone fighting for not enough facial real estate.

Was today’s theme “Parents Who Don’t Get It?” The first couple suing their 25 yo college graduate, employed daughter for her “share” of the rent looked like total grifters. Trying to teach her to be responsible was their reasoning...huh? That responsible young lady did well enough in school to be accepted to college. Then she either earned scholarships &/or worked to put herself through school. She graduated & managed to find work vs. sitting at home on the couch. Instead of being proud about her accomplishments, they were looking to her to supplement their income. I hope the 15 yo at home has begun drafting her escape plan after watching this episode. Then we get mother and son duo who look like they are auditioning for “Sid and Nancy; The AARP Years”. Mommy thinks the mean old slum lord is in the wrong because there is no way any of the multiple police calls or hazmat suit inducing damage clean up is her Sonny Boy’s fault! Did I hear the 43 yo son trying to tell JJ that the cops were there so often because he worked for them? So now he’s auditioning for Donnie Brasco! He’s really an undercover cop, you guys! I totally believe him. You just have to look into his eyes...if you can see past those drug-addled Manson lamps.

When I saw the “coming up...” segment of Ramona, Lu and Sonja all suited up in the coveralls, I assumed Sonja wrangled the ladies into cleaning the dog shit off the patio. Or they were helping her locate more cell phones in toilets. Or washing her 40 yr old lingerie in the bidet. Or just having afternoon tea on her bodily fluid stained sofa. Actually, it’s probably in the best interest of anyone entering Gray Gardens to don a hazmat suit. Add the booties and filter mask for extra precautions. And carry one of those blue light wands before touching any surface.

The tower things confused me...the bakers used styrofoam cones as supports. They “glued” the macarons and cream puffs on it with caramel or sugar. Is using a form traditional? I made a croque en bouche in high school, and we just piled up the puffs with caramel glue, no form. Plus, wouldn’t sticking all the pastries on styrofoam render them inedible? How do you peel one off without leaving half of it on the cone? Or pull off some styrofoam with it? Hardened caramel or sugar is pretty strong! I don’t like champagne as a flavor. By the glass? Mais oui! Maybe I just haven’t had really well baked pastries made with it. I tried some kind of champagne mousse thing at a New Year’s party once, and meh.