sugarplum

I’ll attempt to answer this. Let me preface by saying - I’ve never seen or met The Rodrigues family. I did, however, grow up fundie, in a fundie family, and attending an IFB church until I graduated college. So, I have some experience. Basically, the Rods are serving as missionaries - their “field” just isn’t international. they print these tracts and other literature, then disperse them to other missionaries and churches to hand out. I haven’t been to their website or done a lot of research on the family, but they most likely have a home/backing church, and are tied to a mission organization since the quoted above says they are traveling on deputation (which is basically traveling to “sister” churches to raise funds for their ministry, introduce their family to supporting churches, and solicit prayers). When I was growing up, our church was involved with the BIMI organization. My pastor was on the board or directors and we frequently had missionaries/families at our church that would preach, sing, some even provided skits. They always set up a table in the vestibule filled with photos of them in their field, educational materials, prayer cards, and a way to sign up for their mailing/prayer list. A “love offering” was always collected for them (that was in addition to the regular church offering). My church supported missionaries regularly. A portion of the weekly offering went directly to missions. I don’t remember the exact break down because it’s been quite a few years since I attended, but close to 50% of tithes were devoted to missions. The remaining was used for church expenses. The church prided itself on financially supporting missions. So, while the Rod family is taking printing jobs, they truly may not be getting paid directly for each job. Their supporting churches pay them at certain intervals (weekly/monthly/quarterly) and that money is used for their ministry. Basically all of their supporting churches are funding the printing, even though they may not be placing orders. It’s all done for the “greater good”. It’s viewed as outreach and even if my church may not be in need of their tracts at the time, another church would be, and both churches had the same mission - win souls for Christ. The only way to get support from churches, is for the churches to get to know your ministry. So they travel around the country, getting their name and mission in front of people to garner more support. While I’m still a believer, I haven’t been fundie for a long time and no longer attend an IFB church. But much of my family still attend, so I feel as though I still have some ties. I have an aunt and uncle who frequently welcome visiting missionaries into their home, treat them to nice dinners out, and constantly send supplies when they are in the field. When I was a senior in high school, I went on a mission trip with my church and we spent much of the trip folding tracts like the Rods print and going door to door in a foreign country, passing them out. As an adult and mother now, I shudder at the fact that my parents allowed me to do this. It was a different age then, and we had a greater sense of being safe, but I would never allow my kids to knock on strangers doors now and hand out ANYTHING, including bible literature. But I guess at the time, it was just assumed by the church (including my parents), that God would protect us. And thankfully, the worse thing that ever happened to us was people pretending to not speak English, people slamming the door in our face, or cussing us out. 😉 I hope that explains it some. As I said, I’m no longer a part of this lifestyle and haven’t been for years, but I spent the better part of 25 years as a fundie and am happy to answer questions as best as I can from my experience.

I agree. Carlin didn’t seem to mind, and I think Kelly looked beautiful. I’m a photographer and see this more now than you used to for sure. Some traditions seem to be loosely followed or not followed at all these days. Over the summer, I shot a wedding where the bridesmaids were dressed in a pale beige, similar in color to Kelly’s dress. It was beautiful. The bride stood out still...no one questioned who was the bride. Haha! And no one was overshadowing her or stealing her thunder. That being said, I fully expect Jill to upstage Nuri in any way she can!

She isn’t. But she’s still in a lot of the promos for Radio City.

I though the same thing.

Wait, is that home security camera footage on the TV in the background? That’s just creepy and takes lack of privacy to a whole new level. We have a home security system...with a camera in our baby’s room (in place of a Baby monitor), one pointed at the pool, one in our detached garage, and one at our front door. It has NEVER been streaming on our tv. When our daughter is asleep, we will play her feed on the Echo Show, otherwise, the feeds aren’t even looked at unless we get an alarm. How completely creepy.

Does anyone know if Jacie will be performing with the Rockettes this year? We will be going to the show in December again. Saw her last year, and would love to see her again if she’s performing and her cast is on the day we have tickets. It’s so fun to watch when someone you recognize is in it. A girl from my hometown is performing this year, can’t wait to see her either.

Then I misunderstood. I read the original most as gender wasn’t determined until 6-8 weeks, which isn’t the case. I don’t believe Lauren had the tissue tested and even said I didn’t think she knew the gender. I was simply stating that gender is determined long before 6-8 weeks. While I absolutely don’t think Lauren had the tissue tested or knew the gender for certain, it is possible that she COULD have.

My husband and I are going through IVF. We have frozen embryos, and because of genetic testing, we know the gender of each. They definitely aren’t 6-8 week old fetuses! I don’t think Lauren KNEW the gender, just stating that gender is definitely determined very, very early on!

I think it’s just a bad shot, because honestly, Tess does too...and she’s anything but chubby!

I realize that it was a pastor speaking, but honestly, what he said was not religious, just uplifting and motivational. I didn’t hear any specific religious undertones at all. I’m sure he could have done that off camera, but what was shown wasn’t exactly “religious”.

I completely agree. I went through the motions and nothing more for over a year after my sister passed away unexpectedly (at 31, leaving behind my 4 year old niece). Some days even now, I feel like that’s all I’m doing and it’s been 3 years. I didn’t function. But I can appreciate a welcome distraction and throwing yourself at something to keep from drowning in your grief. My heart goes out to Shaina.

I did not care for Victoria last season, but I guess I’m in the minority this season because I think she’s shown big improvements. In the stadium tour, I did a double take at first because I didn’t realize it was her. She looked amazing. Is she perfect? No, but none of the girls are. I give her kudos for taking the negative that was last year and turning it around this year. Did she have the staff on her side, sure, but no one can take away the work that she herself has put in. Her body alone is a huge transformation. ordinarily, I would have no problem with Kelli bringing in her pastor or any other motivational speaker at this point in camp to encourage the ladies, but with circumstances as they were, I felt it was inappropriate. Watching it play out, I was putting myself in Shainas shoes. I’ve lost someone very near and dear to me and I’m not the same person I was before. Had I been shaina, I would have mixed feelings of guilt (feeling as though this was done just for me), feelings of shame (as though I wasn’t grieving the way the thought I should, and grief is so very personal), and feelings of being slightly exploited. In the beginning, she looked uncomfortable to me. I know if it were me, I would be doing every thing I could to stay focused on the task at hand, knowing my grief was consuming me. I would be showing up to practice, dancing, and welcoming the brief distraction from my emotions and thoughts. Having someone come in and speak, partly because of my personal tragedy would take my emotions right back to the dark side. I don’t think I would have been able to focus on practice following that. I’m glad she had her coach and team support, but I think Kelli’s attempt to help was a bit misguided and very unhelpful. I get the feeling Lily would be a better dancer once the pressure was off. After last season nd her cut, I would be stressed dancing too. im not sure why “1 good dance in her bag of tricks” was ok for Meredith and Christina, but Lily was told it wouldn’t be enough. Lily has been far more consistent than Meredith...why wasn’t she given the same feedback. Ive never been a Christina fan. She was desperate and full of excuses every year she tried out. And the fake tears/trying to make herself cry was an immediate turn off for me. She earned a little bit more of my respect this week by the way she carried herself. I saw a lot more maturity. She’s still my least favorite though. Lol

I think it’s just a reflection (perhaps from a flash?) on the photo.

Happy for Jackie! Does anyone know if she will still be dancing with the Rockettes this year?

I thought it was confirmed that there were no alternates? Besides, if they have alternates, why do all stars fill in when someone is out? Sorry, that’s speculation I don’t buy. I think Lily spent all of last summer with the team in training camp and they formed actual friendships that didn’t end just because training camp did. Not everything is a conspiracy. 🤷‍♀️

She may have, I don't follow other teams. But even if she did, her dancing is sub-par, at best. Just because you can do something, doesn't mean you do it well. 😉 I don't think her or Malena either one should have made it to finals. 🤷‍♀️

Oh, I agree about Malena. I don’t think she should have gone to finals either. But I also don’t think Madi should. Without a LOT of technique classes, she’s just not trained enough to get there. If I’m remembering correctly, didn’t she start dance really late? She remembered the choreography, but she didn’t execute it well, IMO. She stood out in a really bad way to me. There is no way she could dance next to the veterans.

The difference is that Madi really isn’t a very good/strong dancer. Kelli never caught their attention, but she was a rockstar with solid technique. Madi is definitely not.

Everyone likes different girls! And that’s great! I wasn’t a fan of Kalyssas from day 1, but it was mostly because I think she lacked technique. I’m rooting for Kat. I just couldn’t get past the comparison of them tonight, but I’m very open minded with her!

I think the choice is in HOW they share, which will differ wildly from person to person, famous or not. Because they are in the public eye, I think it would be awfully hard to not acknowledge the loss in some way when it will be obvious she is no longer pregnant. That being said, for anyone that posts even semi-regularly and has acknowledged a pregnancy on social media, I think the same would be true. If you have announced you were pregnant, had an obvious bump, and suddenly no longer do, you can choose to not say anything, but by doing so, you are allowing others to speculate what went wrong. For some, that’s ok. They don’t mind. For others, they want to control the narrative. They want the truth out before rumors start or questions are asked. I don’t think this is exclusive to public figures or celebrities. It’s true of anyone with a semi active social media presence. Exactly.

I’m in the minority here and don’t see their posting on SM being a millennial thing, or just because they are on TV. I’ve had 3 close friends who have gone through something very similar. One was pregnant with twins and lost them both at 23 weeks. She delivered them both, a day apart from each other. She immediately took pictures and posted them online. She had been very open about her pregnancy and bedrest, and it was the easiest way to let everyone that knew her know she had lost them. This occurred 3 years ago, and she still celebrates her boys and shares their pictures on social media. Another friend had a singleton 2 years ago and lost him in the 22-24 week range as well. She, too, immediately posted his picture and celebrates him just the way she does her living daughter. Friend 1 was 34. Friend 2 was 25. Last spring, a very dear friend of mine went for her anatomy scan and found out their second child was a sweet baby boy. They also found out that he had multiple conditions that were in no way compatible with life. She is relatively well known and shares much of her life with her followers - though what she shares is filtered. She controls the information. After the ultrasound, she came home and grieved for a few days of what was to come and what will not be. She shared it with those of us closest to her. Several days later, she took immediately to social media to let everyone know what was going on. She did not share all of the details, but shared enough that her followers knew it was serious and grim. She chose to carry her son as long as the Lord allowed her. He was only expected to live a few days longer. She ended up carrying him until 30 weeks, when she started having signs of labor. She delivered a beautiful baby boy, who cried as he was born. He died shortly after in their arms. She had complications after birth and spent several extra days in the hospital. But once home for a few days, she again, shared the story of his birth, his short life, and his death. She shared from 20 weeks on her experience. She shared his story. She shared their feelings. Her reasoning - this was a child that they loved and prayed for. A child they wanted. They shared their first child, there was no way they were going to hide their second child away and not share and celebrate his life as well, no matter how short it was. Their first picture shared was of his sweet little hand. Nothing else, just his hand and theirs. A few weeks later, they shared a picture of him, but with his face turned away from the camera (he was very swollen and had some mild obvious deformities). A few weeks later, they shared his face, knowing that people were curious, and again, wanting to share and celebrate his life as much as a healthy child. She has shared many times about their walk, and how she didn’t know how to comfort one in her shoes before all of this. She has explained what she needed, how she felt, how she endured in the hopes that it would not only help another mother walking that road, but that it would help anyone who KNEW someone facing those hard days. She has since gone on to have another healthy son, almost a year to the date she lost her middle child. Her youngest is celebrated the same way the first 2 were. For reference sake, she is 35. Ive experienced multiple miscarriages, all between 7-12 weeks. Losing a pregnancy, even that early, is devastating, but I can’t ever compare my grief to my friends who lost babies that they held in their arms. I’ve also learned that everyone grieves differently. I was 6 months pregnant when I lost my 32 year old sister very unexpectedly. My sister was my best friend. Grief changes us, whether we want it to or not. Sometimes we find comfort in talking as much as we can about the one we have lost, sharing pictures, videos, etc. Other times, we find comfort in secluding ourselves away, hiding from the world. Neither is right or wrong...we do what we have to do to survive these times. I hate seeing judgement on these kids (sorry, that’s what they are to me) just because of the way they are grieving. MANY people who have a stillbirth, or lose a baby shortly after birth have photos taken. I’m a professional photographer and for a while, I took pictures for Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep. It was a gut wrenching and beautiful job all at the same time. There was not a family that I photographed for that I didn’t cry right along with them. I hugged them and sobbed with them, while capturing every single thing that I could for them, knowing those pictures would be the only thing they had to “see” of their child in the hours, days, weeks, months, years to come. I would often get in my car to go home and be unable to drive for the tears. Joy isn’t the first person to have her hair and makeup done for photos after birth. I’ve had friends who have had normal births, and immediately after, called in a professional hair and make up artist to fix them up so that it looks as if they had an effortless birth, and are perfect for photos of their new family. I’d imagine it made Joy feel good after such heartache to be fluffed and puffed and made beautiful...even though I’m sure she was dying inside. That may not be true for everyone. After I gave birth to my daughter, I really didn’t care what I looked like. I was just overjoyed to finally have a living child in my arms. But I totally understand the “normalcy” of wanting to be made up, especially for pictures. I can not and will not fault Joy for that. Carlin gets on my nerves, but she deserves credit here. She did a beautiful thing by being there for her friend. She dropped everything and was THERE. That alone is a good friend to me. She did what she could - when she likely felt helpless in the situation - she did something that she could actually do (and is very good at)...she made Joy beautiful for her pictures; pictures that Joy will cling to and look back on for many years to come. I see no problem with the images that were shared. They were tasteful and not at all inappropriate. Joy and Austin shared on THEIR timeline - apparently a week after they lost Annabell. They controlled that narrative. And as far as the rest of the family continuing to post on social media even after they knew this had happened to their sister, I have a different perspective. It has already been mentioned that if they stopped posting on SM for a week, people would question why. They obviously wanted no attention drawn that would make people question what was going on. On top of that, I would be surprised if they do not always use an Instagram scheduler to post. You can load images a month or longer in advance, schedule the date that they will post, enter the caption, and some schedulers will even auto post for you...meaning, you never have to open Instagram and yet, your feed and stories are full. Considering the fact that the Duggar’s often post images that aren’t necessarily in real time, but weeks or longer after the picture was taken, I have felt for a while that they have used Planoly, Later, or one of the other schedulers out there. And I have no problem with it. I use it myself for my business. It keeps me posting frequently without having to devote time to the SM game every day. IF this is what many family members do, then it makes perfect sense why it appears as though the family members continued on with life as normal (multiple photos of Felicity, etc) while Joy and Austin were experiencing the worse days of their life. I choose to give them grace through this. I’m not a Duggar fan by any means, but I don’t think their cult has any bearing on this. They are young adults who are in uncharted territory in their own life and they are doing what it takes to survive. And here’s the thing with grief...what works today for you, may not be what you need tomorrow. You take each day as it comes and you adjust the sails as necessary to keep yourself above water. If Joy and Austin find comfort I sharing their daughter, I applaud them for it. If they find comfort in hiding away from the world, continue hiding without question. Grieve, by whatever means necessary.

But the thing is, unless someone is directly involved in the situation, everything is second hand information. And with second and third hand information, every time the story is told, it is changed slightly (or significantly)...just like playing the telephone game. So, there is a good chance that what is being shared is completely embellished with only hints of truth. And there is NO way for you to know otherwise unless you were physically present and witnessed it. And it’s being spread as truth. And yes, it could definitely bring on legal ramifications if it gets back to someone, whether it’s the truth or not. It’s easy to forget (or ignore) that these are real people, in real jobs...not just figured on tv.

Me too. I hate the whole “I won’t tell the class, but pm me if you want the tea” crap, but now I gotta know. Will one of you with the info pass it on or just post it for everyone? Lol

I totally agree. Brennan has always been one of my favorites (even the years she didn’t make it), and it is solely because of the way she presents herself. She is one of the few that I follow on Instagram. She always seems happy, and genuine. She seems mature and sweet. She could be the polar opposite of those things in real life (I wouldn’t believe it, haha), but everything she has shown has been positive. I may be in the minority, but I love her look. She seems like one who is just happy to be on the team. If she never makes how group, group leader, or point, she seems as though just being on the team is enough. And I respect that a lot. I hope for great things for her.

Christina - I don’t think she should have ever made it in the first place. savannah - I just don’t see what others see in her. I don’t think she’s attractive and she’s a mediocre dancer at best. Another one that should never have made it. Amber - I’m sure she’s great, but she just doesn’t do anything for me.