BubblingKettle

Today, JJ shared that her brother gave her a heart defibrillator as a gift. Maybe that's a high-end gift among the elderly set? I'm trying to imagine what her reaction may have been upon tearing off the wrapping paper and seeing that it wasn't a Waterford candy dish, a Lalique vase, some Moet & Chandon....it was a heart defibrillator.

I couldn't help but be entertained by a member of the audience during the Jinky case. His dapper style initially caught my eye. As the case proceeded, I noticed that his face was so expressive and hilarious. I hope he becomes a regular.

I loved Jordan's verbal smackdown of Alexis. She touched on so many valid points -- codependence; her lack of intelligence, strength, confidence, pride, and self-respect; setting a bad example for her daughters. Preach it, Jordan! I'm tired of the broken, brainless Alexis. And if they have to turn Brad back into a baddie, I wish they could have, at least, made him a stealthy and quiet one. Tampering with Finn's drug test results was a step in the right (sneaky villain) direction, but his shrieking in the hallway just makes him completely unlikeable. I enjoyed Brad back when he and Lucas were on together. But we all know that these writers are busy with their Carly-whore/Sonny-macho sex god double standard, the dumbing down of Alexis, Lulu's baby rabies, Chimera and Scarecrow, and so on --- they can't be bothered with something modern and relevant like characters who are in a same-sex partnership/marriage, people in happy relationships, friendships. The UK soaps do all that with finesse. Chad Duell has a 14-year-old's face. I can't believe he's going to be 30, as someone noted in an earlier post.

And she was bothered when his tooth was missing? A missing tooth doesn't rank high on the list of things wrong with his appearance. Of course my curiosity got the best of me, and I turned to google. Matthew is/was a member of the "Northside Cutthroat Bulldog Gang." With a name like that, brevity is obviously not one of their weapons.

On today's rerun, Sparkle's boyfriend was like a cross between a Jordan Peele character and Tim Meadows' The Ladies Man. However, the defendant's kind of comedy was completely unintentional. And Sparkle....well, she was Sparkle.

Congestive heart failure, a shoulder injury, a back injury, a botched back surgery, and a surgery to fix the botched surgery..... She probably had the baby. That would give her a new collection of excuses for not working.

It looked like she had prognathism (no chin) and some structural issues with her mouth. I was so distracted by those side teeth. I initially wondered if she had top teeth, but they were probably in there somewhere. Doctors/orthodontists could fix that. I'm watching one of today's rerun cases....was "he begged me to date him" really that 40-something-year-old fool's excuse for getting knocked up by a teen? What a disgusting pervert. I think she was really angry that her crocodile tears didn't earn her sympathy from JJ. I hope her sons (who are in the age range of her dream man) put a good amount of distance between themselves and their mother. No one needs to be around someone that stupid and manipulative.

Lol -- that would be quite the marketing strategy. Maybe it was The Maximus Box? Maximus might sound a little like Fat Asses when you have an infected ear. That's one of those shopping services for big & tall men.

Animals and elderlies are my top two cry-starters. This Volkswagon commercial focuses on grandparents, and it decimated me in the first 15 seconds.

In the latest Walgreens commercial, Tina Fey says, "you'll be amazed what happens." Shouldn't it be "you'll be amazed by what happens" or "you'll be amazed at what happens"?

In one of today's reruns, a mother accused her former daycare provider of taking a nap after she left her daughter on the couch with a tablet. JJ asked the litigants, "What's a tablet?" The defendant said, "Like an iPad." Judy exhaled with relief and said, "Oh. I thought they were talking about pills." Yikes.

Blue/Keerah was one manipulative individual. And sadly, Yasmine was (is) easy prey. I kind of didn't understand why Yasmine was so devastated and crying after the reveal, because during talk time with Grandmom, it seemed that Yasmine knew that she had been completely catfished. Plus, when the group was in the laundry room/garage (?) looking at Blue's Twitter account, Yasmine said "I saw that it was already following me" --- so, she made a point of not calling Blue a 'he' or a 'she.' So, at that point, I realized that she already knew that the catfish's gender was part of the deceit.

Poor Marvin. I wanted to give that young man a hug several times as the story was unfolding. I mean, I know he should have known better about the "modeling," but the guy was naive and infatuated by the attention he was getting. The three perpetrators were total dicks, and I was so annoyed by their defense of playing Deputies Dog of Grindr. Granted, top models aren't going to call Joplin their home, but "People like that don't live here"?? Well, who is to say there aren't attractive young men with friends who do photography as a hobby in Joplin? Way to be rude to your locale and the people in it, you three screw-ups. And I'm sure those three are still actively catfishing people, using the excuse of "catching cheaters."

I just heard the plaintiff start her case by saying, "I had fox dreadlocks put in. Fake dreadlocks." So, I said to the TV, "Fox dreadlocks? What, fake fur?....Oh god, she means FAUX."

The mentions of The Outback are reminding me of Uncle Mac's now-forgotten Aussie accent.

Blame Gary.

With so much discussion of Gary, I really wanted the show to give him the spotlight for a few minutes. What makes Gary so irresistible? Why do women physically fight over Gary? Oh wait, that's right -- we know the answers to these questions already. Sweaty desperation is what makes girls duke it out over Gary. (I tried to use the word "Gary" several times just like they did in the case.)

I watched 3/4 of the case of the sisters-dental bill case and swore that the defendant had a teardrop tattoo. My thoughts: Did she kill someone? Did she get it as a joke because she has one of those mouths that's a perma-frown? Is it because she's always upset, like Judge Judy is, that her sis refuses to move her hair out of her face? Does it represent the tears shed by her eyes and ears after having to listen to her sister's voice for much of her life? But no, the reason for tears was revealed --- Her hubby was busy banging Miss Tendrils, even when she was in Labor & Delivery having his baby! Then, the actual truth came out (to me, visually) -- it wasn't a tear. It was a mole magnified by a pair of thick glasses.

And I think Jewish Apple Cake is a bundt. Okay, I'm so hungry for bundt cake right now.

And in case we were wondering, JJ likes to bring a bottle of Rose or a bundt cake when she is invited to a friend's house. Something about her sharing this struck me as funny.

I've noticed a pattern -- the deadbeat dads always announce that they buy diapers. These men consider occasional diaper purchases to be proof of their status as a responsible father. Wonder what they claim to contribute after the potty-training phase? Hmmm...let me take a wild guess. When guys on Judge Mathis claim to make off-the-books type of contributions for their children, Judge Mathis tells them that they're only hurting themselves in the long run (if they are truly making contributions, as they claim). He reminds them that all of those dollars are not being tracked and officially counted as child support. Therefore, the mother could claim, at any time, that they haven't received any money at all, and the courts could require the man to pay years of back child support. Again, this scenario assumes that the man was actually giving money with some regularity.

I think I remember that in the beginning of the case, she said that she had been charged with that three times. And she said it with full IDGAF 'tude. Who knows if she was low-balling it by saying three. So, maybe there are several victims in addition to her daughter.

I just want to give Lashapale Copes a hug. That poor young lady. How sad that she said she just wants her mother to start being the mother she's supposed to be. Sadly, her mother doesn't connect with that realm, and she won't ever meet that expectation. Her mother's evil eye, eye-rolling, and stankface were sickening. And then her comment in the hallterview about "letting her" move in when she was 17 -- what a dirtbag. I'm not even all that mad at Lashapale's stepmom for her creative Section 8 situation. This case really hit me.

So true. I don't know why Dante bothers to play detective with anything involving Sonny. When Dante gets a call about his father's misdeeds, he might as well say, "eff it, I'm not going over there. Total waste of time." He could use that extra time to figure out where the hell Rocco is. I appreciate that. I'm usually that person, too. :)

I just caught up on last week's episodes. ER's attempts at crying are as bad as the girl who plays Jocelyn's. But the actor playing Andre did a great job -- real tears and runny nose. I hope he sticks around, despite the breakup, because I think he's a decent actor (and, damn, he's handsome). If beauticians can make Barbara Bush look great for a football game just a week or so after she was released from the ICU, then someone can make KSt look better. Get some quality extensions (and if her natural hair is falling out, then just use clip-ins during tapings). Stop with the brown-smudge contour rouge. Bring back the fashionable outfits. I finally realized that Sonny's surveillance man is ESPN's Stephen A. Smith and not a doppelganger, like I've thought. I googled it and read that he's been a fan for 40 years, and it led to him being cast. I always think it's funny to see who's a soap fan. I must say that I actually liked when Sonny popped up when Jordan was at the door...because it felt a bit unexpected. And so little on GH isn't 100% predictable. But the truth is, I guess I just forgot about the rabbit holes and time travel -powered highways in Port Charles. The show's use of the 80's scenes of Finola and Tanja adds so much special sauce.