Mothra

Something these Returning Citizens have in common with those who are in love (after lockup): many of the young men feel that now that they're out of prison, no one and nothing should be able to set rules for them, and they seem genuinely surprised that anyone would expect them to follow the rules--they're out of jail! They're free! They don't have to do things they don't want to do! Like abide by the rules of parole. The guy who's staying with the hoarding psychiatrist says "I don't go with that" when he's told that hanging out with his buddy from prison will be a violation that could put him back in prison and seems disappointed that the wacky doc wouldn't lie for him. The extreme rules set by Sharna and Mark are another example. Most of the rules are ridiculous, and a man who was not dependent on S&M's goodwill would be right to challenge them. But "William Steel" knows this isn't forever; he has to put up with this shit--and it's got to be less shitty shit than he had to put up with when he was incarcerated--just until (a) parole expires or (b) he gets a damn job and can get out of there to find a more congenial living situation. He's bright enough to understand this, surely, but criminal's gotta crim, I guess.

Yeah, but at least Daonte got his rocks off, right? Right?

*And* he confessed earlier that his big worry was that Christine would hook up with some "sleazo" (hmmm... you worry that history would repeat itself, Cootie?) who would "take all my money--he even made her promise that wouldn't happen. *Then* it's "oh, yeah... um... I'd miss my kids, too." He says he doesn't mind *watching* them but doesn't want to do activities with them. As a mother of just two, I know what that means. "As long as I can sit here and watch my football game/work on my Ponzi scheme while the kids play quietly and leave me alone, I'm happy to take care of them while you go get your Pap smear." But he has zero interest in going hiking with them or in any other activity that would interrupt his whatever-it-is-he-does. It's almost as if Cootie sees his children (and sometimes his wives) as accessories to bolster his image of a poly dad. Why hasn't he talked to the other poly dads we've seen him describe as friends? How do they keep their wives happy? How do they conceal their favoritism? We've seen "therapy" slide off his back like grease off fried bologna.

Christine has decided she no longer believes in plural marriage because her part of a plural marriage is really no marriage at all. Meri for some reason wants to stay in a plural marriage; she wants to renew her sexual relationship with Cootie, so she's staying. She's happy, I guess, with the lifestyle being on the show affords her, and she probably spends a lot of her time pushing those leggings she sells. So she stays, but she's not really in what I would call a plural marriage. Janelle "gets what she wants" from Cootie; I'm assuming no sex and no pressure to do much of anything she doesn't want to do--again, not really a plural marriage. Robbery is perfectly happy to stay in a plural marriage because she isn't really in one, either. She and Cootie are monogamous--there's not even "favorite" involved here--she's his *only* wife in reality. I don't think you can say it's really her *fault,* exactly, but she certainly has done nothing to discourage the little pecks on the cheek and just general warmth Cootie shows to her and not to any of the other wives. In earlier seasons, it did seem to me that he was at least trying to spread the Cooties around, but gradually I think he just said fuck it. No, Cootie, this is all on your shoulders. You've alienated a lot of your children and lost the wifely love of 3/4 of your women. You should've tried harder not to be so obviously in love with Robbery. Most of us, I think, roll our eyes at the suggestion of polygamy, assuming it's a cheap and easy way for a man to whore around without worrying about getting the clap; if that were true, wouldn't Cootie be able to service even Mery? He could lie there and think of Joseph Smith.

"Bill" explained that in prison you don't have paper towels or Kleenex, so you use tp for everything. I still don't understand how he could use so much of it--there've been times when I was out of Kleenex and used tp (and I have allergies and chronic sinusitis, so I blow my nose *a lot*), and my record--with my husband, mind--was maybe two and a half rolls a week. I want to know what the hell "Bill" is using it for. Maybe to piss off Mark?

Yep. That's another indication to me that that wasn't really Glenn's office, but a storeroom of some kind, or maybe overflow office workspace. How inconvenient if when opening your office door you had to be careful not to touch the alarm bar! I suspect Glenn didn't want his real office shown, maybe because he's a more private person than everyone else on this shitshow.

Agreed. Taking care of a patient who needs round-the-clock attention (and administering medication might not be something you'd want to assign to an elderly man who has to wake up in the middle of the night to do it) especially since the consensus is that Glenn does not insist on Babs' doing her entire PT routine is a tough, tiring job, and it's not fair for Whitney to assume/pressure/dictate that Glenn will devote his entire day and night to staying home and caring for Babs. The news that Babs was back in the ER raises the question of whether she'll ever be able to return to her home, if she'll need to be in a skilled nursing facility rather than the assisted living place where she is now, where Glenn can live with her. Babs may die before she is able to have any more treatment. If Glenn retires, what is he supposed to do with his day? I also didn't think that was Glenn's formal office, but a place where he does some of his work. As a VP, he'd have to have a comfortable setting for meeting clients, somewhere he had access to his own workspace and room for visitors to sit comfortably. Re: dick pics. What the hell? Do any of the women here find them sexy or alluring? I get it that men may be aroused by pictures of women's private parts, but I've never met a woman who seriously was turned on by pictures of men's junk. Differently wired, I cguess. Whitney's half-assed attempt to fix up Heather and Lennie reminded me so much of her ambivalent feelings around Buddy and Heather (and his other girlfriends). Creepy.

I wonder if it would be possible to have a legal semi-prenup that specifically excludes Brittney (or however the hell she spells it) from responsibility for the $140,000 restitution he owes? I think that's really the only reason for wanting a pre-nup with Ray as far as Brittney's family is concerned. Once again we were cheated, left standing here with our dicks in our hands, when Dentistry apparently went into labor. She told her ?!!husband??? to tell the ER personnel she was 7 months pregnant. I'm no OB, but she looks more than 7 months gone to me. Is the 7 months a myth to make her ????!!husband?? believe he is the father of this li'l rascal? That's what *I* think. Seeing these women reluctant to tell their significant others that they are pregnant jogs and jiggles my brain a little. Even before the recent Supremes ruling, none of them seems to have considered the option of abortion. I wonder why that is? Did anyone on this show abort a surprise pregnancy that I just can't remember? Is Chazz just now getting the message that Branflakes wants nothing to do with him? He seems an intelligent and sensitive person. I guess all the blood from his brain drained into his dick. I'm glad he finally got laid--that might have allowed the blood to move back into its normal pattern of flow. I don't know what's up with Chance's finances. It's true that it can be a good idea to establish credit by borrowing, then paying back in full the next day, but will that work with the mortgage lender at the bank? Chance apparently has no job and no source of income other than what he can borrow on his credit cards. I wonder if he knows that whatever the spending limit on a credit card is (say $5000) counts as a debt, whether you use that full amount of credit or not. If he has six credit cards, he already is in debt (as far as the mortgage lender is concerned) six times whatever the upper limit on the credit card, e.g. $30,000 with a $5000 limit on each. With no job, and fresh out of the slammer. I want to witness his interview at the bank.

I agree, but the rule wasn't you can't put meat in our fridge. It was you can't use our fridge, period. Although his interest in using the fridge seems to be to keep meat in it.

Bill continues to demonstrate his total lack of conmanship. You don't quit your job until you have a new job lined up. That's basic good sense, not even requiring criminal intent. And to further dumb it up, he sort of threatens that he'll move out; I guess he's counting on Sharna's crush to cause her to loosen things up in order to keep him there. Edited to add: Mark and Sharna *are* married, right? They are introduced with the words "partners." I'm glad the poster above guided us to the Soap Dirt article, which confirmed something I had begun to suspect: this guy's name isn't "William Steel," which might explain why people have had a hard time finding out just what he was in prison for. One source says possession of cocaine; he says he was a glamorous jewel/art thief--which I now absolutely do not believe. I do believe that his story is heavily production-driven. I think the little-girl bedroom decor was production's demand, and maybe some of the stupider rules, like he can't use the refrigerator, too. I do not believe he has friends who can help him out with an alternative housing arrangement; I think he was approached with this scenario and offered money to take part. I think Tiffane's friend is absolutely beautiful. Her story makes little sense, too, and smells of Matt Sharp's aftershave.

Yeah, plus we wouldn't have had that random old guy wandering through.

Well, if Abbotswood is anything like the ASF here in Bucks Co PA (read: rich old folks), they closed the facility down to outsiders and vaccinated (and boosted) all the residents, who were not allowed to leave the facility for a couple of months. You might be right, though: Maybe they declared the living room off-limits for the filming--which takes me back to my point: why didn't they film in Babs's apartment instead of taking over the communal living room?

My dog in heaven, does Whitney *never* cover her body in public? Nobody else is visiting the old folks wearing a goddam sports bra and cringingly clinging tights. My mother was in a joint exactly like Abbotswood, and I swear the staff might well have asked a visitor dressed like Whitney to go to her loved one's room to wait, or go home and put some clothes on. In my mother's place, the living room was always pretty full of old folks reading the paper, or magazines, or chatting. They worked jigsaw puzzles there together. They were all dressed nicely, all coiffed and everything (on-site hair salon), and they were all having a good time. I am charitably choosing to believe it was the presence of the tv crew which chased the old folks out of their living room, but it can't help that their *home* was invaded by this braying, half-naked crazy person and her family. They went to a lot of trouble to furnish Babs's apartment for their comfort; why won't they let the rest of the community have their living room back and go film in Babs's apartment? The only reason I can see for Whitney et al. being in the communal living room was to let her greet the old guy by name (showing how involved she is in the life of the facility) and to bring up the threat of dance lessons. These old people don't want dance lessons from Whitney. Mother's facility had occasional dances, and the old folks danced the way they did when they didn't live in an ALF. Is Whitney going to teach them to twerk? What dance move we've seen her do would appeal to people in their 70s, 80s, 90s? And will Whitney wear her dance class bra and tights to demonstrate all these moves?

In this photo, it looks like her rabbit teeth have been filed down, which was the reason, she said, for the braces. This makes no sense. Why didn't she just say, "I've got these two front teeth that are longer than the rest of my top teeth, and I'm going to have them shaved down?" And then explain to us what the braces were for. I agree that she had straight teeth beforehand; I don't understand what the braces (top and bottom) are supposed to do. Unless. Trimming down the top front teeth put everything else out of alignment. I think that must be it.

Bill is the stupidest ex-con I've seen yet. He has a sweet situation, and all he has to do is play along. Why in the *hell* would he take off speeding and doughnutting in Mark's car? Why would he brag to Mark about high-speed chases? What a dumbass. Now he has guaranteed that Mark isn't going to let him use the family car. So easy to have driven cautiously, courteously listening to Mark's baby-driver instruction. And why keep asking about movies he knows S&M disapprove of? He's so fucking stupid. If he was a successful thief, he must have been of the smash-and-grab variety; a con man he is not. Why is he telling Sharna about his girlfriend? Why does he keep pestering them about easing the house rules? If he had access to the car, he could get a job and then go buy a hamburger any time he wanted, without rubbing Sharna's nose in it. Christ almighty, he's stupid.

I don't think she ever took it. I forgot about the Big Girl Dance Class, which she was apparently doing before the show started. I don't know how long that lasted; she began to lose interest, I think, when having a show opened other possibilities to her, and that's a shame. Before she faded out, it looked like that was a successful venture for her, and one which fitted the concept of the show. I bet those women who came to her class were really hurt when she lost interest in them.

Re: the promised premise of this show. I thought the "Fabulous" intended to convey the idea that although our gal is big and fat, she is able to be fabulous. The problem imo is that Whitney is unable or unwilling to stick with anything long enough to become fabulous at it. Well, there is another problem, too: the things she wants to do are things (like mountain climbing) where her size really does make success improbable. She engaged in ballroom dancing one time, and I think that would be a wonderful activity for her to pursue to demonstrate fabulosity. She already has dance training and should be able to learn the steps for the dances required for competitions. And the costumes and makeup *are* fabulous. She would have to get into condition, of course; those dances are physically demanding (ever watch a couple do the two-step?), but the show could let us see her progress, culminating in her participation in a low-level competition as the season finale. There must be other things she's attempted *one time* that, had she stuck with it, could have led to success despite her size. She could probably learn to ski, with special instruction, for example. Does she swim? Everything she does, she does half-assed. Even No Body Shame campaign sort of faded away, and we haven't see other fat-pride activists wanting to work with her for a long time now. She doesn't want to be fat and fabulous. She wants to be slim and beautiful and have a boyfriend, as do many young women. But that's not what the title of the show promises.

Well, I'm glad Babs' family won't be inconvenienced by a long drive to go see her every day. As SunnyBeBe says, though, Babs may not be spending a lot of time in her room. If she's getting intensive therapies and if her facility requires her to show up in their dining room for meals, she probably will use her room mostly for sleeping. It will be nice for her family, however. I'm also glad to see Whitney's dog being more comfortable with people than she was earlier. Wasn't the dog's name French for "poodle" or something equally pretentious? This is the same dog, right? About Whitney's braces: She's finally getting a hint about her beaver front teeth. I don't understand how braces are going to fix them unless the braces include chains that pull those buck teeth back up into her gums. She specifically said that those two teeth were the reason for the braces--I hope someone will explain how braces are going to help.

I haven't finished watching the episode, but I am amused that the Thores thought you could just pick out your preferred assisted living situation and move right in. What dopes. I also love the fact that they choose their convenience (avoiding a 45-minute drive) over Babs' doctor's recommendation. I realize 45 minutes is a long way to go every day (remind me, what was Glenn's commute time?) but if she's only going to be there a month or so, I'd think they could bite the bullet. Especially since Babs' doctor might have been able to pull strings to get her into the facility he recommended. What a bunch of innocents. Who think they know everything. BTW in Charleston WV ten years ago a double in the best assisted living facility in town cost $5000/month, not counting therapies, and was not covered by Medicare or excellent private health insurance.

I don't think either of them is to blame, exactly, for the sad situation they find themselves in. I do think it's clear that Branwin is either heavily using or is deeply depressed, and whichever it is needs to be addressed. Does parole come with regular drug tests? I'd like to know for sure one way or the other if she really is as high as she seems. All the time. Part of me wants to wonder if stripping for a living has made her use drugs to numb herself to what her work entails, or even if she is depressed (if she is depressed--and it sure seems to me like she is) because of her work. I've been taken to a couple of strip clubs (as a joke ha ha) and found that nothing softs off the men sitting around the bar quicker than having an old lady give the dancer $5 and engage in conversation about how the dancer's body aches at the end of her shift, how she wants nothing more than to get into a tub of hot water--but she doesn't have any trouble staying in shape. IOW, normal kind of talk; not druggy and not depressed. Happy to talk to a woman for a change, but not miserable stripping for me. I respect Chazz for not being a jerk about sex with her. He has been more patient that any man I could imagine, and I think he must really have felt a connection with her while she was in prison. If he were sticking with her only for the promise of sex, I don't think he would have stuck around even this long.

Of course, but I don't think she is capable of telling him the truth. Does she have any obligation to stay married to him re: parole or anything? I don't think she does. Something about Branwin makes me think she exists outside of our reality--maybe it's the drugs. Chazz is seemingly compos mentis but he too is having trouble breaking it off. I guess hope springs eternal in the horny dick.

This. For a while I thought she was accustomed to doing sex only while high, or only as the perfect ending to an evening of crotch-grinding lap dances, and the idea of actually expressing affection through sex was so alien to her it was frightening. I was hoping old Chazz would get her drunk and try again, but goody two shoes says that might get her back in jail. This theory died when time went on and she didn't just get herself drunk. And it became clearer and clearer that she *is* high all the time. I think Chazz was her ticket out of the slammer and a real disappointment in real life. She's crying and sucking her thumb and carrying on because a) she wants him to leave her alone and b) she doesn't know what else to do because her normal tools for expressive communication (g-string and pole) are not at hand. Chazz will never get laid. Leave her at the cabin and go home, Chazz. And as for Diversity--*she* knows she's not entitled to anything and isn't going to get anything from Shawn. She's having a good time--she's in the catbird seat. His wedding day--its success as a social/religious occasion, his standing with old Sarah and his children, everything in his life--are in her grimy tattooed clutches, and he knows it. She has him shitting bricks, and she's the master mason. We all--not just us here, but *all* the viewers who are not brain dead--will be disappointed beyond belief if she does not disrupt the nuptials. The disruptials. Who cares if Shawn marries old Sarah? Nobody. God bless and good luck. Who cares if Dentistry charges into the wedding and raises hell? We *all* do!

And I wouldn't put that past them. Those women better show up at Shawn's wedding or there's going to be hell to pay, Sharp.

That was my first thought--the kinds of illnesses Artie is suffering from can't be treated with much more than pain medication. And when she has her second hip replacement surgery, there'll be even more oxy in the house. She is a sweet woman, and I hope she won't let that guy (I'm unsure of names at this point) back in her house. The one I'm looking forward to watching unfold is Sharna and her husband vs. old Bill. Bill is accustomed to the finer things in life--he says he was a very successful jewel thief. Will it be the Rules or the Unicorns that cause the first explosion? Does Bill really have no other option? He's going to be big trouble for this couple, and I can't wait.

I understand that Shawn doesn't owe Density *any money at all*--that's why I love her so much. She knows it, Shawn knows it, we know it--*everybody* knows it--but that shouldn't stop a true grifter from grifting. Grifters gonna grift. Dentistry is like a goddam bulldog; she's not going to let go, no matter what the truth of the situation is. You have *got* to admire such devotion to her vocation, and I do. Maybe she'll get herself a wedding dress--in fact, I think both she and Kelly should show up all decked out for nuptials, and march down the aisle right after poor old Sarah (what a prize of a husband she's getting!).