laurakaye

As long as Caleb doesn't shout or scream his talking heads, and realizes that "Beast Mode Cowboy" might not play well amongst the others, he might do okay.

Slightly off-topic, but where do most of you go to watch old seasons of Survivor? I think it's high time I revisited Cook Islands.

I loved how excited Spencer and Joe were, congratulating each other (while Culpepper sat there with a fixed smile on his face). I'd like to see Joe and Spencer team up and go far. Shane was such a loose cannon. I don't typically enjoy seasons where I'm waiting for a cast member to have a meltdown, a la Brandon Hantz. It makes me think that they got past the casting process because they'd make for colorful television, when they rightfully should've been watching it in their living rooms.

Forgot Woo. Yes, he's included. Vince and Coach would be on the "Slightly Unhinged but We Think They're Mostly Harmless" tribe.

Am I the only one who doesn't like pre-game alliance talk? Part of the fun is the cast meeting for the first time and feeling each other out for possible alliances. This cast already knows each other and they've all talked multiple times, I'm sure. But I guess when a show has been on for so long, new formulations have to happen in order to keep it fresh. I feel like we're going to miss out on a lot of strategy because it already happened before they even hit the beach.

You know what - this is the ONE example I can think of to bring Dan back - if Boston Rob could also come back and play Dan's ego like a fiddle. I would PAY to watch that go down. Because Dan would be all, "ZOMG - Boston Rob chooses ME!! He likes me! He really likes me!!" as he pounds on his chestal area and shakes his man-boobs. Adding this to my "Survivor: Fantasy" episode along with bringing back Ozzy, Malcolm and Joe on the "Gorgeous Flowing Locks" tribe.

Oh, he knew. He totally knew. Like, he 150,000% knew.

OMG, Beast Mode is going to be on Survivor?! Aren't there enough people who haven't already been on a reality show who might like to be cast?

Reminded me of Cook Islands - didn't Yul tell Becky to practice lighting a fire as well? And she could barely do it with a set of matches. The stress must be enormous - it's a potentially million-dollar fire!

This is why I don't think Dan's apology to Shirin was real. I think he said what he said because he felt like he had to in an attempt to save face. If he was truly sorry, maybe he would've said something to Jeff along the lines of "we've discussed it privately, and Shirin knows how I feel," with an accompanying nod of recognition from Shirin. That didn't happen. And if I recall, Shirin remained expressionless during Dan's apology. I don't think Dan is sorry at all, he's just sorry Jeff made him apologize on national tv to a person he clearly does not like.

I applaud your entire post, but especially THIS. If being shallow is wrong, I don't want to be right. Bring back Joe and his ridiculously gorgeous mane of flowing curly locks every season for the rest of Survivor eternity, I say!

I feel like Survivor is bending towards trying to get a new audience on board, rather than keeping what works for the old-school fans. The weird editing, the clear "characters," and the quick filming of #32 to get it on air before #31 irks me a little bit. I would like to see a season with no theme repeats, no returnees, no superfans, and no "hidden" immunity idols stuck in the forks of odd-looking trees. While I'm sure everyone who applies at this point has seen the show, perhaps casting needs to be tightened up better?

Will the "Second Chances" season be aired next, even though season 31 has already been filmed? And do we have an air date yet for next season?

Rodney and Joaquin....I can so picture them heading to the clubs after the reunion to "get some." Rodney's hair and electric blue suit had me rolling.

Dan is this show's biggest attention hoor EVER. Laughing out loud during final tribal council. Speaking when Shirin was giving her "dead fish" analogy. Banging his stupid head against the desk while trying to decide who to vote for. Survivor is DAN'S SHOW and the rest of us get to watch him run it! Watch Dan act a condescending ass to all the women! Watch Dan produce "clever" sound-bites! Watch Dan shake his man-boobs! Watch Dan roll his eyes as hard and pointedly as he can (having practiced in the Ponderosa mirror)! Watch Dan try to backtrack against the fury of Probst! Gosh, but I am so glad he's gone. May he NEVER be invited back. EVER. I'd like to think that he pissed off Probst so much that Dan will never, ever get the chance to "redeem" himself.

This season seemed to be cobbled together by a new bunch of producers who weren't very familiar with Survivor. No pre- or post- Final Tribal statements to the jury was a glaring omission - this is what Final Tribal is all about, for crying out loud - letting the final 3 have their say, which may or may not sway the jury into their decision as to who deserves the million dollar prize. Less significant but still bothersome to me was Jeff's casual interacting with the cast right before a reward/immunity challenge, when the camera would pan away and we'd hear Jeff say something like, "Let's go!" or whatever. It seemed odd and out of place. As for the reunion, I wouldn't have minded if Jeff had tossed Mike the check and spent the rest of the hour jumping all up in Dan's business, showing him footage of Dan clearly trying to lie his way out of his own stupid behavior. For Dan to think that he can mess with the institution that is Survivor and call out everyone for his "bad editing," he deserved every single second of Jeff's wrath and more. Shut your trap forever, Dan. You will be remembered as the single biggest moron this game has ever seen, and that is saying something. That said, as much as I disliked this season, I will once again be counting down the days until the next season.

Thank goodness, I thought I was the only one who kept being weirded out by that...he goes from Patrick Starfish to an almost effeminate voice, sometimes in the same sentence. I can't say how many times I had to focus hard on my television when Mike spoke in his non-bear voice because I didn't recognize it.

I am currently laughing so hard at this, I think I hurt myself!

This. I love the visual of Dan & Co. trying to raise their hands higher than their fellow castaways, maybe throwing an elbow or two, to get Jeff's attention. And Dan's reaction when he gets booed by the audience. Because he'll be trying to figure out why it's not a standing ovation for his genius gameplay.

One problem I have had this season with these so-called "super-fans" is that they were all trying to create a Survivor persona that has already been taken. Rod trying to be Boston Rob. Max and Shirin strutting sans clothing a la Hatch. Dan attempting to be Rupert (I guess). That doesn't work for me - it's painful to watch, and it's odd that these new players seem to think that simply adopting someone else's personality is their ticket to the million. Give me a snarky Jenn or a stuck-in-a-dismal-alliance Sierra any day over someone thinking they are untouchable just because they stole someone else's character traits. It was that awful "Jeff.........(sob)........I love her........(sniff).........like you read about......." that made me want to punch my television.

At the reunion, I only want to hear from Jenn. Probst will provide her a name from the cast, and she will quickly ad-lib a one-liner about how much they suck. I don't even want to hear from the winner unless it's Mike, and only if he can speak in his non-Super-Dave voice (I know he can do it...every time he's used his "normal" voice on the show, I have had to do a double-take to figure out who's talking). I want to see a clip of Tyler going through Dan's bag, a quick cut to Dan's entire face going red with rage, and just as he opens his mouth to bloviate, cut to commercial. I would also like to have Ozzy and Malcolm in the audience, have Probst bring them onstage with Joe, and spend 10 minutes discussing who has the best hair. Then give Joe his fan favorite $100,000 while Dan sits there stupified, unable to believe that the check is not going to him, and CUT.

I agree...get ready to cringe extra-hard and extra-often during this one. You know Dan has been practicing his reunion sound-bites for weeks now. My eternal hope is that Probst doesn't let him speak at all. There's always one or two jurors who don't get to do anything but "sit there and look pretty." PLEASE let it be Dan this time! And maybe Tyler.

During the immunity challenge, I was LOL-ing every time Rodney chucked his grappling hook straight into the ground at his feet. I guess those magic melons didn't sharpen his brain as much as he thought. I seriously cannot remember the last time I didn't give a rat's ass who won this game. There have been boring seasons for sure, but not one where I wished that the entire jury would write down "NO ONE" on their final votes for the million. I am, however, greatly looking forward to Dan's condescending, heavily punctuated question to the Final 3. I hope I'm smart enough to understand him....'cause I'm a woman and all.

Now it all makes sense. Rodney meant to get in the "Big Brother" casting line, but got in the "Survivor" line by mistake.

I guess it depends on what your definition of "like" is. The "dislike" of most of the remaining survivors is so intense, I guess one could deduce that Carolyn is "liked." I need to know if the head of Survivor Casting has been fired yet, because this group is just ridiculous. Does Probst & Company truly think that this is a compelling cast? Have they been on the air so long that they think they can just coast now? Because I for one want to see this show get better and better. I understand the challenge here, in that most people who make it on the show have seen it and want to become memorable, but there has to be a better way than to throw this island of misfit toys together for our viewing pleasure.