BlackberryJam

Here is the original Penis Head Canons List. http://kittenbalerion.tumblr.com/post/105133227567/the-asoiaf-penis-headcanon-masterlist-if-you I think the Blackfish has a bigger dick that this list ...because I just DO. I have a few other issues here and there. Walder is pubic bald and his left nut hangs way way lower than the right. Jaime's cock is magnificent. He is half a god, isn't he? Ned has a small but adequate peen.

The Penis Headcanons. Seen it, disagreed with many of them and made the arguments. ;)

I am a 13 year old boy because this entire length discussion has made me giggle. I never imagined that Jon had to worry about length and I always thought Ned's sword would be more girthy than lengthy.

Except she's not trying to make the best of it. Trying to make the best of it would be making a solid attempt to get over the anger she feels at an innocent child and trying to give him a positive loving home. Catelyn is most definitely not trying to make the best of it. That's the point being made here. When faced with shitty options, she chooses the low road.

I love this. It's perfect.

I would think the reason to cast the Northern lords is for the Search for Rickon. Last we heard of him, Osha was taking him to Last Hearth. If we have Davos, Brienne, Sansa, etc out there looking for him, it makes sense to have some Northern lords around here and there for a couple of scenes.

Moved to casting thread.

Can't agree here. He either cheated on his wife and them shamed her by bringing his bastard child into their home for her to raise or lied to his wife about cheating on her and then bringing what she thought was his bastard child into the home for her to raise. Ned's shitty to women.

You don't know how wonderful it is to check back in and see that other people loved the episode and thought it was amazing. Yes, it is easier to bitch about that tiny scratch by the back passenger wheel well on your brand new Aston Martin Vanquish that it is to say JESUS FUCK HOLY HELL I'M DRIVING AN ASTON MARTIN VANQUISH. There were issues, as there are with everything everywhere that ever existed, but over all, this episode kicked the ass of almost every other television show I have seen this past year, except Hardhome, and that was a closer call.

HBO sues him into eternity, and I'm pretty sure D&D and HBO get the books pre-publication. They'd probably attempt to get an injunction to prevent publication so we'd never see them.

Running with the idea...maybe Bronn in on the plot as well. It's not like he hasn't abandoned someone before and he did say he'd kill anyone for a price. What if Doran offered him a bigger bag of gold and a better wife and castle?

Fight or flight? I don't know. Why would they need to fight for Thorne? If the NW is as weak as we've been led to believe, Wun Wun could take out almost all of them in one mighty stomp. Castle Black has shelter, provisions, etc. The Wildlings can simply overpower the NW and take over the Wall.

Aren't there still a fuckton of Wildling at the Wall? More than Thorne's 50 men a Castle Black.

Just an FYI on the body double, I believe she was wearing a pubic wig, and Lena Headey was making fun of it. Not the body double, but the pubic wig. So the blonde pubes were do-able for Lena. I'm not sure why she choose not to do the walk. Is there a specific term for a pubic wig? I do not want to google that.

Yeah...those boobs were not the boobs of a 40 year old woman who nursed three children nor was that that stomach of a woman who bore four children and had no access to that lovely stretch mark cream. That was the body of a 28 year old woman who worked out, a lot. There was no shame to be had in that body, totally different from Cersei's fears in the books. I did not coin Sexy Jesus. I think that was Gay of Thrones. Cersei = Blonde Cher Tyrion = Munch Munch Jaime = Brother D (Brother Dick) Brienne = Some play on Tilda Swinton...Maybe Busted Tilda? Sansa for a while = Orphan Brown Dany = Kristina Aguilera (I think.) I can't even remember them all. It's at funnyordie. It's hilarious.

Yep. She has the exact same facial expression in every scene up until the arrest scene. That's not nuance. That's boring. So many posts about Dillane elevating his material, yet the same can't be expected of Headey, if you disapprove of the material? Honestly, if you just cut out her face in every scene, no hair or background, you wouldn't be able to tell one scene from the other.

Oh, Cersei deserved the walk. As someone pointed out, BOO FREAKING HOO, she walked down a street naked and had people throw a few things at her. I mean, these are the starving people that she denied food because she wanted to be a bitch to her daughter-in-law. Poor widdle Cersei got her feets hurt. I mean, that's nothing to condoning her son's behavior of torturing women, trying to set up her brother to take a murder wrap and condoning the slaughter of all the dwarves in the kingdom. As to Nikolaj, he's been pretty open that he kind of read the first few books, but the just started searching for the name Jaime in his Kindle edition. His end of season interviews are all about how Jaime was trying to deal with guilt over Tywin and maintain the family, protect the family members. Nothing about how it was written as Jaime trying to get back in Cersei's good graces. In fact, I bet the scripts didn't say anything about Cersei at all.

Corkscrews don't sit around outside in the snow. Augers, used for boring wood, and probably repairing railings, do. It is a tool for boring holes in wood.

I haven't seen this mentioned here, but I really thought Trystane was in on the Fredo Kiss of Death plot to kill Myrcella. Myrcella was the one professing love, not him. He was douching it up like Justin Bieber. I realized I completely forgot Arya's plot. *yawn* I did feel like I was watching a bit of demon possession movie when she got all murdery. But otherwise, didn't care. Wait, I did love that Sexy Jesus can suicide and come back instantly. *waves at Jon Snow*

I haven't had time to read more than the first three pages but I have to jump in and say... I FUCKING LOVED IT. It was absolutely riveting television. I thought the action was wonderful and the pacing was perfect. I finally gave two shits about Sansa for once and I'm saying that's all because of her Winterfell storyline replacing her Adventures in Babysitting from the books. I liked Theon. I thought the abandonment of Stannis was pitch perfect, from troops, to Selyse, to Melisandre. And then he kills two dudes before he accepts justice from Brienne. Sour note for me was Dany because I was sure her dress was white last episode and then it looked blue. The dropping of the ring was so Hansel and Gretel-y. Loved Varys and Tyrion. Love that Daario and Jorah are going on a roadtrip of "Don't touch me, I have greyscale!" Did not like Myrcella at all so glad that's over with, although the dialogue was weak. Jaime's hot outfit is back. YES. Davos was perfection. The CGI of Cersei's head onto another body was weird, but I thought the Walk was perfect in that it just kept going to emphasize the awfulness. Fuck Qyburn though. Loved Kevan's look of disgust. Loved alive Kevin. Adored Jon and Sam's dudebro moment. Of course Olly is hateable, fuck that kid, but I thought the killing of Jon was perfect. I am now worried for Edd.

Jaime stood with Tommen during his coronation. Jaime had no lines in that episode, but NCW was paid for it. Jaime talked to Tommen at some point about being there to protect him. Then Jaime left town. I can see how it isn't showing a definite break from Cersei, but the Dorne story isn't showing ongoing attachment to Cersei either. By fixing things, I agree. Jaime set Tyrion free and Tyrion killed Tywin, making the Lannisters vulnerable. He most definitely wants to fix that. Jaime's break up from Cersei in the books is all in his head anyway. Cersei has no clue they are breaking up. But Jaime in S5 has show not one ounce of kindness to Cersei. He has provided her no comfort. They haven't even touched. Of course Jaime meant Cersei when he said the woman he loves line. That is Jaime being the romantic he has always been. That line is followed up by Analyst Bronn telling Jaime to question that love. Jaime just looks at him. Then Bronn kicks out the flames of the fire, symbolizing the dying fire of the JC relationship. Sure, I can see wanting more. We all want more. Brienne is my favorite. Brienne wants Jaime (look at how she never takes her hand off his sword *dirty thought*). So I want Brienne to have Jaime. We already know she loves him from her scene with Cersei. More would be fantastic. But what is there is pretty damn good.

What has Jaime said or done that makes you think he wants the relationship to work? He got the hell out of KL to save his daughter. He has not said Cersei's name once since. I see this a lot, Jaime is Cersei's lapdog and I feel like I'm watching a different show. All I see is Jaime being introspective instead of being a douchebag hothead who would kill everyone to be with Cersei. Instead, you know, he chose to leave her after he pointed out to her how vulnerable the Lannister family is. That's not someone trying to make it work. If he loved her the way he did in S1, since he is the one who has identified the threats in KL, he would have sent someone else to Dorne and stayed to protect her. Hell, he didn't give a fuck about the kids in S1. This is a totally different Jaime who doesn't care nearly as much about Cersei as he used to.

Exactly. I'd forgotten they hadn't gotten around to KGing Loras. Yeah, the whole, "There needs to be a spot open" thing is unnecessary for the show.

I just want to throw in that I think the Unsullied don't get, and the show doesn't care, that Cersei's champion has to be a member of the Kingsguard. So I really don't think the show will care about how many KG there are, if there is an open spot, that Strong needs to join to be champion. It really seems like a waste of screen time to have to bother with all that. Hell, the show doesn't even show any KG in KL other than....Loras right now?

Oh and Linda is disgusting. I do judge George for the friends he keeps.