DasFlavorPup

Great first episode - this is already looking much better than last season. Although Robbie Turner REALLY needs to switch to decaf. I kinda want to punch him in the nose, and thought all his talking heads meant he was going home first. Did NOT have Kim pegged as the winner of the first challenge. I thought for sure it was going to be Acid Betty for the runway, or possibly Derrick for the photo. To be honest, I had absolutely no clue which outfits the judges liked most. Not because they were close in terms of quality, but because of those damn lights flashing behind the queens the whole time made it impossible to really get a good look at any of them. The producers need to tone that shit down before someone drops of an epileptic fit.

Wow, when Sarah monotoned her notes on the Nonac submission, she sounded exactly like Daria Morgendorffer.

I've watched the finale three times now. Every single time that sad piano music starts to play and we get that long, lingering look at the now-empty guest room at the Mystery Shack bathed in that soft purple light... sniffle.

It ended, I leaned back with a sigh of contentment, lit up a cigarette, took a deeeep drag. And then burst into tears. Seriously, so good.

Am I wrong, or did one of those clips from the rest of the season clearly show the final five designers sitting on the sofa? Right before they showed some sort of nudity-related challenge?

Nah, based on the other trend that's been happening on every AS season, Dom lacks that necessary something to be the winner. And by "something", I mean "penis". Seriously, EVERY winner, including that one-episode special to kick off the Lifetime era, has been a male who was a favorite of the fans in their season.

Yeah, I've read enough Carolyn Hax and Dear Prudence to be under the impression that the whole "oh, but s/he'll CHANGE for our relationship" thinking is a steaming load that has a miserable short-term success rate and an utterly abysmal long-term success rate. I have far less sympathy for Abby than I think the writers want me to. Harris was a tool and I didn't like him or his ability to make philanthropy sound utterly self-serving, but I put far more of the blame of the failed relationship on Abby. He's open about how he doesn't want monogamy, and she and her friends decide to test him with that soiree and her kid being there, and he says "no, seriously, I don't want this". The hell'd she think was going to happen?

Yeah, sister dearest needed to get a damn grip. It was a dildo and some wigs and accouterments, and he's clearly a lonely guy - freak out when there are books bound with hooker skins or there are liquefied animal corpses in the fridge.

YAY - definitely the best possible outcome! But I have to say, I like Kelsey & Joey, but no way in HELL am I watching this season again. Feel bad for Diana - classy in losing, too. Justin? Nope - no sympathy. And guess what Justin - you didn't break, or even tie, the record for most 1st place wins. And y'know - outside the race, Chris and Logan might actually be... tolerable? Like, they showed a glimmer of self-awareness at the end that certain others *cough*Justin*cough* do not?

When you are being driven to a destination by a chauffeur in a Rolls Royce who already knows where he's supposed to be going, what you are doing cannot possibly be considered racing at that point. I mean, seriously??? Hey Justin, when you are being a douche, it doesn't matter if the person on the other end can understand what you're saying or not - you are still being a douche. And good racer or not, I have absolutely no sympathy for his crybaby horseshit, FAR less so than the first episode. Superfans have played this race before and have gotten knocked out early without even winning one leg, so if you don't win, boo-friggin-hoo if you go home with "only" the spoils of winning seven legs. He reminds me of one of those brats from elementary school who bursts into tears when he loses fair-and-square at tetherball or gets knocked out of four square. I have to admit, I was writing a post about how badly-paced this episode was, what with teams already heading to the pit stop halfway through the episode and the next-to-last arriving with fifteen minutes to spare, but, yeah, THAT happened. Although I do wish the outcome were different.

The cheerleaders tried to U-Turn someone, and had no problem with it. But when another team does it, and to the boys they like, suddenly it becomes a huge outrage to them. And I seriously doubt that same outrage would have been on display had any other team been on the receiving end of the U-Turn. #RadonRedux has nothing to do with my irritation in this case, even though I do find Justin quite irritating.

That's right, they DID - now I actively dislike them, because... hypocrites.

The cheerleaders outrage at Texas being U-Turned irritated the hell out of me. Kelsey and Joey used it exactly the correct way: on a strong team where there was probably not going to be a better chance to eliminate them. Besides, it's not like the cheerleaders had any grounds to be actually morally outraged about it; it is a part of the RACE, and besides, they were just mad because the team getting U-Turned was the cute boys they were friends with.

It's not going to work for boosting ratings, I don't think. See also: the ratings for "The Chair", which cast a YouTube personality who has millions of subscribers as one of the two contestants making a movie (Shane Dawson). Also, to say the movie didn't make a lot of money would be an understatement.

Candice is like a character Parker Posey would play in a Christopher Guest mockumentary about the fashion industry. Hilarious as movie character, insufferable PITA in real life.

Maw, get th' gun. Old Yeller-and-Red-Flags done gone mad.

I have a feeling that the deal with the mattress guy isn't going to come to pass. His attitude, combined with his unwillingness to disclose some numbers at the beginning of the pitch, makes me think something is going to fall apart during the follow-up diligence checks when the attorneys get involved. And yeesh, rent my property out to a bunch of college football fans for a weekend? Sure, right after I get done domesticating this hive of Africanized bees.

The mangling of "Liberté, égalité, fraternité" by nearly all the teams set my teeth on edge, and the FitBit product placement was beyond obnoxious. Other than that, a good episode. I liked that there was finally some more placement shuffling in this leg even though Green finished first yet again - wasn't expecting another double-length leg. Maybe there's no NELs this season? Diana wasn't much of a personality, but now that she's showing flashes of Logan, I think I liked her better before. I'll give some leeway, though, since all the personality I'm seeing is in reaction to Justin's, and I guaran-fucking-tee I'd have clocked him by now. And Chris and Logan were surprisingly tolerable this episode, which was a nice surprise. That fifth place finish on the previous leg really seemed to revitalize the cheerleaders, and now they're finally finishing near the front which I like since they're one of only two teams I'm actively rooting for. Make a note Justin, THAT is the appropriate response to a 2nd place finish for every leg, except the last one.

A company I do occasional contract work for helped fund a Kickstarter a few years ago for the Three Jerks when they were starting up. They sent samples as part of the thank-you package and I tried a bit. Honestly? I thought it wasn't very good, and certainly not worth the price tag. The flavor wasn't any better than a pack of Jack's Links, and in fact I thought the regular flavored stuff was kind of bland. And as far as texture I have to say the extra fat in the filet that makes it so delicious grilled or broiled, gave a really nasty feeling in the mouth when it was smoked down and reduced and part of the beef jerky. Not to mention that I hate the thought of an expensive cut being used for something like this. It's like taking an excellent filet of Ahi tuna and making a Campbell's soup noodle casserole with it.

I liked seeing the drop from season 1 show up again. However, to make it a Roadblock where only one team could perform it at a time is kind of bullshit. It guaranteed no position changes during the task, and the Detour and Roadblock tasks should be such that there should ALWAYS be potential for placement changes during the task. I'm not counting the navigation brain fart that the Paparazzi and Docs had, because to me that's not part of the actual doing of the Roadblock, if that makes sense. Also, what bugged me about this episode is that it was clear about 10 minutes in that any team who did croquet in the previous episode was going to be in the upper tier of teams and everyone who stained the giraffe was going to be racing to avoid last. The fact that both groups of 4 had some shuffling of placement within each group spoke well of this leg's design (although not too much since the Express Pass and Failure to Read the Damn Clue played big parts), but the tiering caused by the last leg's Detour ruined some potential major placement changes, which bugs. Especially since two of the teams in that upper tier irritate me (no points for guessing which two). Nice to see someone other than Green or Texas win a leg, finally. And I WAS going to give slight props to both teams for being less annoying this leg, until Justin's ridiculously ungracious "2nd place is the first loser" speech. Shut it, toolkit. I would not have guessed that the track stars would be eliminated before the cheerleaders, and for a brief shining moment I thought we were going to be rid of the Paparazzi. Disappointing, but just a little, since I'm having a hard time finding teams very compelling this season, probably owing to the airtime eaten up by that damn feud.

I had the same thought, like they were doing some sort of greatest hits/circle-of-life thing for their last season by using so much from their first season. It also occurred to me that with all of Texas' scheming to get to the U-Turn first and their burning of the Express Pass to try and do so, they completely forgot about one very important possible use for their EP: that if they aren't the first team there they can just use their Express Pass to bypass the Detour if they ARE U-Turned. Unless they are still in that arrogant mindset that they will just always be ahead of everyone (although so far they annoyingly have been for the most part).

That would be smart, sooooo.... not gonna happen from those two.

So, we have a leg that was 90% listening to two 100% annoying teams plotting against each other. And absolutely 0% came of it - not even an elimination AND a lame TBC note to end on. Boo.

Well, shit. Looks like this stupid feud between Justin and team Texas is going to go on all season, which is especially annoying because I don't like either of these teams. Justin needs to cram it with walnuts, and Tanner & Josh confirmed at the Detour what some other posters suspected last week; that they were arrogantly taking it as a given that they'll win the whole thing and that other teams are going to be behind all the time. Doubly irritating because it's usually true for the alpha male teams.

For me, the most memorable twins from "The X-Files" would have been the Eves: http://iv1.lisimg.com/image/2658230/600full-the-x-files-screenshot.jpg "We just knew."