ivygirl

Lord of the Flies: Beverly Hills Edition

Oh geez. “But as ‘business’ women,we would cater to... society! And she would swim in those circles, too.” Why do I feel like that was less about business and more along the lines of “‘business,’ if you catch my drift”? And I can only imagine the food! Barbara’s TH shirt looks like one of the tops I made for my disco-era dress up doll (I want to say Darci but I can’t find the right one).

Hmm, let’s try out some titles for his business card... Chief Candy Crusher CTO (Chief Tetris Operator) Controller, Fishdom Pokemon GO Community Lead Head Maurader, Clash of Clans

I watched Perry Mason right before rewatching the episode, and I had residual crime-drama suspense for the first few minutes. I was half wondering when Raymond Burr would pop out and ask pointed questions about the texes. If only this drama were run like an episode of Perry Mason. First half hour, watch the story unfold, and you suspect one person. Second half hour, the courtroom. Everyone testifies and Perry Mason somehow deduces who REALLY dunnit. That’s all this stupid puppygate warrants, if that. LOL, I caught that too! Well, actually I first noticed that she asked for a Mitchell Ahda, which she’d return if she didn’t like it. Really? A michelada, Dorit? Just order the margarita; you’re not impressing anyone.

Then LVP starts getting mysterious texes from someone claiming that “someone from a reality show” dropped off Katie at the shelter... they checked her chip and noticed that she should really have been returned to SUR. Teddi gets her brother Hud (who works at TomTom) involved, people start blaming LVP for starting the rumor that Katie was abandoned by Tom, Jax starts yelling about LVP being a master manipulator, Kyle cries... what a mess.

Exactly. Lala has “redeemed” herself. James doesn’t care and keeps repeating the same behavior that alienates him from most of the group. And yes, though every one of them does crappy things, they all have a history with one another. James is still basically a hanger-on who wormed his way into “their” (haha) show via a put-on relationship with Kristen. LmDo any of them actually hang out with him in any capacity once filming ends? Aside from something like Coachella?

Is that even a question? Everyone needs a side of boomchickboomchickboomchick with their bottomless mimosa and Spanish omelette.

But Penny is amazing! She’s told us so herself 🤣

Can we talk about Brittany taking a Jell-O shot when she’s probably on Tylenol+Codeine? Nothing like mixing booze with a Class III narcotic! Yikes.

LOL Grumpy Cat WOULD notice 😉

Super tiny table of one, but I have a soft spot for *Katie.* Probably because of her accident, and the thought that maybe, just maybe, the accident really did leave her with some sort of injury that busted up her mental wiring. (A reason, not an excuse.) None of these people have any kind of moral high ground, but Sandoval (and of course, James) bear the primary responsibility here. Sandoval flies off the handle and gets way too defensive of people who really don’t have that much defense.

😒 More like “fizzle reel”. Who’d want to watch them? Seriously. I’d rather watch an Erika Jayne spin off focusing on her foray into the fashion world with Cuntkins(TM). Speaking of spin offs, why would LVP want to have a spin off launch with one of the dullest whatevergates we’ve had on this RH show (if not all of them)? If she’s “masterminding” the spin-off, what a dull way to do it. Rinna is seriously losing her last hinge on this one.

Don’t forget the (predictable, but still) bottle of Skinnygirl Disgusting Rose placed label-out (no matter where the camera was positioned) during lunch. I kept looking at those rolls on the table during the lunch at Bethenny’s and drooling. I’m doing weight watchers and I’ve drastically cut back on the amount of bread I’ve been eating. Those little slider rolls/dinner rolls/Hawaiian rolls are my kryptonite.

I’m enjoying the Ramona chat. Not sure why but I’ve had a soft spot for her ever since I started watching RHONY (the season after Bethenny left). My favorite Ramonas are Earnest Self-Made Businesswoman Ramona and Getting After Bethenny In Order to Get Into the Scene Ramona.

I know. Just venting. At least the rest are real businesses. I don’t trust That there’s much “there there” with BB.

What was Dorit wearing at that dinner? Why is it ok for Dorit to play dumb, and Rinna to stoke the fires on this conversation that she’s not even a part of (and attempting to stage a coup to be HBIC), but LVP is the one “playing dumb” and acting as a master manipulator? Why are we subjected to shot after shot of Beverly Beach crap? Why didn't I fast forward through 90% of this?

Oh no. Is she going to tweet out another photo of her kids and tell people that they shouldn’t call her out on her stuff because she’s a nice person?

No joke. That show is Bor. Ing. No number of magnums of Whispering Angel could convince me to start watching that snoozefest again. I just can’t make the math work on Sandoval and Ariana’s baby conversation. It seemed far more about “being progressive” than about the reality of raising a kid, especially for Ariana. “You can be as involved as you want” doesn’t seem especially practical—Say they stay together, but Sandoval adopts kids, and Ariana votes for zero involvement. Is he going to keep them in a soundproof room, totally out of her sight? Maybe build them an in-law unit? As much as FI could be a good dad and is enthusiastic about that—even as a single dad, and as much as Ariana is well within her rights to say hey, I don’t want kids EVER—and don’t try to convince me otherwise, I’m *shudder* with Jax...unless this is all for show, they should probably cut their losses and move on from one another. Theory is one thing but the practicalities of life are another.

Why does the bit in bold sound like it’s going to be the most interesting part of this episode?

I hear ya, but I do wonder if Denise is a tiny bit different, given that, prior to RHOBH, she’s been in the public eye in a much different way than Teddi was. One can hope, but who knows 😉

(Sorry FN... I accidentally deleted the WHOLE quote!) BOY, Teddi’s Insta post was a desperate and transparent grab for sympathy. “Let me post this picture of me and my cherubic kids in order to make you feel guilty about your comments.” I don’t love seeing nastiness online (or anywhere), but at the same time—Teddi SHOULD be accountable for how she acts. If she really “recanted” her opinion and regretted her behavior, there are ways she could subtly hint at it without violating any terms of her contract. Actually... some respectable online programs (usually associated with brick-and-mortar universities) do grant PhDs.

Maybe Jax can help get Mamaw’s Beer Cheese on the menu.

Katie looks amazing in person—not “fat” by anyone’s standards, except maybe “normal” TV standards. Or the amazing DJ James Kennedy’s.

Caption This! “I can’t believe I’m getting paid $200 to pretend how amazed I am that this woman walked by.” “Wow... is that THE COUNTESS from my very favorite Bravo television show, The Real Housewives of New York, new season premiering March 6 at 9 Eastern/8 Central?”

Waaaaaaaaaaayyyyyy too excited that I just saw Katie on Hollywood Boulevard. I looked up from staring at the stars and was like, “hey, she looks familiar... IT’S KATIE!1!1!!!1!1” Thankfully I just smiled and she smiled back genuinely. She was with Schwartz but I didn’t catch that until I turned around to see if she was. She was really pretty. I have to think that, to a degree, they like to be seen. She didn’t look annoyed that I recognized her.