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ELR Quotes: Turd Hats?

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WildStyle

WildStyle

Ray "I don't see any Lilies of the Valley "

Frank "I see a pansy of the family"

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(after beating Ray arm-wrestling)

Marie "Frank see what you did! He's hurt!"

Frank "And i'll take his sandwich too!" 

(Frank grabs Ray's lunch,and eats it)

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Frank "What in Hell's bathroom was that?!"

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(Frank singing karaoke)

Frank "Than you, ladies & gentlemen. My wife thinks i'm in the bathroom"

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Marie "You are not getting a tv in the bathroom!"

Frank "Then i'm bringing the toilet into the livingroom!"

  • Love 1
BogoGog24

BogoGog24

Pat: When you find a rodent in your basement, you don’t want to bang it with a shovel. But you do!

The way Georgia Engel says this in her trademark baby voice makes it that much more hilarious.

 

Marie: Your father and I have been married for 40 years. We’ve seen the lows and we’ve seen the highs.

Frank: What day was the high?

 

I can’t remember the exact quote but in the same scene of that episode Marie is talking about how no marriage is perfect and goes “Look how he eats.” It’s just the way she says it that cracks me up. 

  • Love 2
schnauzergirl

schnauzergirl

11 minutes ago, BogoGog24 said:

Pat: When you find a rodent in your basement, you don’t want to bang it with a shovel. But you do!

The way Georgia Engel says this in her trademark baby voice makes it that much more hilarious.

 

Marie: Your father and I have been married for 40 years. We’ve seen the lows and we’ve seen the highs.

Frank: What day was the high?

 

I can’t remember the exact quote but in the same scene of that episode Marie is talking about how no marriage is perfect and goes “Look how he eats.” It’s just the way she says it that cracks me up. 

In that same episode, Amy asks how can there be hate in a marriage and Marie says "You make room."  Three little words, but Doris Roberts was the best around with those kind of comments.

  • Love 3
WildStyle

WildStyle

You're the one who sunk us, Molly Brown!

And you're the one who ate the whole bologna!!!!

 

Or when they fight over who Frank & Marie should live with.  

Robert "I'll fight ya both!"

Amy "Robert!"

Robert "NO! I don't care anymore! I'll go to prison. Put her on your shoulders Raymond!"

Ray "I don't need her."

Robert "How about I hit you with your own wife!"

WildStyle

WildStyle

6 minutes ago, deaja said:

“She has a way of appearing to give a compliment, but really she’s insulting you!”

I think my favorite is when he talked about Frank.

 

Your father has been tearing around on his cart, endangering pedestrians. When our security guards warn him, he turns his cart & aims for them. One time he shouted "Hit the monkey, win a cookie." 

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BogoGog24

BogoGog24

I do love the scene in the episode when Robert interviews with the FBI and the agent receives Marie’s letter and reads it aloud.

 

From the same episode, Marie confesses later that she went to the diner and thought about what happened over some banana cream pie. Then says “Actually, it was coconut. I don’t know why I changed it.” So something Marie would do haha!

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CherryAmes

CherryAmes

Not a quote, a visual -  the episode where Robert joins the cult it starts with Ray talking about why he likes pickles. "They're a food and a beverage".  In the background we see Debra slowly leaning forward and resting her head against the fridge.  Her facial expression and sort of sad defeated movements make me laugh out loud every time.

  • Love 2
WildStyle

WildStyle

(edited)

My favorite Holy Crap moment from Frank, when the door comes off of the fridge when he opens it.

Holy Crappin' Crap!

The same episode when Roberts says he could teach Ray how to fix stuff.

That's true. You don't know a monkey wrench from a monkey's ass, do ya son?

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And Marie when she & Frank argue about him leaving 2 drops of juice in the fridge, and he does it again at the end of the episode. 

That son of a bitch

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Same episode where Ray asks Marie to come over and show Debra how to make her meatballs. He thinks Debra would like it, but she says it'd be a terrible. After she says it,Marie comes in, and she glares and Ray who says

I'm a good person. Really, I am.

Edited by WildStyle
  • Love 1
Guest

Guest

From Baggage:

Debra:You don't like the big fork and spoon?

Marie: We hate the big fork and spoon.

Debra: But they're like a fixture of the house- the big fork and spoon.

Marie: They're horrible- look at them. They're completely without nuance. 

Later on in the scene:

"Don't let a suitcase filled with cheese be your big fork and spoon."

And of course the ending

Marie "This is all your fault!!!!!"

Frank "Hey, when did we get those?"

WildStyle

WildStyle

(edited)

All from season 5 The Canister

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Frank "She was gonna yell at me like that later anyway. I ate the backside of that ham"

Marie (from the kitchen) "FRAAAAANK!!!!"

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Robert "Dad got into the ham. He's lopping of slices and putting it in the toaster. Like pork pop tarts."

Marie "It never ends with your father. Last year, I caught him in the car with it."

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Debra "I threw it in the outside garbage. Boys, where did you get this?"

Michael "In the garbage"

Ray (to Debra) "YOU GOTTA FEED THEM MORE!"

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Marie "I felt bad for thinking you didn't return this. And to be honest, whenever I see it now, it makes me think of your father-in-law. So I either give you this or give you him."

Edited by WildStyle
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Inquisitionist

Inquisitionist

Debra:  You listen -- if my parents lit an orphanage on fire on Christmas Eve, they wouldn't be as bad as your parents! (Fighting Inlaws clip)

 

Frank: You're still handsome, nice tan, you got all your teeth and then some.  What gives?

Warren: ... it's not all about looks and sex for me.

Ray: OK, but... is any of it?  (Older Women, which has tons of other great lines, too, but this scene slays me.)

  • Love 1
Guest

Guest

Assorted favorites:

Frank: Kill is going to Debra you. (The Older Woman)

 

Ray:  Look, you want to know what marriage is really like? Fine. You wake up- she's there. You come back from work- she's there. You fall asleep- she's there. You eat dinner- she's there. You know? I mean, I know that sounds like a bad thing. But, it's not. Not if it's the right person.

Frank: I'd like a minute for rebuttal.

ShadowSixx

ShadowSixx

Marie: I find Harriet Lichtman's flirtatious behavior towards you distasteful, but I do not hate that slut.

 

Natalia: What?! You're his wife? Ray said you were dead.

 

Debra: Their marriage was like a rock. The one solid rock for me.

Ray: Well maybe it was like a stone, and now it has passed.

 

Ray: Come on, look at the bright side the moustache will distract from the cellulite.

 

Frank: I always thought you had a Mr. Potato head face, and glasses come with the kit.

 

Marie: Oh stop Ray, I'm trying to heat up soup from a can.

Mrs. Hanson

Mrs. Hanson

(edited)

"Okay, I am REALLY TISSED!"

On 1/3/2018 at 9:11 PM, BogoGog24 said:

From that same episode my favorite part has always been when Ray and Robert fondly reminisce about all the treats their grandma made in that canister until finally Debra shouts, “Hey fat people! Who cares?”

Me too!!  

Per The Canister:  "You didn't tell me we were dealing with THE SUPERNATURAL!"

The whole premise of the Canister reminds me of my job - I once told everyone, "No, I DON'T have that file!  Please stop asking me!"  Guess who found it buried deep down a few weeks later?  

And:  "Is it money?  We can pay more money!"

Edited by Mrs. Hanson
ByTor

ByTor

22 hours ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

Per The Canister:  "You didn't tell me we were dealing with THE SUPERNATURAL!"

Also from The Canister (which I LOVE)...

Raymond (wearing winter jacket): "I'm not sick. I just think that this is a bitchin' jacket."

Marie: "That's not Easter language."

Also, Debra trying to distract Marie so Ray could replace the canister: "Marie, I am a terrible cook! I really want you to look at these potatoes. I didn't know what the hell I was doing!"

Mrs. Hanson

Mrs. Hanson

(edited)

And I say "I am really TISSED!" all the time, along with "Tur Hats!" cause I am weird that way.

On 1/25/2018 at 2:18 PM, ShadowSixx said:

Debra: Their marriage was like a rock. The one solid rock for me.

Ray: Well maybe it was like a stone, and now it has passed.

HAHAHAHA!  love it!

 

Also: "I want a sister!!!  Not a sister sister!"  I also use the "pray for me" a lot.

Edited by Mrs. Hanson
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