S09.E19: Side Dishes Side Pieces

[SuburbanHangSuite]

18 hours ago, balisticnikki said:

Then I just can't figure out why she got with him. She knew he was racketeer and felon. And I'm sure she suspected he might continue.

See, I just can't join the chorus of people who slam her for getting with him.  I'll concede that it's unorthodox for an atty to get involved with a felon but I kinda suspect she may have just been out for a little sumthin' sumthin' and an unplanned pregnancy contributed to her decision.  But I do believe that felons are deserving of 2nd chances and may go on to live really productive lives (I see you, Mike Vick!). Phaedra just gambled on the wrong pony.

[RealReality]

I don't even know that phaedra loved Apollo.  I think he was a good looking guy she normally couldn't pull and he was willing to sleep with her because he was fresh out of jail.  

She got pregnant (either by accident or on purpose) and figured he was someone she could control and potentially an easy fall guy.  

And it's not a bad plan per se.  Apollo is stupid so he should have been easy to control.  And as an ex felon it's easy to blame him for everything.  

But, as Phaedra is wont to do, she took it too far.  If she had just been reasonable with the divorce and not tried to be shady and dodge serving Apollo he probably wouldn't be publicly talking to Peter and Todd and telling every one she is lying.  If she had just paid Todd the money she owed him, kandi would still be keeping her secrets.  But Phaedra is, as Charlie Murphy said, a habitual line stepper.

I don't even know that the extra marital affairs deeply affected her, because I suspect he has been cheating for years.  And the one person she got the most upset with was Kenya, who never slept with Apollo. So I think it's the public image aspect that upsets her the most.  Not that he actually stepped out on her.

[Aging Goth]

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I don't even know that phaedra loved Apollo.

The thing is, for him to hurt her, she had to love him and he had to know that he could use that love to hurt her.  He has gone out of his way to hurt her because he believed she loved him so much that he could do no wrong in her eyes.  God knows she defended him to the hilt until those final days before he went to jail.  That was and still is the problem.  She actually loves him. Hence why he can still use his side chick to hurt her.  Why She can never forgive Kenya for her part in the breakup of her marriage.

[Jamie Satyr]

25 minutes ago, Aging Goth said:

The thing is, for him to hurt her, she had to love him and he had to know that he could use that love to hurt her.  He has gone out of his way to hurt her because he believed she loved him so much that he could do no wrong in her eyes.  God knows she defended him to the hilt until those final days before he went to jail.  That was and still is the problem.  She actually loves him. Hence why he can still use his side chick to hurt her.  Why She can never forgive Kenya for her part in the breakup of her marriage.

Like Kenya asked, "do you think Kenya had something to do with the break up" of their marriage? The guy was a criminal and con man; Phaedra knew this! I doubt she's little more than embarrassed! She thought to have all the control in that relationship and she got taken probably! That's why she lies so much trying to make her life look perfect! It's far from it IMO! The woman's vile and I have little to no sympathy for her! ;-(

[HunterHunted]

On 4/6/2017 at 7:20 AM, Aging Goth said:

And, yes.  For a Southern Bell type, the pregnancy out of wedlock was an embarrassment and had to be resolved.  The lie about the due date is just a standard in these cases.  Or they use the other lie where they go the country; have the baby; and their mother comes back with their new "sister/brother" that they seem to take a lot of care for.

I think every one of the women got that. Whether they appreciated Phaedra's efforts to cover up her date of conception is another thing. My issue with Phaedra is that she's so often sloppy and imprecise with her language. She doesn't want people to know that she got pregnant before marriage, so she could tell people the month or the season when the baby is generally due. Instead Phaedra told everyone the precise due date and insisted that they were inducing because the baby was miraculously full term at 6 months. Rather than giving the precise due date, she could have said the baby was due in early summer.

Given that she's an attorney, Phaedra had a built in excuse for why she kept her funds separate from Apollo. I've always believed that hearing how much Apollo was blowing at the strip club was her warning flag. By all accounts, it sounded like he was blowing a decent person's salary at the club.

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Like Kenya asked, "do you think Kenya had something to do with the break up" of their marriage? The guy was a criminal and con man; Phaedra knew this! I doubt she's little more than embarrassed! She thought to have all the control in that relationship and she got taken probably! That's why she lies so much trying to make her life look perfect! It's far from it IMO! The woman's vile and I have little to no sympathy for her! ;-(

By the time she said this, Phaedra knew Apollo had never left his criminal past behind, blew tens of thousands of dollars at strip clubs and buying things for himself, had cheated on Phaedra, and lied about Kenya hitting on him, but Phaedra still ascribed some blame to Kenya. The dissolution of her marriage is primarily due to Apollo and a series of ambivalent to protectionist decisions that Phaedra makes in order to make her life seem perfect.

Edited April 10, 2017 by HunterHunted

[balisticnikki]

4 hours ago, Aging Goth said:

The thing is, for him to hurt her, she had to love him and he had to know that he could use that love to hurt her.  He has gone out of his way to hurt her because he believed she loved him so much that he could do no wrong in her eyes.  God knows she defended him to the hilt until those final days before he went to jail.  That was and still is the problem.  She actually loves him. Hence why he can still use his side chick to hurt her.  Why She can never forgive Kenya for her part in the breakup of her marriage.

See, I don't think the hurt is because of any real love for him. I think the hurt is just because of her pride. (And I think she is also scared and angry about being caught up/almost caught up in his criminal activity.) If anything, imo, she feels like she got played and embarrassed by a man who she should have had the upper hand with. She knew he was dumb and rough and physically out of her league...there's only so much real love you can have for a man like that.

She's mad at Kenya too out of embarrassment. All of the flirting and innuendo between them would be embarrassing to any woman. She knows Kenya could have had her husband at any time. And the fact that Kenya didn't want him, makes it even worse!

(agreeing w/ the two posters above me.)

But during their marriage, did Apollo have (or pretend to have) any kind of legitimate job? Was he a personal trainer or something? Where did Phaedra think he was getting his money? Even if she wasn't aware of what was going on at the strip clubs, wasn't he buying cars and motorcycles and traveling, etc.?

Edited April 7, 2017 by balisticnikki

[Jamie Satyr]

1 minute ago, balisticnikki said:

See, I don't think the hurt is because of any real love for him. I think the hurt is just because of her pride. (And I think she is also scared and angry about being caught up/almost caught up in his criminal activity.) If anything, imo, she feels like she got played and embarrassed by a man who she should have had the upper hand with. She knew he was dumb and rough and physically out of her league...there's only so much real love you can have for a man like that.

She's mad at Kenya too out of embarrassment. All of the flirting and innuendo between them would be embarrassing to any woman. She knows Kenya could have had her husband at any time. And the fact that Kenya didn't want him, makes it even worse!

But during their marriage, did Apollo have (or pretend to have) any kind of legitimate job? Was he a personal trainer or something? Where did Phaedra think he was getting his money? Even if she wasn't aware of what was going on at the strip clubs, wasn't he buying cars and motorcycles and traveling, etc.?

If she wasn't aware of what Apollo was doing, she'd have to be a blithering idiot! Phaedra's not the sharpest knife in the drawer, but no way was she blind to nefarious schemes her shady husband was doing to supplement his allowance from her! Remember she was the one who used that comment concerning Todd and Kandi! I wonder how she likes it coming back; in spades since he's in jail and Todd's still right under her nose? ;-)

[RealReality]

6 hours ago, Aging Goth said:

The thing is, for him to hurt her, she had to love him and he had to know that he could use that love to hurt her.  He has gone out of his way to hurt her because he believed she loved him so much that he could do no wrong in her eyes.  God knows she defended him to the hilt until those final days before he went to jail.  That was and still is the problem.  She actually loves him. Hence why he can still use his side chick to hurt her.  Why She can never forgive Kenya for her part in the breakup of her marriage.

Not true.  You don't have to love someone for them to hurt something you do love.  Phaedra loves her image, she has lied for it, sacrificed for it, and made it a top priority.  Apollo hurt THAT, and thats the problem.  

I don't think she went out of her way to defend him because she loved him, but because she wanted to protect her image.  And Apollo was an extension of her image.

The side chick digs into the "perfect marriage" narrative she was selling at the time.

LOL, she never forgave Kenya because Kenya REALLY messed with her image by getting Apollo to admit he is a liar on national TV.

And this was after liar Phaedra swore up one side and down the other that she "saw" a text message from Kenya to Apollo offering him a BJ.  Another lie, Kenya had to be sacrificed at the alter of Phaedra's image.  Because Phaedra couldn't admit that Kenya wasn't after her husband, so she made up some fake text message.  And Kenya got Apollo to admit on national TV that it was all a lie.  

Its telling that Apollo had side chicks over the years and yet the only one Phaedra wanted to talk about was the one woman that had zero interest in being with Apollo.  Which tells me that the side chicks aren't particularly important, but her image is.  Which is why she went through such pains to lie to prove that Kenya was somehow bitter because she was propositioning Apollo.

[Iguessnot]

Phaedra's due date fibs didn't bother me because she always told them with a smirk and vagueness.  Phaedra kept sticking to her story but she never seemed really upset about the inquiries from what I remember. When Phaedra's doctor contradicted her fairytale, it continued to be a great open joke. I just don't see how the situation warranted more than a giggle. 

If Apollo had side chicks, it wasn't apparent on the show. What was apparent was Kenya insistence on interacting with Apollo any damn way she pleased even against the protests of the wife. Phaedra told Kenya that she wasn't the cause of the divorce, but she was rightly pissed off at her actions. 

Phaedra's crafted image is important to her.  A stable marriage was important to her, but I didn't see her promoting a perfect marriage narrative; none of the ladies have. Maybe Porsha did, but that would be because the women pushed so hard for her lap up the strip club scene. Now that she had embraced a THOTness like no other, I hope these ladies are happy.  

[RealReality]

3 hours ago, Iguessnot said:

Phaedra's due date fibs didn't bother me because she always told them with a smirk and vagueness.  Phaedra kept sticking to her story but she never seemed really upset about the inquiries from what I remember. When Phaedra's doctor contradicted her fairytale, it continued to be a great open joke. I just don't see how the situation warranted more than a giggle. 

If Apollo had side chicks, it wasn't apparent on the show. What was apparent was Kenya insistence on interacting with Apollo any damn way she pleased even against the protests of the wife. Phaedra told Kenya that she wasn't the cause of the divorce, but she was rightly pissed off at her actions. 

Phaedra's crafted image is important to her.  A stable marriage was important to her, but I didn't see her promoting a perfect marriage narrative; none of the ladies have. Maybe Porsha did, but that would be because the women pushed so hard for her lap up the strip club scene. Now that she had embraced a THOTness like no other, I hope these ladies are happy.  

With the strange photo shoots and her insistence that her marriage was great?  I think moreso than anyone Phaedra crafted that image and it was important to her.

Your point about Phaedra re: Kenya is exactly the point.  As long as the world didn't know about Apollo having affairs Phaedra didn't care.  I get that women are blind to their men or whatever, but Apollo is not 1/12 as smart as Phaedra so I doubt he hid his affairs very well.  But she didn't get mad at him or the women in his life.  She chose to get mad at the person who, in her mind, brought down the image of her great and stable marriage....publicly.  Even though Kenya never slept with him or propositioned him.  I remember the Mexico trip and how livid Phaedra was that Kenya was talking to Apollo, even though he was in a crowded bar, full of people , including other cast members, and was being filmed. 

At the time I thought it was strange that she was so mad, because there was nothing they could do in the middle of a crowded bar with a camera filming them and like three cast members and crew looking at them in the middle of a vacation in Mexico.  But I took a step back and realized that this was after Phaedra lied about seeing some text message and was spreading lies all over about Kenya propositioning her husband to save her own reputation, and that Phaedra knew that Apollo could easily let it slip that he lied.  Which he pretty much did......on national TV....blowing Phaedra's attempt to paint Kenya as a whore and jezebel who was offering her poor, innocent husband blow jobs.  So, she wasn't mad at Kenya talking to Apollo because she was worried about her marriage, she just didn't want the truth getting out.  Because that is how much her image matters to her.

Phaedra's due date is just an example of her being a liar, and not a very good one if she got caught in a due date lie.  Phaedra is smart....very smart, her problem is that she seems to assume everyone else is as stupid as Apollo.  I also just have an issue with people who, went caught in a very obvious lie, won't just tell the truth.  Like when Cynthia had Phaedra on tape talking shit about her, and Phaedra just sort of stared into her salad and talked about a bug bite. She is just never accountable for anything, and she is constantly trying to slither out of any responsibility.

A woman Porsha's age shouldn't be so weak minded that she lets others dictate who she is.  Although if she is suggestible, maybe the women should tell her to stop being a liar with violent tendencies and she'll quit.

[Iguessnot]

We have very different perceptions, because I saw Phaedra mad at Apollo plenty of times. The things she said to him and in her talking heads made it clear. I know it's just me, but when the subject of the texts and the possible hook up of Apollo and Kenya came up, I was completely neutral. Because even if Phaedra is a liar, Apollo and Kenya are equally so. As with most off camera stuff, I just note it down and wait for further evidence. Like this ex con accusing Phaedra of all sorts of stuff. Good story but notify me when you have documented proof. In any case Phaedra's fight with Kenya was separate from the real issues she had with Apollo. Kenya will probably spin it as messing with Apollo to teach Phaedra something. 

Edited April 8, 2017 by Iguessnot

[wanderingstar]

Finally caught up on this episode, and I have one question: why did Todd introduce Apollo's new girlfriend as Mrs. Nida?

[byrd]

On 4/2/2017 at 9:26 PM, WireWrap said:

Kandi had to be wondering about all the time Todd spent with Apollo and what they were really up to!

The only HW not giving side eye was Kenya, who moved closer to the gf so she could get the dirt, her eyes were glistening with excitement/pleasure.

That girlfriend just seems really dumb and thirsty! 

[byrd]

On 4/7/2017 at 6:29 PM, RealReality said:

Not true.  You don't have to love someone for them to hurt something you do love.  Phaedra loves her image, she has lied for it, sacrificed for it, and made it a top priority.  Apollo hurt THAT, and thats the problem.  

I don't think she went out of her way to defend him because she loved him, but because she wanted to protect her image.  And Apollo was an extension of her image.

The side chick digs into the "perfect marriage" narrative she was selling at the time.

LOL, she never forgave Kenya because Kenya REALLY messed with her image by getting Apollo to admit he is a liar on national TV.

And this was after liar Phaedra swore up one side and down the other that she "saw" a text message from Kenya to Apollo offering him a BJ.  Another lie, Kenya had to be sacrificed at the alter of Phaedra's image.  Because Phaedra couldn't admit that Kenya wasn't after her husband, so she made up some fake text message.  And Kenya got Apollo to admit on national TV that it was all a lie.  

Its telling that Apollo had side chicks over the years and yet the only one Phaedra wanted to talk about was the one woman that had zero interest in being with Apollo.  Which tells me that the side chicks aren't particularly important, but her image is.  Which is why she went through such pains to lie to prove that Kenya was somehow bitter because she was propositioning Apollo.

Perfect ! However Kenya was inappropriate  with Apolla many times especially in Phaedra presence which for me would have been enough. 

Edited April 9, 2017 by byrd

[wanderingstar]

Forgot to add: I am still bored by everything having to do with the OLG restaurant opening. Nothing about it is appealing to me. But Kandi side-eyeing Todd's ability to get things ready for the opening was amusing.

[Jamie Satyr]

1 minute ago, Gillian Rosh said:

Forgot to add: I am still bored by everything having to do with the OLG restaurant opening. Nothing about it is appealing to me. But Kandi side-eyeing Todd's ability to get things ready for the opening was amusing.

Like they really need to be immersed in the mess of a restaurant? Silly and stupid; most fail the first year! Does Kandi think her celebrity will be enough? That's some ego if you ask me! ;-)

[RealReality]

28 minutes ago, Jamie Satyr said:

Like they really need to be immersed in the mess of a restaurant? Silly and stupid; most fail the first year! Does Kandi think her celebrity will be enough? That's some ego if you ask me! ;-)

I'm uncertain about this as well.  I wouldn't eat there but maybe people in Atlanta will go there so they can rub elbows with kandis coven of aunts.

[byrd]

On ‎4‎/‎9‎/‎2017 at 11:26 AM, Jamie Satyr said:

Like they really need to be immersed in the mess of a restaurant? Silly and stupid; most fail the first year! Does Kandi think her celebrity will be enough? That's some ego if you ask me! ;-)

Honey, that's just a opening for another storyline because if  Aunt Bertha, Momma Joyce and the other aunt are not paid on time all hell will break loose on Kandi and Todd !

[Jamie Satyr]

Just now, byrd said:

Honey, that's just a opening for another storyline because if  Aunt Bertha, Momma Joyce and the other aunt are not paid on time all hell will break loose on Kandi and Todd !

Well they better get ready to start b!tchin' because they aren't going to get even a free meal until Kandi breaks even! lol! ;-)

[byrd]

5 minutes ago, Jamie Satyr said:

Well they better get ready to start b!tchin' because they aren't going to get even a free meal until Kandi breaks even! lol! ;-)

I am willing to gamble that Kandi has some fund put away to appease them until the restaurant starts to show a profit, otherwise they will drive her crazy..,

[Ubiquitous]

On ‎4‎/‎9‎/‎2017 at 0:26 PM, Jamie Satyr said:

Like they really need to be immersed in the mess of a restaurant? Silly and stupid; most fail the first year! Does Kandi think her celebrity will be enough? That's some ego if you ask me! ;-)

I wonder if her aunts saw dollar signs in their eyes and got greedy or Kandi failed to mention that most restaurants fail?