S01.E05: The Game Plan

[Tiger]

5 hours ago, mojoween said:

I've seen it mentioned that Kate saying she watched the Steelers with her dad in 2006 means he must have died in 2005, but why would that have to be?  Isn't it possible that they watched the game together, both alive, and because the Steelers won she kept watching with the urn after he died?  Unless I missed something she said that made it clear she was watching in 2006 with his ashes?

Ive watched the scene three times and IMHO the dialogue and how Metz played it leave it open to either interpretation.  

[theatremouse]

On 10/27/2016 at 11:19 AM, cardigirl said:

 As for pausing a live tv show?  Do. It. All. The. Time. But that is why I watch alone.  Because I like having the control.  Even if I'm DVRing a show, I'll pause it for 5 - 10 minutes so it's ahead of me and I can fast forward through commercials.  It's not for everyone, but lots of people do it, so it really isn't the crime of the century. 

What you're describing sounds mostly like pausing a TV show that is currently airing, which is not necessarily pausing live TV. Sports = live. Happening at the same time as airing. Other than SNL, or the news, or the recent NBC musicals, most TV shows are not live. That's the difference. Someone else mentioned being able to hear neighbors cheering when someone scores. That's a big factor of watching sports live. You pause for 10 seconds, you still know what happened. You record it and watch it later, do not look at the internet at all, even if it seems like a spot that shouldn't reveal anything, it might. 

I hated the Jack reveal about the sports because it undermines the bigger point that, even if she didn't have a more personal sensitive reason for wanting to be at home, in her apartment, to watch the game, it's a totally reasonable thing that if she watches sports, and cares about sports and wants to see it live, someone who doesn't care all that much about the sporting event is probably not going to be good company during it, unless their intention in watching is to become someone who does care. Which is otherwise exactly what the show showed.

I get it though. Toby, not really caring about the sports, and apparently having no friends or family who are major fans, apparently is unfamiliar with how a massive number of sports fans watch: attentively. Even his other friend who he invited over because he was purportedly a sports guy, clearly wasn't, or at least wasn't a football guy. People who don't find sports a big deal often have difficulty understanding why the people who do wouldn't want it paused or wouldn't want people talking or standing up or blocking the view. It makes sense. It's a common, real thing. But part of being a social human is understanding when someone else values something that you don't, and leaving them to it instead of trying to convince them it doesn't matter. And when someone pauses, and then doesn't understand why that would be bothersome, or insists it's not a big deal and to get over it, that's trying to convince that it doesn't matter. Kate shouldn't have given in being badgered to go watch, but it was smart of her to leave when she did. Urn or no urn, she realized, you know what, these dudes don't want to really watch and I do, so I'm going to go elsewhere so they can do what they want and I can do what I want. It was a logical choice. 

This is a bad analogy because I know some people do compare sports to church, and I'm not actually trying to do that, but it's sort of like how some people go to church every Sunday, and if you tried to make plans with them, they would decline because they go to church. Others who normally would go to church might be totally fine to skip one week to do something else every once in a while. Some maybe only go to church in the first place if they don't have other plans. None of those is bad or good or better than the other. It's just different people having different priorities and different levels of importance associated with doing a particular thing. It's inconsiderate of another person to not accept that we can have different priorities and that's OK. He gets to not care about watching sports, and she gets to care. And if he wants to chill with her when she does it, it's her rules because the thing is important to her and not to him. If they were doing something important to him, but neutral to her, it would be shitty of her to act like he should suddenly decrease his level of investment just because she's there. There shouldn't need to be a dead parent involved for him to get that. That's the problem.

[jeansheridan]

I know we've discussed Kevin awkward "joking".  I wish Hartley was able to be a bit more charming with his "joking" or more wink-wink like he was with Kate in the first episode.  Like clearly Randall picked up that he was offering the hotel room to them but I didn't get that at all.  But clearly that was what Kevin was doing.  The can you read "joke" dropped like a massive lead balloon too.  What a weird thing to say!  The old Wise Owl was funny/rude enough.  

Also, I appreciate Beth's bluntness with him.  She really seems not to enjoy him despite the girls' clearly adoring him.  Her annoyance feels absolutely genuine.  I mean really, who does just show up at your door without even a phone call?  Actually I guess he did call because Randall hung up on him, but still.

Also something I noticed last week when Miguel and Rebecca visited, Randell seemed hostile towards Miguel.  Borderline rude really.  Awkward like Kevin.  So basically Rebecca and Jack raised three socially awkward children.  Two overtly successful children obviously but all three suffer from being kind of odd.

What I do like about this show is that it makes me want to meet more of their family.  I want to meet Beth's no doubt awesome family.  I want to meet Miguel's family too (he hasn't had much to do but the actor playing Miguel is very alert in all of his scenes which I appreciate).  

And I will pile on to the Toby dislike too.  He's just too jokey and hearty and pushy for me to enjoy.  But given Kate has a jokey, hearty, socially awkward twin brother she adores, perhaps that's her jam.

[Guest]

I didn't interpret the scene about the hotel room as Kevin offering it to them.  I think that was the joke-- that Randall replied as if Kevin was but it never crossed Kevin's mind.  I think Kevin is supposed to be a lovable but awkward guy, poor with words at times but well-meaning.  I think Beth enjoys him fine but is also fine with setting boundaries for appropriate social behavior with him.  He's like a golden retriever puppy.  

[jeansheridan]

That is a reasonable interpretation too.  I probably wanted to give Kevin a bit more credit.  His obnoxious self absorption at the breakfast table kind of rankled so I wanted him to be a bit more self-aware and do something nice for them.  

Also because the show so desperately wanted a "cute" reveal of Jack's death, it avoided allowing Kevin to be more honest with the girls about his own father's death.  Clearly he's gone through at least one painful death and has a philosophy around that (I liked his avoidance of talking about heaven or afterlife).  But the character couldn't just use that as an example because Kate had to have her moment.

Older Kate is the weak link for me on this show.  She's too far from the central action and so far I've only enjoyed her in scenes with Kevin.  She only seems confident and competent when dealing with his business affairs like arranging for his hotel room (And this is a fair.  I'm more competent at work than in my home life because someone is paying me to be competent).  I want her to have more friends!  Where is her group?  Even loners/introverts her age have one or two friends.  Even if they're just work related friends.

I do like that her conflict with her boyfriend this week was more around her own family traditions and preferences (and his pushiness) than her weight concerns.   

[love2lovebadtv]

On 10/25/2016 at 11:34 PM, MsJamieDornan said:

Yes, me too ! They better not just brush over it.

I'm not sure what I thought of Kevin tonight. Sometimes they make him just too bumbling. He and William were great though.

Kind of rude of Randall to just ask Kevin when he's leaving. He was only there a few days.

Yea but he was uninvited, unexpected, and demanding. 

[love2lovebadtv]

On 10/26/2016 at 0:34 PM, ElectricBoogaloo said:

Re: Kevin's terrible jokes -  I think it's a combination of things. First, he gets jokier when he's in situations where he's less comfortable. He act normal around Kate, and I think that's because he knows he can be himself around her. But when you see him in situations where he's feeling insecure or unsure of himself, he starts making lame jokes.  I can sympathize with that because I know I've been in similar situations where the stupidest things came out of my mouth because I was nervous or feeling awkward (and of course the word vomit just made me feel even more awkward and nervous).  Yes, you would think that anyone who is even a little bit successful in Hollywood would know how to read a room, joke appropriately, and generally be less awkward, but you also have to remember that being in show business means you're often surrounded by yes men and people with ulterior motives so they aren't going to say, "Gawd, what is wrong with you? Chill the fuck out!" For the record, I thought his joke about giving the kids sambuca and ambien was funny!

I think Kevin's awkwardness, despite his Hollywood exposure, is kind of the point. He's out of place in his own life and that's why he wanted a change. It doesn't seem like he's had success before the show so I take it he's been drifting for some time,trying to find himself. He hasn't, really, but I think there's a lot of material in that process. 

[love2lovebadtv]

On 10/26/2016 at 3:25 PM, Winston9-DT3 said:

I'd say I must be made of stone but I tear up all the time, sometimes at commercials.  But never during this show.  

And then when Kate shows him the urn, instead of saying something comforting and understanding he blurts out an accusing, ridiculous, "What?!?  That's your DAD?!?!"  As if she has once again offended him in some awful manner.  

But a worse offense to me was Randall chastising Beth for not informing him immediately of... what, something with her medications possibly interacting?  And then in the next sentence revealing to her for the first time his plan for an early retirement for them both in Charleston.  

This is a revelation to me that people don't pause some TV.  I never, ever watch anything live.  I don't understand what difference it makes if I'm cheering for the TD 12 minutes after the stadium cheered?  Or 2 days, if I avoid spoilers?  

I've like Hartley all along.  He's great eye candy and his acting isn't bad.  I believed him as a gay man on Revenge and a doctor with a shoe fetish on Mistresses.  

Ugh, more bathroom sex.  Is it just me?  

I don't love that Rebecca went from not wanting any kids to choosing to adopt a third with twins, but it's more believable than all the bathroom sex I see on TV, to be honest.  

Mistresses...THAT'S where I know him from! It was bugging me. I kept seeing mention of his other work but I'm unfamiliar with those shows. Yet I knew I'd seen his face before.  Thank you ! 

And yes,  all that bathroom sex seems unreal to me as well. 

And the timeline is way too tight. Even a person who wants kids doesn't necessarily want three at once.  I feel like it's something Jack pushed a little too much. Even down to adopting an infant.  Of course that part of the story is unrealistic but I'll give them that.  It's not meant to to be a show about foster care and home visits and tracking down blood relatives for kinship fostering before declaring the kid a ward of the court, etc. And I'm OK with that. But the superbowl argument-bathroom-sex-triplets pregnancy is too much all at once for me. 

[femmefan1946]

I've been assuming -- given the date- that these were natural triplets. In some googling, I saw that before 1980 (and the spread of IVF) ,triplet births were one in 10,000. And our triplets were not identicals, although Kevin might have been. 

The scary thing is the rate of cerebral palsy in these children, which seems to be related to low birth weight.

Over 25%.

[Judi Sunshine]

This was such a beautiful recap and so perfectly put. I'm a Gen Xer and haven't been able to put into words anything about this show, because it makes me feel SO much all at once. Thank you for writing these <3

[St. Claire]

I'm binge-watching this show On Demand, and this was the first episode that really punched me in the gut. I am a child of the 70s and 80s, so the triplets are the age of some of my cousins and the kids I babysat; my own children are teenagers now. I grew up watching some sports with my parents, some not (hockey was a family thing, but I just kinda stayed out of my dad's way most of the time when the Skins game was on). Today? Don't even think of getting between me and the screen if I say I have plans to watch the Caps game, and don't try to speak to me while the puck is in play. I can multitask (which may include texting/IMing my sister or cousins about what just happened in the game), but don't interrupt for an anecdote that can wait for the TV time out. If one of my parents passed away and the urn was in my house, it would probably we wearing a red hat- could be Caps, could be Nats- during the playoffs or other important games.

What's really starting to get to me is the touches of my own humanity. My third child was not planned; he came after I thought I was done and I had gotten my career on track. I cried in frustration when I saw that blue line on the test, even though I knew it was going to be there. I love my son with all my heart, but finding out that my life was being bumped back five years and knowing that I had a millisecond to adjust was hard. All of that came flooding back with Beth's revelation about thinking she might be pregnant. Randall would have months to adjust to the idea if it came to fruition; Beth would have to change her eating habits and her exercise and her ability to pee Right.Damned.Now. When I had my son and I was wrestling with feeling old and tired and was trying not to be resentful of having a surprise pregnancy, my mom offhandedly told me that my brother was also unplanned- I'd suspected as much, since there's a five year gap between us, but it was the first time she'd said so outright. Being in my 40s means that my parents and my uncles will speak to me with a candor that never existed before about the lives we led during my childhood, and seeing Rebecca and Jack is a similar experience. Seeing my childhood life through the eyes of a parent of young children is...striking. I haven't yet had to navigate the death of a parent, I've only just faced the loss of a parent-in-law in the last six months, but I realize how much harder the family deaths are now that I'm a mom and am also old enough to so clearly see what I'm losing. Losing my first grandparent when I was in elementary school was sad;  losing my final grandparent (five years ago next month) was excruciating.

I'm choking myself up again. I dive back into episode six tonight, and plan to keep the tissues handy. 

[babyrambo]

”Is that how you’re gonna do it?” 

“…No.”

“Good.”

LMAO 

one of the best exchanges (and deliveries) in the entire show