S02.E04: Beyond The Tank Episode 204

[yeswedo]

 

The entrepreneurs behind Cousins Maine Lobster want to expand into a brick-and-mortar space; Daymond John mentors the young creator of Mo's Bows; the makers of the Bottle Breacher beer bottle opener struggle to fill orders.

 

[bilgistic]

Is everyone out playing in the snow?

This show. How is that derpy Bottle Breacher couple smart enough to have created this (and other new, related, soon to be offered!) product, but it didn't strike them to ask the engravers if they could engrave more than one bullet at a time? I smell a rat.

I kept thinking that this crap is going to be in junk drawers everywhere in a couple years. I'm not sure how this is a "company" and not a "product" that Kevin has invested in, as he is so fond of pointing out.

Also, I really want to trim that guy's mustache. It must get in his beer that he breaches.

The Cousins Maine Lobster segment was painfully scripted.

[phoenix780]

Should this show be marked as an infomercial?  

I agree that the lobster segment seemed scripted.  I was confused that their restaurant didn't appear to have tables, because it sounded like they were talking with Barbara about how many could sit- was that just on the patio?  I was also confused by that one interview with Barbara in bright red lipstick with a ton of makeup on her face.  She looked odd, and it was only like one scene.

 

The guy Kevin brought to the bottle opener people was a little stiff in his delivery and seemingly scripted, too, imho.  That whole segment actually was just...they were telling me to order because they make stuff faster now, and that I should order because they're good Americans (isn't Kevin Canadian?).  It was a commercial, imho, and I wasn't a big fan of it, but I don't really get their product.  I wonder if making so many at a time is increasing errors.  You still have to tie the engraving back to a box for shipment, right?  Harder to do with so many at a time.

 

Daymond is the smartest one because he's only using this to market himself.  He plays with bees.  He mentors children.  What a renaissance man!   

[bilgistic]

I was also confused by that one interview with Barbara in bright red lipstick with a ton of makeup on her face.  She looked odd, and it was only like one scene.

Yeah, that was weird. The next time she was shown in that same setting, the lipstick was toned down. She looked overall like maybe she'd been sick or something. Maybe it's just the "street clothes"? I don't know. She looked tired.

 

Conversely, Kevin looked bloated. Oy, those crocodile tears.

[Guatemama3641]

Boring episode. I feel like we've heard enough about the lobster guys in the million updates they've had on the regular show (much like Simple Sugars). This show better step it up, it was a snoozer.

[bilgistic]

And in the previews, Kevin and those damned Wicked Good Cupcakes.

Can we not see some other folks? How about the Tree-T-Pee (sp?) guy? Maybe some of the people not making 80 kerblillion a year, but still doing relatively well running a profitable business keeping jobs in their communities? Providing valuable services?

Granted, that's no personalized decomissioned-bullet beer bottle opener.

Edited January 23, 2016 by bilgistic

[Gregg247]

It seemed to me that the business Mo started at age 11 has kind of worn thin for him at age 13.  He didn't seem interested in the numbers or anything else beyond creating more fashion styles.  He's definitely turning into a typical teenager.  I really enjoyed Daymond taking him out to see his old neighborhood.  I think it was very effective and gave Mo a better look at the real world.  When Daymond told that story about getting pulled over by the cops with a gun in the car when he was a kid, he had 100% of Mo's attention!

 

I think Daymond's mentorship is going to be much more important than fashion and bowties to that young man.

[starri]

Yeah, that was weird. The next time she was shown in that same setting, the lipstick was toned down. She looked overall like maybe she'd been sick or something. Maybe it's just the "street clothes"? I don't know. She looked tired.

That top was absolutely the wrong color for her.

 

I guess if I say I dislike the Bottle Breachers couple, I'm a bad American.  So be it.

[bilgistic]

That kid is probably going to be a fashion mogul (you heard it here first) in no small part because he was fortunate enough to have the advice of Daymond. He's also fortunate to have his mother be as involved and loving as she is. She didn't seem to treat him like he's a special snowflake, but that he's worthwhile and has value to offer the world in and of himself (even though he's entering puberty).

I really like Daymond; with the bees and now Moe, I think he's edged out Robert as my favorite Shark. I don't doubt that he's as shrewd as Kevin supposedly is, but he seems to have heart and is genuine.

[bilgistic]

I guess if I say I dislike the Bottle Breachers couple, I'm a bad American. So be it.

I guess I am, too, because I just couldn't with them. Wifey didn't seem to have two spare brain cells to rub together, and hubby is a SEAL? A SEAL. Okey dokey.

I don't know. The whole thing was fishy to me. My theory is that some military friend with the idea (but no money) came to them because they had family money or something. They bankrolled it and the person behind the idea is the one coming up with the new products. Those two aren't doing it; they couldn't figure out they needed to ask if the engravers could step up production.

Oh, but they did have some "girls" answering customer service emails.

Edited January 23, 2016 by bilgistic

[starri]

Oh, but they did have some "girls" answering customer service emails.

That filled me with no small amount of rage.

 

That, and Kevin's weeping over the freedom bullets, or whatever he called them.

[marny]

I'm happy for them that they've managed to create a successful enough business, but the whole celebration of bullets just grosses me out.  I hate the notion of "a bullet shell to open your beer" as the epitome of America.

[starri]

I'm happy for them that they've managed to create a successful enough business, but the whole celebration of bullets just grosses me out.

Me too, so you can join me on the "Not a REAL American" bench.

[bilgistic]

I love that Kevin is peddling this all-American song-and-dance on this episode while on every other show, he tells everyone to send production to Kerblazockiztan to save money, and screw "made in America". He's such a horse's ass.

[anonymiss]

When Daymond told that story about getting pulled over by the cops with a gun in the car when he was a kid, he had 100% of Mo's attention!

 

I think Daymond's mentorship is going to be much more important than fashion and bowties to that young man.

Yes that appeared to have the biggest impression on him. I'm impressed when he mentions LL or Run DMC but I didn't think the kid knew who he was talking about.

[Kiss my mutt]

I remember when bottle breacher came out and looked them up on etsy. They had a waiting list they got so behind. A lot of similar products started popping up on the site and took some of their business away. I wonder if it was a patent violation.

[methadonna]

Me too, so you can join me on the "Not a REAL American" bench.

I'd like to join you, too, as the celebration of instruments and artifacts of war, killing, and violence offends and repulses me to a level that, I realize, may be OTT.

In fact, on my bench--or at least my section; you may not agree with all of it, and that's cool too--we also don't wear camo as "fashion," nor do we set off fireworks in order to "celebrate" how "pretty" bombing and blowing shit up can be. That stuff has disturbed me for a long, long time, but i really never thought I'd have to add, "And no weapons engraved with sweet affirmations as accessories, jewelry, or commemorative sex toys" to my list of things that make my mom say, "Ohmigod, [Methadonna], stop being such a killjoy and lighten up JUST a LITTLE; it's not so serious."

Which is exactly my problem with it; when items whose sole purpose are to maim or kill are reimagined as "harmless" or "cute" or "awesome" fashion or tchotchkes, or when displays meant to replicate "the Rockets' red glare"--not in solemn memorial or to serve to remind us of the IRONY of the HORROR that can look so beautiful from the right angle (and the reality of how much it doesn't from the wrong one, or, maybe, the real right one), and, " elsewhere" LEAVE (but, that's far away, so who cares, right? Like maybe even farther than the places where the Sharks send the products to be made in conditions we'd never accept or tolerate here in our bullet-breaching, camo-as-junior-dept.-fashion-wearing, bombs-bursting-in-air-as-theater-watching (happily paid for by those local taxes that, fuck no if you were to even suggest they went to, like, actual local theater or education or--don't even say it, ya damn commies!--theater or other arts IN the schools) good ol' USoA, until our sensory images of war are as removed from reality as our language for it, and shooting and blowing up people is just collateral damage, and now even seeing, heck, holding and touching and engraving with important milestones like "Norman and Dee's 60th Anniversary Celebration: 6/6/14" and "First beer shotgunned: 9/11/2023" what's used to do so, "just isn't that serious, gahd, lighten up." I dunno; it seems a bit lighter to me to hold the ability to obliterate human, and those who risk theirs, in the level of seriousness such power deserves, and to keep my entertainment and fashion and accessories in a separate sphere, where there's no confusing the two.

Addendum: dang, it's been more than twenty years since I first read Carol Cohn's work on language and war, a piece that was--ohmigod

Methadonna, lighten up!--absolutely life changing for me as an, admittedly, not-so-light 18-year-old sophomore. The very second-wave feminist ideology of it is more than a bit dated now, but I think that her main point wrt the power of metaphor still applies and makes it worth a read today ( and, I realize, greatly influenced my to;dr above, especially if one believes these objects can function as metaphor, too. And, given the damn bullet keychain's NAME, I have to believe that, not only do they, but perhaps her binary-gendered take on much of the military euphemisms isn't as dated as we might wish. Phallic little bottle BREACHER, indeed.

[starri]

When they came on the pitch in the first place, they took Kevin's offer over one from Daymond who mentioned wanting to make things like keychains.  I remember thinking that going with Kevin seemed slightly classier.

 

And then we got to the Bottle Breacher barbecue tools.

Edited January 24, 2016 by starri

[nutella fitzgerald]

important milestones like "Norman and Dee's 60th Anniversary Celebration: 6/6/14" and "First beer shotgunned: 9/11/2023"

Quoted for slow clapping.

[columbot]

 nor do we set off fireworks in order to "celebrate" how "pretty" bombing and blowing shit up can be. 

 

I don't think that's what fireworks are intended to be...

[nobodyyoucare]

 

but it didn't strike them to ask the engravers if they could engrave more than one bullet at a time?

Because usually engravers that do it by hand which is the most time consuming (some engraving projects take years for a single item and the item cost over a million dollars) only work on single items. Engraving is a dying art form. There are not that many engravers around.You can do laser engraving but it is not as good looking and once again the company that does the engraving only does one at a time usually.

Edited February 1, 2016 by nobodyyoucare

[bilgistic]

It was a computerized laser program that was etching the bullets; that was established early on in the segment. The engraving machine was the size of a desk. The fact that they were engraving only one bullet at a time was either the engravers pulling one over on the couple (likely), or they were too dumb to ask why the engravers couldn't do more volume (just as likely). Either way, Kevin had to point out to them that they could easily step up production.

[nobodyyoucare]

They were doing one round at a time due to a variety of factors. One was manually inserting the data each time when for the majority of names they could do presets. Another was the machine was set up to do one at a time and they had to contact the manufacturer if it was possible to set it up to do multiple.

 

Laser engraving usually for what ever item is still usually one at a time.  

[nobodyyoucare]

I'm happy for them that they've managed to create a successful enough business, but the whole celebration of bullets just grosses me out.  I hate the notion of "a bullet shell to open your beer" as the epitome of America.

Technically that is the casing. Also don't you know bullets are freedom seeds.

 

Also there are many other things that could epitome American culture. Take for example the shirt the Mandarin wore in Iron Man 3. It was hard to spot during the film but here it is.http://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/1009/6504/products/762-001-469-01.jpg?v=1446070859