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Small Talk: Ughngnggh! Ugghhnnn!


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March 8th is my anniversary.  It was on this day that I left Ireland for Canada.  I was not long out of college, living in a small town with agricultural-based industries that went toes-up before I was out of high school, and zero prospects of gainful employment.  My Dad and I took the train to Dublin and I flew, via Heathrow, to Toronto.  I was just staying for a year, taking that time to figure out what I wanted to do with my life.  That was 25 years ago today.  And I still haven't figured a thing out!  Some friends are taking me to dinner tonight and I did impose the 'have to be home by 9pm for The Walking Dead' rule but we shall see.  I had every intention of going back to Ireland, you know, but every choice I made along the way kept me here.  I had a return ticket that I never used, I renewed my work visa at the end of the first year, two years later I applied for permanent residency and in 1998 I became a Canadian citizen, none of which I anticipated when I stepped onto that first plane in Dublin with the confidence of a kid who has no idea what lies ahead!

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Pssh tosh, who eats half a cupcake? We eat 4 and we get frosting on our noses because there's an apocalypse a-comin! In the future we are eating spam cakes for our birthdays or raisin balls (shout out to anyone watching The Last Man on Earth).

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I spent all afternoon stuffing envelopes for a "sea life" conservation group, ie save the water, save the sea creatures, save the planet. So I laughed my ass off that the items to bid on are a dove hunt, a falconry hunting exhibition, a gator trapper, a quail hunt and even some fishing trips & a lobster dinner. So they're kinda like "screw the birds we are saving fishies, except the tasty ones". Which I know is not true and they're not PETA, they don't want them to never be killed but just their habitats healthy and controlled fishing so as not to wipe out a species or cruel and unusual practices. But I thought of Buttons.

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(edited)

Do you need your cupcake cut in half? Merle has a handy built-in knife.

 

How do you think he frosted them?

 

Happy Merle-day to you,

Happy Merle-day to you,

Happy Merle-day eatyourhalfcupcakeandgetoutofMerle'swayifyouknowwhatsgoodforyouooooooo,

Happy Merle-day to you!

Good protein in mashed lima beans w/cocoa powder and sweetener!! Mmm! Sounds delish. Let me just adjust my pretty cardigan and go requisition some limas.

 

It just don't taste right if it ain't got no acorns in it...

 

What I want to know is where Carol is hiding the fashion scarves. Oh, you know she's found a couple.  It would be just like her to wear one, jauntily knotted around her neck, ready to pull off in an instant and strangle someone with.

Edited by BrokenRemote
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Grrr... All of a sudden only the full desktop version of this site would load on my phone. Posts were all scrunched up one letter wide and five hundred letters tall. Had to clear phone cache. Of course I Iost a long post in the process. I need to get out the soldering iron and finish fixing my darned laptop.

Scarves are not evil; scarves are neutral. They are simply amazingly versatile tools in the hands of whomever chooses to employ them.

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Wheeeee! I made an effort today! My hair, she is blownded, my face, she has the "base" and yes that's about as far as it goes. lip gloss. I stopped attempting mascara or eyeliner because of the dreaded raccoon face and my eyes just burn at the end of the day. I can do it in short bursts but not all day. I love that scraping the bottom of the barrel is an achievement for me. 

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Right there with you.  I read in a magazine that "a wash of pale purple on the eyelids" was in for spring.  After my friends' reactions to the red dress, I have vowed to make more of an effort so I went looking for a pale purple eye shadow.  I haven't worn eye makeup since my disaffected Goth-lite teens but I did find a nice lavender eye shadow and then I had to ask the nice lady at Clinique what exactly constituted a "wash" of eye shadow because I am that clueless.  I took it out of the box when I got home and that's as far as we've gone.  My work day doesn't really call for anything beyond personal hygiene and a ponytail. 

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At Christmas I got some make up so I did the full face thing trying to give myself a smokey eye. Ummm fail. The eyeshadow that came with my kit was all glitter. I looked like a drag queen. And I thought really young girls are stupid. Ha!

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Everybody is talking about how terrible Carol was to the kid, umm nobody wants me babysitting in the ZA. My mom used to watch this little boy and he drove me nuts. It was like getting a little brother. He would watch Wheel of Fortune with my mom and go point out the letters on the screen and lord help you if you were watching something else, he would march over to you and demand the remote, "TIME TO WATCH WHEEL". To this day I can't stand wheel on my tv. Anywho when he would get too jabbery for me I would play a game with him where I made him hold a little plastic tea saucer in his mouth. And every once in a while I would point him at the dryer and tell him I was gonna put him in there. (I never did) and I was a mean teenager, I probably would never do anything like that now...probably. ;)

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Is he the only man on the Island?  If so he will be manscaping, whether he likes it or not!

My girls would heartily applaud that notion.

  

(I never did) and I was a mean teenager, I probably would never do anything like that now...probably. ;)

Aw, c'mon - sure you would.

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Speaking of braiding, my sister-in-law has a lovely story about meeting the mother of a former boyfriend of hers.  Old school hippie type.  She didn't shave her pits, and would braid the hair there (I'm sure she had someone else do the braiding, as how could you ever do that one handed?).  My sister-in-law, being an ultra-conservative type, found her horrific/amusing.  Mom also told her she enjoyed sucking toes in the hot tub.

 

Hey Nashville - can we put barrettes in your chest hair at least?

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Wow! Wowee wow wow! How the hell her pit hair get that long? Not that I've tried but even at my laziest I don't have braidable. Is she also a "one holer"?

 

  She didn't shave her pits, and would braid the hair there (I'm sure she had someone else do the braiding, as how could you ever do that one handed?). 

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hahahaha I watch too much walking dead, I can snack while they eat Bob's leg etc. 

I watched Gareth and Martin eating Bob's leg and I'm looking at the clock:

Is Sonny's still open? How about the drive-thru window?

Even the dogs; I was watching Michonne and Maggie and Daryl and it really looked like nice thick pork tenderloin with a good sear, still juicy...

I'm a born two-holer, one-holer, call me anything but late for supper.

Don't get in a plane crash in the Andes with me.

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I watched Gareth and Martin eating Bob's leg and I'm looking at the clock:

Is Sonny's still open? How about the drive-thru window?

Even the dogs; I was watching Michonne and Maggie and Daryl and it really looked like nice thick pork tenderloin with a good sear, still juicy...

I'm a born two-holer, one-holer, call me anything but late for supper.

Don't get in a plane crash in the Andes with me.

 

Or try to cross the Sierra Nevadas on foot during winter with me.  Heh.

 

Do know about one or two holer with the woman.  SIL only told me about the hair and toe sucking.  Which was more than I needed to know.

 

Yeah, I can eat anything while watching TWD - I'm just that dead inside.  I chalk it up to years of watching the TMIcam on CSI.  Now howzabout passing me some of those ribs?

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How did she know about the toe sucking? Inquiring minds want to know. In my head she should NOT be trying to suck her son's toes, nor her daughter in law. 

 

My sister, when we were growing up used to try and sneak up on me and lick my fingernails. yes it is bizarre. She bit her nails down to nubs and liked that mine were long and smooth. Yes, it squicked me out beyond measure. 

 

It makes me not feel bad that we once agreed to drink our pee ( 3 years old people, 3 years old) and I backed out so she drank my pee :D I'M YOUNGER, IT'S TOTALLY FAIR! If she is stupider than me I can't help that. 

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It makes me not feel bad that we once agreed to drink our pee ( 3 years old people, 3 years old) and I backed out so she drank my pee :D I'M YOUNGER, IT'S TOTALLY FAIR! If she is stupider than me I can't help that. 

Made me think of the scene in ? Election, was it? When they eat asparagus and pee in plastic cups so they can smell it.

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She knew about the toe sucking because boyfriend's mom brought it up in conversation.  Don't you have conversations like that with your kids' boy and girl friends?  Heh.

 

I've read too many articles on people trapped by earthquakes who survived by drinking their own pee.  I know it's sterile and all that, but last resort, man.  Last resort.

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Speaking of pit hair: I'm all for the feminist rationale of "do what you want with your own body hair." But I hate pit hair. I always do my pits even if I skip my legs.

I also don't mind if men shave their pits. I hate those little deodorant "balls" that dangle off some men's pit hair. Icky. My SO doesn't have that issue with what he uses - luckily, cuz he'd never shave his pits.

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We shaved my boyfriend's pits once when he had drank a little too much....Unfortunately we had also drank a little to much and got part of his chest too...lol  He said he felt naked no matter how many clothes he put on :)

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I also always do the pits even if I skip the legs. And I can't believe anyone else ever thinks of clumps of deodorant sticking to pit hair. Good thing that won't be a problem in the ZA. We will stank!

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Proof that Rick is right and people are the real threat: a friend just found out his elderly father (recently released from hospital) has to go into a nursing home for ongoing care.  They'd always planned for this sort of contingency and now that the moment has arrived, the money set aside for such things?  Gone.  My friend's sibling has been dipping into the fund for years.  There were never any illnesses or longterm unemployment or similar hardships that might excuse such a breach of trust.  Come the ZA, I know who I'm tossing over the wall to distract the Walkers.  I'm no naïve who lives in a wonderful world populated by unicorns and rainbows but sometimes the extent of an individual's shadiness just rocks me. 

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Proof that Rick is right and people are the real threat: a friend just found out his elderly father (recently released from hospital) has to go into a nursing home for ongoing care.  They'd always planned for this sort of contingency and now that the moment has arrived, the money set aside for such things?  Gone.  My friend's sibling has been dipping into the fund for years.  There were never any illnesses or longterm unemployment or similar hardships that might excuse such a breach of trust.  Come the ZA, I know who I'm tossing over the wall to distract the Walkers.  I'm no naïve who lives in a wonderful world populated by unicorns and rainbows but sometimes the extent of an individual's shadiness just rocks me. 

 

Time to call the police.

 

Elder Financial Abuse:        http://www.preventelderabuse.org/elderabuse/fin_abuse.html

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Yes, they should call the police, but they'll be lucky if they ever see the money again.  Then the sibling goes to jail, upsetting the father when he's already in bad shape (I don't know this family, but this is what I've seen before.)  It just sucks all around. 

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People really suck at times like that. And even worse when it's family. That is truly heinous. Friend of mine, his grandpa has some kind of dementia, his father is the power of attorney, he's going to buy a house to live in with granpa and take care of him for whatever time he's got left. Dad's sister thinks she should be in charge so she sends an email to the entire family describing what a piss poor job she thinks her brother is doing. Granpa had a dog, he couldn't care for it so he gave it to the daughter/sister, he believed to be looked after, she put the dog down!!!!!! It wasn't a young dog but also not old, not a behavioral issue, apparently the dog was ugly but seriously, wtf is wrong with sister? Sadly, he truly will not remember the dog so it's not like she will suffer the consequences but holy crap that's a cold bitch. There is actually a provision in the will that anything grandpa has left will be split evenly amongst the siblings and if anyone argues they get $1, she still thinks she's gonna sue! For what? Both men, dad and granpa are preachers, they aren't made of money. I hope she does and loses and has to pay court costs for both. 

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Troubles and illness/death bring out either the best or the worst in people.  None of this surprises me, unfortunately.  I have seen much, much worse.  But I've also seen almost saintly acts by family members.  I guess it all evens out in the end, spread out over the world.

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Currently eating spaghetti (from Noodles & Co.). Came over here to post that I thought to myself: "Do I look as awkward as Daryl right now?"

 

And that sucks, IrishMaple. Many of us seem to have people like that in our families, though.

Edited by Disraeli Ears
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