S05.E01: TBD

[judylo]

Ick!!

[Auntie Anxiety]

For any newbies out there, it is God who wants Garrick to have another wife. It’s a reflection of Jesus, dontcha know.

[Pepper Mostly]

Oh yay, the Merrifields! Dumb and Dumber. 

Danielle. You have NOT been practicing polygamy.

Oh god, Garrick is yapping about sperm and I may NEVER stop heaving. 

[Auntie Anxiety]

Danielllllle can’t believe Garrick’s tripe. yet she is still sitting there.

[CSunshine76]

Nope Garrick. NOPE NOPE NOPE.

Holy shit man.

[judylo]

What the what??

[sainte-chapelle]

Lol what the fuck is going on here?!?!

[Auntie Anxiety]

The Brazilian Bombshell makes a cameo appearance.

[tvrox]

These people think polygamy ok in the bible? Granted it's been a while since I've been in church, but I must have missed that part. 

[Pepper Mostly]

Just now, CSunshine76 said:

Nope Garrick. NOPE NOPE NOPE.

Holy shit man.

Here, breathe into this paper bag. Slow and steady. Put your head between your knees. You'll be OK.

Just now, sainte-chapelle said:

Lol what the fuck is going on here?!?!

Wait till he starts crying!

[Auntie Anxiety]

And the Oscar goes to…….Danielllllle.

[tvrox]

She divorced her husband and then the 90 dayer didn't even come to the states to get the green card??? 

[Auntie Anxiety]

Garrick: I don’t think Roberta will be back in our lives. It will be like someone rising from the dead.

Me: Ummmmm, isn’t that your religion?

[Pepper Mostly]

The thing I don't get is why they all loved Roberta so much. She was deadly dull. 

[judylo]

Dannielle looks pretty good … oh no, another victim!

[Auntie Anxiety]

Is Garrick still rocking the high heels cowboy boots?

[Pepper Mostly]

Just now, tvrox said:

She divorced her husband and then the 90 dayer didn't even come to the states to get the green card??? 

Yup. So now she has no husband, no protection for herself or her kids once the new bride arrives on the scene. She's an IDIOT par excellence. 

[sainte-chapelle]

Just now, Pepper Mostly said:

The thing I don't get is why they all loved Roberta so much. She was deadly dull. 

I could smell the grift a mile away. Her plan was to push Dani out but when she realized they would be others she took their money and cut her losses.

[tvrox]

I know where East Strousberg is! It's not far from Intercourse (seriously, LOL). 

[Auntie Anxiety]

They don’t have sex during Ramadan? Did I hear that right?

[Pepper Mostly]

Just now, Auntie Anxiety said:

They don’t have sex during Ramadan? Did I hear that right?

You can have sex during Ramadan, just not from dawn to dusk. Once the sun goes down all bets are off. 

[sainte-chapelle]

3 minutes ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

Garrick: I don’t think Roberta will be back in our lives. It will be like someone rising from the dead.

Me: Ummmmm, isn’t that your religion?

I am Catholic but never learned about the sperm to the brain part

[CSunshine76]

1 minute ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

They don’t have sex during Ramadan? Did I hear that right?

I heard “fast,” but isn’t sex part of the fasting? 

Just now, sainte-chapelle said:

I am Catholic but never learned about the sperm to the brain part

Because Garrick just made that shit up!!

[sainte-chapelle]

Just now, Pepper Mostly said:

You can have sex during Ramadan, just not from dawn to dusk. Once the sun goes down all bets are off. 

Tell that to Mohammad (old 90 day reference)

[Pepper Mostly]

Oh, so hubby is a big old horndog who won't leave her alone. She's ready to spread the wealth a little. 

[tvrox]

Wow those outfits on new girl seem really Muslim appropriate... LOL. 

[Auntie Anxiety]

Keisha’s profile picture is her wearing a pleather bustier. That shouts a quality person.

1 minute ago, sainte-chapelle said:

Tell that to Mohammad (old 90 day reference)

You get me, @sainte-chapelle.

[Pepper Mostly]

3 minutes ago, CSunshine76 said:

I heard “fast,” but isn’t sex part of the fasting? 

They can't eat, drink, or have sex during the day. From sunrise to sunset. Once the sun goes down there's a big meal, think Christmas dinner, and they get down until sunrise if they want. 

Edited March 5, 2024 by Pepper Mostly

[sainte-chapelle]

4 minutes ago, tvrox said:

Wow those outfits on new girl seem really Muslim appropriate... LOL. 

The tattoos, most Muslims consider them haram (forbidden)

Edited March 5, 2024 by sainte-chapelle

[tvrox]

9 minutes ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

Garrick: I don’t think Roberta will be back in our lives. It will be like someone rising from the dead.

Me: Ummmmm, isn’t that your religion?

I'm DYING. 

If she's that pregnant, should she really be up on the counter? 

[Auntie Anxiety]

Shane thinks a sister wife is the mediator in a bad marriage. Okay.

[Pepper Mostly]

2 minutes ago, sainte-chapelle said:

The tattoos, most Muslims consider them haram (forbidden)

Hey, she doesn't have to be a strict Muslim! Just spiritual! And willing to sex up some married guy. 

[tvrox]

He's very interested in hearing about this... hmmm... 

[Pepper Mostly]

Shane is absolutely drooling at the thought of his wife and some strange having sexytime. 

[JayDub1987]

Yall see Danielle check that camera before she went into her…..whatever the hell that wailing was? Shew! Thought she was gonna talk about her sister wives, rocking chairs, a front porch, and grandkids next. 
 

Also, I came in late, and I’m bad with names anyway. The previous couple is basically a cuck who’s gonna move his wife’s new girlfriend in with them, right?

 

[Auntie Anxiety]

Shane can’t wait to see some girl on girl romance.

[Pepper Mostly]

Shane thinks he made his ex girlfriend gay. OOOOOOO-KAY. 

[tvrox]

The one big bed would be a BIG no no from me. 

[Pepper Mostly]

I wonder if any of Shane's colleagues at the bank or investment company or insurance brokerage or software outfit he works at are watching this. Hoo boy. 

[Auntie Anxiety]

Is Debbie wearing Assley’s bridal tiara around her neck in the talking head?

[sainte-chapelle]

2 minutes ago, Pepper Mostly said:

Shane thinks he made his ex girlfriend gay. OOOOOOO-KAY. 

Such a 90s high school attitude. I remember dudes saying «  oh we broke up now she is gay I totally turned her » like..no

1 minute ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

Is Debbie wearing Assley’s bridal tiara around her neck in the talking head?

Dead

[Auntie Anxiety]

Just now, tvrox said:

The one big bed would be a BIG no no from me. 

Me too. I like having the bed to myself. Don’t even allow the dog on it. And those sheets must be a bitch to launder.

[Pepper Mostly]

Just now, tvrox said:

The one big bed would be a BIG no no from me. 

This bunch is REALLY weird. The two original recipe wives are married to each other. They all sleep in the same bed. This is not polygamy, its polyamory, and everyone is sexing up everyone else. Yikes. The permutations. The possible combinations. My head is spinning. 

[Shelbie]

1 minute ago, tvrox said:

The one big bed would be a BIG no no from me. 

Never in a trillion years would I share a bed with that many people.

[Pepper Mostly]

1 minute ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

Me too. I like having the bed to myself. Don’t even allow the dog on it. And those sheets must be a bitch to launder.

Where would you even get sheets to fit it? They must cost the earth. 

[sainte-chapelle]

I love the secrets and Sandals ads where everyone is super fit. I went to a Sandals and brought tons of coverups etc because I was a bit shy and embarrassed…..day two here comes the muffin top  in a bikini eating my jerk chicken by the pool. 

Edited March 5, 2024 by sainte-chapelle

[tvrox]

3 minutes ago, Pepper Mostly said:

This bunch is REALLY weird. The two original recipe wives are married to each other. They all sleep in the same bed. This is not polygamy, its polyamory, and everyone is sexing up everyone else. Yikes. The permutations. The possible combinations. My head is spinning. 

Where does one buy a big bed like this? 

[Auntie Anxiety]

The ladies are doing a good job keeping Nick well-taken care of.

[tvrox]

So do the other two just say in bed and watch while sexy time? 

[Auntie Anxiety]

Boom Boom Room. Klassy.