Ugliest House In America - General Discussion

[CrazyInAlabama]

The Neptune home from a few seasons ago has been toned down a lot and it's for sale.   I bet making it look normal cost way more than $150,000. 

The Midwest homes from this season are really ugly. 

The Ohio house is horrible.  I hate to think what that rug looks like underneath.   I can't believe anyone bought that place.  No way $150k will fix it

The dome home with the brown bathroom, and toilet facing a mirror is awful, but the main bedroom with an ensuite kitchen is just weird.  Maybe the main was built as a separate suite with the separate entrance?  There are at least three kitchens.  Carpeted bathroom walls are disgusting.   I don't think this one is fixable for the reno budget either. 

Cincinnati house looks normal from the outside.  The fireplace/fountain former alligator pit is horrible.   The light switches are strange, and the downstairs bath is strange too.  Exposed wiring in the downstair tub area is a total safety hazard.  The other bathroom is huge, and hideous.  The daughter's bedroom is so bad, with another alligator tank, and so many skylights, I believe what they said about impossible to control the temperature in there.  This one might be fixable for $150k. 

Winner is the dome home.   

Pacific Northwest is next. 

Seattle-So many steps!  Poor Retta. Mirrors everywhere, walls, ceilings.  patios are all rotting. It's hard to walk without slamming into a mirror. Sharp corners everywhere. There are mirror palmtree murals everywhere. The office is totally mirrored, and dangerous as hell.  the various carpets in the same area are awful. Bathroom was mirrored, and is now usable, but the homeowners have a tiny mirror. They have to be careful, because the wall mirrors and murals are very sharp. 

Sultan, WA--House is an octogon, on 6.7 acres of land.  House is a maze inside.    The- rooms are pie shaped. Rock walls everywhere, with mirrors. The pole in the center of the library is mirrored, and holds the entire building up. The dining room light holds 64 light bulbs.  Main bedroom and bath have 1500 sq ft, 40 vanity lights in the bathroom. There are 14 rooms in the basement, including a bathroom with 4 steps up to the toilet, and a cat washing station. 

West Richland, WA-along the Yakima River.  House looks more like a bomb shelter than a house.   Since there was a plutonium reactor here, I wonder if that's connected to the bomb shelter look of the house?    Homeowner's right, everything looks like end of season clearance.  Wall texture inside is hazardout.   Main bedroom has two sinks facing each other, in a bathroom island,  and toilet, and a claw foot tub right in the bedroom on carpet.  Kitchen is big, so many patterns, and everything needs replacing.  Stairs downstairs are curving and strnage, with a bomb shelter in the basement, with a curtain, not a blast door, and a stage room.   Next is a carpeted wall sprial staircase, with hideous carpet, and fake stained glass. Stair treads are only 4" deep. 

Winner is Seattle, the mirror house.  

 

 

 

[chessiegal]

9 hours ago, CrazyInAlabama said:

and a cat washing station. 

Have these people ever tried to wash a cat? Although I've seen video, cats don't like water on them.

Thanks for the recap. I've seen the promos but not inclined to watch. It's hard to imagine how such bizarre homes came to be built.

[Mannahatta]

17 hours ago, chessiegal said:

Have these people ever tried to wash a cat? Although I've seen video, cats don't like water on them.

Fun fact: I once had a cat who absolutely loved water. He would jump up on the bathroom sink and purr in gratitude as I poured water over his little head. Such a weirdo. I miss him. However, it is true that most cats don't like water. Plus they're pretty good about keeping themselves clean, so the cat washing station was about as odd as the alligator pits.

I have to say that while I do enjoy this show, between the laughs there are some moments of absolute horror. It's like witnessing a perfect storm of bad architectural choices, ultra tacky interior design, and a complete disregard for safety. But at the same time you know that the previous owners were probably having the time of their lives as they manifested their "vision" - for lack of a better word. 

 

[MagicEyes]

I'm intensely envious of the octagon library! 

[CrazyInAlabama]

The Southwest houses are epic in their uglyness.   The Texas house need wallpaper ripped down everywhere, panel drywalled over, doors replaced, and the carpet needs to be nuked from space.  The bathroom with the wood bars needs to be gutted.  The kitchen is hideous, and barely usable.   

Sedalia Colorado-looks nice from the outside, but the homeowners are standing on the roof, it has foot high grass and weeds on it.   Very industrial looking.  Kitchen and stove don't work in the small bar kitchen, living room is strange, saltillo tiles, and smooth concrete, lots of sliced brick accents, the main kitchen is very rustic, with rope accents on the cabinest.  Main bedroom is purple, with more brick accents and a cowhide closet doors (not fake cowhide but real).   Ensuite is no door, and really strange, with a mountain outline shower door, and the bathroom sink is a metal wash tub, with barbed wire decor. 

Jefferson Colorado-at almost 10,000 ft.  House is stucco, two story, very plain outside.   Living room has 3" thick red shag carpet, Lots of ugly wallpaper.  Heather bought the house for the view.   Shag carpet everywhere, lots of wood panelling, bad tile in the bathrooms, ugly chandeliers, orange tile in kitchen on floor and backsplash is awful.   The counter dishwasher is sitting on top of a woodstove.   Bathoom is a mosaic of blue tiles, on every surface, the bathroom is a steam room with a tiled pipe.   Windows are a bizarre three panes.  Stairs have red shag carpet, with treads too narrow for adult feet, and no railing on the dangerous side.   Boys bedroom is a stage coach with three bunks in it, they'll soon outgrow it, closet is small and has three stairs in it.  The main bedroom is green shag carpet, and everything is green in the room.   The view is lovely, the house is horrible.   Good luck getting contractors to work at this altitude. 

Winner is: Texas wins.    That house could be done for $150,000 in my opinion. 

[jcbrown]

That barbed wire explosion house--one the the things the camera landed on and Rhetta complained about was the swag lamp with the "barbed wire" cord. But it was plugged into an outlet (albeit an outlet on the wall that was too high and stupid) and they could have just unplugged the hideous thing!

Our game is to watch these and figure out which one they can afford to redo. The Craftsman was the right choice this week, though I shudder to imagine what Alison Victoria and her shabby chic taste for s#&t might do to a Craftsman.