janestclair

Octopuses are my favorite cephalopod. They can open jars and solve puzzles and (maybe) recognize themselves in a mirror. They can also camouflage themselves amazingly well, changing not only their color but their texture as well. This ability is due to something called chromatophores, which are specialized, pigment-containing skin cells. They can also detach an arm and throw it at a would-be predator, and then grow it back. They have 3 hearts, and blue blood, and the majority of their nervous system is actually in their arms.

I've always used the mouse on the right hand side of the keyboard. Putting it on the left was never a thought that entered my mind until I recently saw another lefty doing it that way. I had a mouse epiphany...it was quite funny actually. It's turned out to be a benefit, because I can use the mouse and write stuff down at the same time if need be, like if I am grading papers and entering grades into my gradebook. Huge time saver. I use only one brand of pen to do crossword puzzles - Pentel Energel. Quick drying ink. No smears on the paper or my hand. I prefer purple. Awesome pens.

How about when the plastic clamshell package contains scissors? Now what? Am I supposed to use my teeth? Because if I had scissors with which to open the package, I would not have needed to buy the scissors in the first place. I wonder how many ER visits are the direct result of someone slicing themselves open to get into one of those infernal packages. Speaking of which, scissors can go die in a fire, because I am left handed. Left handed scissors blow, so I use right handed scissors upside down with my left hand. It is not an ideal solution, and I can't really cut things in a straight line. Nor can I draw a straight line with a ruler. Right there with you.

I love this. I am absolutely going to steal this and do it from now on. I never pay in a restaurant with credit for exactly that reason. Same thing at the gas pump. My credit card never leaves my hand. In fact, the only time I use credit is if I'm buying something online or I'm buying something expensive and don't have that amount of cash on hand.

The largest single living organism on earth is a humongous fungus somewhere out west. Oregon? The underground portion of the organism covers something like 9 or 10 square kilometers (over 2000 acres). A clonal grove of aspen trees might beat it by weight.

I had pretty bad acne as a teenager and still get acne, though not as bad, in my late 30s. These days I mostly only break out at certain times in my cycle, at least on my face. I now get acne on my back, which I never did before. Who started the lie that people grow out of it, so I can punch them? I have gray hairs - I should not also have pimples.

I have a peeve - those fucking scam calls that want you to change your energy supplier. I come back from a Target run and my mom (who has dementia) is on the phone with one of them with our gas bill in front of her. I have no idea what in hell she told them, but I looked up the number. Definite scam. So I called PSE&G and told them what happened, and according to them they can't do anything to flag the account to not change it. We have to wait for a letter saying it has been changed. What the actual fuck sense does that make? Meanwhile, she doesn't have enough of her wits about her to pay the bill, but she knows where we keep them? Guess who just moved all the bills?

I am a teacher, so not in IT, but our IT people are sexist as hell too. I had a problem with my LCD projector that I use during class. Teaching human anatomy it's a vital piece of technology for them to be able to SEE the structures I'm talking about. Well, it broke on the first day of school. They put a new bulb in, assuming that was the issue, but it broke again. I told the guy from IT that I thought it was the fan, because it was very noisy and would stop working after 15 minutes. So they take it away (clearly to do nothing on it) and it comes back with the same issue. Rinse and repeat until about April, at which point they finally gave me a new one, and put my old one in another (male) teacher's classroom. I told him to tell them it was the fan, and lo and behold, it got fixed. They listened when he told them it was the fan, but not when I did. Rage inducing.

What a bummer. Now we're going to be 2 weeks behind everyone else. Channel 21 and Channel 8 don't even show it. Why do NYC area PBS stations hate us?

Well, shit. Now I'll need to change my lesson plans. Although 1:1 is still pretty impressive. I wonder how I missed that article. This is what I love about biology. We're always changing/expanding what we know.

Fuck everything about that. Stay home from the shower and anyone who has issue with it can also go fuck themselves. Do something fun for yourself with the money you spent on her shower gift after you return it, too. I hate people.

90 percent of your cells are actually bacterial. Only 10 percent of the cells in your body are actually human cells. In terms of genetic material in your body, 99% is bacterial, and only 1% is human. Basically, you should never feel alone because you are the center of the universe for a large number of bacteria. Koalas are riddled with chlamydia. Platypuses sweat milk and are venomous.

I never put my purse down in a store. It stays on my arm, zipped closed. I see women walk away from their shopping carts with their purses just sitting there, asking to get robbed. At that point it's just a crime of opportunity. A coworker actually had her credit cards stolen from her bag at Panera recently. She had it on the back of her chair while she was eating, and only knew it had gotten stolen because one card company called and asked if she just spent $2000 in Staples. So now I keep my purse in my lap while I eat, too. I'm also leery of hanging it on the hook in the bathroom stall, but it's better than putting it on the disgusting floor, so it's just the lesser of two evils at that point.

Last summer, channel 13 had one episode on a Sunday too. Annoying.

I don't think I'm that great of a driver but I also can tell what other drivers are going to do before they do it, and it has saved my ass on more than one occasion. I'm good with merging and maintaining appropriate distances at speed, but I hate with a burning passion pulling out onto the highway from a full stop. I find it difficult to judge distances when other cars are moving that fast, especially at night. To compensate, I usually floor it when I pull out. I also suck at parallel parking, but I live in suburban NJ, so it's not much of an issue. I've never texted while driving, and I give people who I see doing it a wide berth on the road.

Not the Louisiana crunch cake, but you just reminded me of the Entenmann's blackout cake. Oh, how I loved that cake. It used to be available only at certain times of the year, and then it was gone permanently.

My sister has the same problem with electronics. Gave her my stereu, laptop, microwave, and a fan to go to college. All were in perfect working order. All were broken within a few months of her being in possession. She's on I don't know how many computers since then, while I've had 2.

I also worked in a grocery store at one time. We were 24 hours, but the various departments obviously were not. I had a nice lady on my line one night that wanted a personalized cake from the bakery, but the bakery was closed. So I asked the front end manager, and we were slow, so she told me to head back there and write on it for her. I pointed out that I'm a lefty and that my handwriting is atrocious and that she probably didn't want me writing on her cake, so I found someone else who had no line who would do it for her. So she left happy, and I didn't create a Cake Wreck. However, had she been nasty, I would've just told her the bakery was closed, and sorry, there's nothing we can do about it.

I still use two spaces after a period. It's how I learned. There's too much muscle memory from 20+ years of typing to change now. I also go back and forth on the Oxford comma. Sometimes I use one, sometimes I don't. I teach high school, and I can tell you that most of my kids can use the basics of Word and Power Point, but just the basics, as in, they know how to type and change the font. Anything even a little more advanced, they're lost. Excel is a mystery to them. I blew their minds when I showed them simple functions like sum and average. They have no idea how to graph with it, so I had to show them that too. I have no idea what, if anything, they learn in computer class these days. I didn't learn any of what I know in school, just figured it out on my own. They don't seem to have the capability to figure it out on their own. Either that, or they just flat out don't have the desire to learn. I'm not sure which.

I straight up hated Babylon and thought My Struggle I and II were pretty meh, but liked the Weremonster, Home Again and Founders Mutation. I'm glad they're doing this, but only because they ended on a freaking cliffhanger. They better not do that again though.

The guy was a dick for asking you to move. Plan better. An exception to that would actually be something like a concert where you have to stand, and lets say between purchasing tickets and the night of the event, you end up on crutches in a giant leg brace. Then I'll gladly move so you have a better view/place to put your crutches/whatever. That actually happened to my friend, and we didn't even have to ask. The people next to us offered to move. So that was nice. Speaking of concert tickets, I just paid an extra $99 to upgrade from 5th row to 1st row center, and now I have 2 extra seats to unload, but Ticketmaster won't let me sell them and I have no idea where else to put them up.

I admit to using "super" as a modifier...often. I think I picked it up from my students, along with, "Get your life together", but at least I haven't started calling things "lit". If I do, please shoot me.

The placard is not tied to the vehicle. It's tied to the person. That's why it's a removable hang tag, so you can use it in whatever car you're in, as either a passenger or a driver. You can also get a handicapped license plate that is obviously tied to the vehicle. Everyone with either a placard or a plate is also issued an ID that you may be asked for when using the space, although I've only been asked once in all my years of having the placard, and that was at a concert venue where the handicapped spaces were in the same lot as the VIP parking that cost extra. The most egregious handicap spot use I ever saw was at work. Some substitute teacher with a Mercedes SUV parked in TWO of the three handicapped spaces available on two separate occasions. I assume so no one would scratch her precious Mercedes. I wanted to call the cops, but I didn't, so I just settled for bitching loudly in the faculty cafeteria within her earshot about what kind of asshole would use 2/3 of the available spaces, and she never did it again. Why was that the most egregious? She actually had the tag, but that only entitles you to ONE space, and she should know better.

There are so many people in that category, and yet for some reason, most people think you can only be handicapped if you have a walker or wheelchair. My best friend and I are both in the invisible disability category, and I do get some looks when I park in the handicap spot that I have a tag for. Those people can fuck right off. Ditto the people who make a comment about parking in a handicap space when you're going to walk around in the mall. I can only manage so much walking in a day without being tired/in pain. I'd rather that be in the mall than the parking lot. My friend recently hurt her knee, and was actually glad for the crutches and brace, because for a change her disability wasn't so invisible. How screwed up is that?

I redid my kitchen (kind of, just refaced the cabinets) a few years back. I also like walls, and darker cabinets. Luckily no one tried to sway me to something I didn't like, because I would've shown them the door. I don't get the open concept thing at all. Why would I want to see what's in my kitchen when I'm sitting in my living room? So I can be reminded of the dishes I forgot to do? White cabinets are another solid no. I got a nice, warm cherry-ish color that really made the existing granite pop. I hated the granite counter tops before I changed the cabinet color from 90s blonde. Just like that blonde color dates a kitchen immediately to the 90s, white cabinets and grey counters will immediately place a kitchen in this decade 20 years from now.