Portae

This was like an episode of Three's Company: all misunderstandings and wacky hijinks. I am loathe to ever explain something away as a total misunderstanding, but I actually think that's exactly what happened here. It seems obvious to me from the way that Jax and Sandoval said "hanging out" that those two meant it as a euphemism for "hooking up." Sandoval's intonation in particular--he drops his voice and leans in a bit closer--makes it clear (again, to me, at least) that he meant making out/having sex. But James actually interpreted it literally, as just hanging out. In other words, I don't think that Sandoval and Jax are actively misrepresenting, if only because I fully believe that they asked him a question with a specific meaning and James answered in the affirmative.

Jax is a tool, but Brittney needs to not take relationship advice from the Vanderpump crew. They all justify cheating on their significant others with a variety of excuses, and Scheana's "she needs to see her options" is just another one of those. I personally think that Brittney needs to dump Jax, but if she's going to stay with him, then she has to (in my opinion) commit to towing the line in the relationship. She can't go out on blind dates with other dudes (couched as a group outing) because she chose to stay with her cheating man.

Yup. And Lala enjoys having someone who dotes on and pines for her (because I doubt that her man does it to the same degree), while not acknowledging what's motivating James's behavior, because that would force her to take some agency and end the friendship.

Candidates tend to drop out of races before the election if it is clear that they are not going to win. Campaigns are expensive and it's better for the individual to cut his/her losses and try to broker a deal with one of the people still in the running for a position in the new administration.

It's easy to "defend" your wife by hurling superficial insults at the cast member who already seems to be on the outs with the others. You know how Schwartz could really show his support for his wife? By not having sex with other women.

The whole leadup was James talking about moving Raquel into his place. He began, "I know you both love Raquel..." and Logan and Lala started to make faces at each other, essentially snarking on her. So then James calls Logan directly out on it, and asks if Logan has an issue with Raquel. Lala references the pasta incident, which seems to be that Raquel offered Logan and Lala a bite of her food, and they ate her entire meal. Lala's meaning in bringing this up was basically to say "you saw them bickering over the pasta thing, so why are you acting like you don't know that they don't like each other?" But then Lala tries to spin the incident as Raquel being ridiculous "over pasta," when it seems that Lala and Logan dislike her and enjoy treating her poorly (both during the pasta incident and at the table rolling their eyes about her when James is talking). I was actually annoyed that James apologized to Lala, because she knew exactly what she was doing in that moment.

Yes, Richardson isn't the best example of what I'm talking about. Tina, Tierney, and Faith were all either in the opening credits cast photo or introduced as cast members, but then largely disappeared in the final cut of the season.

I am increasingly curious about the exclusion of non-white servers on this show. On the first season, Tina was featured in the group photo in the opening credits, and production documents seem to suggest that she was initially meant to play a more central role (she largely just appeared as Scheana's friend). Another woman of color, Tierney, was featured in the opening cast photo in a subsequent season, but never even got a title card or any lines in any of the scenes in which she appeared (she is striking with amazing blonde curly hair so I always spotted her). Faith and Lala were cast together, but then it seems as if her storyline was largely cut in favor of showing her as Lala's buddy. And, to the point of RBonnie's quote above, Jen Bush has appeared since season 1, but never given a real storyline, either.

Schwartz doesn't have a drinking problem. Schwartz gets drunk so that he can use it as an excuse for his cheating. He likes to have a no-fault excuse to be an immature, unfaithful jerk.

Wasn't Faith a potential cast member at one point? I remember her being introduced the same season as Lala and seeing her in a lot of scenes. Makes you wonder how long the thing with her and Jax may have been going on.

Wait...so it's Jax's fault that Stassi and Patrick broke up? And he had to apologize? To his ex? About her ex? In front of his girlfriend? I really wanted Jac to refuse and walk away or for Brittney to check Stassi on her self-centeredness.

I paused the dvr to look at the text message that James sent to Lala, and I have a strong suspicion that he used a racial slur in referring to Lala's "ugly" ex that she hooked up with. The word is blurred out, which immediately made me suspicious. A quick google search reveals that the guy is Hayes Pullard, football player for the Jaguars.

Constructed for the show or not, I really like the friendship between Jax and Kristen. Unlike the other cast members, Jax and Kristen have gotten called on their shit the most often, so I feel like there's a lack of pretense between them that is oddly refreshing. They've done their dirt together, so their relationship seems based on...dare I say it? Honesty?

I thought that Joe was clearly kidding about letting the wind blow away the confetti. Both he and Melissa laughed after he said it, in a "that would be so bad!" kind of way, not as a stated plan of action.

Joe just seems so very broken. He seems like a man that could benefit from either counseling or a good talk with his priest. I wonder what will happen to him when he goes away for so long. He seems like he's barely holding it together as is, and that's at least with the privileges and responsibilities of everyday life surrounding him. It just feels like he will be completely lost to depression once he's behind bars. The one thing that I thought that the show captured well was the way that incarceration really impacts every aspect of the family's daily lives, from the big things to the small ones. I understand the sadness around missing your children's big milestones, but I imagine that the constant stress of having to cut conversations short would eventually take an even bigger toll.

Joe just seems so very broken. He seems like a man that could benefit from either counseling or a good talk with his priest. I wonder what will happen to him when he goes away for so long. He seems like he's barely holding it together as is, and that's at least with the privileges and responsibilities of everyday life surrounding him. It just feels like he will be completely lost to depression once he's behind bars. The one thing that I thought that the show captured well was the way that incarceration really impacts every aspect of the family's daily lives, from the big things to the small ones. I understand the sadness around missing your children's big milestones, but I imagine that the constant stress of having to cut conversations short would eventually take an even bigger toll.

The thing is, though, Jason Hoppy is/was Bethenny's 2nd husband, so I'm assuming that Ramona was referring to Peter Sussman. I assume that if Ramona wanted to throw shade at Bethenny's current situation she would have just said "Jason." I also imagine that Bethenny kept using the phrase "first husband" to make it clear that they were not referencing Jason.

I think that it's completely possible that Brooks is faking it, but to play devil's advocate, when you're sick, everyone that you encounter will want to suggest doctors and therapies to you. It can get exhausting. I remember when a close relative was in the last months of her life suffering from cancer, and a well-meaning family friend was trying to convince her to fly out to another state to visit a center that he had seen on a television commercial. When my relative politely declined, this friend stomped away muttering, "I guess she doesn't really want to get better." It never occurred to the relative that my relative was just exhausted from trying every possible treatment and was finally coming to grips with the inevitable. I'm not saying that this is what's going on with Brooks, but that I understand if he doesn't jump at Shannon's suggestion.

I think that Shannon is a bit shrewish, but I have to cut her some slack. David's affair wasn't just a one time thing. He had an ongoing relationship with this woman and made a decision to leave his wife and children to start a life with her. It would be enormously difficult for me not to constantly wonder whether our marriage was strong enough for him to stay, and if he was planning his exit strategy once again. I mean, he was telling Shannon that he was committed to making their marriage better at the same time that he was planning to move in with the mistress. There is something so incredibly horrible about that, and I understand why Shannon is still reeling. And, on a related note, this is why I have no problems with David apologizing to his daughters, or for one daughter telling him that she "can forgive, but never forget." The words may be her mother's, but I wouldn't discount the possibility that the kids suffered some real emotional pain when their father up and left them for nearly a month.

I wonder how much the whole "walking in together" is a reference to something related to production. I seem to recall Alex or Sonja explaining that the person who enters a room first is essentially entering the "scene" first, and that it creates the sense that that person/s is the "star" of the scene. I seem to remember Sonja being annoyed on a previous trip because Luann cut in front of her to enter a restaurant first.

Have we ever talked about Roman, the pitbull breeder who was dating Tammy's older daughter? His kennel's logo was a pretty well-known nazi/skinhead symbol, but I don't recall that being discussed in the context of the show.

Well, I guess it's been confirmed that the whole cast is Republican.

I like Heather, but she really irked me with the Sonja thing. I understand being annoyed at being made to wait (exacerbated by Sonja's refusal to acknowledge it), but I think that Heather was projecting a lot of her frustrations with the situation overall (including Bethenny's lateness) onto Sonja. Would it have been nice for Sonja to invite them into the house proper while they waited? Sure. That's what a friend should have done. But you know what else a friend does? Demonstrate some understanding and patience when a friend is dealing with something and isn't comfortable having people upstairs in her home. Whatever Sonja was dealing with, be it a childcare emergency, a messy house, etc., Heather could have afforded to be generous rather than following Sonja around calling her a bitch. Yes, I think that Sonja's excuse was bullshit, but I also understand that people sometimes need to cover for the real shit that they're dealing with and don't want publicized all over the place.

To be fair, Carole introduced Luann at Naeem's wife, Ranjana. Luann went over to look at her jewelry designs, and Naeem was there. According to Luann, the three of them had a good time together and the subject of borrowing a dress came up organically out of their conversation. Is it possible that Luann went over there with an agenda? Sure. But then it's just as possible that Carole knew about/had met Adam before and sought out an invitation to Luann's place to get her flirt on. I will be the first to say that I completely understood Carole's feelings about Luann possibly "using" Naeem and Ranjana, Carole's close friends, just to get something out of them. But that's precisely why I can't understand why Carole doesn't understand why Luann might be equally sensitive about, and protective of, the people in her close circle.

So let me get this straight. Two seasons ago, Carole was pissed because she felt that Luanne took advantage of their association in order to borrow a dress from Carole's fashion designer friend, Naeem Khan. But then Carole uses her friendship with Luanne (meeting her family, staying in her home, etc.) as an opportunity to scoop up a man, and can't understand why Luanne might be annoyed?