FormeryHeavyJ

Ummmm…..it's called a razor & shaving cream. Learn it. Live it. Love it.

LOLA!!! I was just playing that to warm up for tonight's show.

If he fell in the shower....would he actually hit the floor? Or would he just wedge himself against the walls.

Cakie is a term I came up with to describe the thick, cake-like cookies you see in the supermarkets sold in the plastic clamshell of about 14. They have dense, sugar-laden frosting & sprinkles on top. You can usually find them in seasonal holiday colors but they are sold year-round. My daughter hates that term so I make sure I use it as much as possible in front of her. Mmmmm….cakie goodness.....

I am waiting for this episode. My friends of snarking....this is a cakie. I have one every night with a cup of tea. Right now we have a package of yellow ones in the kitchen. Before that it was pink. With St. Patrick's Day coming up I'm sure that we will have a package of green ones (assuming the yellow ones are done). I eat so darn healthy but I must enjoy cakie goodness once per day. There is so much sugar in these things that if I eat more than one I will have to RUN to the gym, work out, and RUN home just to stop from bouncing off the walls. Cakies rule.

Every time Lola come on the show I have to grab my acoustic and start playing "Lola". Some people like her beauty, some like her wigs. I have the impulse to play "Lola". I play it well but I am asked to not sing. I could make Huskies howl a mile away. I wouldn't know a correct vocal key from a hole in the ground.

If anyone needed a good palette-cleansing from this year's parade of crybabies, whiners & b.s. artists...the perfect antidote was on this morning. I was getting ready for the gym and saw a an update show featuring Diane for a few years ago. This is someone who GETS IT. Someone to be admired. Someone who shows that a quitter never wins and a winner never quits. She had to get double knee replacement (as I say....from too many years of being stupid....and I speak from experience on that one) but never gave up. Many years ago I damaged my meniscus coaching basketball and then "got stupid" for too many years. I dropped the weight thanks to sleeve gastrectomy, work out like I am possessed, but still have osteo-arthritis in the right knee. All from being stupid for too long. Lesson learned. Don't be stupid.

There may have been but they could have been stuck in the folds. Or just dumped off with the kids by Mrs. Responsibility. Our standards have most definitely hit rock-bottom after all these episodes.....

This Hopie. She is missed. Never had a cat eat so much and be so thin.

If I had $100 for every time I heard her stay "stress"or "stressed" I could pay my mortgage for the next 6 munt.

Abandoning her kids.....again. AND SHE'S STRESSED AGAIN!!!!! And here come the phony tears.

That annoyed head roll is just pissing me off to no end. NO END!!!!

Oh for fucks sake enough with the dealing with stress. YOU DO NOTHING!!!! YOU SIT AROUND AND HAVE EVERYONE DO EVERYTHING FOR YOU. I so much want to plant my size 13 in her fat ass.

I know we set low standards but this one is wearing shoes and not Bigfoot slippers.

I wanted that for Christmas many years ago but it was sold out. I think it was around 1971.

New Balance....the official shoes for 600 pounders who dress like the sun.

Dress in workout clothes....bring walker. What a combo.

That guy with the soulmate in the Philipines has no neck. It bothers me.

He was seen sneaking away from the scale after messing with it.

Stress in her life? SHE DOES NOTHING. NOT A SINGLE THING. ZILCH. ZERO. ABSO-FREAKING-LUTELY NOTHING!!

Does she have another friend named Yesterday???? Oh I kill me. --Alf

Her name is Tomorrow???? You mean this isn't Who's on First....600 lbs version????

Between this one and Mumbles the Clown from last week....I am rapidly falling asleep.

If she succeeds....I am going to sit by the phone and wait for Ozzy to call me to ask if I'll play guitar for him when he tours.

Why does she walk like Harvey Weinstein with that walker?