jade.black

I was so very relieved and pleasantly surprised when we saw almost none of Tia and Colton for the first half of the episode, but then it all went downhill. I too am furious that they've made me side with Colton on something. What does Tia want, a goddamn pity rose?! He straight up told her he wanted to date around and made it very clear she is not the first choice she wants to be, and so she basically warns him that he may want to reconsider and tell her what she wants to hear if he wants to make it through the rose ceremony. Good on him for sticking to his convictions on that (but PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD NO to a Colton Bachelor season). I was pleased that Colton got a rose as an FU to Tia thinking he had no chance without her, and I was also/am also hoping (haven't watched the latest episode yet) that he up and leaves as an FU to the producers for bringing Becca back again (this is me hoping that they just wanted some quick and easy drama and hoped he'd stick around after, but if this is a Bach setup then dammit). Although, could someone not have given a rose to Wills? Seriously? Over David...? Stop the drama. I'm more excited for the arrival of crazy Jenna. Ok I had to pop in as a fellow lover of single malts to appreciate this post, especially because I spent a ton of time in the Fochabers/Elgin area of Speyside when I lived in Scotland... although I'm partial to Islay whiskies myself.

I definitely think Taystee made the wrong call during the riot and is mostly at fault for everything that happened to the prisoners afterwards. They had the chance for change and she shot it down to try to get justice against a man who was only marginally responsbile for Poussey's death. I always blamed Suzanne more for the death of Poussey and still haven't really forgiven the character for it. It bothers me that Taystee has overlooked Suzanne's part in that death and focuses on the guard who didn't realize what he was doing and was too distracted defending himself against Suzanne to notice he was crushing Poussey. When I said Piper's crimes were worse than Taystee's, I meant the original crime that got them thrown in jail, not anything that happened in prison since. They are both in on drug trafficking charges, but Piper's was more of a choice while Taystee didn't have many options outside of Vee if she wanted to avoid group homes. Piper had a decent life but was happy to go along living in luxury traveling with Alex, while Taystee was pretty much trying to survive. Past that, Piper has easily been involved in shadier things throughout her prison sentence (illicit panty business, getting caught up in prison politics/getting Stella sent to max, etc) than Taystee overall up until the riot. It would have been fair for T to be charged as one of the inciters of the riot, not for murder. I'll admit a lot of my feelings come down to the fact that Taystee is just a more relatable character with very human emotions while Piper elicits little sympathy from me. For what it's worth, I was still rooting for Piper's release in this episode, just wish that fate had been as kind to the others.

I'm not faulting Piper for her early release, and through the whole season I kept flashing back to the fact that Taystee did actually get out and then found a way to get back in because she didn't know what to do on the outside. The contrast just stood out to me when you had the fates of Blanca, Piper, and Taystee in back to back scenes. It's more the fact that Piper did get that lucky break when it's so unlikely that the same thing would have happened to the others. ETA: Piper herself in the show has said that she gets preferential treatment for the way she looks. I don't think it's just skin color, but also her socio-economic background (Badison also makes fun of her for using "big words" and someone, Alex?, points out that Piper represents opportunities a lot of the others never had). I get that there were a lot of moving parts involved in her release, and if Hopper hadn't been dealing drugs on the inside the early release probably never would have happened, but I also can't help but think the trial verdict would have been much more likely to go the other way if it had been Piper sitting there in court. But then, the investigative team probably would have never tried to pin it on her in the first place knowing that.

That was depressing in a wholly unexpected way. I was all tensed up expecting to watch one or multiple main characters die in this kickball game, and then even when they all end up being safe, I'm still crying at the end. I gasped when Blanca walked out to a customs and immigration van and poor Diablo was left waiting with flowers. How fucking horrible. Barb and Carol got a fitting end to their season arc, I enjoyed the storyline but it tied things up nicely. I was terrified for Nicky as well (my fave character since season 1) when she got roped into the game last minute, but then it's actually Lorna who has the crisis. From a realistic perspective, I couldn't see Taystee's trial going any other way, so although it was predictable, it was heartbreakingly true to life. Fig & Caputo have been a highlight of this season. Who would have thought. And then it ends with Piper, the blonde white girl whose crimes were worse than Taystee's and most others to start with, going free early (juxtaposed with Taystee being wrongly sentenced with murder), and the fittingly depressing final line of "What are you going to do now?" as the whole life you've known for the past few years and the love of your life are gone just like that. Man. Say what you will about the seasons as a whole, these writers know how to put together some heart rending finales.

Blake to Becca's sister: "I'm crazy. ...Crazy about Becca." There was a very noticeable and appropriate pause there. Ah poor guy! My friend and I both got on our phones to avoid emotional discomfort during that proposal rejection. Blake started sweating buckets as soon as he realized. Ugh. Yikes. Becca's family thinks Garrett would make a good father? What about their few hours long interaction that was completely removed from the presence of kids made them think that? Hm? Just, such a weird thing to say when you've never seen this person interact with small humans. Becca: "The dolphin jumping reminds me of a spiral macaroni and cheese noodle!" Deep thoughts, man. Also, "I would be happy dying here. With you." I imagined Garrett saying "Doable" and shoving her off the boat. Garrett: "I can hear children's laughter when I look at her!" I felt nauseous so many times listening to him prattle on about the romanticism of diapers. Also vomit-inducing was the amount of times Becca looked at Garrett with heart eyes telling him how much she reminded him of her father. Umm, if I was dating some guy who told me his love for me had a lot to do with me reminding him of his mother, I'd be out of their quicker than you could say Oedipal complex. My God was this episode boring. We talked through most of it and it still felt two hours too long.

He doesn't need the boost... he's more confident than everyone in the room.

What a great Men Tell All episode! Actually entertaining and reminded me why I originally thought Becca had some good guys in her group. I'd be ecstatically happy with Jason OR Wills as Bachelor. Jason wasn't campaigning any harder than any other contestants have in the past when in the running for the lead. He is intelligent and well-spoken and fun and he looked HOT in that blue suit. Also realized during the ice skating clip where he told Becca she had the cool hockey mom thing down and called her "Beckster" (which is so cute) that he reminds me a bit of Milo Ventimiglia (possibly because his on-screen wife in This is Us is named Rebecca and he calls her Bex). Actually think this MTA had the best fashions of any male after-show so far. Wills in his checkered suit, Connor with the patterned jacket and glasses, and Leo in the red suit. Digging the variety! Wills is just adorable and I love his subtle swagger- you can see moments in his montage where he is shimmying his shoulders or just doing various quietly confident sexy moves. Loved when the crowd cheered while his clip played where he told Chris his time with Becca was up, then Wills blew a kiss over to Chris from his seat and it was awesome. My actuary friend really likes Venmo John, surprise surprise, haha. I could just picture her getting turned on by that math analysis at the end. NO COLTON PLEASE. Ugh! They have all these good choices for next season and yet this man-child still seems to be in the running! He was such a dick during the after show. What did Jordan do to him aside from exist? Also, why do the guys seem to mentally block the fact that Becca GAVE HIM those golden underwear? Jordan was hilarious as usual and I was behind him 100%. He had some fantastic lines tonight. I haven't seen him be mean or petty towards any of the guys except for the ones who have attacked him first. He even initially threw a nice comment towards eliminated-on-night-one other model guy who then for no good reason jumped on the Jordan hate train. I also liked how Jordan turned around and pointed to the guys he liked and said hi to adorable Grocer Joe. GROCER JOEEEE! How happy I am to see you again! God, is he beautiful! That smile! The accent! Holy shit, he is just the cutest. I loved the montage of his time on the show and his whole shy little hot seat interview. Can't wait to see him in Paradise and I'm glad it seems from the previews

I was wishing they would instate the "no kissing" rule on more dates so that we could get an actual substantial conversation, but no, turns out then they just spend the whole time lamenting the fact that they can't kiss and touch and entirely ignore the beautiful surroundings they are now free to appreciate. Ha, I just kept thinking that Jason is so upset he got *this* close to banging Becca, and she sends him home on the night portion of the fantasy suite date! It was clear she was trying to dump him and he kept asking, like, "Don't you think we should explore all avenues?" and "I would just want to take every opportunity to see what's there" and it was so obvious he was thinking, come on, girl, let's just get it on this one time and then I'll head right home. And this after she raved about how fantastic his kissing skills were! Even her girlfriends told her to bring him to the fantasy suite! I did love Chiang Mai but kept thinking about how the whole month I spent around Thailand I was doused in Deet and hanging mosquito nets on every bed I slept in. I wondered for a moment what precautions the cast was taking against dengue fever and considered the romance of lighting mosquito coils under your dinner table. Focused on the fantasy, you know. Loved that tent that was on the last overnight date. Super romantic. Too bad it was wasted on the off-putting Garrett of few brain cells. Jason for next bachelor please!! I'm not overly attracted to him physically (although way more than I am to most of Becca's guys) but he has an outgoing personality and seems like a lot of fun. Definitely better than the alternatives.

I totally noticed this too and am so glad you pointed it out! The guy is finally elaborating on the sketchiest part of his history (that she knows of) and her eyes were glazed over until she abruptly saw an opening to change the topic back to herself. Garrett's sister reminded me of Maureen Ponderosa from Always Sunny. So glad Colton is gone. Not so glad he seems to be in the running for Bachelor. He looks like an overgrown child. That talk with CH was hilarious. As if he's contractually obligated to lose his virginity to Becca if he makes it to the fantasy suite. Although, I'm not any happier that Garrett and Blake are still in the running either. Becca just has terrible taste overall. Although, Jason I like. He's fun, and I'm into the Italian NY gangster vibe. I'd watch him as Bachelor, but I don't see that happening. At least Becca gets to test drive his other skills next week. Sorry I've dropped off the boards recently. I've been reading everyone else's insights but find myself too bored with this season to even come up with anything snarky. Save us, BiP!

This is not a spoiler for Bachelorette as this person is already gone, but CH tweeted a hint that So there's hope they'll bring back some of the earlier cuts!

Words can't properly describe how jealous I am!! Although I'd probably need 20 drinks and a tranquilizer beforehand... I couldn't even stop shaking meeting a few WWE wrestlers (I know, I know) so I'd probably fully fall apart in front of Momoa.

Hahaha! Jason Momoa is like my ultimate sexual fantasy at the moment, but I like your accurate description of his frightening eyebrows. (For the record, Momoa seems like an awesome down-to-earth dude who likes rock climbing, Guinness, and spending time with his adorable family, so don't let his eyebrows fool you.)

Ok, guys, I have a confession and since I've seen a few people asking for an explanation, here I am... I've totally done the "bachelor handshake." So I'm 5'3" and it seems to be a thing that usually only happens with quite tall guys. It's a combination of you reaching up to hug them (if you put your arms around their shoulder instead of their waist) and them naturally starting to give you a little lift so that they're not hunched over to hug you. The guys are equally at fault as they seem to enjoy picking up small girls. Then once you're in the air, it seems natural to wrap your legs around them. I've done it with tall friends as well, not just guys I'm dating. Although, not so much anymore now that I'm older, but back in high school and college, it was a go-to when giving hugs. Feels like there's some added enthusiasm in your greeting. I guess this doesn't so much explain Becca doing it since she looks to be fairly tall, but for the petite Bachelorettes, I get it. Well, Becca clearly doesn't want me to enjoy any eye candy this season. Hot Mike, Hot Christon, and cute banjo player all going home in the same episode?! All of this after the early loss of Grocer Joe too? Not cool. I'm not very attracted to any of the men left except maybe Wills and Jason. Wills is easily my favorite and I hope he ends up being the next Bachelor. I was jealous of those great all-encompassing hugs he seemed to be giving Becca. I like a good hugger. My first thought was also of Rocky when Becca gave Jordan those gold underwear! He'd be the perfect cosplayer to bring to a RHPS! I also get why Becca is keeping him around (not just producers). She seems to laugh a lot at his antics kind of like Nick did with Corinne. He's too ridiculous to take seriously and she probably likes the levity. Watching the other guys' expressions during Lincoln's flat-earth and friction talk was the best. Ugh, Garrett does nothing for me. He's not cute, and his divorce explanation was severely lacking. If I were Becca, my first question would have been, "What made your marriage deteriorate so quickly after you'd already spent years together prior? And if those issues were there before the marriage, why did you even get married?" I noticed how she still referred to his ex-wife as his "previous relationship" without acknowledging it was a marriage at all. I also picked up on his comment about his "bloodline" which is just a super weird thing to say. I'm hoping Blake, who is seemingly her second favorite, pulls ahead because they seem like a good match as well and he throws up fewer red flags than Garrett. I like Leo but I can't help be disappointed a little bit because he is not even half as good-looking as Jason Momoa but also bears too much resemblance to Jason Momoa not to make the comparison.

I've done a 180 on my opinion from last week and am super bored by this group of guys. Notable exceptions are Wills who still has my goodwill from his Harry Potter fandom (also seems nice) and the Globe Trotter guy who is just pretty hot. Alex made me sad trying to hold back tears after the rose ceremony and he was cute too. I'd probably like to hang out with Leo as a pal but I also feel like I could walk into any hipster craft beer brewery and find a Leo clone there. Playing frisbee golf on the weekends. Buying beard sculpting products at an artisan shop. Jordan is so much fun because it's impossible to take him seriously as a threat. Look at villains past who were actual contenders... awful Courtney, Vienna, Corinne, Kalon, douchey guy who came back to visit Ashley in Asia, whatever. These were people the leads actually had feelings for. Nobody can possibly think Becca has the slightest interest in Jordan. Therefore, just enjoy him, he also doesn't seem like he's putting any of this on for show which makes it even better. Loved him telling Becca that his (not their) future child might be called Jordy Jr and he'd carry him around on his shoulder or some BS. It was just so nonsensical. If I were Becca, my concern with Colton wouldn't be that he dated one of my friends, but HOW he came to date one of my friends. It's unlikely they happened to run into each other at a bar. He must have sought her out, thereby showing that he was trying to wedge his way into the Bachelor world before he ended up on Becca's season and conveniently ended it in time to appear on the show... hence, not there for the "right reasons". Becca has a great body and wore all her outfits really well in tonight's episode, but her face doesn't do anything for me so it's hard to see the big attraction (sorry, shallow). I would have hated that demolition date! How freaking wasteful! How much did those TVs cost? The guitars and furniture? Those could have gone to people in need. The pointless destruction of expensive or even just useful items upsets me. Are they going to drag out this narrative forever that Arie is the most awful heinous villain ever for NOT marrying Becca and going after the woman he truly loved when he admitted he was pressured into a decision the day of the proposal without having the proper time to think it over? And who has now set a date with Lauren to be married next year so clearly did actually take the process more seriously than a lot of other past Bachelors? All that Arie cutout at the cocktail party last week did is remind me how much cuter Arie is than basically all of the dudes on this season. Whatever, Team Arie for life.

Hmm maybe I didn't give him enough credit. It could have been the vigor he popped out of the hearse with, maybe it would have worked if he had executed it more somberly.

I have never been so angry after a first rose ceremony as I was watching Grocer Joe get eliminated!! On night one?! What the fuck, Becca?! He owns his own grocery store! He was super cute! He was nervous and looked so sad when his name wasn't called! Dammit, he can bring home free produce for me and we'll probably hand roll manicotti together (I'm just going to go ahead and assume he's Italian) and I'll listen to that adorable accent all night. Screw you for robbing us of him, Becca (and other choice words). Anywaaay... I was actually impressed with this group of guys, and I was definitely not expecting that just by looking at their pictures. I've already picked my own personal finalists (for me, not for Becca who can't see the appeal in a sweet Southside Chicago grocer). So, obviously I would take Joe. Harry Potter guy already had my interest with his pretty eyes but then he revealed his expecto patronum tattoo and I was over the moon planning wizarding dates and fun Sorting Hat callouts at rose ceremonies. Can he be next Bachelor and we can bring in a bunch of awesome nerd girls?! Banjo guy is adorable and had my favorite suit jacket of the night (it reminded me of the patterns on a 1970s couch) PLUS he had that great "catching feelings" line when outdoorsy guy was fishing in the pool. If I was Bachelorette, well, there's my top 3. Globetrotter guy was hot and also had gorgeous eyes. He reminded me of one of the guys from Remember the Titans (Julius I think?). He seemed a bit too much like a cocky athlete for me, but I'd definitely keep him around awhile. Nigerian guy is also hot and has that accent which puts him high on the list. So, I really liked the minivan entrance and the outdoors clips in his intro, but I'm going to withhold judgment on Garrett for now. Colton has a nice smile but isn't my type (I really am not into athletes), plus he strikes me as very young. Wow, I usually hate the villains, but please keep model Jordan on my screen as long as possible. Everything he said was gold! I think my favorite though was when he told Becca upon first meeting that the color gown she had chosen wasn't what he had expected (I wonder if it didn't coordinate with his extensively thought out grey suit). This probably doesn't say much about my level of class, but the guy who drank champagne straight out of the bottle would have gotten a rose from me for that sole reason. I was ready to hand out my first impression rose to whatever beautiful goth boy would pull up in a hearse, then it just ended up being some bland idiot who immediately misused the word "literally". What a disappointment. My friend and I were oddly attracted to Chris at first which is surprising because he looks like a mix between the not so attractive Ron Perlman and (as pointed out above) Eddie from Friends. He seemed very calm and confident. Then he turned into a gossip queen on night 1 and I was over it. I was excited to see them all outside playing a group game of basketball which was so different from the usual Night 1 formula of getting drunk and fighting over personal time with the lead. I won't discuss the previews, but I was very excited to see that dragon staircase in Chiang Mai! I was just there the other year! Also Becca had some awesome dresses on. I'm weirdly excited about this season even though after one rose ceremony Becca has already disappointed me greatly. At least it is some consolation to see I'm not alone in my love for Grocer Joe.

My favorite part of the night was when CH asked me if I even managed to get any sleep last night, because he sure didn't. I mean, it was a bit rough, my cat woke me up a few times attacking my roommate's dog and generally being needy, but... oh, wait, you mean because some guy I've never met broke off a 6 week engagement with some girl I also haven't met and allowed it to be televised likely because his contract stated that it had to be? Umm... no... can't say I was tossing and turning. People seem to be taking this A BIT dramatically. I was in the UK last week and just caught up (hence my commenting on page 11 of the forums and probably nobody ever seeing this post), but I had two friends text me almost simultaneously to ask if I'd watched and was pretty immediately spoiled by the news outlets and social media. But, I was kind of disappointed that the supposedly shocking finale was just Arie dumping Becca for Lauren. People make mistakes. I could easily see myself being in Arie's shoes (although operating at a higher IQ level) and not really knowing who to pick at the end of a two month period where I was expected to rapidly develop intense feelings for multiple people and choose one as a life partner. He followed his head instead of his heart, an easy mistake to make. The good thing is that he actually realized it so early on and was able to rectify it. He went wrong in two areas: 1) Shouldn't have let the show pressure him into proposing. 2) Shouldn't have allowed it to be filmed, although, again, contracts. Otherwise, if he hadn't broken it off with Becca before the finale, she wouldn't be Bachelorette today (an infinitely better deal than being F1). He and Lauren look ridiculously adorable and happy in their post-show photos. They're in Iceland right now. They're cute and I'm happy for them. She's not all that bright or interesting, but let's be honest, neither is he. I hope things work out for them. Whatever. Like, just this outrage over how he handled things in a really intense, confusing, short amount of time while being confined by the show and dealing with the spotlight is just too much. Should he have broken up with Becca a year from now after acting his way through a relationship and giving it an "appropriate" amount of time even though he knew it was wrong? Lost Lauren for good? Told Becca right away that he'd called Lauren and realized he wanted to be with her before he properly thought the whole thing over? He should have broken up with her privately, but otherwise, there wasn't a great way to deal with his dilemma. He was actually on a time constraint if he wanted to make it work with Lauren. Man, people on the Internet would TEAR me apart if they were following my own personal life right now, ha! Nobody's perfect. Also, Becca clearly consented to the cameras following her through the airport, onto the plane, and back to her home... Just saying, he didn't handle it super well, but it hardly makes him the worst person in the world. Just kind of dumb and easily pressured is all. Chris Harrison deserves far more vitriol, in my opinion.

She's the brunette going for her PhD who broke up with Arie in Tuscany. She was wearing a red dress last night and looked fantastic. She's too well-spoken and intelligent for this show. (I think you're thinking of Caroline the realtor who was unnecessarily shrill and over-emotional last night over a bunch of things that didn't affect her whatsoever.)

This was easily one of the most boring TWTA shows ever. I feel like 50% of it was just a recap of the season (with an inexplicable 5% dedicated to a movie wholly unrelated to the franchise). There were only a few things that made this worthwhile: Arie's total smackdown of Krystal, news that Bekah will definitively NOT be the next Bachelorette, Jacqueline looking drop dead gorgeous (I see they were auditioning Tia and Sienne but I was so hoping they'd give Jacqueline a shot up there), clips showing that Arie made sure not to waste the food provided on dates, and the hype for this finale. I'm totally unspoiled and am actually pretty excited.

C: "You make me feel things nobody ever has before." L: "I'm sorry." Oh, Courtney and Lily! You may be my all-time favorite Bachelor couple!! If I ever found a relationship that witty, fun, and playful, I would never let it go. Between the snow angels, the fantasy suite discussion, the throwing snowballs at her window, their (clearly should have been first place) ice dance, and their super amazing cross-country road trip, I was nearly crying at how perfect they are. I, also, was wondering about what visas they managed to get, because I've been in two serious international relationships and it is near impossible to get someone over here. Work visas are like unicorns and very difficult to obtain. Otherwise you can be in the country 90 days on a visa waiver, absolutely no more than that. So thanks for the info on entertainment visas! I was curious. I think it says something that the two final couples who chose NOT to go to the fantasy suite had much more romantic dates than the two who did. I'm so mad that Ashley I & Partner won 1st place just because she lost her virginity on TV. There's no other way! They were clearly bronze. Dean and Lesley just seem like they're trying too hard. I keep getting really annoyed at this misconception that New Zealanders would know nothing about winter sports. They get their fair share of snow in NZ! Especially in the South Island! You'll find mountains and glaciers and ski slopes. It's not a year-round hot country like Australia at all. I'm a fan of Jordan's shaved head! Rebecca from Sweden looks just like Jennifer Morrison. Luke, you absolute fucking prick!! I can't believe I actually bought into his feelings for Stassi! What a first-class asshole. Good on her for totally calling him out in front of the audience. Of course those conversations never happened. And thank you ABC for playing the commercial break footage. The way his eyes went dead as soon as she was trying to have a serious conversation with him... he's the worst kind of human. And I'm tearing up at Clare and Benoit! Aaaahh!! How did the Bachelor pull off this amazing after show? If the Bachelor Pad where Nick took the money for himself was the best ever Wrong Reasons reunion, this is easily the best Right Reasons reunion. I'm so happy for these silly reality TV contestants. Please more of this in the future!

Lauren's dad was fully prepared to give the stone-walled hardass approach to Arie until Arie mentioned the troops, and just like that he's practically calling him "son". Tia's mom looked like a Muppet. I'd love to hang out with her dad at their "Cook Shack" though. I wanted to know what sort of felonies her brother has on his record. Kendall's twin sister was like the wise hippie whose tent you find yourself in receiving life advice and tarot card readings while lost in the woods tripping on acid.

Courtney and Lilly are my favorite couple of the group, they genuinely seem like they're having fun and really into each other (without any weepy declarations of love, which is clearly why they've been given no screentime... oh, that and neither of them hooked up with an American contestant). Plus it's a realistic relationship! They can live in each other's countries! A technicality that the other international couples (and show) seem to be completely ignoring. However, Lilly looks like she just walked straight out of a 90s teen sitcom (Saved by the Bell?) between the bangs, the lipstick with an otherwise clean-scrubbed face, and the plaid dresses. I've done a total 180 on Luke and Stassi and actually think they both seem pretty deeply into each other. It could work out if they're both down for a whirlwind marriage. Stassi has already moved countries in the past so she might not have a problem doing it again once she's got the green card. Chris Harrison to Yuki: Well, umm... this is awkward... we were hoping you'd kind of realize on your own, but we'd like you to head back to your side of the world now since we weren't the least bit clear about the rules of this competition and have decided we're done with the singles... Poor Josiah and Ally! I think they really did like each other, and Josiah seemed very genuine with her. I was also shocked to hear he apparently didn't kiss a single woman from, what, May until December?? Maybe he's not the cocky type he seemed on Rachel's season. Oh, also, I found Ally to be one of the cuter women there. I was feeling sad for Ben until I realized they were filming a Bachelor audition and then I felt betrayed by Ben's tears. You may come to Paradise, sir, but please do not take over yet another full season of this show. Rachel was catty! Jojo was more fun than I remember her being on her season. Arie was pretty which is all I ask of him.

I know! It's not great storytelling. We have no idea why/how Courtney and Lilly click so well as they gave us a quick snippet of them making out in a hallway and a voiceover that they're together, but nothing to show build up. All of a sudden that Australian girl comes out of nowhere this episode thinking she has a connection with Kevin when we've never seen them talk. Luke/Rebecca dissolved with no reaction from her over her friend now dating him. Maybe they should have lengthened the episodes a bit because it seems a lot is happening off screen.

I knew she wasn't Swedish!! Thanks for clearing that up, I kept thinking maybe Russian. I also loved her comment about the snow. Luke asked a stupid question, he deserved it. Luke is actually cracking me up with the amount of projection he is putting in their day-long relationship. Luke opens up about his heart, now Luke can't believe the connection they've formed. He keeps telling her his feelings about their connection without any affirmation on her side. It's like he just assumes it must be reciprocated. When he made that sappy comment about how they both cried during their first conversation (did that even happen? not with the scene I watched), she just gave him a silent smile, like, "sure, buddy, you're hot so I'll let it slide." Dean is such a child!! God, Lesley, you can do so much better. The boy is trying to backtrack already and you've only been talking for two days. He's got issues. He comes across as 17, not 26. She opens up about everything she wants in a guy and the only response Dean has is "You think I have a pretty face?" Also, I think Lesley might be the most attractive woman there (or at least my girl crush of the season). Ben wins major points for keeping Yuki around. I can't believe nobody gave hot Swede Rebecca a rose?! What? There is definitely a big difference in fashion sense down there. It's kind of liberating though, you feel like you can wear just about anything out. In Wellington (NZ), you would see at least a few people literally out in costume on any given night (or day just walking down the street). ETA: But I don't think we can be talking down the foreign women's fashion sense too much when Ashley showed up to the rose ceremony in that hideous underboob cut-out abomination. I actually watched a few episodes of that kiwi guy Jordan's season!! I knew he looked familiar. That show was so glaringly low budget in comparison to the US (and again, big difference in the women's fashions). He chose some blonde girl, Fleur, who was nice and well-liked, over this bitchy Indian girl, Naz, then at the aftershow Naz told him she'd still be open for something to happen, and I guess shortly after it all came out that he dumped Fleur. And I think Naz told the media that the two of them had sex. I do recall him getting skewered over the situation. At least we actually saw the dates this week. Did I black out and miss the ones last episode? It seemed like last week's date card just gave Luke and Rebecca permission to leave the cabin and make out on the hill in the backyard. Nooo Benoit! It was his birthday?! Clare, you idiot! I could jump aboard the Benoit for Bachelor train. We've already had two Canadian bachelorettes... why not? Clare lost any goodwill I had towards her in this episode because not only did she send Benoit home (you know, the EXACT kind of guy she keeps saying she's waiting for), she then turned around and was also horrible to Christian! I have no idea whether or not he's a decent guy, but he really did nothing wrong in this episode. She pulled him aside already mad that he told anyone they were meant to have a date, then completely misunderstood everything he was trying to tell her. Poor guy was so confused. (I agree with whoever above said the "nothing more" probably meant that they had nothing more to base their attraction on yet aside from looks and humor.) Then she told him she had no idea he was interested in her?! He straight out told her he was interested in her before the last rose ceremony! Plus she had no reason to go off on him over how the situation with Benoit was none of his business, etc etc. He wasn't having a go at her over it in the first place. All he said was that he wasn't going to pursue her while he knew she had a relationship happening with one of the other guys. Seems fair enough. It was up to her to go to him and say she was done with that and was interested in him. Pretty much exactly what Kevin did with Bibiana. The woman thrives on drama. Then the long pause before accepting his rose. Ugh. Spare me. The biggest couple's fight on the season so far is happening between two people who haven't even kissed yet.

Clare has the two hottest guys there both interested in her, which I am so excited to see, and she's 36! That's got to be the oldest a woman has been appearing on this show, right? Yay, Clare. However, also no, Clare, unless the guy is strung up on a funeral pyre, he is not "LITERALLY smoking hot". I'm surprised to find out anyone who hears Benoit associates it with anything aside from Chris Benoit, the wrestler of murder/suicide fame. And my perspective on Christian's whole "now I can't talk to anyone else" statement is that it's just a clear declaration of intent. Sort of a "now that I've talked to you, it affirms that you're the one here I want, and there's no point in focusing on anyone else." It's a good move, really, especially on Clare who has gotten used to being passed over on these secondary shows. I adore Japan! She's too adorable! No way anyone actually voted Eric out! How could they?! I'm pretty sure Ashley's plan for the last 5 years has been deflowerment on national TV or bust. She clearly won't do it any other way, but the older she gets, the more of a gimmick it becomes and the more dangerous it is for some dude to venture into that territory. No guy in their 30s is turned on by taking a girl's virginity anymore. You passed that window of opportunity in your early 20s, really, Ashley... your best move now is to downplay it ala Becca from Chris's season so that guys aren't worried about you going stage 4 clinger afterwards. I remember reading a news article about the (Aussie?) girl who hooked up with another girl on her show. They even did a magazine cover together afterwards. Guessing that didn't work out in the end. I spent a year and a half living in New Zealand, so it hit me right in the heart seeing the guys come out doing the haka. Also, I'm sure Ally's accent sounds a lot more English than Kiwi... maybe she relocated to NZ at some point? Or am I hearing things? JudyObscure, I get what you're saying about Luke and Dean. I find them both somewhat sexy, but then it's like... their heads are too big. Something not helped by the fact that they both wear their hair piled long on top. However, Luke and Rebecca would have pretty babies, and Dean and Leslie actually seem endearing, but I did always like Leslie. This is like Study Abroad: Bachelor edition. It reminds me of my college semester in Europe- a bunch of horny internationals mingling in co-ed dorms for the first time. Get wild and hook up! Everyone has accents! I really don't know what's wrong with me, but this show made me tear up for the first time in my life watching that Chinese girl go home. Did I drink too much port?! What's happening? I just feel like these poor foreign contestants don't know what kind of soulless hell pit they were jumping into getting involved with the US franchise.