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jade.black

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  1. jade.black

    S08.E01: Winterfell

    I'd really love if the show threw a huge curveball and Gendry ended up on the throne with Arya by his side. That's probably the least likely way I could see this going, but also two of the only people I'd ENJOY seeing rule who have any feasible claim to it. Their reunion this episode was second only to Jamie/Bran's as my favorite (and long-lost spouses Sansa/Tyrion coming in third).
  2. jade.black

    S23.E10: The Women Tell All

    Well, now that they've shown she can string a toast together, I'm on board with a Hannah B season. She's cute and actually has a personality, plus I liked her limo exit. Honestly, though, it's probably mostly because I dislike Caelynn so much. That dancing montage at the end was the awkward Colton I remember from Paradise.
  3. jade.black

    Dragon Age: Inquisition (and the Dragon Age Universe)

    Thanks! I'll check it out, and I agree. The characters are what really made the games for me, and definitely what put it over the Elder Scrolls. I think Skyrim and Cyrodiil were more interesting landscapes to explore and the cities had more character to them than the maps in DA, but I never felt so attached to the story and characters as I do in the DA games. It's so well crafted and the creators have obviously put so much care into their universe. I played as a Dalish female, didn't harden Alistair, and I had a happy ending. Just let him stick with the Wardens in the end as opposed to
  4. jade.black

    S23.E09: Week 9

    Girl was playing it the whole time! I think the last time a contestant waited this long to pull out was Frank on Ali's season. I've been spoiled this season so watching all the drama around the "wrong reasons" warnings and Colton frantically trying to find reassurance that it wasn't Cassie has been so fun to watch. Not sure if Tayshia was disappointed the next morning over Colton's "other" skills, or because she really thought she was going to take his virginity. I, for one, am glad that Colton cleared up that he's at least gotten a blowjob somewhere along the line. Still, that being said... Hard pass.
  5. jade.black

    Dragon Age: Inquisition (and the Dragon Age Universe)

    I never realized there were gaming forums on PTV and am so excited to find this! I just played Dragon Age: Inquisition (my first DA game) for the first time a few months ago and this is by far my favorite gaming franchise ever. I was always a big fan of Skyrim, my first open world RPG, and the other Elder Scrolls games (as well as Fallout etc), and to this point nothing had surpassed it. After completing Dragon Age now, however, this should be the bar set for RPG gaming. The characters have so much depth and I'm in awe of the layers it must take to write the scripts with the different outcomes based on choices. I was so attached to every one of my companions by the end of Inquistion (well, maybe not Blackwall, eh) that I was practically euphoric to find Trespasser and play through. I romanced Iron Bull throughout which was hilarious and sexy (the scene where your advisors walk in on you had me dying), but I'm definitely going to need another playthrough with Solas (although I'll stick with Iron Bull as canon- his alternate ending in Trespasser is also heartbreaking, but I saved the Crusaders so luckily I only had to watch that on YouTube). Even just little touches like Cassandra reading through excerpts about your companions from Varric's book through the end credits of Trespasser are amazing and you can tell that the creators really love their franchise. Plus the fact that your character truly feels like your own. I've watched a few clips of other Inquisitors or Wardens that people have made and they feel 100% detached from who my main characters have been. I went back and downloaded the older games for my PC afterwards, and I've finished Origins. The graphics were a little jarring at first going backwards, but I quickly got used to them and was just as immersed in the game as Inquisition. The Alistair romance, for me, was so perfect and organic to the story line (plus he's hot, sarcastic, and romantic, what more could you want), and it made the twist decision at the end all the more shocking- Honestly the complicated and morally grey decisions are one of the best parts of the game, as much as I wish they'd be a bit more clear cut at times. I've been painfully waiting until the DLCs for Dragon Age 2 go on sale again on Origin- I paid $5 for the base game and don't want to pay $25 for the DLC pack- but I'm excited for that too.
  6. jade.black

    S23.E07: Week 7: Denver, Colorado

    Kirpa seems like she just took 5 Xanax before every camera appearance. That said, I liked her lack of overt cheeriness and her dead eyed unapologetic response to Cassie. Cassie seems immature (although beautiful), but Caelynn seems so very fake. I know she was going for "shocked" reaction when Colton mentioned her wanting to be Bachelorette, but I'm pretty sure her face actually lit up at just the thought of it. I actually like Tayshia although do think she seems a little "on" all the time for the camera with the perma-smile. In her defense, Colton was practically begging her to name names, so why not. I think she'd be a great bachelorette, although Hannah G would be fine with me as well despite her age. If only every breakup was as painless as Heather and Colton's! I don't think I've ever seen two people so gleeful and nonchalant about a relationship ending. Hannah B is nutty but she handled her exit like a strong woman who knows her worth. And she managed that in a nightmarish pink satin monstrosity, so even more props to her. Oh, and I just feel the need to point out to everyone making Sean/Catherine references, I believe that he has actually said Catherine wasn't on his radar at the very beginning and it wasn't until a few weeks in that she became a front runner. It was one of the things that made his season more interesting than most (that and he actually had surprisingly great taste in women, Tierra excluded).
  7. jade.black

    S23.E04: Week 4: Singapore

    This was the craziest part of the story to me. Her sober friend was there and SAW these guys sexually assaulting them and/or taking photos of them passed out? Are they still friends? Shouldn't this girl have stopped the guys or gotten her friends home safely? Really odd detail that was glossed over. Courtney was at fault here... he's not going to come to you when he has a rotation of girls approaching him all night. And then, when she finally got up off her ass and could have gone to find him, she goes to confront Demi instead and waste even more time. No sympathy there. I thought Demi remained pretty composed considering how Courtney acted towards her. To be fair, Demi has never started fights with any of the other girls herself, she's only fought back when other girls had an issue first. Also, Colton is so obviously a kid. Stop getting caught up in girl drama. Nick and Arie were so refreshing in their approach to the women's drama, which was basically, like- settle it. Colton is actually taking these petty spats to heart and it's ridiculous. And STOP telling the girls word for word what the other girls just said about them! Did Courtney really need to hear, verbatim, that Demi called her the cancer of the house?! No. I've been bungee jumping twice (once at the Nevis in NZ with the same company they jumped with, AJ Hackett- heyy!) and give major props to Tayshia for keeping it together so well and actually showing enthusiasm. It was a nice change of pace from the bachelors having to practically force their intended date who is in tears to take part in an extreme activity. Don't forget the death penalty for drug possession!
  8. jade.black

    Future Man

    I just binged through the whole series in a matter of days, and season 1 was some of the most hilarious stuff I've seen on TV in awhile. I was dying at least once an episode. The 70s frat house, Wolf's drug escapades, the blowjob scene, Josh's parents (both present day and flashback), the first "charge up" scene. It was so outrageous and fun to watch. Loved the time jumping, loved the cast interaction, LOVED Wolf. I was pretty disappointed in season 2, unfortunately. It kept me interested for the most part, but I'm not sure I laughed out loud even once. It only picked up towards the end when the main cast were working together again, but even then it didn't really capture the brilliance of season 1. I think a big part of the humor was in Tiger and Wolf not understanding societal norms in the past, so the future setting didn't do many favors for the show. The only bits I really loved in season 2 showed the bond between those two and Tiger struggling with them being on the outs (those actors have great chemistry). Hated the NAG storyline- I get that Wolf adapts to any situation, but it seemed abrupt for him to just accept this family life (which I was bored to tears by) and put the biotic mission behind him completely. Ty-anna was unbearable to watch until her Achilles reveal. I just think it dragged for the most part and there was a lot of missed opportunity. Tiger's whole identity as a biotic had a lot more potential than what they did with it. I do kind of love the joke that Josh is treated as an expendable third wheel on his own show. One of my favorite moments of the series is the CPR scene when they're about to write him off as a loss rather than have to go rathole to rathole. "He died a hero's death". I really hope the show picks up momentum again in season 3 with a faster pace than the last.
  9. jade.black

    S23.E03: Week 3

    I definitely think Hannah is horrible, but to be fair here, that does not mean that Caelynn is not also horrible. Wow, harsh sending that girl home on the group date! I'm sure she wasn't such a burden that he couldn't nicely wait until the rose ceremony. She didn't do half as badly as weirdo Hannah on her one on one last week. Two nightmare dates this week: children and working out. *shudder* My friend and I both physically recoiled when we saw Colton going in for the kiss with someone. He looked like a kid playing dress up with that pirate outfit on. Demi and all young girls who think they're immune to aging crack me up. I just turned 30 but I feel like 23 was still yesterday. Although I'm sure Demi will have settled down into a chirpy soccer/PTA mom role by then, showing up to softball games in revealing outfits and flirting with everyone else's husbands. At any rate, I'd happily be relegated to the cougar den rather than have to board with a bunch of early 20 somethings and their drama.
  10. jade.black

    S23.E02: Week 2

    I have so little to say about this episode, but I'm just going to add on: Erika, who was gorgeous and seemed funny last week (the girl who brought the nuts), was sent home this week, and the only clip this episode we really saw of her was telling Colton that she was going to be honest with him about kids and right now could just picture herself with a bunch of dogs. I feel like this is the first time we've heard a woman on this show say that kids were not 100% in her plan and it was really refreshing... unfortunately, I think they only drive the narrative on this show that everyone wants the family experience- house, wedding, and babies. Wish more contestants would acknowledge that not everyone's life has to follow that formula.
  11. jade.black

    S23.E01: Week 1: Live Premiere

    Colton's odds seem good but it won't be easy wrenching that honor off reigning title holder, Chris Soules.
  12. jade.black

    S23.E01: Week 1: Live Premiere

    Well, I'm back. To be honest, I fully intended on skipping this season because I'm petty, and I wanted the franchise to feel my wrath by losing my all-important viewership. Instead, I've gotten my vengeance by being fully spoiled for the first time ever, so... take that, Fleiss...! Plus, I need to know who I'll be watching on BiP. So, if we can swiftly move past the unbelievably cringey live fan segments, I am actually all in for the group of women this season. There are some very good looking girls in the bunch (the Cuban I think, Nicole?, for instance, can stick around just for her face- she looks like Rose Byrne). BINGO! I was like, this girl must have signed up for Jason and now she doesn't give a fuck. Climbing trees and out-weirding Colton. Demi though is going to be my absolute favorite. Stick around and entertain me, you pint-sized confetti cupcake! I also liked Nut Girl. I wish they'd stop showing us shirtless sexless Colton. I was glad at least fake-Aussie dropped a "how ya goin'" at the live show to add some authenticity. I'd rather have a Courtney and Lilly show really but I'll have to survive on their Instagram stories. And I'm all here for the sequins (SPARKLE) but Demi's yellow dress probably was my actual favorite of the night. The Harrison montage was the highlight of the show. Eh... I thought I had more. I don't. I'll be here this season, but I'm watching every week with my friend so technically they aren't getting that extra view from me! Bastards.
  13. jade.black

    S05.E09: Week 5: Part 2

    Uhh, you want a 22 year old who is still in the prime party years of her life and probably just on the show looking for Insta likes? Or a 20 year old who can't even go to the bar yet? Is that wife material for you? Go clubbing every weekend and have her realize in a year or two that she hasn't taken enough time to date around and figure out what she wants? I wish they'd cast MORE women (and men) closer to 30. The majority of contestants are still childless and have never been married- there are usually only a few each season that have, and just as many men on the Bachelorette seasons. Contestants closer to the 30 year mark are far more likely to want to settle down, which is what this show should be looking for with the premise of it ending in marriage. And for the record, the women they cast are way hotter than most of the men. And ALSO for the record, I love a healthy dose of cynicism in a man or woman. I'd argue we don't get nearly enough of that on this show, maybe we'd avoid so much teary heartbreak over week long relationships if they had a bit more.
  14. jade.black

    S05.E09: Week 5: Part 2

    So, like, what if you get a contestant who absolutely does not want children? I want just about nothing to do with babies or small children, and I'm just imagining looks of shock and horror if someone were to say, "Yeah... babysitting and babies in general just sound like a nightmare to me, no thanks." Not everyone's fairy tale or life plan involve children, but hey, I don't think the producers have even considered the possibility that some are turned off by kids. The contestants always talk about having babies as if it's a foregone conclusion. What if they connect with someone who is like, nah, I don't want any? I did love Jordan's disgust at Jenna's choices of baby names. "Tucker?!" And his declaration that their babies would come out cute, giggling, and ready to be weird. Shushanna had no interest whatsoever in NZ Jordan until Olivia sat her down and took two seconds to convince her. Shu was basically all, "Really? You can picture me with Jordan?" Olivia goes, "Yeah totally, you guys looked really cute and natural the other night." And Shu is immediately all, "Yeah we did, didn't we! You're right! I'm over Kamil." The witch thing was as blown out of proportion as the scallops thing last season. It sounded like Kamil was making an offhand joke (although it's hard to tell if he is capable of joking), and it was Annaleise who decided to go to Shu and tell her Kamil legitimately thought she was practicing witchcraft. Shut up, Annaleise. She's so smug now that she's part of a 3 day old "solid couple".
  15. jade.black

    S05.E08: Week 5: Part 1

    So I was so filled with rage at the spoiler that Colton was going to be named Bachelor that I spent a shameful amount of time combing through Bachelor hashtags and accounts on Twitter to see what the general consensus was. I was very pleasantly surprised to see that just about every random fan on social media was also furious about the lead being an immature young kid who has spent most of his time on the shows crying, remaining noncommital, and being bland (plus the whole potentially closeted factor). I was actually thinking, wow, the producers HAVE to see that Twitter is exploding with super harsh backlash and change their minds in the next few days before the announcement like they've done in the past, but nope. And Fleiss has been an absolute dick about the decision too just doubling down on it. He was posting Bible verses about not passing judgement (they weren't even entirely relevant and gave me the impression he's taking a victim stance on his decision...?), then right after the announcement tweeted "We hear you Bachelor Nation" which got some great "fuck you" responses, and then just now posted a "I can't deny the fact that you like me" gif. I realize people were also highly upset over Nick Viall and Arie being chosen (both of whom I was thrilled about), but they were older, more mature, decent conversationalists, and seemed comfortable in their own skin if nothing else. Just ugh to the whole thing. I've never considered sitting out a season, but I really am here. I'm hoping it's a trainwreck- and not a fun trainwreck like Juan Pablo's season (who I love to this day for refusing to play by the Bachelor rules) but like a none of the girls are interested and Colton can't carry the show trainwreck. ^This is entirely the reason I speculate on him possibly being gay. Really the only way I'd be compelled to watch would be if this turned into a first ever coming out Bachelor season where 25 men help Colton be proud and comfortable with his sexuality. Otherwise the truth is actually just that he's a childlike famewhore. And he was really juvenile and dickish to Jordan on the Men Tell All. Also I can't bear yet another season of analyzing someone's freaking virginity because that's all we got on the many shows featuring Ashley I. Ok. I'm done.
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