RedZoneTuba

The snotty voice on every damn pickup truck commercial (either Denis Leary, or an evil simulcrum thereof). Scolding me for daring to think of any other model truck, in the most condescending and sarcastic tone imaginable, does NOT make me want to buy your damn truck.

Not sure if this one has been mentioned before... If you are taken to a closed room, you see there is a huge wood chipper sitting there, the host has you put on safety goggles, and then asks for your smart phone...are you REALLY going to be completely surprised when he puts your phone in the chipper? Really? If so, I'm afraid you're too dumb to own a smart phone anyway.

It should become TWO states: "Left Partisania" and "Right Partisania"

Agree 100%. I particularly hate the way he tries to respond to her passive-aggressive sarcasm and she cuts him off with that "AHHH!!!", sounding like a parrot being strangled with piano wire. My advice to him: Insurance is the least of your problems. Run! Run far away! Avoid years of psychological torture and ultimate divorce.

I use this one all the time when Mrs. Tuba and I are discussing going someplace: "I'll go if I don't have to talk."

I don't know if it's the same one you're referring to, but if it IS then I completely agree: The lady is told by her doctor that the Crestor lowered her cholesterol, so she goes on a euphoric dancing and smiling spree out of the office, into the streets, and to a softball game. Meanwhile, the narrator says something about Crestor being for when "diet and exercise are not enough". Um, maybe it's impolite of me, but she looks to be definitely on the "hefty" side and I can't help but think "Are you SURE you gave that diet-and-exercise thing a chance?"

It's probably been mentioned already, but...The VW commercial with the old ladies sexually harassing the salesman about the "rear end" savings days. Hell hath no place hot enough for whoever at VW thought this ad was amusing. (And reverse the genders and see how fast the ad gets pulled and some folks at VW lose their jobs.)

Maybe Larry David negotiated the price down and the exec just wanted to get rid of him so he and his date could have dinner?

If I was the AT&T rep, my response: [smiling politely] "Reluctantly, much like your mother admits that you're her child."

Nina, your lyrics stink wink For sure, fink-blink Your lyrics are a hideous thing, I know

I thought she was a co-owner or some executive with the company?

Didn't Diane Chambers already try that once?

I noticed that all the guest roles on the show who are writers were portrayed as very unpleasant/borderline-psychotic. Consider: Yuri Testikov Elaine's dad Rava O'Brien Jake Jarmel (sp?) - he was OK at first but then he got really paranoid about having unique eyeglass frames I wonder if this was just a coincidence, or whether the Seinfeld writers who were "just" working on a sitcom had some underlying professional jealousy of "real" writers?

Just the other night I sat alone in my living room, the ticking clock the only sound in my empty house as the late afternoon shadows lengthened across my floor. I sighed deeply and gazed out the window at the nightfall settling in and the chill wind rustling the skeletons of the leafless trees. I realized, at that precise moment, that if only my car had wi-fi I could finally have true happiness.

They should market it as a feature. "Do you have an infant child and want to give Mom an occasional break?..."

Yeah, next thing you know they'll be trying to sell us a plastic bottle with just plain water in it!

One trait of Jerry's character that I haven't seen mentioned in other discussions: he caves in way too easily to coercion, even when he is clearly in the right. Examples... His old (incredibly obnoxious) "friend" from the old neighborhood who started sobbing when Jerry "broke up" with him, so Jerry caved and strung out their relationship. All the people in his building shun him when he politely and reasonably explains he won't be doing the "kiss hello" anymore. He caves to this peer pressure and backtracks on his position. Banya insisting that Jerry didn't buy him dinner yet for the Armani suit, even though they went to Mendy's and Jerry bought him lunch at the coffeeshop. Jerry caved again. In all these cases (and others I can't think of right now I'm sure) I've thought "C'mon, you're in the right, Jerry. Get a spine for chrissakes!"

Did you ever try parking one of those battleships?

I finally saw the hashtag Toyota ladies (several times) this weekend. No words, or even faddish text markup, can express my rage and instant revulsion. #nowIhateyouToyota

I also like in that pregnant-woman-going-into-labor episode when Hawkeye tells Radar that he needs to help and Radar replies (in panic mode) "How will my fainting help?!?"

Wow. I don't care how economical it is, I don't think you should be using used toilet paper! ;-)

There's the ambulance-chaser ad where the sleazy lawyer lists the questions that victims of mesothelioma (sp?) would supposedly have. I always mentally add: "Who are these damn lawyers that keep bugging me and why won't they leave me alone?"

Off-the-wall idea...Martin Short He seems sincere and warm in person, the movie industry never found a decent way to use him, he's great at both sketch comedy and improv, and TDS could do the occasional Jiminy Glick guest interview. (If you don't know who Jiminy Glick is, here's a sample: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RR5N0IV5oe0 )

Please, not Samantha Bee. She can be OK in small doses playing a role as a reporter, but there's something about her voice and demeanor that indicates she'd be terrible in interviews and serious parts of the monologue. She just seems always sarcastic and/or condescending to me. I believe if we were at lunch and she said "Pass the salt, please" I'd think "What did she mean by THAT?!?".

OK, I'm really starting to hate the razor-blades-by-mail-order ad where they show how hard stores try to get you to not buy their razors, but mail-order-guy really wants you to buy his. The retail store security guard has booby traps and tasers for anyone who wants to buy a razor, including the tasing from behind of the old, frail-looking man (so hi-LAR-ious!). I understood the marketing concept of exaggerating the faults of the competition, but this goes FAR beyond that into some science fiction fantasy version of retail. Where do these people shop, anyway? I always just buy razor blades pretty much like everything else: you put them in the basket and go pay for them. Never been tazed or groin punched in over 40 years of razor buying!