Jeeves

^^^All of this. Because I just now watched that video and I don't have sufficient words. Although I do have these words. True story: A few minutes before I checked this forum this morning, I was flipping through the books and sample books in my Kindle library on my iPad. I've downloaded a sample of The Sociopath Next Door - which I read last year (borrowed from the library) and am thinking about buying. I re-read the beginning of the book which constitute the Kindle sample. Then, as I said, decided to check this forum - and watched that video clip. I'm not a mental health professional, but Whitney's huge guffaws while telling this story were just chilling to me. And thanks to @3girlsforus, I didn't miss that "I was about to get evicted because my roommate" remark. Yeah, Whit, you're just a laff a minute - and how horrible of your roommate to get your lease-breaking ass out of her home. Not. IMO this clip could - and probably should - be used in psych classes when the subject is sociopathy and narcissism. What I'm still wrapping my head around is why TLC has this clip on its YouTube feed. Are they so totally immersed in a world of narcissist reality TV personalities that they no longer see what this is? SMH.

Over in the Duggalo topic I commented about Jinger's upcoming role as the pastor's wife, and currently that means at Jeremy's shabby-looking mini-church in a converted bungalow in Laredo, TX. Where the new meek helpmeet will, among other things, be expected to pitch in and cook the big "free lunch for anyone who wants it" that follows Sunday services at that little church. The wives of clergy have been traditionally viewed as unpaid labor, available (joyfully, even) to perform tasks from cleaning to social work, in support of their husbands' churches. I doubt that Jeremy's conservative male-run denomination is any different in this respect. So Jinger will have a new job along with the ring, whether she likes it or not. Which got me to thinking about Jessa. Bin wants to be a preacher when he grows up. if he does, he won't be instantly at Joel Osteen levels of income and conspicuous consumption lifestyle. No private jets just at the start. And Jessa Blessa, she who loves to sit and preen, and is obviously uncomfortable meeting new people (as shown on the show last season)? Would be expected to work as a typical pastor's wife. I just can't see Jessa carrying out the role of hard-working pastor's wife at some small obscure church in CowFart, TX. She would have long days of cooking, cleaning, hosting or helping at church-sponsored events, teaching Sunday School, and generally interacting constantly with the members of the church. Would really cut into the selfie-shooting and SM posting.

I think Jeremy can't wait to get the heck outta that mini-church in a converted bungalow in Laredo, Texas, and step up in his pursuit of fame, power, and wealth path in this sinful world bringing souls to be saved by Jesus. In the meantime, if he's still the pastor there after the wedding? Jinger will be the pastor's wife. Because the church's Sunday services are followed by a free lunch for anyone who wants it*, the pastor's wife is going to be cooking a big meal every Sunday, week in and week out, and no doubt cleaning up afterwards. While the pastor does his pastor-ly thing of fellowshipping with everyone. I doubt that she'll get a pass just for being pregnant, unless she's ordered to bed rest. When the courtship was announced I looked up Jeremy's church - both his little mini-church branch and the main operation. It's clearly a male-run organization, and as has been discussed here, it's anti-gay and anti-Catholic, and AFAIK these guys are all in to the gender roles exemplified by the Duggars. Women are helpmeets to their husbands. And pastor's wives? Are traditionally looked on as unpaid labor in support of their husbands' church. I see no reason to think Jeremy's church is any different. Of course, besides being a meek helpmeet, Jinger brings the Duggar celebrity and those lovely checks from TLC. As with everything Duggar-related, Jeremy's little church will take a back seat to the TLC shooting schedule. I doubt Jeremy hustled back to Laredo to cover his scheduled services, from the TLC-paid trip to NY and Philadelphia. Maybe if Jinger has to actually live and work as the wife of a young pastor in a non-glamorous situation? Jessa Blessa will get her eyes opened as to what she might expect if Bin actually gets to be a pastor when he grows up. Jessa has really skated: living on the Duggar dime while Bin scrubs a few toilets, takes online courses, posts his religious rants online, and they both perform for the TLC cameras. I don't think Jessa would take very well to being an actual hands-on, hard-working pastor's wife in a small obscure church somewhere in SheepFart, TX. *The free lunch is on the church's website. Not saying it's the norm at the main church of that denomination, but I suppose it's part of their outreach in a border town with, I'm sure, a lot of poverty where a good hot meal would be welcomed by a lot of struggling folks.

I'm obviously not @MunichNark, but here ya go. It's a term used in the UK, short for "Old Age Pensioner." I think it's generally the same population we in the US call "senior citizens" or just "seniors."

It wouldn't take long. They just have to watch Diana Vuolo or her daughter play the violin for an hour or two. Then they'll be equally good violinists. They are, after all, Duggars.

Good point. He is, after all, a world class grifter. I'd like to think he won't find Diana Vuolo an easy mark, though. But JB also seems to be a survivor, like that Whack-a-mole game where the thing keeps popping up. So anything's possible.

A few random thoughts from my so-called mind about Jeremy, his family, and this engagement. It's clear from the photo posted above, of his mother and sister playing violins, that they are worlds ahead of any Duggar in terms of education, smarts, fashion sense, and navigating the real world in the 21st Century. I posted this over in the Lonely J's topic soon after the courtship was announced and before this topic got started: I would love to know what Jeremy's parents and sibs really think of the Duggars. I figure his dad, a fundie preacher, will totally love JB and MEchelle and all their grifting ways. But I think that his mom and sis - and perhaps other members of his family - may have reservations about a lot of the Duggars' ignorant separatist BS. I'm SO looking forward to wedding party photos showing MEchelle in her inevitably freakish ensemble that will scream 'I AM THE MOST MODESTEST WOMAN IN THE WORLD AND I'M FROM THE BACKWOODS OF ARKANSAS!!!' - standing in a group which also includes the tall and nicely dressed Diana Vuolo. Heh. Also, I hope hope hope the TLC producers will set up a scene where a proud JB hauls out his kids to saw away on their violins as a treat for Diana and/or Jeremy's sister. Since they all have playing the violin in common. And they get really really good camera angles on the faces of the Vuolos as the kids perform. Probably the Vuolos will have the grace and tact not to go all stink-faced at the kids' playing - after all, Diana runs a charity that gives kids music lessons. But I'd still love to see that scene because I'd like to think that they are not gonna be big fans of herpderp JimBoob and since they have met him by now, are already over him and his "I HAVE NINETEEN KIDS!! NINETEEN!!" My final thought is that I found this comment posted on a story about the courtship and it sums up Jeremy so well that I had to share it. BTW, for all I know it was posted by someone who also hangs out here:

I'm pleasantly surprised at how many likes I got for my long itemized post above about the non-fabulousness of Whitney's life as shown on this series. I've been thinking about it some more, and I do believe that anyone, anywhere, with any kinds of physical limitations, disabilities or diseases, can still live what I would consider a "fabulous" life. The "fabulous"-ness of a life is so often, IMO, a matter of attitude and behavior. A morbidly obese person who uses a CPAP, can barely walk and has little physical stamina, and needs help tying their shoes - all of which are on that list above - plus being poor and maybe without a supportive family, could still have a fabulous attitude and live a positive life despite needing help with daily tasks. Now, probably someone with a truly positive attitude would eventually want to do what they could to improve their health, but I won't get into fat-shaming territory even to say that. Physically challenged (including disabled) people all over the world do useful things, all the time, and many of them do so with a wonderful attitude. On further consideration, I believe Whitney's life to not be"fabulous" mostly because of the attitudes and behaviors we've seen her display, over and over, on the show. She could really tackle her health situation, instead of playing childish denial and manipulation games. If she womanned up and got real about adopting healthy behaviors? I'd call that fabulous. She could start being mature, unselfish, and kind to her loved ones, instead of sneering at her dad when he brings her toilet paper and food, and calling her mother a BITCH on national TV. If she stopped acting like an entitled brat, and manipulating everyone around her into doing what she wants at the moment she demands it? IMO she'd be in the running for "fabulous." Nope. She can be fat and fabulous. But, IMO she isn't living a fabulous life, and her attitudes and behaviors are the reason why.

I saw promos for this show back when it started but didn't watch it until a few weeks ago so I missed the first season. Just from the promos I didn't feel that I understood the show's premise, although I assumed this was an obviously overweight ("fat" per the title) woman who was also fit and healthy and (judging by her always being shown in workout clothes) physically active, and living a fun life. So I tune in a few weeks ago and find: Whitney has to use a CPAP machine to sleep. She isn't "fat." She is morbidly obese. She smokes. She seems unable to walk very far or very fast. Her "dancing" seems very limited and I haven't seen much range of motion when she is "dancing." She couldn't "dance" very long before nearly passing out and being taken to the emergency room. Where the doctor referred her to a cardiologist. She can't shave her own legs or tie her own shoes. She cries and gets all pissy when she doesn't get her way, and apparently has her friends and family intimidated to the point that they won't say "no" to her about anything. She stalks her boyfriend - who looks like a backwoods hermit and displays less emotional range than my coffee table - at 3:00 am when he hasn't responded to her texts. Pardon me for being Captain Obvious, but IMO none of that ^^^ stuff is fabulous. None of it. The only fabulous things I can see, are that her parents still love and care for her (enablers though they are), and she's getting good money from TLC for being on the show. I don't wish her ill, but she's not on a good path.

I don't think Jeremy's all that photogenic, and to he can look quite different from one photo to the next. As to my opinion of him. He's a former professional athlete, meaning that even without being a superstar soccer player he's been given a lot of adoration and consideration and perhaps adulation, beyond what mere mortals in our society are accorded even if they are brilliant cancer researchers, amazing tech geniuses, or gifted teachers of children. (Yeah, I am out of fucks to give about all this athlete adoration - though I admit to cheering like mad during some pro football games when "my" team is playing - and I view the Olympic$ with serious skepticism. I know, it's a little contradictory. So, sue me.) Anyway, he's gone from college/pro athlete to super-fundie "apprentice" preacher in a male-dominated gay-hating authoritarian theology, and the most he can say about Jinger is that she's "meek." The only non-negative thing about Jeremy as far as I'm concerned, is that he didn't grow up as cloistered and ignorant as the Duggar kids. Otherwise, he's just another young fundie male preacher-wannabe asshole who gets to combine career advancement and fame and a TLC paycheck with getting laid regularly by a subservient well-trained meek Duggar wife. Exhibit A: Derick. Exhibit B: Ben. OK, Jessa's not "meek," but she plays the gender role games along with the rest of 'em.

Here's some info on portion sizes that I found a few years go, at the National Institutes of Health website. On this page there's a two part slide show, "Portion Distortion," that compares US portion sizes of 20 years ago vs. today. Probably that "before" info is now more like 30 years ago, because I think they created this at least 5 years ago if not more. IMO the slide show is overly simplistic as to "calories in, calories out" as it purports to tell us how many minutes of exercise it takes to "burn off" the huge calorie loads of today's big portions, but I just ignore that part, and I find the comparisons of sizes and calorie counts to be quite thought-provoking.

Yes. I just got home to find this news on TV. Horrible. Hope it's over soon with no more casualties, .

I doubt that Twit and Kerryn are besties at all. But I call shenanigans on Twit's "just happening" to see that ballroom dancing poster when they were having that "ballroom dance lesson" with the camera crew there. **Shrug** It coulda happened that way, but I wonder if somebody on the production crew saw it and set up the Twit. Probably knowing that her instant reaction was to hog that spotlight and go for the gold. Despite the fact that she can barely walk around the block and get her feet into shoes, she's gonna sign up for that pro/am dance competition. Because she's A Professional Dancer. We'll probably never know if she saw the flyer and it was her idea to enter, or if somebody suggested it to her in a way that was guaranteed to push her buttons so she jumped at it. However it started, I predict that it will end in tears. Whitney tears.

Bringing this over from the Boob/MEchelle topic. Lawyers in the US take plaintiff's personal injury (including med malpractice) cases on a contingency fee basis. So no need for Boob or Derick to pay attorney fees upfront. However, we really don't have all that much info on Derick's current medical situation although we know he looks bad in most photos. Is this an interim situation, with future procedures planned? What was the actual medical reason for the past surgery - cosmetic or something functional that takes precedence over cosmetic appearances? Is Derick's current appearance within the realm of possibility or probability that was discussed with him pre-surgery? Did he follow his doc's instructions as to post-surgery care? There absolutely are qualified doctors, dentists, and dental surgeons in Central America*, but did Derelict and Moonbeam blow off finding the right one and just wing it with Derick's follow up care? I don't think they've disclosed all that much about his current situation and talk of lawsuits is IMO speculation stacked on speculation. But OTOH he does look bad, so I understand why the subject would come up. *A friend of mine recently had tooth implants done in Costa Rica at a fraction of the cost of what a dentist here in the US would charge, including his multiple trips over the months it took. He's quite happy with the results.

Oops. Taking my response to the Dullards topic. I didn't realize at first this is the MEchelle/Boob topic.

I agree, it's harder to lose weight the older you get, in my experience. And I'm older than you. Sigh. I read the books "Wheat Belly" and "Brain Grain" and have been moving toward a low-carb high-fat diet which seems to be the only thing that even has a chance of working for me. I follow Dr. Davis (the Wheat Belly) author on social media. One of his strong recommendations - along with dumping all grains which I haven't quite managed yet - is to have a really good thyroid test done. I'm convinced, along with you, that the 30 year old nutribots generally don't know squat about the actual metabolic status of post-menopausal women. And, IMO, neither does most of the medical profession, or at least the front line professionals. If I hear "calories in, calories out, it's all a rigid simple formula" from one. more. so-called expert, I'll probably just lose it. Thank goodness my new primary care doc actually works with me to check on symptoms and doesn't just say it's because I'm overweight (which I am, and which I'm sure doesn't help but it also isn't necessarily the cause of everything wrong). Good luck to us all!

^^^Exactly! We've seen her throw up that wall of incomprehension/denial before. The one I remember most clearly is when she was lying in that bed in the hospital ER, with her parents at her side, and just totally blowing off what the doctor was saying to her. The doctor wasn't being melodramatic or exaggerating anything, just stating some plain medical facts. But Twitney might as well have put her hands over her ears and sang "La la la la I'm ignoring you La la la la!!" like a little kid. IMO a lot of that is what I call "the addiction talking," meaning she's acting out her addiction, for want of a better way to say it. I don't know what the odds are that she will ever be able to abandon her addictive behavior with food, given her very aggressive and perhaps narcissistic personality. She's so used to steamrolling over everyone and not only not taking "no" for an answer, but probably not even hearing "no" half the time when it's said to her. All this is of course JMO. And, for a "professional dancer," she sure has an awkward and inefficient way of walking. Those long shots of her walking from her vehicle to the cake place were a nice little tweak by the TLC editing monkeys. Her brother easily strolled the short distance, and wound up ahead of her. I'm in the "She's a professional dancer? my ass" contingent here.

I've seen a new(ish) TLC promo, running on other cable channels, spotlighting its "I am . . ." theme. The Duggs aren't included as far as I could tell, and since I'd DVR'd it I rewound and watched carefully. They have the Sister Wives bunch, Jazz, the fat and not-so-fabulous Whitney, and others. But no Duggs. TLC continues to give the Duggars their own page on its site with video clips of their mind-numbingly boring little righteous lives. But also, TLC didn't include any Duggars in its recent public event in Chicago featuring appearances by several of its series stars. I think TLC's still not sure what to do with the Duggars. The painfully vapid "Counting On" episodes drew a million viewers but few sponsors, which means it wasn't hitting at its ratings weight in terms of ad revenues. They tried going stylish and edgy with that photo shoot of the older kids and kidults (minus the grifting missioncationers who weren't worth flying back from Danger America to participate), but that was just strange. Because the Duggars are so - passive. They are all about being cloistered from, and righteouser than, and "a little bit different" from, well, regular everyday American people. They used to be sold by TLC as the "sweet, righteous, holy, untainted, obedient, extra-large, lovable family" during the 19K&C heyday. After that facade was blown up by Joshgate, it's just been . . . odd. TLC's got a death grip on their huge corporate investment in the Duggars and I'm sure the bean counters have sweet dreams of someday being able to again monetize those zillion episodes by running them as repeats. There's a gleam of possible future revenue from a rehabilitated and redeemed and "cured" Josh, but AFAIK he's still poison and putting him on the show right now would be controversial. Would draw ratings but probably reduce ad revenues even further and cause backlash. TLC is not ready to move on. They just can't quit the Duggars. I can imagine their geeks working the spreadsheets, developing the business cases for hanging on. Or, as the title admits, "Counting On."

I don't know. It's possible Josie is sitting there wondering why the camera person and her piano teacher are talking so stupid to her. It's also possible that she just learned to tell her right hand from her left, of course, which is sad if true. About Josie's appearance: I can SO relate to her. I was "blessed" with pale coloring and flyaway blonde hair. I was by no means a neglected urchin, but it's hard to tell by looking at snapshots of me as a child. I also had prominent blue eyes, and I was shy. Not stupid, not developmentally disabled. Just funny-looking, especially in photos. So I'm not quick to judge Josie although it wouldn't surprise me if she's not getting adequate parenting and education. This is after all a child of Boob and MEchelle. Sigh.

I also don't think it could be JimBoob. I just can't see any Duggar being called "A-list." Duck Dynasty has been a much much bigger splash, with authorized DD merch and all.

They are indeed uneducated fuckwits who've never been let out to go to the grocery store alone. But, they have a TV show. A show that so far has proved to be more long-lived than cockroaches or mold. Just adapts and keeps on going, and apparently will never. ever. die. So, anyone who hankers after celebrity and being on the cover of People magazine for knocking up his wife, or getting knocked up by her husband, will definitely want a Duggar. Not only is there fame, there are paychecks. Some would think it a sweet deal.

Oh, lord. My memory must have tried to grow scar tissue over that one. Yep. The Christmas Doctor. Have mercy.

I also liked your post. I do have a different take on Sean's father, though. Of course this is all based on scant info, which is only what Sean and his mother said in the THs on the show. I agree that Sean had anger/behavior issues as a kid. I came away from watching the episode, thinking that his father may have also had a short fuse. Not to say he was physically abusive, but it seems quite possible to me, that he had a short temper and was harsh with the kid. Not every man automatically knows how to handle a small child who's acting out, and a kid tantrum can easily push an unprepared parent into a harsh response. Obviously, mom has "spoiled" Sean, and after dad left she had a clear field to do that. But I don't assume that before he left, dad was just a wonderful great patient guy. I believe Sean when he said that his father got in his [Sean's] face and yelled, and he was afraid when that happened, and lived in fear of it happening again. I figure it was an unhappy little family unit with a child with anger/behavior issues, a father with some kind of anger/impulse control, and a mom who couldn't or wouldn't say "no". I hadn't thought of his mom as "weak" although that may be true. IMO, she's getting something out of the situation that she had a lot to do with creating. Sean's dependent on her. Maybe all she wanted was to be able to quit her job and not go out to work, and having a disabled son at home allowed that to happen. Maybe she'd rather take care of Sean than hold down a job and especially at first it was a relief to not have to get up and go to work every day. (Some people hate holding a job, they just do.) Maybe she didn't think it through at first and now it's gone down this path and she's not uncomfortable enough to figure out how to change the situation.

Not in the real world. But in Duggar Christian Purity Fantasyland, being alone and touching "unwraps a gift" that was meant to be saved for marriage. I wish I were kidding. I just posted this over in the Seewald topic but it's also relevant here. This is from the "relationships" book that the elder daughters "wrote" a few years ago, and has been recently re-released in a revised version: -- from this 2015 story. Seriously, that crap essentially equates hand-holding, and maybe even being alone, with sexual intercourse. And WTF is that about "not being able to fully enjoy the pleasure of the sin?" I think I know what they're saying but that's badly worded. Delusional asshats.

Yes, and it would make for enough footage for a couple of episodes. Remember that show, Ruby? Ruby visits her therapist. Ruby consults a nutritionist. Ruby and her friends are in Ruby's kitchen "trying" to "cook" something "healthy." Ruby consults a plastic surgeon about procedures to remove excess skin after weight loss. Ruby gets skeeved like a twelve-year-old over the idea of having a scar on her upper arms after such a procedure. [Note: this is a 50-something woman who used to weigh 900 pounds and apparently thinks she by some miracle has a bikini beach body in her future.] Ruby visits her therapist again. Ruby gets her eyes examined and fusses about needing glasses. Ruby and her friends go shopping for Ruby's glasses. Ruby's supposed to be on a journey to lose weight. Often, Ruby weighs in at the doctor's or somewhere, and is puzzled and hurt that she's either lost bupkus or even gained weight. MBFFL is IMO, pretty much Ruby II. Twit goes to dance class. Twit goes to the emergency room and totally refuses to hear what the doctor says. Twit hangs out with her ex BF and his GF and her new BF and plays a game. I mean, officially, vs. the games she's always playing. Twit calls her mother a bitch on national TV. Twit visits a doctor. Twit hangs out with her pet pig. Twit eats in her car. Twit whines because people are mean to her about eating in her car. Twit and friends get into a hot tub. Twit rides a bike. Twit has a faux job interview for a faux job. Twit insists it's all fabulous and when things go wrong does not concede that ANYTHING could possibly be related to the fact that she's gained 100-200 pounds since the first season of the show and is morbidly. fucking. obese. Not fat, not fabulous. Morbidly obese. Both these faux reality shows hit the mark with their "stars:" Narcissist attention seeker? Check. Morbidly obese? Check Odd assortment of friends and hangers-on? Check. Star is marketed as "sooo inspiring!!" and a role model? Check. Star is an immature tool? Check. Star is unable to understand - whether from being a dimwit or in the throes of addictive behavior - the cold hard facts of their physical and medical situation, and unwilling to do anything appropriate to get better. Star is an extravert who can turn on the charm? Check. Star can turn on the ugly when thwarted? Check. (Though Twit really wins this one hands down over Ruby.) I kinda got sucked into Ruby's show for a few episodes until the whole picture started to be revealed. Someday if there's a life review after I die, or some kind of heavenly reckoning of my life, I will no doubt have to atone for the time I spent watching TLC freakshows like this.