candall

I have a little wiggle room in the fulfilling real life category, plus I missed a couple of audition episodes, so I'll comment, too. : ) I hadn't seen either of the two acts with the . . .computer backgrounds? The couple floating in air and the man turning into a bird and flying away--both stunning. I had seen the quick-change clothes artist, but I liked seeing it again. It's so silly and yet I'm still amazed and mystified. I'd only read the comments about the nonagenarian stripper, but WTF??? They did her no favors passing her on, let alone presenting her with the golden ticket thing. She already had a cool experience to entertain her friends & family, she did NOT need the pressure of coming up with a followup set of gyrations. I can't believe they highlighted so many substandard precocious kids and spunky seniors. Even though my ear is pretty much tin, I think that kid belting out Nessun Dorma was sufficient to prove the same bar could be set for everyone.

Hey, I'll lead the old broad charge booting those "somewhat talented but mostly getting by on cute" kids. [Note: I only saw her on the compilation show, but the nessun dorma kid hit my official mind:blown mark.]

I'm swimming against the stream again because I loved the premiere and was bored silly with this one. I didn't think the background music repeatedly swelling into "dun dun dun DUN" territory was a good substitute for, you know, actual tension.

Full co-sign on this! Although I can see that this kind of light, fun show would endgame everyone neatly matchy-matchy instead of breaking some ground to leave the main character complete and fulfilled as a single. (Maybe just ONE character, though? Huh?) "Women are always told to feel empowered and not feel like they need a significant other to be complete." I can't tell you happy it makes me to hear this described as the current zeitgeist. Around where I live, women are pretty much considered "still looking" right up to when they slide into "what a pity, bless her heart." Men are regarded with a little more suspicion than compassion. I'm proud to report I think "spinster" and codeword "confirmed bachelor" have passed out of fashion. Sigh.

Okay, caught up with the first half. And now I say Nicole's "Waaaa, hate to vacate where I feel happiest and healthiest, but my mother-gut says my kids need me" . . . Hooey! There's the person who releases the hefty food source fishie (which still makes me silly with happiness, btw) and who learns--foraging for a single, desperately needed, meal--that the cold has killed off the whole damn veg menu. And then there's the person who makes enough pine sap fire starters to last for weeks. Who you gonna call, ghostbusters? Maybe I'm just feeling grinchy and (extra) cynical today, but while I'm riffing on long-term planners, I also think that if Jose had pulled off his masterplan and had salmon jerky stockpiled to the rafters, we probably wouldn't be hearing how wifey is the only prize that matters. How could that guy, Obi-Wan Wilderness, ever bring himself to say, "Fuck it, I screwed up and I'm starving to death out here: Mayday!" I don't speculate much about Larry because I don't know how much to trust Larry's editing. He didn't really spend an entire week repeating "I'm bored" to the camera. Has he consumed five thousand tiny protein-packed mouse T-bones we didn't see? If Larry wins, he'll be that flimsy little nothin' string of dental floss--that could tow your car in a pinch.

I think the psychological impact of hitting Day 57 had to be HUGE. That was really the only marker they had, calendar-wise. Once that goal is achieved, there's no other "number" to shoot for and with time stretching ahead interminably, whatever morale you had mustered would just start hemorrhaging. Back up the deadly dumptruck of depression. ******************* I think a crew shows up every week for a look-see and a battery exchange, right? I wonder if the survivalists? contestants? campers? all make themselves crazy searching for "clues." Hmmmm, based on the time the boat arrived and the heft of the battery bag, maybe they're only making two stops! Did that medic give me a secret wink--am I close? "So what time does the cafe' close for lunch? Think you'll make it back in time?" I'd love to hear some production notes about how they maintain neutrality without leaking information. Or maybe they don't. With people this starved for interaction, it would be easy to push an agenda one direction or another, with little things as subtle as an eyebrow lift. Either way, the medic and the PA with the battery packs probably aren't trained to be masters of deception. Wouldn't it be so interesting to observe one of these visits? But I guess they'll never pull the curtain back that far.

Okay, I only saw the last 24 minutes, so maybe I'll change my mind when I see the whole thing, but . . . Nicole, I really feel like reaching through the tv and giving you a smack. You felt your children were well-adjusted and independent enough to get along without you for eight weeks, but then gave up the chance for all the college education money they'd ever need so they wouldn't be without their mother for two, three, four weeks more? There better be some seriously risky out-of-control unsupervised teenage partying going on at your house for that kind of tradeoff to make any sense. Did not expect to hear the "I miss my wo-wo-wo-woman" refrain from Jose!

Oh, you guys are such softies. There was a metric ton of snarkworthy stuff. Boris literally sailed off into the sunset. . .okay, well, motorboated off to his sunset backlit yacht. Geez, I thought they were setting up a Divya spinoff. The beautiful harried mother of many navigates the pressures of med school, where she already knows far more than her classmates--I could see that being pitched. (Are we to understand Divya ended up exactly back where she started, with only her MD-enhanced slice of the Hankmed pie to show for all that trouble? Or do they all spend three months each year staffing Hankmed, slumming in the Hamptons?) Re The Final Staff Meeting, were Divya and Evan at loggerheads for all these years and I didn't notice? That would have been a natural bit of friction, if anyone had thought about it before the last episode. (Small sidesnark: no one gets champagne unless Divya agrees to some apple juice. Bwah!) I was amused that Boris assigned Shadow Pond to "the use of the hospital administrator." I can picture Evan's wide-eyed disbelief and sputtering, some years down the road, when he's reminded of those terms. Short shrift for Jeremy, my favorite. Eyeroll for the nice bottle of cab at the table with a view of the African veldt, but I was okay with Hank's epilogue. (Never mind my grousing for the last three weeks that all the nesting and moments of self-awareness were just grist for the ultimate Jill+Africa mill.) I understand the itch to switch up your entire life after everything gets too settled. Hank may eventually decide to go treat the Russian peasants infected with plague by foes of Boris's bid to restore the oligarchy. Take care, everybody. P.S>I loved Campbell Scott being all Rico Suave, but did anyone ever understand the Boris Kuester von Jurgens-Ratenicz story? Posh bazillionaire, rare genetic disorder, home shark tank: Work it!

Tell me one other person on that boat who would have gracefully volunteered to decline his share of the "season's biggest tip" after lying in a bunk with a 103 fever, getting a medevac to the hospital and coming back with a course of antibiotics. No question Danny's foolish and obnoxious, but that doesn't make the Captain's decision to cut him out of the tip after a confirmed illness any less unconscionable. Shame on you, Captain Mark. And fuck all the rest of them for going along with that, too--no one had any trouble taking their share of the cut when Danny contributed EXTRA tip money into the pool.

Agree, there are so many issues littering the field, they're all getting short shrift, but THEN I remember worrying that this season's focal point might be Rachel's horrible mother trying to have her committed. I'm so relieved to skip that soapy standard, I feel more tolerant of the socio-political scattershot.

Okay, wow, I am WAY in the minority here--I liked it a lot. I too thought we were going to spend forever going through the machinations of tormenting Chub Girl before New Girl relocated her moral center, but nope! Mean Girl surprised me by being smart enough to admire New Girl's moxie and integrity more than she admired her Bitchy Bestie. And the way she conveyed her approval was in keeping with her natural cool cat demeanor, so boom, we're there with minimal fuss. (Finding Carter would have stretched that development over three episodes, so thanks, A&E or whomever you are.) My main complaint is that the details are a bit fuzzy on my non-hi-def tv and my non-hi-def eyes. There was a little behind-the-scenes clip after the credits where someone explained that the clothes on the racks became filled with the same actors who played the floating dead bodies in the prologue. They were grabbing at her and she's still sensitive about the handsy thing because of losing her grip on ex-Mean Girl. Okay then, got it. See? We're moving along at a nice clip, which I appreciate. Teens aren't my favorite show base, but I like spooky and so far, the criteria is being met. I think New Girl has some powers--she seemed alerted to the danger before the cabin burst into flames and . . . did she teleport outside? I got the impression there was some supernatural foreshadowing in the glass beaker breaking, too, but again, fuzzy. At any rate, her mother seems pretty fatalistic about Amy's socialization process. For the love of God, just TRY to fit in! The stereotypes aren't toooooo bad. Mysterious double agent Deputy Camper/Townie, mysterious Elizabeth Mitchell, Amy's mysterious co-newb. Hot Girl with the bitter boulder on her shoulder. Central casting upper-class prat snipping the tags off his clothes? Could be something interesting going on there. And of course, Tony Todd. Candygram!

Yeah, I'd be pretty insulted if someone told me "I love you, I'll fix you. I can improve you." And I'm not even a $40M celebrity athlete. Or a man. Ooh, ooh, Rachel's fleeting expression of doubt, hovering only two steps above shame-face, got a Season Two callback. Hi!

Strangely, I can see this use of "produce." It sounds more business-like than other verbs she might have plugged in there: trick, manipulate, seduce, blackmail . . . Loved "Quinn and Rachel cozying up to God" and RC's haiku--everyone here is so funny! I can't worry about being funny because if I lose focus, Darius' spine is going to snap in half. It's very distracting--Don't slump back like that! Sit up straight! Spine!

NOOOOOOO!!!! I was all snuggled in for the Lifetime's Independence Day Marathon, but we had terrible thunderstorms all day, so the satellite feed kept stuttering and skipping segments and NOW I find out, the big Season Six two-parter hospital shootout DID NOT RECORD! All I got--superimposed right in the middle of the 700-pound man episode--was Gary's disembodied voice saying: "I was going to shoot you and then myself, but I only have one bullet left." Okay, people, I can't be expected to endure all the aftermath of wounded psyches, Teddy torturing Christina over doomed insurance husband, Calzona "coping" with that ever-so-brief stint in Africa and who knows what other nutfuckery--coasting all the way to the plane crash--without the rocket booster fuel from the hospital shootout. (No streaming here, either. Blerg.)

Too bad. Sounds like King Jr. tackled an ambitious project too soon. Weren't the Bachman books early efforts that King Sr. dug out and spruced up, post-celebrity? They weren't, er, gems, either. My favorite King book is The Stand, however, and I always wanted to know MUCH more detail about how people initially dealt with the plague apocalypse. So many tasty details to ponder--if everyone else is dead, do you hike your 'fraidy cat butt all the way over to a nice airy bridge or do you suck it up and shortcut through the pitch-black Holland Tunnel? (Answer: BRIDGE!!!) Note: I keep forgetting there's a longer re-issue. Maybe he wasn't in such a rush to get everyone to Denver/Vegas? I just finished The Girl on the Train and it's such a bestseller, I'm sure there must be some discussion back there in those 24 pages, but I'll just put my complaint into a secret box.

Since GoT finished squeezing out their annual eyedropper full of shows and 60 Minutes has turned into a soft news magazine, this is my favorite Sunday night hour. They're all just so awful, I giggle my way through the whole show. The giant hamburger patty of hair on top of Damiano's head is worth the price of admission. I can't figure out the mechanics--where are the ends? --He cracked me up, earnestly explaining to the judges that--in the frozen food challenge--the eggs were frozen! The butter was frozen! --Jernard finally made it crystal clear that nine kids = masculine virility. --Uh oh, Erin found her way back to the smidgeons well. Lorraine didn't seem particularly overjoyed about the reunion, did she? --Someone finally applied a touch of the brakes to the runaway Tregaye express. And that's not how "clutching my pearls" works, Slangy. --Bye, Joy, hi to the kids. P.S. Your biscuits were much too thick for that task. --I thought everyone was quite harsh, glaring daggers at Ana. Oh good, Ana's able to rationalize that. --Bless your toothy little heart, Giada. Disagreeing with Bobby does not exactly create a "tie." .

Mmmmmm. . . Can someone go milk that mama bear and do a nice butter poach?

The Editing of Jose is this season's big mystery. Since he makes all those videos, he must be comfortable speaking to a camera. Is it possible they trimmed his sections way back because he was so much more adept at the wilderness stuff than anyone else? I'd fast-forward all those other jokers if Baryshnikov were a contestant on DWTS. ************ I had a good friend, a long time ago, who was being scrutinized by the NIH because he and his sister were diagnosed with MS at the same time--rare, because there's no genetic component. They were told that avoiding stress was crucial, so he took that as his cue to swath himself in an extremely pampered lifestyle, while the sister refused to "give in" to any personal or professional changes. Her symptoms progressed much more rapidly than his. I don't know anything about current protocols, but now I'm sort of freaked out about Nicole. Surround yourself with bunnies, sweetheart, not bears. ************* Originally, I allotted them three extra weeks of gumption for the early start with the better weather, but I don't think that will pan out in the long run because they'll already be worn down nubs when the cold wet weather hits. Plus, time will stretch ahead, depressingly ad infinitum, once they pass the old record. I pick: 62. (With a sidebet on Jose and David duking it out for the purse.)

Who's his dad? Also handsome? And a big jerk?

So what's the latest? My friends have yet to meet "fleek"--you can help me lap them by about ten years. : )

Is there a Josh? He's clearly not getting his daily dose of the Famously Single Vitamin Crazy. I'm so tired of people shrugging off their bad behavior by explaining that's not really who they are. "I shouldn't be held accountable because it's beyond my control--I'm only like that when I drink, or I'm driving, or I'm pissed off, or hungry, or the day ends in y." I'm 100% behind Aubrey & Pauly D. Take each other off the market and make the rest of society a better place.

Good episode, lots of tension. Jose didn't waste any time feeling sorry for himself when he finally reached the promised land and there were only bones left. I thought he was pretty awesome admitting he'd been too single-minded with his master plan, trying to impose his own agenda onto nature. But at the same time, I have to question his continued dedication to aesthetic, over and above function. When you're at the point of hoarding energy calories, the fish aren't going to hit your beautifully carved Inupiat rig any harder than a strictly utilitarian model. It makes me wonder how many passing salmon were lost in service to technically unnecessary details in his boat design. 20+ days? As they say in GoT: Winter is coming. ***************** I admired Nicole for her decision to scavenge bear scraps. I'd eat bear leftovers if I could find any fresh enough to pass the smell test. I wouldn't be thrilled about the fly larvae, but bear spit wouldn't slow me down for a second. (I wouldn't have taken a chance on the quasi-pet duck who died of mysterious causes, though.) The very best part of that venture was Nicole LISTENING to her inner "Danger!" voice. She'll probably never get mugged by the man for whom she held the elevator door, either. The Gift of Fear--it's a thing. And a great book. Seriously, why aren't they all wearing big eyeballs on the backs of their heads? Is that stupid? I thought it was Season One genius--or at the very least, couldn't hurt. Good call, @seasick, that Nicole should have sheaves of dried edible plants strung up. I know that hay retains nutrients because it's harvested green and fresh, while straw does not. Winter: coming. ************************* Okay, Larry, you could have roughed out a pawn for your souvenir VI chess set in the time it took you to tick. . . . . . . . . . .tock at me. And you think a ten-day wood supply is excessive? Winter, FFS!

Where their job descriptions overlap--i.e. his food planning/prep and her food service--Ben and Hannah aren't peers, Ben in is charge. We've seen Hannah make suggestions and communicate guest requests, but he's the decision-maker. I'm no great fan of Ben's or his self-serving casual charm, but I still think he ticked the right box for a starting point. Hannah's been pretty upfront that she's open to whatever Ben will agree to, so "friends" and "lovers" are probably still options after they've smoothed out the "co-worker" dynamic. Besides, those "define the relationship" requests rarely end well for the person asking.

This is my first watch; is she's new this year? I hadn't taken any particular notice of her . . . until she asked the Smith couple: "What are you guyses' names?" Ouch. Maybe smooth the rough edges off the basic questions when you get the moderator gig?

Originally, I thought she fluttered around and was annoying, too. For some reason, this time I'm noticing how often she steps up--with Mark, with the secret surgical group, with Meredith and the liver transplant, with inappropriate next-door Torres, whenever anyone needs someone dependable to do something. The only time she fell short was getting overwhelmed by the severe burn victim--and she even powered back from that.