Victor the Crab

Gitmo much smarter than he lets on. Gitmo figure out what asswipes Cruz and Rubio are up to. BTW, it's always a laugh when Jon fucks up his puppetry. Merry Fucking Christmas to you too Jordan. Although I could have done without seeing the stream of urine coming out of that one Santa. Chris Rock is the best. He and Jon have great rapport. Can't help but wonder how Tracy Morgan is holding up. A toss to Stephen is the perfect way to wrap up TCR. I'm getting teary already.

I hope that, if Jon tackles the Sony/North Korea kerfuffle, he brings in the "Go Fuck Yourself" choir to tell off Kim Jong Pugsley.

Perhaps the whole, understated thing of his garage sale was deliberate. If Stephen made a big of it, the whole area would be crowded with people trying to find something, as well as a media circus covering it. It really IS the final Colbert Report tonight. :.....(

Lucky people that bought Stephen's TCR stuff cheap. Wish I knew about it and was there at the time. One more show to go. :...(

To those who have issue with Andrew Hawkins T-shirt and his words - as well as the people marching in the streets demanding justice against unnecessary brutality against the police - kindly plug your pea sized brains into the wall socket so that they can be recharged and used properly for one in your useless lives. I liked that Jon didn't say anything else after Hawkins speech. Preach it Jessica! Preach it to the clueless dildos at Fox News! Not that they'll learn anything from it, mind you.

I'm feeling something about a third Bush running for president. But it's coming from deep inside my stomach. And it's making me feel ill. I would have thought the "H" in David H. Koch stood for Horrible. Why couldn't Stephen have sold his show's naming rights to Captain Morgan's Black Spiced Rum? It goes down smooth with A&W Diet Root Beer.

Perfect computer graphic stuff of making Lindsey Graham look like a cold blooded reptile snatching a fly with his tongue over his condescending and hypocritical snark on Elizabeth Warren. Wouldn't surprise me the least if that lizard breath was the one sneaking in awful add ons to that bill. They really couldn't wait to do that Don't Jerk and Drive bit so that they could unleash their inner adolescents. Great seeing Aasif back on as well. Jon had great chemistry and rapport with Paul McCarthy. One wonders if Sir Paul talked with Ringo about what Jon is like before he went on.

OMG DXD526, I LOLed hard at those Prescott Pharmaceuticals slogans. I'm going to miss Cheating Death. I'm also going to miss the Sport Report (silent t's), mainly because it was originally created as a platform for one of my all time personal favourite Stephen creations, Steagle the Eagle Colbeagle. In August of 2006, he got us denizens of the Colbert Nation to go to the website of the Saginaw Spirit of the Ontario Hockey League and "votebomb" his name, in a contest, to name a new mascot of theirs. Realizing they had a golden opportunity fall into their lap, the Spirit organization worked with TCR to come up with a name and a small redesign of their mascot. Thus, Steagle the Eagle was born. Stephen spent the entire 2006/07 OHL season following the exploits of the Spirit and to talk smack at all their opponents, most of whom were cities, large and small, in my home province of Ontario. My biggest thrill was seeing Stephen laying the smack at my hometown of Sarnia, Ontario, home of the Sting ("Hey Sarnia, you suck, and so does Sting!" "I've just read The Chronicles of Sarnia: The Lion, The Witch, and The LOSER!"). Sarnia was also where my cousin played his entire OHL career in. But the best one was when Stephen went after Oshawa, Ontario when, just before Christmas, Saginaw went into Oshawa to play the Generals on Teddy Bear Toss night - a tradition in all Ontario, Quebec, and Western leagues - where the home crowd tosses teddy bears onto the ice after the home team scores its first goal and attendants gather up all the teddy bears so that they can be distributed to needy families for Christmas. Oshawa won that game 3-0. Stephen saw that as an attack on him because of his hatred of bears. So he tried to get Spirit fans to download copies of General Motors Canada annual report of 2006 - located in Oshawa - and toss them onto the ice when the Spirit score in their upcoming rematch against the Oshawa Generals in Saginaw. The mayor of Oshawa was not too pleased with Stephen's stunt and he issued a challenge to him. If Oshawa won their game against Saginaw, then Stephen would have to wear an Oshawa Generals jersey throughout one upcoming TCR episode. But if the Spirit won, then Oshawa would hold a Stephen Colbert Day on Stephen's birthday. Stephen accepted, but on the condition that they hold his day on the mayor's birthday, so that his birthday would be remembered forever as a day of humiliation for him. Soon Saginaw and Oshawa played and Saginaw won the rematch 5-4. The mayor held his end of the bet and Stephen Colbert Day soon happened. It got plenty of TV promotion on the Comedy Network. The Sport Report was also where Stephen decided to help raise funds for the United States speed skating team to go to the 2010 Winter Olympics in Vancouver, after their original sponsor declared bankruptcy. Stephen got them the funds and went with them to Vancouver to cheer them on and to do some tapings for TCR.

Are you taking notes Aaron Sorkin? That's how you finish something off, like Formidable Opponent with class. Convenient that the subject of the last FO was the same as the first. And a nice shot at Bill O'Reilly too.

Wow Dick Cheney. You've got a fuck of a nerve to use 9/11 to justify your acts of evil. Especially when there were thousands of U.S. men and women who died on the fields of Iraq and hundreds of thousands more who's lives are sorely fuck up from serving over there all because of the blatant lies you and your cronies sold to America. You deserve a violent end to your life for all the despicable acts you've committed, Dick Cheney you walking pile of shit you! Perhaps Tim Burton should invest in a comb and hairbrush.

Yeah, ain't that the truth! When I was in New York, three years ago for tapings to TCR and TDS, I took with me a scarf of my soccer supporters group, The Red Patch Boys, and managed to get it through an opening between a pole and the covering for the awning at both places. I took pictures of both of them and immediately made prints at the Walgreen's at Times Square. The one of the TCR awning, I showed the next day to Stephen at the Q&A session of the taping. He asked, in astonishment, how I managed to get my scarf up there, and who I supported from the scarf. I told him Toronto FC. He said "TORONTO?!! GET! OUT!!!" I hung my head in shame and tried to leave - all in jest, of course.

Pretty much, yep. That was so amazing that they did that computer recreation of Smaug to have be interviewed by Stephen. Making him a conservative makes all the more sense.

I still wish Will and Kate would have ate a New York style pizza, just to see how Jon would respond. Especially if they used a knife and fork to eat it. Sorry. Fresh out of fucks to give these Western kids who join ISIS. And WOW! Mick Foley took this Santa Claus thing a wee bit seriously. Jon was easily amused with Mick.

It's supposed to stand for Excellence In Broadcast. Which, considering the source, is the very definition of irony.

And one of Stephen's final guests has to be the obnoxiously Seth Rogan. Lovely. :P

Hey right wing assholes. You goddamn better face the truth about what your beloved administration did to these prisoners. You don't get to hide in your bubble and tell everyone America is awesome when they do shit like this.

Well then, at the end of the day, if you don't like how they conduct their business, then you're free to not go there. They're not telling you to stay away from their place because they feel they don't like you. If only the royal couple were spotted eating pizza in New York with a knife and fork. And yes, it does say a lot when someone like John McCain stands out as the voice of reason, in regards to the debate on torture. But when someone like McCain was on the receiving end of torture, it's rather difficult to dispute him. Hasan was definitely awesome in his second appearance as a TDS contributor. And Andrea Tantaros is most definitely not for saying America is awesome after the report on torture came out. Wow. North Korea doesn't know the joy of internet porn. I feel for them. Actually, Ms Feinstein, Wolf Blitzer is incapable of thinking

It would be discrimination if the restaurant charged people 15% MORE for NOT displaying any expression - religious or otherwise - for their meal. As it stands, it seems the only objection to all this is coming from that atheist dick.

This isn't a civil rights issue, because the people there aren't being denied service. So unless anybody has any kind of proof otherwise, then they're just being whinny douches, like that atheist ass was.

All entertainers for the final week of 2014. Rock is who I'll be looking forward to the most, with Sir Paul coming in at second.

Wee, to be fair, what the guy trying to get "eaten alive" showed was that these anacondas know how to handle the food their about to swallow whole, and should be feared and respected for that. You can make Jack Kingston interesting all you want Stephen, he's still a douche. I believe Stephen's response to doing the Hobbit photoshoot was "Do bears shit in the woods?"

How'd they get the cheese in the crust? Probably the same way they got the hummus up the ass. Yup, Jon was straight on outraged over the torture report released today. Nothing cutsey about it. So, if we were to walk into Mary's restaurant and thank the Klingon war god or whatever it is for the nutrient replenishment we were given, we'd get a 15% discount? Cool! Perhaps atheist douche can pull the needle out of his ass and have some lighthearted fun with it.

Holy shit, that Decree was awesome! President Obama can do a pretty good imitation of Stephen.

So you say Jon made one factual error on his piece last week, and you want to condemn him for what you perceive as a complete slander and attack at the entire U.S. police system? Go and fuck yourself hard Michael Ramos, you smug, arrogant attention whore. You and your new friends at Fox News like Brian Killmeade and Peter Johnson. If, God forbid, I live to be in my nineties, I hope I can be as alert and active as Norman Lear.

Aaron Sorkin really comes off as a massive douche for this. It just proves that he's completely tone deaf when it comes to understanding women, and that he believes his opinion on the subject, as well as others, is all that matters.