VioletNevermind

It’s clear that Chris has never been checked in his entire life. He is long overdue for a good take-down.

Oh, so Chris’s father and aunt are pieces of shit, too. Got it.

Whoo boy, Chris’s parents don’t like even the slightest hint of criticisms of their baby boy.

MAFS is giving Popeye (someone called him that last week and I loved it) a hilarious edit with his constant mentions of his home improvements. And I’m loving the “Nobody cares, work harder” t-shirt choice at his first meal with his new in-laws.

I suspect that Party Girl will definitely find ways to keep busy while her pilot husband (who was once married) is off flying.

Oh yes, that’s a table for two. I don’t like outside stuff inside! (By the way, I was once married. I just thought you all should know.)

Good Lord, military guy, SHUT. UP. Stop dropping that like a big, wet bag of mud into every conversation. It shouldn’t even come up! Let her tell her own parents.

I know from personal experience that they make a hell of a mess on the carpets when they’re stepped on multiple times.

Chris is lying through his lying teeth. And still Paige goes over to comfort him. He does not deserve her. This mofo has sex with her and then tells her that he isn’t attracted to her. Bless her heart, this is horrible to watch.

Pro tip for military guy: The more cringing and pausing you do before announcing what you refer to as “serious” news, the worse it will sound, even if it isn’t. You were just previously married, you don’t have a dead body in your basement. We hope. (And damn, poor Paige. I can feel my rage building!)

I love that Amber complimented Gary and Kristina for their “support.” When does she start to provide some support to anyone at all? They are raising her daughter for her while she continues to cycle through one inappropriate, borderline dangerous man after another. I thought Kristina’s comment about Gary sneaking out to see Amber in the middle of the night was . . . interesting. I’ve never totally liked Kristina -that knowing little look she has all the time bothers me- but she has a point. Still, the conversation at the end of the episode was very mature. Amber knows that Leah is better off with her dad and it does take a certain amount of clarity to realize that. Bentley absolutely did not suggest counseling with his dad on his own. He just didn’t. Maci is driving this bus all the way. Her constant comments like “I’ll be freaking stoked if your dad shows up” do not help. Bentley looks terribly somber all the time and says maybe three words per episode. I’m freshly enraged every time this monosyllabic preteen is forced to discuss his deeply personal, painful issues on my TV screen. I’d love to know what kind of bullshit therapist he’s seeing who thinks it’s totally okay for Bentley‘s presence on this show to continue, much less for him to discuss their sessions on the show. As for Rhine’s parents, my heart goes out to them. They have enabled the hell out of their son (and to be honest, it’s becoming increasingly clear to me that I have zero room to talk), but they clearly care so much. And nice hat, Rhine. Ugh. Mackenzie’s segments were basically an ad for whatever crap exercise program (oh, pardon me- her “career”) she’s pushing. She’s moving to Florida, so bon voyage. Yawn. One high point: She said “boyses.” Leah’s ears perked up! Ditto for Brianna’s overgrown manchild of a baby daddy, heading off to do yet another reality show. What a wonderful luxury to be able to jet off at the drop of a hat for 10 weeks to play. Double yawn. Catelynn, no one gives the slightest shit if you’re “following your passion” by learning how to microblade. As for opening a microblading business, if you couldn’t even commit to a vet tech program, trust and believe that you damn sure won’t be able to withdraw your head out of your ass long enough to execute all of the tasks associated with that. And that includes not only getting it off the ground, but keeping it going, which is arguably even harder. Sorry, but my passion is refusing to play along with overgrown kids’ fantasies.

SCRAPPY DOO!!!

This bitch is so embarrassing. I feel like I don’t even have to specify who I’m talking about.

It’s called 90-Day Fiancé, Mike. The whole premise is kind of about “rushing.” Also, this episode only has 10 minutes left, so . . .

“We’re looking for a smell.”

Let’s hope to the good Lord above that she isn’t pregnant. This douche is beyond not suitable father material.

I can smell those opening shots of Jovi and Yara’s scenes.

I don’t use this word much in my adult life, but Jovi is just an absolute dick. He would be eating my shoe at the door if I were her.

If this woman actually goes to Serbia, she has no one to blame but herself from this point forward.

Now I’m definitely reading it. And I’ve been looking for a book recommendation, too! ☺️

Mike, you’re into aliens, my man. Don’t give tree-hugging Natalie the side-eye.

I did not, but I may have to now! My mom talked me off of that ledge in the delivery room.

Good grief, Mike, if Natalie wants to get all Sephora’d up on your hike, who the hell cares?! These two make me tired.

Man, Hazel has one hell of a racket going on here. And no, Tarik, your daughter won’t know about it, but her friends, teachers, doctors, and daycare providers sure do now.

I’m relieved that my child-bearing years have sailed off on the good ship Middle Age because if I was still young, I would probably name my child Minty. (I came thisclose to naming my daughter Winter.)