Season Two General Discussion

[Beden]

Yep, the show is total bullshit--okay, bearshit. It's five minutes to winter and last night's episode had the entire family, give or take, spend the entire time hunting, shooting a single deer. A good start, sure, but that 100 pound deer isn't going to feed 9 people forever--or likely even for a week, especially if they're doing heavy manual labor. I get that they were woefully unprepared with food but don't they need that showpiece house at least started before the subsero tempts hit? Are they really going to spend the winter in a luxury 20X20 foot canvas tent and a 'hunters cabin' + the den under the fallen tree? Haven't they seen Life Below Zero? Good god--Sue Aikens could tell them about having a bear tear through the canvas wall in the middle of the night!

 

I keep thinking that those big ole bears are looking at them like a cartoon of the cat looking at a bird and seeing a steaming, cooked turkey dinner.

[Ridgerunner]

Bahahahahahahaha yes yes yes and Beden comes through with a save!!!!!! Uh huh, I thought the same thing! Plus, you ever seen the episode of bugs bunny? Where the two hobos are riding the train? And, they start looking like turkey legs to each other? Mmmmmmm hmmmmmmm!!! My fear doesn't lie that ol' Gabe is going to snap an arm off one of them no no! After, watching Bear enjoying his "fat melting in his mouth" pieces of deer "back rack," that frigger is waiting to lure daddy dearest to the nearest stream (just out of ear shot of camp), and those pyro fires Billy's always telling him NOT to make.....uh huh revenge + daddy + Bear = yummy!!!! Then, what? Well it's gonna look like Bill finally drew his "black bear just done what common sense, "SHOULD" have told you they do! EAT your ass." Next, while the whole family rushes to get rifles and go on a revenge hunt....camera pans over to Bear, with Ethiopia swelled belly, scratching it, smiling wickedly, and saying softly, "Extreme! I ate daddy EXREME!"

[Beden]

 

there's the freakin crab pot!!!! Squished and pooped on

This reminded me of an old cat I used to have who would always poop (just once) in the middle of the living room rug when the ex and I would come home from wherever after being away a week or so.

 

Making a statement? You betcha. Bears and cats; who knew?

[jbobchuck]

Gabe wants to do his sister bird girl - or whatever her name is. The bear kid is a junkie. I bet you he shoots up. The older brother freak is gonna kill the entire family one night. Good for him. End this bloodline!

[Shriekingeel]

I think the Saran Wrap house was intended as a message to those who haven't gotten it yet, that this show is not to be taken seriously.

[Ridgerunner]

Uh oh......next Friday.......do you see, what I see?! The girls are coming! I'm excited for the little fellers, damn me for saying it, I'm absolutely, ecstatic! But, let's not get ahead of ourselves. The one subject that will literally, keep me up this night, without the thought of a drop of sleep....CREEPY CRAWLIES? "It hissed at me!" OMG!!!! I'd just assume see Satan pushing my casket towards me, as to think of being woke from a sleep being HISSED at. Lord help me, I can take snakes, cause my daddy use to kill rattlesnakes and copperheads, what seemed to be every other day in the summer, growing up. But, the thoughts of a creepy spider lurking, waiting, and doing their maneuvering at night, just makes my skin crawl! And it's big enough to hiss? That means it knows it can dominate you! They not only can bite you, and make you so sick you pray for death, but they can put your trip off. I don't know why I hadn't thought of the spiders before? I guess I thought it was to cold for them. I guess I'll google what kind they have. Cause I have about 7 more hours to kill til daybreak. Lol!

[Ridgerunner]

I agree 100% bahahahahaha

With Shriekingeel.

[clod]

if the show is fake, is my snarking fake, too?    :)

 

glad to see someone wear a hat on the show.   might only be one person per episode, but it's a start.   I really hope going hatless in the rain is just being done for show purposes.  (better closeups)

 

I missed the first few minutes of the show.      did the hobbit house fill with water?

 

How do they dry their clothes in such a cool, humid, rainy environment?   they get wet a lot.

 

if they lose one log they can't build the house?   they have lots of trees where they are camping.

 

only 30 days till winter hits.   no house or cabin, no stored food, no large stack of dry firewood.  sound familiar?
last year they pretended like all of them were going to happily spend the winter in a 20x20 one room cabin. 

 

what are they going to barter for lumber this year?   and will it be delivered by boat?

 

glad to see the preview reveals that there IS a town nearby.

 

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

 

earlier episode comments..........

 

 

we are stalking bears.   be quiet.  spread out.  be quiet.    we are trying to scare the bears away.    by being quiet.   ???
oh, you see one kinda close.    so you whisper to the cameraman for 30 seconds before they show you loading the rifle.    no way.  :)     the loading scene HAD to be filmed before or after,     "for the show" .

 

that chainsaw did not look broken.   after all, it was "fixed" with just a screwdriver and wrench.     the bar and chain were probably just loose.

 

narrator says the family used to run a crab boat in the summers to make money.  but they throw a crab trap overboard with a float line that is too short.

later, it's evening, and you go out on a boat with no jackets, no lights, and no radio to look for that crab trap.   
would a light have helped find that thing you were looking for, maybe?
when you are finally found, sitting in your boat in the cool rain,  you are just wearing a tanktop t-shirt.

 

next show, two people go to check on a crab trap (the one that was damaged).   it wasn't in the water, so why do two people need to go?    

 

five people in a cluster walking around, deer hunting.   I've never seen that before.   makes it easier for the deer to spot them.    why is the guy such a bad shot?    that stuff is important.

so you get a deer.  and pop wants you go right back out and get another one.     what meat preservation technique is he going to use on the second one?

sturdy guy carries deer for two miles in the bush, does not appear tired, and jumps right in with the skinning work.   come on.    one of the others would have let him rest.   or maybe he didn't carry it two miles.

 

narrator said "the family" refuses to be apart for more than 24 hours.   I guess that's one way to keep the sons from spreading their wings.   cue big goodbye scene,   even though they are just going on two boats which are close enough that they can see each other.   

it reinforces that "no one can ever ever leave, ever"

 

most honest moment of the show so far:    back in the apartment, when the  oldest son is saying he wakes up every day  and wonders if he can keep doing this.     he then mentions the bush, but I really think he meant sleeping in a closet and sharing an apartment with 8 other people.      ........    soon after reaching the new homestead, he makes his own separate dwelling.

 

browntown  -  that's just wow.
 

[Beden]

I've said it before and I'll say it again--fakeity, fakeity fakefake.

 

As we've all been saying since forever--three minutes to an Alaskan winter and they have no real supplies, no real housing, no food supplies, no way to get and stay dry, no safety precautions against bears who'll be eating their little bear heads off fattening up in preparation for the winter hibernation. And that's their clothing? Leather jackets???  It was 9 degrees when I work up this morning; that's so cold it hurts if you aren't dressed for it and I'm not sopping wet--I know, I just took out the trash and brought in the newspaper. Have they never heard of down or thinsulate? And they're sleeping on the ground? How fucking inefficient is that heat wise? Get your sorry asses up off the ground, you inbred morons. And it's not even cold there yet, just starting to cool down. No root cellar to preserve food, no dried food, not even a 50 lb sack of potatoes that we've seen let along dry goods like rice or pasta for emergency meals or side dishes.

 

And next week they git them sum wimmen--gol-dang! How the hell did that happen? Mayhaps the film crew suggested that it might be fun for the young ladies to be on TV? 'Promised them some screen time and a ride home plus promised to chaperone the lasses against the lads hormones? I'm no expert, not up there, but from what I've heard there are many more men than women up in the bush and the ladies would have their pick of the local swains. Okay, maybe they were just bored...

 

I can't help it; I just love this damn trainwreck.

 

And where the hell are they getting all that fuel for those two boats? And they're paying for it...how? Gas ain't cheap for boats; I know. I grew up with big ass boats on an island in Canada and it cost my grandfather a small fortune to keep them fueled.

 

Oh, next week come quick!

[Fosca]

As the saying goes, for women in Alaska the odds are good but the goods are odd.

 

I'm also stunned at their clothing.  I mean, it all is cotton or leather (except for the older girl--Bird?--who wears sweaters), which will do absolutely nothing in rain, which is much of the precipitation in that part of Alaska.  Wool would be the best bet, since down doesn't work when wet and Thinsulate is probably too civilized for these yahoos, but I see almost none of that.  They look like a bunch of city kids playing with forts and such in the woods--I did that when I was a kid, but not in Alaska with winter coming and no other source of housing.

 

And next week, it's women!  I'm calling a non-musical version of "Seven Brides for Seven Brothers" here, as that's the only way I suspect they'd get women to that scenic bear pit (unless the females are Bush People Groupies, which would probably be the most fun of all watching them have to deal with the reality of what they've only seen on TV). 

[Ridgerunner]

Oh Clod dear, the hobbit house and leaking, wasn't so much the problem, as the fact, it intelled a spider so big it hissed at Matt, then "asked him to move out." Bahahahahaha! They bartered the better of the two boats, the "offspring," for the lumber. And watching some of the other Alaskan based shows....they kill and eat bear...Beden, lol help me here, since you're a native...people eat bear, yes? If so, why not throw down a few bear. And like you said, dry out and preserve. Bear jerky sounds good...if you like jerky. I mean heck I'll eat Winnie the Pooh if need be, besides going hungry. Oh my God, I love how Matt says, "you wanna smell like smoke or diesel." How many forms of death do you smell like if you need diesel fuel to cover your sent. Bahahahahahahaha this just keeps getting better and better!!!

[Ridgerunner]

I can't help it; I just love this damn trainwreck.

 

Oh, next week come quick!

Ditto my friend, DITTO!!!!!

[clod]

I will guess that they need to abide by hunting regulations like the rest of us.    seasons, limits, licenses, etc.

another guess:   those  deer 'innards'  they left behind could have been used as crab trap bait.     Discovery missed a chance there.   Easy topic and closeups and "bush people don't waste things"  commentary.

 

 

Oh, next week come quick!

 

:)

 

 

 They look like a bunch of city kids playing with forts and such in the woods--

 

good comparison!

 

 

Welcome to Hotel Browntown - you can check out any time you like, but you can never leave.

 

(Eagles song reference)

Edited February 1, 2015 by clod

[alwayzmovin2]

Ami says in her sing song voice. "Wakey, wakey.

I said, "Hands off snakey."

Hubby says, " Hands off your sisters."

We laughed and laughed.....

[Beden]

 

And next week, it's women!  I'm calling a non-musical version of "Seven Brides for Seven Brothers" here, as that's the only way I suspect they'd get women to that scenic bear pit (unless the females are Bush People Groupies, which would probably be the most fun of all watching them have to deal with the reality of what they've only seen on TV).

 

 

Beden, lol help me here, since you're a native...people eat bear, yes? If so, why not throw down a few bear. And like you said, dry

 

Maybe the wimmen can help with the barn raising though, sadly, I believe that the wonderful Michael Kidd (choreographer for 7 Brides) is no longer with us to make it a gosh darn fun ole time. Okay, I have to admit to loving that old 50's movie myself despite the incredible mindset of stealing the 'brides', holding them captive for the entire winter when they all get snowed in and then forcing 7 faux shotgun marriages for a happy ending. Terrific movie, not something I'd want to live in my real life.

 

And no, sadly I'm not up in Alaska though we do have bears around hereabouts; enough that sightings generate a shrug. Eastern Black bears--East Coast of the US currently. And yes, people do indeed eat the critters after a much protested annual and heavily regulated bear hunt every fall to cull the current population. I've never had the pleasure though I do have a friend who sometimes offers me venison from his deer hunting...I find it a bit gamey for my tastes and I'm not a hunter. My sympathies are generally with the local fauna. Of course, I also have access to real supermarkets.

 

 

I will guess that they need to abide by hunting regulations like the rest of us.    seasons, limits, licenses, etc.

another guess:   those  deer 'innards'  they left behind could have been used as crap trap bait.     Discovery missed a chance there.   Easy topic and closeups and "bush people don't waste things"  commentary.

Good point, Clod. I hadn't thought of that and, now that you mention it, it's interesting that the Browns didn't save the deer guts themselves to use as crab bait. And I've no idea what./when the bear hunting season is in Alaska nor what the permit situation is. Anyone know?

[crazycatchick]

I too can't stop watching! And I'm five minutes away from starting a kickstarter to get their teeth fixed--mainly the two girls. I also feel like they may need speech therapy, a possible visit from DCFS, and oh yeah, school. I'm assuming they have all been home schooled with some sort of religious theme given all the crosses and the good Lord talk.

The father bothers me to the point where it can be uncomfortable to watch. He has some strange cult leader like hold over this family. Whether it was staged or not, the whole crab pot thing when Gabe and Matt got "lost," the way he berated then was ridiculous. They are grown men and did something stupid. And they just stood there and took it like young children. Not to mention afterwards Gabe was almost in tears because he disappointed his father.

I feel like Bam will be the first one to crack and leave. Or go ape shit on his brothers. Or just crack.

One more thing, if they have always lived off the grid, where did they get all their jewelry and nail polish. Both girls had painted nails this past episode when helping the one brother with his weird Saran wrap shelter. I hope they cleaned that up and disposed of it properly and didn't just leave it out there.

[Beden]

I was wondering the same things about the education/schooling thing and also figure the kids were largely homeschooled. But since the whole family history seems fairly sketchy and suspect, god knows what the truth there is. I suspect that beyond the basic three R's, a lot went by the wayside as having no real value in 'the bush' or value as street smarts. I also haven't seen a single book pulled out even when they were stuck in that small apartment, crammed together, nor any real mention about anything anyone may have read from comics to newspapers to a used book from Goodwill. Maybe they got some bible reading or maybe they just got the parents version told around the campfire. Anyone have a clue here?

 

I've also wondered--and may well have simply missed--how the kids names came to be. Matthew is a standard name, may be a relative or some such, Gabe the same but the others--nicknames likely; Bear, Bam Bam. Those are the kind of names I'd give my pets. The girls names just seem to be your basic hippy-dippy stuff.

 

I'm also still agog that Mom opted to leave her badly needed dental work so the family could get to their new homestead...and no one said 'damn, women--that's just nuts. You know you mean the world to us and we'd be lost without you and the thought of you being in pain is too much for us to bear'. Nope, the sons were agog with admiration because mom is a real Alaskan woman, god bless her! Have you ever had an abscessed tooth? Hurts like hell and several at the same time would be constant and ongoing torture.

 

Morons. And I assume the girls picked up the nail polish before they left Ketchican (sic--sorry, my spelling sucks). And clearly the boys in the family have been raised to take care of the girls, at least to a degree. Other than basic survival and hunting, the family seems to be fairly traditional regarding division of labor. Mom seems to do most of the cooking, the girls (aside from hunting) seem to do the womanly chores and the chore rotation is reasonably tossed when building a house is happening, though the girls seem to do the much lighter work for the most part. The menfolk built the outhouse for the ladies.

[gaPeach]

My 10 year loves this show!  He wants to go camping now that he has seen it.  Of course camping is nothing to what they supposedly doing which is living that lifestyle (eye roll).  And I love rough camping and will take him so he can see what its like but I will only do it for a weekend and don't have to build any shelter or outhouse.

 

Nothing they do makes any sense.  As someone up thread pointed out the no hats in the pouring rain.  Huh?  They look so stupid just standing there talking in the rain without any type of rain gear.  Does living off the grid mean "living like idiots"?  And how do they get their clothes dry?  The dad seems to wear the same jacket/shirt all the time.  Does he ever wash it?  Or does he have 10 more just like it in his closet?  Or tree whatever the case may be.

[Ridgerunner]

I was wondering the same things about the education/schooling thing and also figure the kids were largely homeschooled. But since the whole family history seems fairly sketchy and suspect, god knows what the truth there is. I suspect that beyond the basic three R's, a lot went by the wayside as having no real value in 'the bush' or value as street smarts. I also haven't seen a single book pulled out even when they were stuck in that small apartment, crammed together, nor any real mention about anything anyone may have read from comics to newspapers to a used book from Goodwill. Maybe they got some bible reading or maybe they just got the parents version told around the campfire. Anyone have a clue here?

 

I've also wondered--and may well have simply missed--how the kids names came to be. Matthew is a standard name, may be a relative or some such, Gabe the same but the others--nicknames likely; Bear, Bam Bam. Those are the kind of names I'd give my pets. The girls names just seem to be your basic hippy-dippy stuff.

 

 

Morons. And I assume the girls picked up the nail polish before they left Ketchican (sic--sorry, my spelling sucks).

Ok Matt can read Egyptian calligraphy. Uh huh yep and enjoys it very much. Mom Ami, home schooled all the kids but as the smaller kids came to school age the older kids did more of the lessons with them than Ami. Example: Bird pretty much does Rainy's lessons with her. Mom doesn't. Each of them are extremely intelligent BOOK WISE, AND EDUCATION WISE THAT IS!!!! BAM BAM, (and that's his real name, not nickname, because his grandfather liked the character from the cartoon) is a history buff. He's also a "I wanna be an environmentalist savior....I was born 20 years to late cause I'm a hippie and can't stand the government," kind of guy. Bear (Solomon), (nicknamed because he fished like a bear, using nothing but his paws...lol his hands) loves geography. NOAH Dark Cloud (real name) is, you guessed it....a mid century lover. Edgar Allen Poe, Shakespeare, blah blah blah! SNOWBIRD (real name), would love to be a teacher or professor. Merry Christmas Katherine Raindrop, is the baby of the family. Named after her paternal grandmother, Katherine. The nail polishes and hair dye usually get put into boxes that food pantries hand out. I know this because, I had a friend from New York and she had 9 children and hit every pantry between our area, at the time, and hell. Seriously, she had it down to a science. But it wasn't uncommon, she said, to get make up, nail polishes, and hair dye in the food boxes.

I only have this info because any time I'm interested in something I research the crap out of it. I'm a geek that way.

[Ridgerunner]

Ok Matt can read Egyptian calligraphy. Uh huh yep and enjoys it very much. Mom Ami, home schooled all the kids but as the smaller kids came to school age the older kids did more of the lessons with them than Ami. Example: Bird pretty much does Rainy's lessons with her. Mom doesn't. Each of them are extremely intelligent BOOK WISE, AND EDUCATION WISE THAT IS!!!! BAM BAM, (and that's his real name, not nickname, because his grandfather liked the character from the cartoon) is a history buff. He's also a "I wanna be an environmentalist savior....I was born 20 years to late cause I'm a hippie and can't stand the government," kind of guy. Bear (Solomon), (nicknamed because he fished like a bear, using nothing but his paws...lol his hands) loves geography. NOAH Dark Cloud (real name) is, you guessed it....a mid century lover. Edgar Allen Poe, Shakespeare, blah blah blah! SNOWBIRD (real name), would love to be a teacher or professor. Merry Christmas Katherine Raindrop, is the baby of the family. Named after her paternal grandmother, Katherine. The nail polishes and hair dye usually get put into boxes that food pantries hand out. I know this because, I had a friend from New York and she had 9 children and hit every pantry between our area, at the time, and hell. Seriously, she had it down to a science. But it wasn't uncommon, she said, to get make up, nail polishes, and hair dye in the food boxes.

I only have this info because any time I'm interested in something I research the crap out of it. I'm a geek that way.

My grandmother swore to me I'd "catch my death, in that morning air," if I went to school with the least bit of dampness in my hair. How in the world they're still living...beats me. And like I said, Matt says, (in the upcoming episode) " if you've got a date, you need to smell like wood, smoke, or diesel." Now expose me to deisel for around 5 mins and I'm going to have a headache from hell. But, as a female searching for a suitor, uh....my date uses deisel as a form of aftershave, well.....it's odd to say the least. But, once again, I'll admit it....I do a countdown, every week, til Friday! Lord, help me, it's the truth! I also notice in the previews that NOAH is nowhere to be found. So he must be serious about the woman he met in Ketchakan....or however you spell it. Honorable kid? Maybe, we'll see.

Bahahahahaha I have room to talk about anyone's intellegents! Look how I butchered the last replies! Bahahahahaha

[crazycatchick]

I think Bam's real name is Joshua. Or Solomon and Bear's real name is Joshua. In one of the episodes Birdie called one of them Sol so I feel like those nicknames are not a real thing outside of TV.

I know Naked and Afraid is also kind of a sham, but I would love to see a crossover episode!

[brgjoe]

Well, I still wonder how many of those kids are actually REALLY his kids and not actors.  That one segment with Rainy (or Rain?) was beyond comical.  Where she essentially says, "Gee, Bears are cute and cuddly and wonderful and stuff.." But then attempts to learn how to use and fire a shotgun.  She struggled to even lift the thing, much less aim it and shoot.  It was like she had never even seen a gun before.  If this was even halfway real, she would have been a light snack for one of those bears by now.

 

And really I think they would all be toast before too much longer.  It's what like October when they were filming this thing.  And they just NOW are trying to put together structures to live in?  It has to be getting pretty cold there -- especially at night.  And they have no food stores to speak of (except for one deer...whoopie doo-like!) 

 

Now the women are coming for a visit...woo hoo!  Can only imagine what their reaction would be if this was real -- I'm sure they'd love to stay and live in that cult like atmosphere there with basically no food and decent shelter.

 

Like I said before...it's a train wreck.  But one so spectacular it's hard to turn away from.

[Beden]

 

It's what like October when they were filming this thing.  And they just NOW are trying to put together structures to live in?  It has to be getting pretty cold there -- especially at night.  And they have no food stores to speak of (except for one deer...whoopie doo-like!)

Which is something else which occurred to me; last season they were building the family one room cabin where they could all snuggle up in, it was frigging cold, snowing, below zero and the local neighbors showed up for a big ole barn raisin' to git it done before they all ended up frozen solid. Call me nutty, but if I'd almost had my ass handed to me for being caught out and risked serious death with winter coming once I'd have, oh-I don't know, tried to make sure i didn't make the same dumbass mistake again by starting the new homestead with winter five minutes away. Hell's belles, I live in the Northeast--it was 12 degrees when I woke up this morning, we had a foot of snow yesterday and my furnace seems to be ill (the furnace guy will be here soon, not to worry and I have a wood stove I'm about to fire up--no idiot I, thank you). Serious cold is life threatening. It can kill you, ask Napoleon or Hitler to tell you about that little problem they had fighting Russia way back when. Even if it doesn't kill you, it can also maim, make work impossible if your hands/feet are too cold or numb to use.

 

Maybe it would have been a good idea to, oh, say, start the damn homestead last May?

 

I may be way off base but I'm willing to believe that the kids are actually siblings. Maybe, anyway. And the youngest girl is just that; the relatively pampered baby of the family. I'll let that slide for now. And as to the nail polish and the various other 'treats' in the food bank boxes (or whatever assistance they scammed), yes, that's not uncommon. I work with a local food bank and people often add treats to their donations when they come in, knowing that if people really need the help (and the vast majority really do need the help) those small extras are the first things cut. Things like shampoo, pet food --the animal shelters are stuffed to the gills with pets whose owners simply can't afford to feed them and have to decide between the dog and the kids--school supplies, cosmetics and especially disposable diapers are sorely needed and appreciated. Yes, that's a hint.

 

Okay, off my rant. I would love to be a fly on the wall either with the family or with the film crew to see what's really going on up there. And, just another thought; they may be scam artists par excellance but they've got themselves a reality now in it's second year. I can't help but wonder what they're getting paid for this thing.

 

I just can't wait till the girls arrive! Friday can't come soon enough...

[Ridgerunner]

Bahahahahahahahahaha Beden I swear to God, I love reading your rants better than eating when I'm hungry!!!! I believe they scam stuff like that, too. You know when they get near a food bank or church, on their "once every 7 months, unless Rainy gets a piece of candy hung in a cavity" trips to town, they scam and pity party half the supplies that the banks & churches have! Plus how many idiots "in the lower 48" send the jackasses money, movies, supplies, etc. Alaskans talk about the "lower 48" like we have the plague, or like we MAKE then live in the conditions that they live in, but I bet they'll take every dime or freebie they can get from "the lower 48!" Heck, they will each get paid $1,880, this year just for living there. If they've lived there a calendar year. But, more power to them. I wouldn't live there if they gave me the whole state. I like some of the shows, but I swear the thoughts of 30 days of night smothers me to death. When they sell things like "happy lights" so you can absorb UV rays so you might feel "happier", it's a red light for me.

[clod]

a wikipedia article said "the bush" is a place that is not connected to the Alaskan road system or the ferry system.      so the first season location was not in the bush.    remember the large truck that drove up with a trailer-load of lumber.     anyone have a street address for that location?   I want to find it on a map, to see what is nearby.

 

 

btw, I didn't see a wikipedia page for this show.    :)      hint.   ;)

 

 

Maybe it would have been a good idea to, oh, say, start the damn homestead last May?

 

 

my guess is that Discovery waited to see the reaction to the first season (aired in May 2014).   then hurry!   film  some more episodes!

 

unless my timeline is  off by a year. 

[Ridgerunner]

Crazycatchick, yeppers Joshua Bam Bam Brown would be his name. Solomon is Bear. He's the only one except Matt that's got a normal name. Bear is just a nickname for him.

Clod, the location for the 1st season was in a subdivision. And less than a mile or so to the pizza place. I saw somewhere, when I was researching them, where it was. I'll try to find it again and let you know.

[clod]

are we taking bets on what the second-season excuse will be for NOT wintering in the bush?

 

 

my excuse prediction:         "the bears were shooting at us"

Edited February 3, 2015 by clod

[crazycatchick]

are we taking bets on what the second-season excuse will be for NOT wintering in the bush?

my excuse prediction:         "the bears were shooting at us"

 

My excuse prediction: "The bears were shooting at us and then they burned down our house!" 

 

I also agree that they act like the "lower 48" is a bad thing. Like one time Bear made a comment about how in Alaska they drink from streams and rivers and in the Lower 48 water comes out of a faucet. I highly doubt that no one in Alaska has running water in their houses or businesses. 

[Ridgerunner]

I'm going to predict: the storms, that'll hit. Like last weeks episode! Their area is known for the hurricane like winds, and constant rain.

I was raised poor. My parents had six of us (3 boys 3 girls), and we were in a mountain in Tennessee. For Petes sake that gives me a free "hillbilly with no raising" card, but my parents would always say, "we're poor, not heathens." I see small similarities to what they do in Alaska, but on all the other shows, they can food. They prepare. This way of life for us, just meant we were poor. We didn't have an outhouse, we had indoor plumbing folks. My momma canned food, had a garden and we had a well. Why do they not attempt a garden? Or have like a stockpile of mason jars? My mom and mammaw did. They were washed and stored, then when canning was to be done, they were brought out, and sterilized. And, again I'll say growing up the only wild meat I ate was pheasant. So, no My dad & brothers didn't shoot a lot of wild game. So to me that part of the show I don't know much about. But, I've smelled deer meat and....it smells "wild." And, my sisters and I, we're NEVER allowed to do hard labor, ever! My dad would have kicked my brothers' butts. And nobody is going to convince me that Ami did not like the conveinances of plenty of water, indoor plumbing, and a stove.

[Beden]

 

Maybe it would have been a good idea to, oh, say, start the damn homestead last May?

 

my guess is that Discovery waited to see the reaction to the first season (aired in May 2014).   then hurry!   film  some more episodes!

Damn, you may well be right, Clod. And just yesterday I also was sad to see no wikipedia page for out favorite Alaskan Bush Babies. That's just...wrong.

 

 

Beden I swear to God, I love reading your rants better than eating when I'm hungry!

Ah shucks, tain't nuttin, Ridgerunner, you ole hillbilly, you. Truth be told, much as I love this trainwreck, I enjoy the back and forth + the comments of the good folks on this site. It's just a hoot to stop by here. Oh, and the furnace is now fine--just needed a still under warranty relay switch. I even still have over a cord of seasoned oak for the wood stove out back. I swear, I have to thank the good lord and my friend Gary for bringing it over when he moved south a few months ago. Those good neighbors here in the wilds of the Northeast--it's what we rely on...

 

 

Alaskans talk about the "lower 48" like we have the plague, or like we MAKE then live in the conditions that they live in,

And yes, take those checks from whatever reality show company is sending them out. But it's not that we make them live cheek to jowl to bears, it's just that we're too damn weak kneed and lily livered to live the way the good lord intended us to. We wouldn't know how to get water from a stream, make a fallen tree into a shelter--despite the killer spiders, get anywhere via boats (...okay, maybe we could and even avoid sinking 2 in twenty minutes...I admit it, I used power boats for decades and never managed to sink even one. I feel so inadequate.)

 

 

the location for the 1st season was in a subdivision. And less than a mile or so to the pizza place.

Any guesses what the barter would be for a pizza? I mean a good one, the kind with pepperoni, maybe bacon crumbled on top and extra cheese? 3 salmon?

[Ridgerunner]

Bahahahahaha A large meat supreme pizza will cost you a cord of wood! 4x8x4 AND they only burn spruce. Lol! Glad you got your heat source fixed! Seriously like you said, cold weather can and will kill you! Gary rocks! Good friends, can't be bought. And they'll show up for no reason, at the times when you need them most. Cool beans!

[Bg311]

Bahahahahaha A large meat supreme pizza will cost you a cord of wood! 4x8x4 AND they only burn spruce. Lol! Glad you got your heat source fixed! Seriously like you said, cold weather can and will kill you! Gary rocks! Good friends, can't be bought. And they'll show up for no reason, at the times when you need them most. Cool beans!

Did anyone else notice that when gabe went to shoot that deer he didn't have his scoop clips open when he took the shot, how could u shoot a dear when ur scoop wasn't open all the way , no wonder he missed

[Bg311]

Did anyone else notice that when gabe went to shoot that deer he didn't have his scope clips open when he took the shot, how could u shoot a dear when ur scope wasn't open all the way , no wonder he missed

[Ridgerunner]

I didn't notice that, but I'll play it back and watch. (Yes I have every show recorded and saved in its own little folder......darn you Dish Hopper). But, they

allowed him to shoot because he saw it first....I don't know wht kept the others from shooting him in the ass. Cause I wanted too, and I'm not living like them!

[Beden]

 

Bahahahahaha A large meat supreme pizza will cost you a cord of wood! 4x8x4 AND they only burn spruce.

And that's another thing (thanks for reminding me, Ridgerunner you ole darlin', you). Last season when they were all doing that mega barter for the generator, including getting a cord of wood for whoever it was; yes, a cord is indeed 4X4X8 feet. It's also heavy unless you're burning balsa wood. My friend Gary delivered his much appreciated oak in his heavy duty pickup in two loads.The boys delivered the wood in that ancient station wagon. Really? How many trips did that take?

 

I'm also wondering how mom's teeth are doing out in the bush. How many abscesses did she have? How infected are her teeth? How much does that have to hurt? Talk about dumb and dumber.

[Ridgerunner]

I had never heard of a cord of wood, growing up. So, when I looked it up (cause I'm a geek that way), it surprised the crap out of me! No wonder Gabe looked at Matt like he was going to give him a throat chop.

And as for mom and teeth, the antibiotics the dentist gave her will only keep the infection at bay for a short amount of time. And if her teeth were in the shape the dentist said, they will swell back up in a short time. I mean any sign off infection, whether it be sinus infection, infection from a cut, ANY infection, is going to gather in those teeth. How the woman was packing with her face swelled up like that is beyond me. Screw that, "I'm just that tough" attitude, a bad tooth, or absessed tooth, can kill you. The infection can get in your blood stream, and BAM that's it. Mom's being drug out of the trapper shack by her ankles stiffer than a board...and not just cause it's 15 below zero. It's sad too, that everyone acts like, "she's so tough, she's the greatest", because that infection is nothing to screw with.

[clod]

if they decided to shoot a second season after seeing the reaction to the first season, that might explain why they needed to shoot a Christmas show in the summertime.

 

I still have a mental picture of them sitting on a log in the woods, saying how great this is.   in the rain, of course.    was there a campfire?   I wonder who started that campfire in the rain.

 

 

Last season when they were all doing that mega barter for the generator, including getting a cord of wood for whoever it was; yes, a cord is indeed 4X4X8 feet. It's also heavy unless you're burning balsa wood.

 

oh, you reminded me.    that trader got worked up when they said they had nothing to trade.   ok, he will take some firewood.  a certain type of wood.   they come back with a different type of wood.     suddenly  he is all cool with that, and actually gives them some windows for free , like for free.    how convenient.    wrong kind of wood, and here are some free windows.     and the generator they took home didn't look like the one in the junkyard.   it looked clean and new.    :)

Edited February 5, 2015 by clod

[Beden]

Different kinds of wood, not surprisingly, burn differently. Some burn hotter, some burn longer, some are really good for getting the fire started and so on. I use the seasoned maple from that poor maple destroyed during hurricane Sandy as my starter, works great. Gary's oak is what does the real burn, hot and lasts. No, I'm no expert, I just know what heats my house. And yeah--wet wood isn't known for being good for a fire. (Talk about, like, duh.) A cord is a decent amount of wood; I generally go through 2- 2 1/2 a winter and we get gol-darn cold in the Northeast. maybe not Alaska cold, but it's nippy. I also augment it with a oil burner furnace which I set at 55 then boost the heat with the wood stove. I also own most of the sweaters in North America and this time of year usually have 2 or 3 layers on. I also try to avoid sitting on a log in the woods while freezing rain pelts my empty head.

 

Yeah, the ever present rain. Haven't any of these twits ever heard of a oh, I dunno--a rain coat, hat, umbrella, tarp? I'm also fond of the idiot brothers seeing the skiff headed out to sea, jumped in to rescue it with their clothes on and so were wet for about a month, huddled by the fire.

 

 

and the generator they took home didn't look like the one in the junkyard.   it looked clean and new.

Yet another thing I was wondering about. It looked to me like it was fresh out of the shipping box, not like something which had been sitting in  a junkyard for a while. It couldn't be--oh no, it just couldn't-- be a plot plant from the production company? Yikes!

 

Why is it I get the feeling that the Browns are laughing, as they say, all the way to the bank?

[Ridgerunner]

Bahahahahaha Beden, you never let me down, ole buddy ole pal!!! In a previous comment I said NOAH wasn't in the testosterone pile up, in the upcoming episode, where they're having the girls run the obstacle course. But, I withdraw that comment. Cause....he's out there. I thought (cause I didn't see him in the previews they showed at first) that he may have started his two year courtship with the Ketchikan chic. Wrong"O".....how silly of me to assume such a thing. Men (who are trapped on a deserted island) + women, (who have a pulse and aren't semi kinfolk) = screw the Ketchikan chic!

[Ridgerunner]

And of course, here I sit watching the re-runs that play until the new episode comes on tonight. There's just this one little thing that is irritating the crap out of me. Why in the devil does someone not contain the dog? I'm an animal lover, don't get me wrong, but like when the skiff was drifting away, the dog was using Bear for a chew toy, AS USUAL! While he and Matt were stripping down to get the skiff that was floating "away!" Can, I don't know, someone, (namely Rainy, since she does absolutely nothing else) contain the dog? I get that the boy likes to act wild and extreme, and howl, but gee whiz, people! The boy couldn't even try out his new shoes he got on the Christmas episode, cause the pooch was latching on, to his coat arm. Is it just me?

[clod]

not just you.    I think the dog does not see him as a boss.  he needs to fix that with some firmness.
 
I just saw the first ten minutes of the show where they fetched the pilings.
 
{snark ON}
 
that bad boat got all fixed and stuff.   cool.   and it was delivered "by the seller".   double cool.    
free fix and free delivery.    huh.      weren't those two boats bought "as is"? 
 
they trade the good boat for house lumber.   I thought it was just for the pilings, but I think it was for house lumber.
 
see how really lucky it was that they had TWO boats?   it allowed them to barter one of them for lumber.    really really lucky.   otherwise they would have to barter some berries  or a partially tanned deer hide.    these particular bush people hate using money  (unless it is from the AK Permanent Fund),  so that would be out.
 
{snark OFF}

Edited February 6, 2015 by clod

[Ridgerunner]

OMG!!!!!! I just got out of the floor from rolling with laughter! I swear I did! This dog would commit me if he could sign his name. I just watched the piling getting stuck upright in the water....when Gabe goes to "pry" the wedged log "out!" I do believe ole Bam Bam might be a little gun shy on having stuff dropped on his head. I just keep rewinding it over and over. Poor Bam Bam

Edited February 7, 2015 by Ridgerunner

[Ridgerunner]

Clod: right ...how convienant, that the guy, that sold them the boats "as is" and seemed ecstatic that his wife would stop harping on him. But, that same wife would later ALLOW him to travel for an entire day's boat journey, to not only fix the boat for them, but fix AND travel yet another days ride, TO DELIVER IT TO THEM......

[Ridgerunner]

# I'm in reverse.......I love it!!!! # KENNY!!!!!! I'm just curious, but are the girls from Eskimo heritage? I'll look it up later, was just wondering. They were pretty girls. And well mannered.

Edited February 7, 2015 by Ridgerunner

[Beden]

 

I'm just curious, but are the girls from Eskimo heritage? I'll look it up later, was just wondering. They were pretty girls. And well mannered.

You ladies were up later than I was last night, commenting--starting the party with out me? Hey, I have feelings, y'know!

 

Yes, very pretty girls and accomplished as shown by the one girl shooting bull's eyes during that 'date', impressing the brothers. I was wondering how much they were paid by production to canoe to the island and then back home (after we were told it's an hour away by motorboat). Okay, in a small village the crop of local, non-related swains may well have been slight and new blood may have had some appeal. ..especially when they were wearing their 'cologne'. But (there's always a but, isn't there?) hadn't Bam and whichever other brother just spent a few hours chopping wood, clearly working up a sweat since they had their shirts off, I'm guessing they were a bit ripe.

 

I also loved mom and dad's reaction to the lasses arrival, already wondering when they would have grandbabies to help populate Browntown. I suspect Billy was ready to announce he's an ordained minister and who's got the rings? At least they were saying that each kid would eventually have their own house there.

 

Poor Cupcake. I keep dreading the episode where we learn that pup went after a bear and lost.

 

And as for that wreck of a boat not starting because of a dead battery and got started with a jump. Okay, fine, they got home--where are they going to get a jump on Bugfuck Island? I didn't notice them getting a new battery and, as anyone who lives in a cold climate knows, cold temps kill batteries. This is how AAA stays in business in winter, that and pulling car out of  snowdrifts.

 

And what the hell did they barter for those two or three or four large pizzas and soda's they were feasting on?  Maybe another cord of wood for the ovens???

[Passing Strange]

About the repaired boat, all the narration said was that the boat was fixed and the seller paid to have it delivered. There was nothing to indicate that the seller did these things himself, nor do we know who paid for the repairs.

 

I live in an area where deer hunting is sacred. Some small businesses close for the the first day of deer season, Thanksgiving dinner is planned around when the hunters will be home. I've seen my share of hunters, both local and imported, and never once have I seen one cover his face and body, especially behind the ears, with mud or paint to go deer hunting. Much be Chichagof Island deer are a particularly clever breed.

 

 

[Ridgerunner]

Bahahahahaha hahahahahaha "Bugfuck Island" this our new name for the book your gonna write hahahahaha awesome!!! Omg you're, a freakin peach Beden, I bet Billy is an ordained minister, and Ami a notary! Ok back to the book....yes if freakin Billy boy can write a book of his adventures, you can write a book about the humors of unfolding the truths of their tv show! With a truth only you can provide!!!

Yep I pondered on the pizza myself AND they took some home with them. Maybe to moms and pops.

[crazycatchick]

The pizza thing bothered me too! Maybe the crew paid for it? I also laughed when the boat didn't start and they were like we have no way of getting word to our parents. Um, yes you do! You are surrounded by cameras, probably a helicopter and probably the crew has their own boat. So either they could get word or you know, just take all of you back.

Bam reciting poetry made me cringe. As did Bear talking to those women and then in his talking heads talking about how awesome he is. And for some reason Ami talking about grand babies makes me cringe. Or maybe it's just the term "grand babies."

I do think Matt is the best looking one, if he got his teeth fixed, showered, changed clothes, got some speech therapy, and changed everything about his personality. Although he does seem fun. Noah needs to shut up and get over himself. With all the you mail a piece of your soul blah blah.

I fail to see how Gabe would be the first to get married. And of course none of them are actually ready to settle down. They don't have anywhere to settle or any means of providing for their wife or hypothetical children!

[clod]

 it had been so long since they were in town........

 

they took some pizza back home.   why didn't they take some groceries?

[Beden]

Jeez Louise, Clod--next thing you're going to be wondering why they didn't hit the local thrift store for down clothing or anything waterproof!

 

They live in the bush, dammit.