S04.E05: Do You Have Condoms?

[PrincessPurrsALot]

Quote

The Davises take Danielle on a weekend trip to see how she gels with the group; The Foleys tell Steve's kids about April; Sidian Jones visits Arielle in the Philippines; India Epps faces criticism about her lifestyle on her birthday.

Original air date 2022.07.07

[xwordfanatik]

An even bigger dumpster fire than I imagined.  So dear Sidian is going to finally meet the woman he's been "dating" online for months?  How long will he be able to keep it in his pants?  Or will she say uh-uh to all that?

I'm anxiously awaiting.

[Auntie Anxiety]

I just got a text from one of Nick’s wives. She said he’s putting the finishing touches on his “Deep Thoughts” podcast and will arrive on our screens in short order.

Happy Independence Day, everyone. 🎆🎇 Hope you were all careful about playing with fireworks!

[Pepper Mostly]

Hello my fellow snarkers! I just want you all to know that I rely on you all for that sisterly relationship. And relationships are difficult. Communication is key. Jealous feelings are so hard but its important that we overcome them. 

[Auntie Anxiety]

If Brenda found a brother husband, all her problems would be solved.

Uh oh, Seeking Sister Wife and Coffee Tawk crossover!

Lecture about “communication” in 3....2.....1...

[Pepper Mostly]

So, no pedicure? 

"We hang out collectively"?? She already sounds like Nick. You know. Deep. 

"We really want to hear about your date with Nick."? Um, just how much detail do you ladies want? 

Here we go. Jealousy. It is the single greatest fault that any woman must overcome. 

[Auntie Anxiety]

How big did they say that house was? 

[Pepper Mostly]

They are going to need a fucking HUGE bed. The cost of the bedding alone would give me pause.

[Auntie Anxiety]

The sister wife on the right looks like she could be Tonia Harding’s daughter.

[Pepper Mostly]

1 minute ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

How big did they say that house was? 

They're going to break through a wall to make room for the huge bed.

[Auntie Anxiety]

Maybe Nick has these women under some sort of spell? Because there is no explanation......

[Pepper Mostly]

God, the thing that frosts my ass the most, I swear, is the couch talk segments, with the man perched between his two "wives" with a hand on each one's knee. With a big fatuous shit eating grin on his stupid face. Gah.

[Auntie Anxiety]

Guess the kids are too young for the axe throwing venue? Oh, wrong show.

[Pepper Mostly]

Love the quaint use of the word "courting". Yes, you are so proper, you fucking horndog sleaze.

1 minute ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

Guess the kids are too young for the axe throwing venue? Oh, wrong show.

Isn't horseback riding getting to be a thing? 

[Auntie Anxiety]

“Outside influence.” As in, rationale thought?

[Pepper Mostly]

"Negative outside influence"??? Sweet tap dancing Jesus. 

1 minute ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

“Outside influence.” As in, rationale thought?

Yes, society is so narrow minded. Kids should understand that their super manly dad needs to bang more than one woman. 

[Auntie Anxiety]

Putting the kids through a fucking mess like this is emotional abuse, in my opinion. And extremely, outrageously selfish.

[Pepper Mostly]

@Auntie Anxiety, looks like you and I are the only ones at the snark party! Who's going to eat all this dip??

[Auntie Anxiety]

Everyone passed out after a long weekend of celebrations?

[Pepper Mostly]

As long as you're here, I'm good! 

CHAZITY. Help me. 

[Auntie Anxiety]

Did that say Chazity? That’s an interesting name.

[Pepper Mostly]

OK, Chazity may have a crazy name but she just nailed it. None of these women feel that they deserve a whole person. 

[Auntie Anxiety]

Chazity’s hair is perfect for the July 4th theme.

[Pepper Mostly]

Is this woman on drugs? She sounds like she's sleepwalking. "IamsogladmysistercametovisitIamsohappyshehasalwayssupportedme" all in a monotone. 

[judylo]

Ooh the nerd now.

[Pepper Mostly]

Sidian, the poor man's Keith Raniere. Tosha actually makes me laugh hysterically, she's so moony and adoring. 

[Auntie Anxiety]

2 minutes ago, Pepper Mostly said:

Is this woman on drugs? She sounds like she's sleepwalking. "IamsogladmysistercametovisitIamsohappyshehasalwayssupportedme" all in a monotone. 

I know. I’m trying to follow on the closed captioning and I am having trouble multitasking because it’s so fast and garbled.

Squeaky Fromm is going to be doing a jig the minute Insipidian leaves.

[Pepper Mostly]

"Gain her as a potential sister wife". Tosha almost slipped there and said "convert". Hee.

[judylo]

“Her and I.”

[Auntie Anxiety]

I’m sorry, but did anyone mention exactly what Insipidian does for money? 

[Pepper Mostly]

Oh, right. SHE'S going to lose hope. Hahahaha.

Just now, Auntie Anxiety said:

I’m sorry, but did anyone mention exactly what Insipidian does for money? 

My money's on blogging and selling stupid shit on Etsy. 

[judylo]

Most of them are so unattractive! I do think Steve is kinda cute. Not enough to put up with him, though.

[Auntie Anxiety]

1 minute ago, judylo said:

Most of them are so unattractive! I do think Steve is kinda cute. Not enough to put up with him, though.

When I look at Steve, all I see is Tim Tebow, without the Heisman Trophy and the money.

Nick should paint the house while he’s sitting around doing nothing thinking.

[Pepper Mostly]

Nick is so fucking gross. Now he rides in the back being chauffeured by his womenfolk. 

How long till one of the wives backhands her? 

[Auntie Anxiety]

Maybe Danielle is doing this to include it in her memoirs, because I can see no other reason.

[Pepper Mostly]

You know, maybe if you know the poor girl isn't comfortable, contribute to the conversation and try to put her at ease?

[Auntie Anxiety]

I need a shower after watching this hot mess.

[judylo]

Nick the pimp.

[Pepper Mostly]

Oh yes, tell everyone about "how it goes with Danielle". Yecch.

[Auntie Anxiety]

Marcus needs to have a bevy of women around him to help him forget his height issues.

[Pepper Mostly]

Marcus is the sleaziest sleaze in this whole clusterfuck of sleazes. 

[Auntie Anxiety]

So no other men at the party? Yeah, that seems about right.

[Pepper Mostly]

Marcus has no male friends. Not one. No obligatory brother/cousin/childhood friend/gym buddy? None of these guys do. 

MARCUS GOES OUT AND FISHES. 

Help me, I'm dead.

[Auntie Anxiety]

Marcus’ constituents in Ohio(?) are now second guessing their votes for him.

[Twopper]

Okay, I haven’t seen the earlier episodes this season, and I am really confused with these new peeps.  So are there 2 Danielle’s? Once with Garrick and formerly Roberta and this new Danielle?  Sorry to see Obsidian is back.  

[Auntie Anxiety]

The one with Garrick is usually referred to as Dannniellllle or some variation thereof. But yes.

[Maybeitsme]

Just back from the fireworks,  playing catch up 

Do any of these women have any self worth? And I wonder how these men can pick up on that trait...

[Pepper Mostly]

1 minute ago, Maybeitsme said:

Just back from the fireworks,  playing catch up 

Do any of these women have any self worth? And I wonder how these men can pick up on that trait...

None. And they've all talked themselves into believing that one third of some creepy sleazy horndog is all they deserve. 

I cannot believe that the stupid family Chantel is still on the air. 

And I don't believe for one minute that those kids ever called Brenda "mom". 

[Auntie Anxiety]

Those noodles look too dente.

[Pepper Mostly]

They eat soup with a fork?

Of all the idiotic things I've seen on this show, this has me gobsmacked.