electraheartnataly

Nolan: When you need to find Amanda she disappears into thin air. When you want her to go away she keeps popping up like the homicidal stripper version of Whack-a-Mole.

''Just go home and try not to do anything revengey." or something very similar. LOVE Nolan. :D

haha ''with all due respect..<insert something the other person will definately find disrespectful>" i have used this before but never expect to be taken seriously when i do, it's the tv version of 'no offense or anything but <insert something the other person will definately find offensive>".

Only on tv when someone hears some very surprising OMG!-kind of news do they drop whatever they are holding. Most often it will be a glass or for e.g. 'You're the father of the baby' cue person receiving news dropping a whole stack of plates and them smashing on the floor. This always makes me laugh when this happens on tv, when people hear something that shocks them or catches them off guard in real life i'm pretty sure they don't lose the grip of their hands. Similarly someone always feels the need to deliver OMG-kind of news when the other person has their mouth full and they spew their food or drink everywhere.

don't judge me but i thought forte was pronounced ''fortay''?? i have never heard anyone pronounce forte any different! once i know the correct way though i can smugly correct people as if i knew along ;)

Or the current alcoholic detective who is still Amazing at his job. Wife may have left him e.t.c but the drinking only seems to make him better at his job or doesn't affect the job whatsoever. Cos in real life if a cop was drunk all the time they'd really be The Best Cop Ever though (but just a bit cranky) and wouldn't lose their job.

Ah i guess kids and sometimes adults can be exceptionally dumb in real life too your photo printing evidence being a prime example. Just as well they are dumb so don't get away with things as much, i suppose 'criminal masterminds' are more often on tv than in real life then! Still thinking about corridors (i'll try to stop that when i can) there's always a school bully in a teen show who shoves someone over and their books go everywhere. Loads of bullying takes place in corridors and classrooms aswell on tv. While be know bullying does happen in schools in real life, it just seems like teachers on tv ignore it a lot more or must be stupid to not notice shouting abuse in class/pushing people in corridors e.t.c. Hope that isn't the case in real life as of course that's very sad.

"Screw you guys, I'm Going Home!" Cartman from South Park. Can't help pulling that out just as a general goodbye when work is finished on friday etc.

Yes as i recall there definately wasn't enough time or space to stand around chatting in the corridor outside the lockers. Which brings me to... Only on tv do people try to hide incriminating evidence in their locker at school. I know i've seen it often enough, and have seen it literally being evidence they were involved in a murder, or else it's drugs, stolen items, to a less serious degree evidence they cheated on an exam e.t.c... Yes is would be hard to surrepticiously stash a bloody knife in your locker given the busy corridors, but why hide anything in there in the first place? Stashing something in a locked cabinet in your own home is one thing, but don't these people realize they aren't the ONLY ones with the keys to their school locker? The school has these keys too, so why is person-already-under-suspicion-for-some-sort-of-crime surprised when the janitor opens their locker to reveal stashed items in front of the police/entire school??

The mother Grace Rinato in Denial is a piece of work. She murdered her child (IIRC two of them, or was it one??) because 'she couldn't deal with the crying' etc and her other daughter Claire who did everything she could to love and protect that child is then accused of the murder. Grace is totally happy for her daughter Claire to go to prison for murder and Claire now being a heroin addict isn't a credible witness or whatever, i love Fin in this episode and when he hugs her at the end! ah the days when SVU made you feel something real and was powerful not-too-over-the-top emotional drama...so yeah It's only cos the grandmother comes forward and admits that her daughter Grace was the murderer that saves Claire.

This! They just hate them don't they! I was watching an early SVU episode and IAB come to visit the squad room.. our main character goes 'you can look in my desk but sorry i don't think i have any cheese in there for you' haha and being a very early episode it's not like they had any reason to hate 'the rat squad' so much. surely Our cops being Good cops they would be on the same side being against police corruption and all?? Anyway my point is here, in real life we have a general rule (don't know if it's written somewhere or unwritten but a rule all the same) that even when we really dislike a colleague or someone we have to work alongside from a different field, we have to be civil. that doesn't apply to tv, cops make sure Internal Affairs KNOW how much they hate them and the same with anyone else in the workplace they don't like they are outright rude and express their contempt towards them.. and NEVER get called on it. i know i would be told off for bitching about people i work with to their face, and probably be sacked if i continued to not be civil to them.. on tv they can say and do whatever they want to colleages and never get told off by superiors.

And no prisons are ever inspected for anything like that on tv, they're just allowed to get on with whatever awfullness is going on. Oh silly me, they probably are inspected but the superiors/govener or whoever will inevitably be corrupt too. Haven't seen Sons of Anarchy but tv prisons are still proving my point then and getting far worse it would seem! It always makes me laugh when the suspect-who-is-about-to run is approached by the police, say in their work place or on the street or wherever, they knock over a massive table, pots n pans or street stand, to get in the cops way. they do this so often on tv without a thought to how suspicious it makes them look to everybody. and i never understood why when they are approached by cops in their own neighborhood/work place they end up running to the end of a dead-end alley. you'd think they'd know the area well enough to run somewhere less stupid.

In any given prison on TV the large majority of the guards will be completely corrupt. There might be just one corrections officer who doesn't take bribes/bully or assault inmates/frame the inmates for something or other but the rest of the C.O's will be basically pretty horrible people breaking the law themselves and the inmates on the whole will be far nicer than them.

Nate's Dad on Gossip Girl made him Take the wrap literally heh pun totally intended, his mum found drugs that were actually his dad's and he said they must be his son's and they were all ready to send poor Nateybear off to rehab..then his dad gets charged with embezzlement and is all ready to hold his family ransom in another country to avoid extradition or some convoluted reason. though as spartan girl said, the worst of the worst parents that i can think of are some Law & Order SVU parents!

Oh right, thanks! we also wanted to be prom queens and cheerleaders but they don't exist in schools here so that was an Only on US TV thing for me hehe.

Genuinely wondering if this is an Only on TV thing, when the bell goes in high school everyone immediately gets up and leaves the class. I know we had to wait for the teacher to dismiss us regardless of the bell and she/he could actually make us stay sitting until finished, noone was allowed to just leave their desk. I remember me and my friends saying we wished we could just walk straight out saved by the bell style 'like they do in America' but i actually don't even know if that's the case now lol.

I'd imagine in some rural areas it would be fine and not that uncommon as you say to have the door unlocked and a pretty nice sense of community and welcoming hospitality to neighbours :) i've just seen it many times on TV shows set in NYC, off the top of my head Dan in Gossip Girl had his annoying friend Vanessa walk into his Brooklyn loft all the time, but any of the hundreds of Law and Order SVU episodes would tell me door unlocked in a big city is not the best idea. admitedly i live in the UK but don't know anyone in London who's home i'd be able to open the door myself and wander into lol it is a very different scenario with busy streets, not knowing many of your neighbours e.t.c to somewhere rural though of course!

This. This is also a great example of TV Trying to Have it Both Ways. On the one hand, we're supposed to believe that people often leave their doors unlocked and act like it's completely normal when friends walk in, sometimes just wander straight into their living room/bedroom (and this never makes them jump). On the Other Hand, in police dramas when they are analysing a crime scene and someone says 'No sign of forced entry', how come noone ever replies with 'yes but hang on a minute, this could be one of the many people who leaves their door unlocked.. so even if it was a stranger there wouldn't be sign of forced entry!' ?? if i'm meant to believe it's normal to leave doors unlocked, so if it WAS someone walking in to commit a crime the person wouldn't even be alert to someone 'creeping up on them' as they are so used to hearing people wander in to their house, then i would expect characters to take this into consideration in crime shows. i don't know, TV what are ya like!

Only on tv when two people have an affair, i.e with one/both of them cheating on their significant others to embark on said affair, will they inevitably absolutely always be found out. It will either be their respective spouse(s) that catch them in the act, or they'll find evidence of said affair (99% of the time that will be a credit card reciept of a hotel booking/resturant for two. because if you don't want your spouse to find out about your affair you still wouldn't DREAM of just, i dunno, Throwing Away any credit card reciepts!!) or someone else will find out and inform their spouse(s). I suppose we have some tv moral code thing here that says they need to be exposed for doing the dirty, however (sadly and cynically) in real life i'm pretty sure some people do cheat and have affairs and are just careful and noone ever finds out.

Yep, similarly and also down to contrived writing to make Our cops be the Heros who are the only ones ever who Give A Damn, only on TV will officers from other precincts always dismiss Our cops case, be incredibly insensitive regarding the victim, EVERYone else except the shows main characters will say 'she's lying!' or 'noo he's a decent family man there's no way he's the killer!' Ahh why am i just realizing my fave shows are cliches with a side order of chiche's ahh :S Love this thread btw it's opened my eyes and made me Lol.

Only on tv, when police officers are investigating a crime and have a police officer from a different unit/federal agent come and investigate the same case with them, will they automatically be enraged at this, usually rude/cagey/condescending and undermine the just introduced other cop/fbi agent's input on the case. even if they eventually work the case together and start 'playing nice', only on tv will they never just be like ''oh hey, nice to meet you, hope you can help us with this. considering this is a federal case or homicide and isn't a crime for us anyway because we're (lets just say for arguments sake) the Special Victims Unit!! so should be handing the case over to you anyway rather than behave like a petulant child who doesn't like to share- 'This is MY case! get your own!' but would actually appreciate your help to solve the crime'' lol.

Haha ganesh at adding salt! Yes, only on tv do they never suggest adding any one of a million herbs or spices..It has to be salt. Because that will transform the flavor, not just make it, you know.. saltier. Only on TV do teens go out on a regular basis to clubs and bars, often the most exclusive ones, and never get asked for ID. I'm looking at you Gossip Girl.

Ahh maybe now i can stop subjecting people in 'real life' to my thoughts on tv couples, some of which they have never even heard of :D Completely agree with those who have Sheldon and Amy as a least favourite. I thought they were brilliant at first, before Amy became so desperate to do the Coitus with him, and while she was still on the receiving end of his typical Sheldon oblivious rudeness, the same as all his friends, it hadn't yet escalated into he's just treating her badly and actually hurting her because she expects so much more as his proper girlfriend. I think Sheldon is totally believable as asexual and that is so unique and rare for a tv character, so it's uncomfy viewing on both there parts here! I love Law and Order SVU and did see plenty of chemistry between Liv and Elliot so they would be one of my favourite Platonic best-friends type couples, but seen as i believe this thread is talking about romantic pairings i would have hated them being an actual couple, and although it never happened, in season 15 Liv does this whole monolgue to someone, clearly talking about Elliot where she says (paraphrasing) 'all those nights sitting in the car and you just want him to turn around and realise you're the woman he loves, who he would leave his wife for...but it was never gunna happen'. Just uggghhh. I hated this as it made Liv come across so pathetic! I would have believed Elliot doing a monolgue like 'all those nights sitting in the car and i wanted Liv to turn around and realise i was the man for her.. for her to leave Alex for me...but she's not into men so it was never gunna happen.' (ha yes Cabenson is my should have but never did and obviously the show never ever in a million years would have.)

have to wait until next week for the finale to air here in the UK! de-lurking finally after reading everything on TWoP r.e Bates Motel. I think Norma/Vera Farmiga owns this show, i actually can't help but adore her character. Her meltdowns are always so believable as even when she's in a 'good mood' you can just tell there's something bubbling under the surface and she's always THIS close to cracking. at the same time i just love her for trying to keep it all together and after everything she's been through tries so hard to make a good life for them, she basically just wants a peaceful life and can't get away from all the draaama! just think the actress is amazing love her character. and the fact she looks absolutely lovely in every episode considering she often wears things my grandmother wouldn't have been caught dead in is a shallow bonus , hee.

thought i'd say hello to you MorbidPet, de-lurking here and i made it my mission to read practically everything on the SVU archives on TWoP and i definately remember seeing your comments on there!! so yes, getting withdrawel symptoms already from the awesomeness that were the comments on there..anyway i love SVU, need to finally come somewhere and talk about it!!