Joimiaroxeu

...said the world. Less than 24 hours later. Called it. And not only did Victoria not pull away, she threw a hand up on his neck and went all in. I never understood that show. It always seemed like they were making the rules up as they went along. Portland's version of The Bling Ring?

Heh, that's putting it mildly. You'd think Viagra Poster Boy had never had sex before. Or, hadn't been married how many times and already gone through how many women? He's probably hoping his giddy behavior gets back to Leslie because she'll put the clues together in about two seconds and be all jellus. Right, because a small town in WI is destined to become the Milan of the Midwest. Especially with Chelsea's daring "headed straight for the remainders rack" designs to lead the way. That was exactly my fear. Kelly will just bounce from one d-bag to another. Oh yeah, that's what every woman wants to hear: "I'm just gonna let you do me until my real girlfriend is awake and alert enough to do me herself. 'Cause you're cheaper than having to pay an actual prostitute to do me." Not me. I do not at all get the Lily and Kelly friendship. I guess it's supposed to make Lily seem a little older and Kelly seem a little younger but every time I see them doing their galpal thing it just seems forced. Ugh, I'm not liking Jack so much right now. Trying to use his younger brother's sloppy seconds as a temporary bedwarmer isn't a good look for him.

When you get pregnant do you have to get a checkup every day or is Victoria subconsciously trying to run into Stitch? Since the Newmans practically built the hospital they probably get all their medical care comped (or expect to). Given how many extremely wealthy people there are in GC it's a wonder they don't have concierge medical service. Then the doctor would come to their house for basic checkups and nonemergency care. Ian is such a great shite-stirrer. He just moves about town dropping these little bombs in everybody's relationships. I don't think I've ever seen a character quite like him. Except he wouldn't have to hack in. Since he's a doctor on staff he probably has regular access. The thing that might trip him up is doing it without leaving evidence. If she's not his patient he has no valid reason to be looking at her records so he'd have some 'splainin to do to a compliance auditor. Yes they do!

For making her an independently wealthy woman from all of their divorce settlements. Yes, and I like that color on her too. It's funny how much better Nikki starts looking when she's away from Victor. Heh. Zach Slater on the old AMC used to have a line he'd always toss out in moments like these: "It's who I am, it's what I do." Deal with it or get to steppin'. Gah, who made Chelsea the Morality Police? This is not a good look for her. After the virtual tongue bath Nikki gave him, Victor probably had to pull over and have a smoke on the way home. Good grief. Sharon getting hypnotized could be comedy gold. "Sharon, when I count back from ten, on zero you'll awake and start clucking like chicken." Colin got locked in a room once before, during the Genevieve story. Dusting off old scripts, writers?

She would do Nick right on top of Jack's nearly lifeless body. Newman trumps Abbott every day of the week. "Chelsea, I cannot be part of your trying to climb up my derriere. There's no room anyway since Stitch already took up residence." Chelsea and Stitch should form a support group called Busybodies R Us. Literally. Takes after his mom it seems. Yeah, he'll wait about five minutes. Dollars to donuts he'll be back there tomorrow to check up on her. I guess he must have sensed that his baby is on board.

Just quoting this because it's brilliant. You'd think a town big enough to have an international airport and a handful of billionaires would also have at least a couple of options from the better hotel chains. Surely there's some space between the GCAC and that beds-by-the-hour place Tyler and Abby were at last week. Also, doesn't the Abbott estate have a guest house or a pool house? When I was watching I actually said out loud, "She knows he knocked her up, fool." I think the amount of time Stitch spends at work dealing with his romantic life is very controversial too. He must have quite the rep among the GCMC female staff. Avery knew before she answered that it was Ian calling. Why does she have his name in her phone's contacts list? I don't why Jack felt like he had to clarify anything. According to Dictionary.com: meeting [mee-ting] noun 1.the act of coming together Sounds like that's exactly what he and Kelly had in mind for the evening. Guess Jack forgot to send his comatose fiancee the break-up text I recommended last week. Whatever, Summer needs to not be c-blocking her dad. Is Jack supposed to abstain indefinitely? So step off you nosy broad. Did you listen when people tried to warn you away from Adam? Can't you buy prenatal vitamins at the drug store? They're probably on the same aisle as the pregnancy tests and the condoms that don't work. Brava! I enjoy your recaps much more than the show itself.

I don't get why the men on this show are so okay with having their women fight their battles for them. Brooke confronted Karen and Katie to get Bill his company back and co-custody of the kid. Katie marched over to FC and gave Eric what for because he made Ridge and Brooke co-VPs. Quinn takes on everybody on behalf of Wyatt, Brooke kept Eric from moving Rick out of the CEO position. Caroline will clearly cut a bitch who dares to do anything she thinks is wrong to her husband. I guess it's supposed to be good to see strong women but it's like the men have to be weakened to compensate.

Dylan, Billy, and Victor are all vexed and perplexed by secrets. They should form a support group. Heh, maybe someone should take him to the dog park and let him run some of that yapping energy off. I loved the way that fake website was called Internet Search. I guess that's so no one confuses it with Easter Egg Hunt or Search for Tomorrow. Ew. Hello, Room Service? Do you have any industrial strength earplugs? No? How about a fire hose? Any day now Chloe will show up wearing a coat made out of 101 Dalmation pelts. So, wonder what the odds are that at some point Stitch is going to use the hospital's medical records system to find out what's going on with Victoria. Because he's just a chivalrous guy who looks out for the health of the ladies he gets preg--er, dates.

Not sure I agree with that. Yeah, Hilary eventually caved but Neil pursued her in a way which had him repeatedly violating her personal space and lording his taller height and larger physical presence over her. I'm not going to be surprised if he gets his panties in a twist about her talking to Devon (or some other guy) and starts causing problems for her at work. Neil had been reading some of Lily's girly magazines and he saw an article titled, "The Best Way to Get Over Your Lost Love? Get Under a New One." Neil took the advice but sort of got his prepositions confused. Really, I couldn't believe she had the nerve to be getting snarky about Sharon. I guess in her mind the romantic concept of One True Love only applies to her and Dylan. Wonder how long it'll take for Victor to decide that Sharon must have tried to kill Phyllis in order to maintain the big secret. Geez, can't that guy get a hobby? Like running a major international company?

Floved Sharon's outfit today. Very retro chic. Neil says, "Because I've seen a sign of Hilary that you haven't." Ew. So anyways, I'm guessing there are security cameras in the GCAC hallways and as the owner, Devon can access them. DUN, DUN, DUUUNNNN! Cover your eyes, Devon! Hmmm, in a potential streetfight between Abby and Mariah, I think I'd have to go with Mariah as the winner. She's ratchet enough to take off her earrings first and then proceed to pull Abby's hair extensions out. Meanwhile, Abby'd probably be too worried about breaking one of her manicured nails and would call her attorney to deal with it. But not to worry, Tyler knows how to stop an argument between his wimmens: step in between them all shiny and shirtless. Had to google those mixing bowls Avery was using because I thought that particular shade of blue was trademarked by Tiffany's. Guess not. Nah, there's not enough Viagra or Cialis in the universe to make that happen. There's a complicated system of pulleys and levers involved in getting anything like that going in his pants. It was developed by a secret division inside Newman Enterprises.

Yeah, especially since the poor boy doesn't have job. Where oh where will he ever get the money to pay his bills? But really, does Noah have access to his trust fund yet? The last thing I remember is that he couldn't get it until he was 25. That's why he had to go to work for Nick at the bar and live in a crappy apartment. Creepy McCreepster Victor has no shame. Now he's trying to figure out how to creep on a woman in a coma. Well then, we should all just start calling him Heisenberg. He is the one who knocks! A day or so ago it was Victor who might have BPD. Is there a theme developing here? That was slick the way Sharon got the phone away from Faith so she'd forget about calling grandpa Victor to brag about her soccer goal. For her next magical trick she'll pull a quarter out of Faith's ear. With Stitch's baby. Taking all bets, cash on the barrelhead. So Summer's the one he decided to cull from the herd? Why not Abby? They're both airheads. Yeah, Chloe will probably kidnap little Johnny next. Because Billy and Victoria are getting a new baby while she doesn't have even one. Wah, wah, wah. It's so not fair! Straitjacket? No! It doesn't match this cute outfit I got at Lauren's new boutique. Friends and family discount. Don't I look hot? Mr. DeMille, I'm ready now. NO WIRE COATHANGERS EVER!!!!

I'd say the iridescent blue dress she had on yesterday was one of them. Fug. Ly. I don't recall, did Sister Mary Abigail ever lecture Billy about breaking his wedding vows? So what did Stitch do, park in a red zone? Put his recyling in the wrong container? File his taxes late? Geez, writers, get on with it. The way they're trying to build up the suspense, whatever it turns out to be is almost guaranteed to be a let down. Smooth move by Tyler. Abby probably won't sign his prenup and he'll have open reign on her money after they're married. With that "surprise" ending, I see getting blackmailed in his future and he's gonna need the funds. Billy is pathetic. If he believes so strongly in his and Victoria's endless love, why does he have to keep whining to Stitch? Did anyone try to scan that QR code on Victoria's pregnancy kit box? For a prop it sure was realistic. Heh, wasn't that a Steve Miller song? No kidding, it looked like the No Tell Motel. "We welcome all one-hour quickies and stalkers who look like rich people's dead children." Are these people in high school because this sounds like some GCHS dramaz involving a cheerleader, a couple of jocks from the football team, and her muscular but slightly slow half-brother who the team lets serve as their water boy.

Didn't Dave Chapelle already cover some of this territory with the Clayton Bigsby character? I don't think the writers are trying to do that. Aaron Mcgruder's stuff--for the most part--seemed to have an underlying intelligent message. What's being shown now, IMO, is base sitcom drivel which simply goes for cheap laughs. This Boondocks looks on the surface like the original show but as best as I can tell it's no more than a poorly re-constructed imitation which has the minor advantage of being able to wear some of the original's clothing.

I'm not sure Devon picked up on Neil and Hilary's behavior and knows they slept together. I think the scene left it sort of ambiguous but maybe it was just BJ's failure to convey the disgust Devon must have been feeling. It's probably going to lead to his dropping her like a hot rock once he's gotten enough of his rocks off. In Neil's "don't hate the playa, hate the game" mind, Hilary is now tainted goods because she didn't have enough willpower to withstand his pressure. I still see a sexual harassment complaint in Neil's future but Hilary's not helping her case by being such a googly-eyed fool. Seriously, I think he has a near pathological disregard for normal interpersonal boundaries. And the sad thing is, Nick, Nikki, and Victoria are so used to it that it doesn't really bother them for more than a little while. The other people who also get hurt by Victor's schemes to PROTECTMYFAMILYEVENTHOUGHMYPROTECTIONENDSUPHURTINGTHEMWORSE? Collateral damage.

I think maybe we're supposed to believe that Hilary was screaming. Because Shiny Hairless Manboobs Neil is just that good. /vomit Guess we now know where that money went, huh? It seems Ian and FauxCassie perhaps targeted Victor and the Newmans et al from the jump. Once the truth comes out that'll probably end up being Victor's Path to forgiveness from Nick.

That's the way I interpreted it. Which means she's really just stringing Wyatt along. IMO, he should have told her he wasn't going to get played like that and don't come back crying to him when Liam breaks her heart again. IKR? Either she was or she wasn't, there's no "almost". I guess every time Hope's period is late that means she's almost pregnant? Liam must have gone to one of those schools with the "abstinence only" curriculum because the boy is clueless about basic human sexuality.

There's a new trailer: http://youtu.be/Shn1mPejr_4 I'm looking forward to this. I read the book and from the trailer it appears to be a fairly faithful (no pun intended) adaptation. It might help that the book's author is involved in the production of the show.

I just saw the actress who played Bianca on the reboot AMC in a McDonald's commercial. That's big time. I also heard that she played an underaged hooker on the Dallas reboot just this past season but apparently she was so tarted up that I didn't recognize her.

It's odd to me how Devon is so intimidated by Hilary. It's not as if she's a foot taller than him like somebody esme, uh, else we know. IKR? Is that crap supposed to be romantic? I hope this isn't leading to some 50 shades b.s. like they did on B&B. Sigh, Jack always goes into 5th gear right off the bat. He'll probably be proposing to Kelly in a month or so. Exactly. Neil should know better. Hah! Except I'm not convinced the good doctor actually exists. That name couldn't sound more fake. And maybe guilt doesn't keep Jack warm in his bed at night, nahmtalkinbout? Like about six inches, nahmtalkinbout? (Meh, it's probably more like three.) Aim lower. Much lower.

I think Liam's had Hope to himself plenty already, through a gazillion engagements, at least one completed wedding, and a brief not-legal-in-the-US marriage. Yep. What I don't understand is why Hope would go along with the "you can't sleep with Wyatt" rule. Liam basically just told her she has to break up with Wyatt. Maybe Hope should stop playing games with these boys and letting them treat her like an object. (And I'm not Team Wyatt either. He knew she was on the rebound and he knew Liam would never be out of Hope's life. There's been a countdown clock running the whole time, I think.)

Oh, no, I don't want to see that. Sharon get mindfcuked enough by the Newmans without bringing a professional manipulator like Ian into her life. Sharon could use a break, IMO.

The whole time I was watching them I was wondering how you break up with somebody in a coma. Is there an etiquette rule for that? I'm thinking a simple text should suffice. Cue the arrival of the notorious Aussie cattle mafia in GC. Anybody taking bets on how long it'll be before the twins are kidnapped? Next up, more Lily screeching and Cane chest-beating.

Poor Connor is like, "Aw geez, my mom is kissing that high school kid who tried to kill my dad? I know how to put a stop to this nonsense!" Man, if there was ever someone who needed a punch in the throat it was Neil right then and there. Leslie should have offered him a Midol. Yeah, right up until the moment he summons Tyler to his office to sign a prenup. Because he will not let some young punk steal his daughter's money in a divorce settlement. YAGOTTHAT!? Hope on the way home he dropped by CVS for a jumbo pack of extra strength Midol. He sure seemed to be needing it. LOL. And then they started braiding each other's hair and giggling about boys. She's like software Terms and Conditions. Nobody reads Leslie. Let the church say amen.

At that point she wasn't sleeping with both of them though, was she? When Ally gets wind of Hope seeing two guys at the same time, she's going to go supernova and probably liken it to Hope having a threeway. As much as I hate to see Oliver trying seduce a naive, virginal, and emotionally fragile girl, he has definitely had a calming influence on Ally. Maybe he should get extra pay to serve as her "handler" (or to be more blunt, her gigolo). Then Hope can be free to audition Liam and Wyatt simultaneously for the future position of husband, co-parent, and lover without Ally going apeshite. Meanwhile, does Liam actually have a job? It seems like he spends most of his time roaming the halls of FC trying to interfere in Hope's life. And I just love the way Hope, Liam, and Wyatt can take off at any time to fly to Hawaii or Aspen, or take an impromptu road trip up the California coast. Who does their work when they just up and disappear to deal with their ever-so-important romantic problems?

That's so it'll make sense when Tyler asks Noah to be his best man. Who else is he gonna ask, Neil or Devon? Neil is an obvious non-starter and I don't think Tyler and Devon are exactly drinking buddies either. I still don't understand why Chelsea doesn't have a peephole. She just swings open the door to be surprised by whoever's standing there. One of them mentioned the doorman but I guess he's just there to accept packages or something. What's to keep crazypants Chloe from showing up with a gun aimed at her? Ugh, I hated that entire scene. It's bad enough to watch two women arguing over a man but to do it in front of the man is just vomit-inducing. (And I don't like when the genders are reversed either; looking at you, B&B). And she said it right in front of his date. Since when is Ashley that desperate? Stitch was a straight-up pimp. He not only had two women arguing in public over him at his job, his bottom bitch came to pick him up and brought him food which she paid for. All he was out of was a change of clothes and he's probably going to get laid right in that empty patient's room. Work it, Stitch.