TheRealT

All of this. Roxanne and Briana seem to have this idea that if they can just figure out the right strategy, they can somehow force Luis to be a good and caring father. And that, in the meantime, they have to force Stella to want and enjoy attention from her sperm donor dad. That's a big part of the Operation Make Luis Be a Good Dad strategy. If only Stella and Luis would comply, everything would be great! It sucks for Stella. If they had never mentioned Luis coming to the lunch, she would have just been excited to see Devoin and if Luis showed up and it wasn't totally awkward with him, that would have been a bonus. But Briana needed drama for her storyline on her reality show, so she had to do the whole, "Do you want your daddy to come? Ok, I'll invite him..." I hate Briana. Yeah. Javi seriously needs his head examined if he's even thinking about getting back together with Kail. The whole scene seemed very fake to me. This entire episode struck me as odd in terms of most of the scenes being obviously staged to provide (phony) exposition. It was all very, "So, Dad, how do you feel about Leah's new boyfriend?" "Oh, I think he's great, son." Weird.

I wonder who picked the slogans for these t-shirts? I'm sure none of this was Amber's idea; probably someone(s) came to her and gassed her up about how her fans would love to buy merch from her (all funded by her, of course). So did those people convince her that "Fighter for Life" would be a good slogan for a known domestic abuser who is currently under court supervision? Are they trolling her? Amber's "brand" is "Crazy, Violent, Lazy Reality Star" or, most charitably, "Openly Mentally Ill." How does either of those translate to shirts that even remotely imply violence? Doesn't another one say "I'll Portwood Your Ass" or something? They have to be trolling her, right?

ITA. Amber has real and serious mental illnesses and that sucks, but... she's also just a horrible person. I believe that her assholeish tendencies are exacerbated by her mental illnesses, but... she's still an asshole. Lots of people dealing with mental illness(es) are kindhearted, sweet, compassionate, empathetic people. Amber is none of those things and she seems to want to use her diagnoses as a "Get Out of Jail Free" card that means she never has to really take responsibility for her behavior/choices. She feels like everyone, including her kids, needs to "understand" that she's mentally ill and, therefore, it's unfair and unkind to judge her for anything she does or even to feel bad because of her actions. She abandoned Leah emotionally and practically and physically, but she wants Gary/her psychiatrist/Leah's potential therapist to "explain" to Leah that Leah shouldn't feel bad about that or blame Amber because it's "not Amber's fault" because she's mentally ill. It doesn't even occur to her, at all, that maybe she should think/care about Leah's feelings. Like, that's not even a blip on her radar. The best she can muster is, "I get why Leah feels bad, but I don't think she understands why I'm such a shitty mom. Someone needs to explain that to her so she'll stop hassling me." She thinks that if Leah "understood" her mental illnesses, she'd get that she should perform a close relationship on Amber's terms and stop feeling bad because Amber is so self-involved and malicious. So when Leah saw a video of Amber maligning the woman who takes care of her every day while Amber wallows in her mental illnesses and focuses on her bfs, Leah would feel like she had to defend and protect Poor Amber and call Kristina a homewrecking slut who sabotaged her relationship with her "real mom," etc., etc. Amber would love that. She'd be happier if Leah were a troubled teen, acting out and giving Gary and Kristina hell because she blamed them for hurting Poor Amber. Deep down (well, actually, not that deep down, just below the surface level), Amber doesn't give a fuck about anyone else, including her kids. But she wants that to be ok because- SHE'S MENTALLY ILL!!! If she deserves a pass for all the horrible shit she does because of her mental illnesses, don't OriginalRecipe!Matt, nuMatt, and all of the other people who have allegedly done her wrong deserve the same consideration? Or does she win the Blameless Olympics because she's the most mentally ill? Gary arguably has some kind of emotional issues that led him to being in an abusive relationship with Amber, so why does he have to put up with all of her bullshit on top of taking 100% responsibility for Leah, along with all of the other stuff he has to do (while Amber has no responsibilities at all)? Kristina probably has emotional issues; Leah certainly has emotional issues, but none of that matters in comparison to Poor Amber, the World's Most Important Mental Patient, who makes 6 figures self-medicating, lounging on her bed/couch and spewing vitriol at anyone she thinks isn't being sufficiently accommodating to her.

ITA. Amber's mental illnesses are obviously real. What she doesn't seem to understand is that others have the right to protect themselves and their kids from her abusive, hurtful behavior. They're not being "mean" or "ignorant" or "insensitive." If someone is a homicidal maniac, that's a "mental illness," but it doesn't mean that people have to let her kill them or be totally fine with her killing people and just do whatever the killer wants to support, protect, and enable her while she goes on killing people. Amber doesn't understand that other parents have a hard time getting out of bed to visit their kids because of their mental (or physical) illnesses. Or even just the stresses of being a functional adult. Depending on the circumstances, many of them get out of bed anyway because they want to do the best they can for their kids. And Amber only has to visit with her kids, it's not like she's actually taking care of them. She's "too sick" to see her kids once a week for a few hours for weeks and weeks at a time and she doesn't even call to talk to the kid or try to come by another time. When anyone calls her out, she gets defensive and self-pitying, insisting that everyone, including her kids, should "understand" that she's mentally ill, which justifies all of her behavior. Same thing when she posts nasty rants about Leah's real mom online, embarrassing and hurting Leah. Same thing when she chases James and his dad with a machete. Same when she intentionally tries to hurt Leah and ruin her 12th birthday by blowing her off at the last minute (again). Etc., etc. Amber isn't even sorry for all the horrible shit she does; she doesn't even pretend to be. She actually blames everyone else and paints herself as a victim. Even on her best day, she has ZERO gratitude toward Kristina and Gary for taking care of her kid and she's actually pissed at Kristina for it. She seriously believes that that makes sense and that Kristina has somehow wronged her by being a great stepmom to Leah (while Amber was in jail/more focused on herself or her latest bf). Like, she seriously expects other people to see it like that too, even Leah. How can anyone have a healthy relationship with someone like that? Amber isn't just benignly mentally ill. She's extremely toxic and abusive and she seems to have no empathy, even for her own kids (who have been through a lot, mostly because of Amber). It's really impressive that Leah is able to recognize that and set some boundaries with Amber since Gary and Kristina have been so codependent and enabling with Amber up to this point (K seems to be done now). I hope Leah is able to get help in understanding that choosing not to endlessly indulge Amber is appropriate and healthy and find a way to make peace with her birth mom being in her life on a limited basis (if at all). I think it's unrealistic to think that Amber will someday get it together to the point where Leah will be able to have a "normal" close relationship with her in a healthy way.

Yeah. Amber is a horrible "mental health advocate" because she's not managing her mental health issues well. At all. With all due sensitivity and consideration, she just isn't. She doesn't have any kind of custody of either of her kids (rightfully, for the kids' well-being); she keeps getting in trouble with the law for acting out violently; she posts destructive (to herself and her kids), "crazy" rants on SM; she doesn't seem to understand why her daughter has been hurt/alienated by her behavior; etc., etc. Amber is a mess. There are mentally ill people who are holding down jobs, being good parents, helping others, raising awareness about managing mental illness, planting flowers in the park, whatever. Amber isn't doing any of that stuff. Personally, I don't even necessarily buy her story that she's getting As and Bs in her two classes at Purdue Global (but good for her if she is). Amber's idea of "raising awareness" about mental illness is convincing everyone in her life and the general public that people who can claim "mental illness" should be exempt from any judgment or scrutiny of their actions. "Oh, you slapped me/chased me with a machete while I was holding our baby?-- No problem! You're mentally ill! That makes it all ok! My bad! I'm sorry! No really, I should have understood that you have an uncontrollable need to abuse me and our child. I apologize for being such an insensitive asshole. Are you ok, Amber? Is there anything I can do for you (besides taking 100% responsibility for caring for our child since you obviously can't because-- Hey, MENTAL ILLNESS-- but you're still an awesome mom!) Again, I'm so sorry! I'm such an asshole and you're awesome!" She's literally delusional.

I noticed that too. Good for Kristina being over Amber and her bullshit. I think Gary's heart is in the right place with trying to find a way to positively engage Amber in Leah's/their lives, but... it's Amber. She's fucked up. There's nothing her psychiatrist can explain to make it ok. She seriously hopes that therapy for Leah would entail a mental health professional telling Leah that she's got Amber all wrong and that Amber is a great mom who's always been there for her, but Amber has some mental health issues that are totally beyond her control. Those issues somehow make Amber prioritize men over her daughter, blow off visits, and be totally self-involved. In all fairness, the self-involvement probably is due to Amber's mental illnesses and that's kind of the root cause of the other behaviors. BUT "I'm an asshole because I'm mentally ill, so everyone just has to accept it and excuse all of my assholeish behavior" doesn't really work, especially with a child. Amber's idea of "resolving things" is to make Leah/Gary/Kristina understand that Amber is Mentally Ill, so whatever she does is ok and their role is to unconditionally support and kowtow to her. Gary's idea is to somehow make Amber a functional adult/parent who gives a fuck about her daughter. They'll never be on the same page. Gary needs to focus on supporting Leah in understanding and accepting that her birth mother will never care about her the way she should and moving forward positively however she can. That's a very tall order which leaves little/no bandwidth for trying to make Amber feel better about being an asshole. Do people who already have two kids really go on "babymoons"? It was so weird hearing Cate go on about how they won't have any time for themselves after the baby comes when-- they already have two young kids. Obviously, those kids will get less attention when there's a newborn in the house, so how about having a "parentingmoon" during which they give the kids extra attention in anticipation of them having to adjust to their baby sister? No? Too child-focused? I can't imagine how stressful it is for two people who have no jobs to contemplate having to care for their infant (who isn't even a boy!). My heart goes out to them. Speaking of two parents, zero jobs, I am riveted by the ongoing saga of How Will Maci and Taylor Organize Picking Up and Dropping Off Their Three Kids for School and Activities? Hopefully, MTV will do a spinoff show focusing on that exclusively. I didn't even understand what Maci's alleged beef was. Does she feel like it's a parenting failure if anyone but her or Taylor picks the kids up from school? Why? People with jobs have to rely on others picking up/dropping off their kids all the time. Are they all substandard parents? What damage does it do to kids to have a non-parent pick them up from school? Is it greater than the damage that having their privacy sold on MTV does? I hate Maci.

I thought it was "Ryder Raging Regardless," but I admit that I have no idea. I guess the upside of the RRR name is that it doesn't matter what order the words go in? Taking the "meaningless phrase" thing to a new level...

Yeah. These kids have basically lived The Truman Show since they were born. It must be weird for them reaching adolescence and starting to put together how warped that is, especially for TM kids like Leah whose parents/experiences are so fucked up. I was just trying to think of a TM kid whose parents/experience aren't fucked up and I couldn't come up with anyone except maybe Ryder, who is still pretty young and, hopefully, the show will be over by the time she's old enough to really understand what's going on.

I FFed most of Cheyenne's segments, so I only saw the part with her sister saying she was pregnant and was happy her kids would be back in CA with her. I was confused about the timeline with her moving to DC to be with her son's dad and what their relationship status (I assumed he was the dad) is. So that wasn't explained on the show? Sadly for Leah, I think there's pretty much no hope for Amber to be an even ok parent. She actually held it together pretty well (for her) with Leah snarking on her to her face and not buying into the Poor Amber Show (which, Go, Leah!, not just for giving Amber her just desserts, but also for being true to herself and not falling for Amber's (and even, to some extent, Gary's) gaslighting). Amber is hopelessly narcissistic and just generally fucked up. A big part of her problem with Leah (and probably with James in the future) is that, deep down, she doesn't really give a fuck. I believe that she cares about Leah on a superficial (for an egg donor/gestational carrier) level, but if Leah challenges her (even as a child who's obviously hurt by Amber's neglect) she's quick to go to "Fuck Leah." Amber is already framing Leah speaking up about how she feels about Amber being such an objectively shitty mom as Leah being bratty and unreasonable while Amber is being generous and patient, though (justifiably) annoyed, in response. Uh, no. The bullshit with her complaining about having wasted her time (basically) driving 40 minutes to see her daughter was nauseating. Especially since Amber has no job or other responsibilities besides having her son visit for a few hours once a week (which she was hoping to fob off on Gary and Kristina like she did before when James was visiting and she took him over there every time, sometimes leaving him there while she went somewhere else). Oh, sorry, I forgot about all the hours she spends studying to maintain her A-B average at Purdue Global University.

I had the exact same thoughts about Maci's storylines being totally fake/staged. Last week when Bentley "spontaneously" asked her to pick him up from school was so obviously fake. Are we to believe that all this time, for months, she has just refused to pick up/drop off B at school without explanation and that B just randomly asked her to pick him up from school one day, totally not seeming pressed or concerned, and she filled him in on the PTSD she's been suffering with for months and he was just like, "Oh, ok."? There are lots of scenes with Taylor that are obviously staged/scripted (by Maci). I think her only real scenes are with the little kids and even then, her prompts/reactions are fake/planned. I hate Maci.

And what made it all so much worse for me was that I felt like C & T were doing it for a storyline on the show. Neither of them strikes me as thoughtful enough for it to occur to them to try to change their child's behavior except to eliminate behaviors that are annoying for C & T. The binky is the opposite, a simple thing that keeps the kid out of their hair sometimes. I don't see why either of them would even think to "wean" Vaeda from the binky. It's not like they read about in a parenting magazine or heard about it from a friend in a moms group. I think the only rationale they expressed was Ty saying, "Who wants their kid using a binky when they're [some age]?!" [in that super cool and funny way he has. why hasn't he been swooped up to star in a sitcom yet?!] I think they were trying to come up with some kind of "Vaeda's going to be a big sister now. How will that affect her?" storyline (like Nova's last week) and the binky thing seemed like a good idea. Since they're morons and horrible parents, it was the best they could come up with and they didn't even think to look up any information about how to support your child in making that transition. I'm sure they thought the storyline would make them relatable to "normal" parents, but, like all their attempts to appear "normal," just-- no. It's gotten to the point where all of the OGs + Mackenzie have resorted to a strategy of using their kids' challenges and life events as content so they can maintain their own privacy. It's disgusting. Cheyenne's Party of the Week storylines are annoying and boring, but at least she's not exploiting her kids (as much).

Bentley's Orange Mullet is literally the most interesting aspect of Maci's story, yet they haven't addressed it at all. I would much rather hear about BOM- whose idea was it? how and when was it executed? what kind of reaction does it get?- than listen to Maci drone on about her alleged PTSD. Why did Cate and Ty have a third child? Well, I know why, but every one of their segments screams "PLEASE DON'T HAVE ANY MORE KIDS!!!" It seems like they barely interact with either of the kids they have, though they do chat with Nova a bit more now that she's older. Vaeda, like Nova when she was younger, always seems to be running around screaming in the background while her parents melt into the couch glued to their phones.

Yeah, it's really gotten to the level of Beyond Ridiculous at this point. All of the actual OGs' kids are too old to be involved in this mess; Mackenzie's story is just depressing; and Cheyenne was never a teen mom and her kids aren't even in the same age range as the OGs. If they wanted to bring in a random "teen mom," why didn't they get someone around the same age as Amber/Cate/Maci who had a kid as a teen? They could have found someone who ended up getting some type of education and career (to contrast with the OGs). That would have been somewhat interesting and still in keeping with the original intent of the show. Even a more developed and successful (apart from MTV) teen mom in her late 20s could have interesting stories related to having a child who's much older than people would think based on her career/lifestyle; having a partner who isn't her kid's biodad; dealing with her kid's biodad; etc. Not that I'm advocating for more adolescents to have their privacy sold on MTV, but someone like that could have worked. Or some very trainwrecky woman who had her first child as a teen and had something else interesting going on. I just don't see what Cheyenne or Mackenzie add to the show. Cheyenne is just boring and annoying and Mackenzie is boring and annoying and sad. Maci's segments have literally come to featuring her struggles with going to all of her kids' sports activities. No, seriously. How could anyone imagine that anyone gives a fuck about that? Cate and Ty are featuring Cate's fake career fucking up people's eyebrows and Ty going on about how he wants a son and he's tripping on ketamine for therapy. Amber's story at least provides some level of entertainment marveling at how fucked up she is and cheering Leah on in calling her out (and they didn't even include that this week).

I think Amber is envious of the image that Gary and Kristina have as functional, even good, parents, adults, and community members. She would love it if people saw her as that type of person rather than a nasty, lazy, crazy drug addict. However, I don't believe for one second that when she sees IG posts of Kristina taking Leah to the dentist, or even making cupcakes or something, she thinks, "I wish I could do that stuff with Leah. Even going to a dr.'s appointment would be an opportunity to spend time with her and I want her to know she can count on me to take care of her." She's enraged because she would like to post images of herself doing that stuff on SM. If Kristina offered to let Amber take pics of herself with Leah in the parking lot of the dentist's office, Amber would be more than happy to come to do that for 10 minutes, then leave.

That's the best I've seen Cate looking in years.