The Ringo Kidd

A very succinct and comprehensive explanation of what a fraud and grifter Teddy Mellencamp really is for people who don’t know. Remember this the next time she starts lecturing about morality and accountability.

I don’t know why everyone is dissing Teddy’s dress at dinner. It is the best seller in the Dick Butkus collection.

It was Century 21 which has a big store downtown and another in 86th Street in Brooklyn. All of these clothes are from a Chinese website where they can be purchased at half the price. They just slapped Sonja’s label on them and shipped them out. That is why they could fill the store. As an added bonus they were made by Uighur slave labor. Something that doesn’t seem to bother anyone.

I heard Dorinda was bitten by a great white shark up in Maine last week. He spit her out. Didn’t like the taste. She was bitter.

Did I hear Sonja talk about her “Impossible Pussy?” I remember Richard Kiley singing about in 1965!

Look at what she made them do!

That is only callous if you think Rinna has an ounce of humanity in her entire heinous being!

That’s my new thing at the breakfast table. When somebody asks me about something I don’t want to talk about I just hold up my hand and shout “Bravo, Bravo,Bravo!”

Right. What about all the crap Teddy used to spout about Van Helen’s kids because they had them take out all the brown M&M’s backstage in 1986! What a hypothetical cow!

Be careful. That’s how they got Mama Cass.

Fair enough. Then get one of the loser daughters from Wilson Philip’s to do it. They don’t seem to be too proud to appear on the Housewives and all they seem to be doing is avoiding ham sandwiches.

1000 times this. You are absolutely right! They should just retool in a show starring Denise. Keep Garcelle, Sutton and Dorit. Replace Teddy with Brice Springsteen’s daughter. Replace Erica with a blow up doll. Replace Rinna with Tara Reid as they are basically the same person. Replace Kyle with Melissa Gilbert. Go on from there.

If I was Denise I would just say “Sorry they are dropping you from the show Teddy because they just signed Bruce Springsteen’s daughter.”

I am fine with leaving financial crimes off the table if people are not smart enough to follow it. Just get personal and dirty. Erica abandoned her child to become a prostitution whore. Now she is a low rent Anna Nicole Smith. Kyle has a husband who is cheating on her and can’t wait to leave her. He doesn’t want to be in a threesome with her. He doesn’t even want to be in a twosome with her. Rinna is a beard whose marriage is a fraud and who has eased two monsters who are mentally damaged because of her relationship with food. Teddy is a boring fraud who cheats hapless people out of their life savings. Get down. Get dirty. Get personal. After what they are trying to do to her you need to go nuclear.

I hear that Dorinda is going to accuse Tinsley of having sex with Brandi Glanville.

If I were Denise I would start airing all of their dirty laundry and only film and maintain relationships with Garcelle, Sutton and believe it or not Dorit. Denise needs to freeze out and attack the other bitches. Here’s how she can do it. ”Hey Teddy let’s talk about your pyramid scheme where you bilk thousands out of poor saps because you are trading on your famous father and dubious reality TV stardom. Also why was that big burglary at Kyle’s house after your husband reviewed their security arrangements? Does he often set up burglaries?” ”Hey Erica I don’t want my kids around someone who abandoned her son to suck dicks in a strip club in Jersey. What you couldn’t get a gig at Score’s in Manhattan? I know Flashdancers was hiring back then. Also how much of that loan money from his Law firm did Tom spend on your glam squad? Is that why he couldn’t pay the loan back?” ”Hey Kyle you know your husband is so tired of you he has to get high just to look at your bangs? The lights in the pool don’t work? Who ya gonna call? Divorce lawyers! Oh and they are making a “Little House on the Prairie” TV movie and they want you back. To play the cow.” ”Rinna what about the Husband? Is he really gay or just a rapist? Oh by the way I don’t want you around my kids because they have a healthy relationship with food. Have a piece of bread.”

Dude say it isn’t so! We need your snark and shade.

Teddy had no reason to bring up the sex rumors other than to hurt Denise. She is a vile and despicable piece of shit who succeeded in helping drive LVP off the show and now she is trying to do it to Denise. If I were Denise today I would expose her business as the crooked pyramid fraud that it is and put her on blast.

I actually prefer family style because I think you get more food than the tiny portions these chefs sent out.

Teddy is freaking Frank Stallone. Of course she is trading on her washed up father’s fame. No I take that back. Frank Stallone has some talent compared to this hideous waste of breath.

Actually she dumped Adam for the bosun. That’s why Adam was so pissed off that season. I think having her boyfriend be the chef will be a debacle.

Actually Colin and Alex are going in business together. They are opening a bar in Long Island called “The Friend Zone.”

Tinsley has already stated that she is attending. Dorinda is exercising her bony finger and storing up spittle to prepare.

Erica was stripping and giving blow jobs across the river in New Jersey for a couple of years before she moved her act cross country.

I thought Malia diving in was contrived and drama queen central but Sandy holding up a 10 sign to grade the dive was really a little much.