LordOfLotion

No veggies. I should have guessed.

Cancer? MS? Some degenerative thing I've never heard of? Of course I'll do anything I can for you. You ate yourself into this? I'll leave you a salad just out of your reach and call the local welfare office. In the meantime, use this rag and stick for interesting arts and crafts.

I'm just trying to help people here; is that so wrong?? OK how about this... Bend a stick at an angle, and get one of those sets of cosmetic sponges that you pull apart, like those wedges. Except don't pull them apart, maybe take half the brick, put those on the end of the stick, and use that to put on chub rub cream. Those cosmetic wedges are pretty soft and they would get the job done. I'm also thinking about a wall-mounted stick and some strategically placed mirrors. There has to be a better way.

Everything is loading for me, even in Explorer. I don't think they've restricted anything.

I'm on Chrome and everything is still there. When I try to load on Explorer it looks like everything is gone. It could be your browser.

A couple of years ago, there was a story going around from Reddit from a guy with generous girth who had posted about how he had perfected the art of wiping using a metal spoon and some paper towels. He carried it around in his pockets in a plastic ziplock bag. The details were everything you are thinking it was. So that's how the men may be dealing with it.

Freedom wand? Is it for people who have had too many Freedom Fries?

Some kind of slapstick sitcom nonsense about Babs getting clearance to drive again and brushing up against a trash can with the rear view mirror while Witless screams in mock terror. Now that Witless has been shown to be a reeing idiot, someone else has to take the role so that the audience will forget, forget....

Well I've been thinking about how to make an improved rag on a stick since last night, so don't feel too weird about it.

I'm so glad someone said this, because that's exactly what I was thinking.

I was thinking about Zombieland. Rule 1: Cardio.

Now, now, who among us hasn't used a ruler as a back scratcher? Haven't we all used a stick for self care at one time or another?

I think it would have worked if she had bent it at an angle and maybe tied a rubber glove around it so that it wouldn't absorb all the product.

I think she was trying to reach the other hole...

I thought that's what this was.

Just when I started to get my appetite back...

Aww look she got some man candy to help her across the finish line.

I mean I'm a wimp and I know it, so I would have taken some prophylactic Advil prior to the walk if I knew it was going to be like that. I also have stronger stuff left over from surgery if it's that bad. Am I the only one who does that?

I wonder how Todd liked the dolphin's breath.

It's a good thing I wasn't inhaling a box of Ritz Bits like I usually do during these TLC shows.

Great Scott.

There's a scene coming up. I think there's even a rag on a stick.

Hai thar Mr. Judgey! *waves*

Heather, this is SO pathetic. Let it go.

Wait till you see what else she can't do. I just saw a clip of tonight's episode that will make you thankful we don't have Smell-O-Vision.